Advicenators: Ask lorelei!

Hi, I'm Lorelei. I live with my mother, my older sister and my grandmother.
I travel a lot but I'm never a tourist. ;) My mother owns property all over the country and I'm extremely lucky to feel at home in so many different places. It's a lot of fun and I get to see a lot of things and meet a lot of people.
Shopping always seems to be better away from home too.
I'm very fashion-minded and stylish, spontaneous and energetic, dorky and giggly. I enjoy having a good time. Almost too much. I party every chance I get. I do drink but I do so responsibly and you should too.
I'm very young but the year 2003 caused me to learn more about who I am than some people get to learn about themselves in an entire lifetime. Ever since I've made it a point to share what I've learned with everyone possible. Ask and I'll do my best to answer.

Whether or not you found my advice useful, a rating is appreciated, good or bad. Let me know how I can improve.

hey ya kno how when you leave someones column and a star takes you out or it fades away or somethin???(ya sry its hard to explain) HOw do ya do that???THANKS!

That's called a page transition. Here's a link with a bunch of them: http://jansfreeware.com/articles/ie-page-transitions.html

Good luck! ♥

I was rated a ♥

hey i was just wondering on your advice column how did you get your questions to be bold? thanks so much!

I'll explain in steps. :)

1. Go to the "Column Settings" in the left side bar.
2. Create a new style and give it whatever name you want.
3. Edit it. Under "Style Base", use whichever style you like best.
4. Edit it again. In the "Question/Answer Layout" box, find <--question--> and change it to <b><--question--></b>.
Save it and you should be done! :) If you need any more help, just let me know!

I was rated a 5 ♥

how do you keep in shape! like eat helathy nd stuff? PLEASE WRITE A LOT AND HELP ME!

I'm really not as in shape as I coould or should be, but I'm happy to share my routine with you.
When I get up in the morning, I ALWAYS have breakfast. Every morning I possibly can. That way I'm not starving by lunch and can get away with eating light.
For breakfast, depending on how much time I have, I'll either have a bowl of cereal and some fruit and milk, or I'll go all out and have pancakes, eggs, sausage and juice. That sounds kind of fatty, but you can replace a lot of the fat. Like I use I Can't Believe It's Not Butter, Egg Beaters, and low-sodium meats to make my food.
After breakfast, I try to take a walk around my neighborhood, just to get myself totally awake. I come home, shower, and then take care of whatever else I have to do for the day. If I have to go out again and it's within walking distance, I will just grab my CD player and walk.
For lunch, I'll usually have a salad and some fruit, or sometime I'll splurge and have something really fatty, but never more than once a week.
For dinner, I'll have whatever my housekeeper is making, but small portions. Just enough to keep me satisfied through the night. I try to avoid eating til I'm full unless it's a holiday or special event. For dessert, I'll have a cookie or something if I even want dessert.

So I do that plus I do a lot more walking on days when I have to go to work. If I get bored, sometimes I'll put in the pilates video and work out to the for a little while.

My regimen isn't very stiff. I do what I need to do in order to feel healthy. So hopefully I've given you some ideas toward your own routine. Keep it loose because you can end up overworking yourself by trying to keep too stiff of an eating and workout regimen.

Good luck! :) Let me know if I've helped.

I was rated a ♥

in your pictures, in the newer pictures, the first couple your hair is like wavy=ish, how do you do it like that?

My hair is naturally wavy, actually. So when I air-dry it, it comes out like that. When I'm not feeling lazy, I blow dry it straight.

I know of two ways to create waves, though. I'll do my best to explain. :)

After washing and conditioning your hair, apply styling mousse using your fingertips. Run it all the way through your hair to the ends. Then you can either braid your hair, making sure the braids are pretty loose (for bigger waves, use a lot of hair in each braid). Or you can section your hair into quarters then twist the sections until they begin to coil and secure them with bobby pins. Once your hair dries, release your locks, comb them gently (don't brush), use a lil hair spritz and you should be all set to go!

Good luck hon! :)

I was rated a ♥

when you or a guy plays around w/your clit your cherry wont pop...right?

