about

Thaaaattt's me! The anonymous advice giver from the other keyboard! mwuaha! Actually, I'm a 13 year old give from Southern Cali here to give you some helpful hints on getting through sticky situations without any trouble at all. Send me all your questions on friendships, crushes, and school blues and I'll be sure to get back to you!

advice

I have this friend in the 8th grade im in 7th and shes an only child and she thinks shes soo hot but shes dont wanna be rude but really ugly....she has this crush who has a boyfriend now and she thinks he likes her but he doesnt and shes just ugly im sorry but i cant help it I need help and shes always braging about her looks and clothes and voice and stuff.


friend dinial

Just be honest with her. Tell her that it's not nice for her to brag because it hurts her feelings. Make sure you don't tell her about her looks though because people can take that very personally. Just politely ask her not to brag and talk to her about how you feel.

xOx Emmz

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erm hey... i guess i really need help..i cant stop cutting myself i can not see the real colour of my skin on my arms now they are totaly coverd in purple and blue scars everything depresses me and i cant handle the smallest things i get so caught up with things that i just go for the knife and cut..i've lost many friends for this and been called so many things half the time its what people say to me ''why dont you just fuck off and kill yourself slit your wrist like you do you know like a good goth'' and 99% of the time i do ..im so weak i'm not good for anything..but i really need help too stop if someone could plz help me?? thanks ^.^chok^.^

I know this may seem like the last resort, but you need to talk to your parents or guardian. I know you're probobly reading this and thinking "Wow, she's crazy" but I'm not. I have a friend that cut and she talked to her school counseler. Talking to an adult is the best thing to do because you can explain what is troubling you and they can help you work through it. If I knew you, that's what I would do. Just explain to someone you trust how you feel and what's going on because you are cutting. If you want to put a stop to this, I reccomend talking to a counseler or relative. Good luck!!

xOx Emmz

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I cut. But not like most people. My arms aren't coverd nor my legs. I have scars on my thighs, ankles and wrist. I've recently taken to cuttin my shoulder. my parents know and found them. They know check every so often for blood or anything. they took all my pointy objects away but i still have a knife. they wont let me get cousling or anything because they think its bad for teens to go on meds. i cant go to my schoo counsler because-well if you knew him you wouldnt. Anyways, there are peole with bigger problems then me that need the help. my life is perfect. I have horses. i ride. i get w/e i want. Im spoiled. my parents r nice n everything unlike my friends who r abused/assulted. yet i always feel so depressed. like i cant pull myself out. i constantly cry and hide most of my feeling until i can hide to cut. i dont partically like people knowing but people find out n i dont like being known as a cutter. i get straight a's n im the good kid. least u use to be. now im this depressed, mean, cutter lil freshmen. this isnt who i wanna be. help. oh right..14 female.

Believe it or not, depression is an illness. Not one that will cause death or anything but not something you can talk yourself out of. Tell your parents that you really are being depressed. Be honest with them and tell them how you feel. Explain that you don't want this to go on anymore and that you would feel better if you had a professional to talk to (like a therapist). Hopefully they will understand as long as you make your point clear and express your feelings properly. I wish you the best