No, your "cherry" is a thin membrane that is inside of your vagina and a few inches back. Something would have to go inside of your vagina in order to "pop your cherry". :)

♥

I was rated a 5 ♥

this question is for my friend:

my boyfriend is so sweet. he'd never cheat on me and he never acts Interested in another girls or stuff like that. do you think he could be gay? because he doesn't seem to be interested when girls are wearing skimpy clothes on tv or pictures and id ont think he looks at it on his own. but he gets horny around me. i don't think he is but soemtimes i wonder.

As long as he isn't checking out guys, I don't see what the problem is. Enjoy having someone who is completely loyal to you.

I was rated a ♥

Hello, i am an 18 yr old grl dating a 28 yr old guy. See i have this thing with me not going to have sex till marriage which is not a bad thing... right? well my b/f knows this and knows my limits.. but see everytime we get alone and stuff he always tries to stick his dick in me. He almost did about hmmmm should i say 5 TIMES!!!!!!
Its not easy to remain abstinent but i tell you what its not FUN EITHER!! Its like your head is telling you go for it and grab the fuckin condoms but yet your heart is like wait a fuckin min. do you really know this guy or is he just using you for sex?? see the 17th is our 5th month anniversay
but yet i knew him for a few months before we started dating. so my question is to you all is what am i supposed to do. He promised me he would never do it again but yet he said that last time. I told him hes lucky b/c usually its like a baseball game 3 strikes your out!! but yet i've given him 5 chances so far and this is the last chance. So what should i do?? let him try and screw me or what?? See I love him to death but as you can tell i am not ready yet! I need help and need it bad! Plz someone help me.. i really need it!!

If he can't honor your limits then you don't need him!
If you aren't ready then you aren't ready and it's completely wrong of him to keep trying to push sex on you, and in such a brutish way. That is a MAJOR invasion of your personal space.

Next time you get together (if there is a next time) don't let him get into a position where he can do that.

Sorry, I know this sounds harsh, but he sounds like a complete jerk.

I was rated a ♥

This girl and me have began liking eachother just recently...we used to be pretty good friends and we always hang out and we never get bored of eachother, and there are never any awkward moments when we are talking. We have a great connection and she feels the same way. So we pretty much like eachother, as I said before. The thing is that i'm into getting a girlfriend for the beginning of the school year, and I talked to her about this already and she said she likes me but doesn't know if she wants a boyfriend. What should I do? Should I lay off the subject and just act like friends....or should I start trying to be more intimate with her? Or....? Please help me out with this!

I wouldn't push it. If she's not ready for a boyfriend, she's not ready. Or maybe she isn't interested the way you'd hope. (sorry, but that could be the case)

At any rate, continue hanging out the way you always do! If she really does like you, she will come to you when she's ready, especially since she knows how you feel about her.

Good luck! ♥

I was rated a ♥

Okay, I'm just kind of curious as to what people will advise me to do about this...
My boyfriend and I have sex - don't get me wrong, he's not bad at it, lol - but I can't seem to orgasm. I mean, we've tried a few interesting positions (lol), and I'll come close and stay there for awhile, but the feeling sort of dies.
I know I'm capable of orgasming, as I can get myself off *cough*, so that's not the problem.
Originally, I thought it was just that I needed to mentally loosen up, but I managed to do that and discovered that wasn't the problem.
I'm sixteen, and a girl, by the way, if that matters. He's the first guy I've had sex with. I don't want to hear "you're too young to be having sex," because age is a state of mind, not being, and I AM old enough for it. Besides, that's not my question.
Anyone have any tips I can give him, or even anything I can do?
Thanks in advance. =)

I'll tell you what worked for me.

Vibrators. :]

Sometimes, during sex, not enough attention is paid to the clitoris. We all know how precious the clitoris is.
Try using a bullet or egg the next time you have sex. You can get one for a pretty reasonable price at http://www.adameve.com

Or if you'd rather not spend the money, maybe try positions where your clitoris is stimulated too. Or ask him to play with it a little during intercourse.

Hope that's helpful. Good luck!

P.S. - I don't let guys give me oral, either. Rock on. :P

I was rated a 5 ♥

Ok i got my period and i have really really bad cramps. i had such bad ones that i threw up 4 times and i had just taken medicine so i threw it up. Also when i sleep i wake up like every hour because it hurts so bad. What is something i should take or do??

I have had this EXACT same problem since I was 12. We're some of the unlucky ones.

First of all, avoid greasy or rich foods during the few days before your period because it can make the symptoms a lot worse.

The second you start to feel cramps, take something for pain (I take two aleve. It works well for me) and lay down. If you can, put a heating pad or a hot water bottle over your stomach.

If that doesn't help and you still get sick, go see a doctor. Your doctor may give you some prescription-strength medicine for your pain, or they may suggest that you try birth control to regulate the hormone levels in your body.

I have had this exact same problem when I was 12. I didn't seek help for it til I got sick for 5 straight days and absolutely had to go to the hospital. I highly suggest seeing your doctor and letting them know.

Good luck and I hope you feel better. I would really like to know how it works out for you (since I don't know anyone else with the same problems I have), so please let me know!

I was rated a ♥

Hey Everyone ! Ok ths is a good one, How come when your single you have the hardest time finding anyone to go out with. But as soon as you have a BF and become Attached Everyone in the world wants to date you. How many times has this happen to you guys? LOL its agravating. But I love my man so no huge complaints here. Have a great day everyone ! xoxoxoxooxoxoxox

It happens to me too. I see it as the fates testing me to see if I'm really committed to whomever I'm with.

I was rated a 5 ♥

I was wondering if u could tell me some websites to get some good midis music files off of cuz im doing somewebsite and i really want some music so could u please tell me some websites thanx

try www.midi.com or www.musicrobot.com

I was rated a ♥

My mom says I should start seeing a gynocologist! I'm scared beyond belief! I really don't want anyone touching or looking down there! =(

I was nervous my first time too. But rest assured, though the first time is a tad awkward, it probably won't be the kind of awkward you might be thinking of.

First, tell your mother right off if you'd prefer a woman gyno. You might be more comfortable for obvious reasons.

The best thing to remember is that your gyno is ONLY a doctor. She's only doing her job. And in the end, it really isn't that much different than your regular doctor looking down your throat with a tongue depressor and that hot little flashlight.

In fact, the first time you go, don't hesitate to ask her about the tools she'll be using, what she'll be looking for and things like that.

As far as physical discomfort, going to the gyno definitely doesn't hurt. Sometimes, you might feel pressure in your stomach but that'll pretty much be it. Even if you are still a virgin.

I hope I've helped. If I haven't feel free to ask me anything else that is on your mind. Best of luck.

I was rated a ♥

When i use tampons and i go to take them out, there is skin or something that i have to move over in order for me to be able to succeed in removing the tampon. Is this normal or should i get it checked out?

I'm sure you're fine. Vaginas come in tons of different designs and even colors. Consider yours a one of a kind designer original. ;)

If you'd really like a bit of peace of mind, tell your parents that, since you're getting older, you'd like to start seeing a gynocologist if you haven't started seeing one already.

I was rated a 5 ♥

i got a shot 2 weeks ago and there is still a big bruise around it and every once in a while a little bubble of blood comes out. why is it still doing that after 2 weeks?

Tell your parents and go back to your doctor. Either your nurse did something VERY wrong, or you may be having a bad reaction to the medicine.

Go see your doctor right away. It could be serious. That is NOT normal.

I was rated a ♥

what would be a good healthy lunch for me to eat while i'm at home?? i'm trying to lose some weight and keep healthy. thanks so much!!

My favorite lunch is salad with tomato, carrots, romaine and fat free ranch dressing and grapes or canteloupe.
In my opinion, raw fruits and vegetables make the best lunch. They're fresh, good for you and they just make you feel good because you know you're eating healthy.
What you could do is next time you go grocery shopping, buy some of your favorite kinds of fruit and veggies (i always get red grapes, canteloupe, baby carrots and cucumbers). When you get them home, slice them up and put them in little baggies. When you're hungry, you just grab a little baggy of fruit or veggies to snack on. You still get that "quick tasty snack" experience you get with things like chips and junk, but it's good for you.
Best of luck!

{I'M EDITING BECAUSE I DIDN'T ANSWER COMPLETELY}
Okay. Sometimes you want something heartier than a salad right? Sandwiches with fat-free condiments are also a good alternative. Use whole-wheat bread, lettuce and tomato so that the sandwich feels like something you can REALLY bite into but isn't too fattening.

I was rated a 5 ♥

i just got my braces off, and my teeth are kind of yellow. do those teeth-whitening products really work? if so, do you know which one? are they that expensive?

I'd recommend asking your dentist about whitening options that you can do at home. I've been using these special toothpastes my dentist gave me. I use one toothpaste in the morning and the other at night before bed and it's really working.

The kind of teeth whiteners you do yourself at home (the strips, the brush on stuff...) they may work but results usually aren't as good and they take awhile. The Crest whitestrips are about 15-16 dollars a box. I tried them for nearly three weeks and they didn't do a thing for me. A friend of mine told me that Rembrandt whitening toothpaste works well for her, too. Just about any home whitening system (that isn't just a toothpase) will run you between 15-60 dollars, depending on what you get.

A good way to help the process is to cut down on cola drinks, coffee drinks, or any other food or drink that may stain your teeth.

In the end, though the best person to ask is always your dentist. Dentists can give you unbiased opinions since they don't gain anything by recommending products to you.

Good luck, honey. Congrats on ditching the braces. I'm sure your teeth are looking beautiful already. :)

I was rated a 5 ♥

ok, i dont know exactly how to get a reputaion of sum kind in 6th grade. I have a popular friend that i dont usualy hang out with. should i start hanging out with her in order to get kool. or not?

Don't hang out with someone to gain social status. Hang out with people whose company you enjoy. Someone's ability to make you laugh is infinitely more important than their ability to get you a seat at the right lunch table. It'll be better for your self-esteem in the long run. Also, you'll see that people are drawn to self-confident people who aren't afraid to be themselves. You really do earn friends by just being yourself.

Not to mention, if you're in the 6th grade, you're only 11 or 12, right? Hon, your popularity in middle school and high school will mean absolutely NOTHING in a few years. You're better off spending time with people you have a lot of fun with rather than worrying about trying to become popular.

I was rated a ♥

I want to start wearing eye-liner and I don't know exactly where on my eye I put it - and what are the good brands. Pencil/Liquid? I'll rate you!

First of all, you don't really need to use an expensive brand. NYC eyeliner or Wet 'N Wild is about a dollar and you can find it at Target or your local drug store.
I suggest using a pencil on your lower eyelid, below the lashes and a liquid on your upper lid.
The tip to keeping pencil eyeliner on all day is to hold the pencil tip over a match or lighter til it starts to melt. Give it a few seconds to cool. It should be cool enough to comfortably touch, but still kind of warm and soft.
Tug gently down on your lower eyelid, and apply the pencil to your lash line and stroke outward towards the edge of your eye until you've got the definition you want.
For your upper eyelid, close your eye and hold your eyelid slightly taut. (just use your finger to pull it a little to the side, so the eyeliner is easy to apply) Use a mirror and a very steady hand to apply the eyeliner RIGHT at the lash line.
Don't be too scared about applying eyeliner, because it shouldn't irritate your eyes too much if you mess up but still be a bit careful.
Good luck!

I was rated a 5 ♥

Hey there everyone! I'm a 16 yr old female and I am a virgin. I am in no way thinking of having sex or asking if i'm too young to or anything, this has to deal more with the future. I am going to wait to have sex until I find a special person, it doesn't really matter if I am married or not. But, I'm afraid that the longer I hold out, it's going to be harder and harder to find a guy that's a virgin also, because it seems like there are none left. So I was wondering if it's silly of me to think that there is a guy out there that is a virgin that I will find somewhere down the road as I get older. Or stop being silly about it and not care?

Once you find the guy you care enough about to give it up to, you won't care about whether or not he's a virgin. If that's even a factor in who you decide to have sex with for the first time, you should probably rethink your "perfect guy" criteria.
Good luck, sweetie. I hope your first time goes better than mine did. :)

I was rated a 5 ♥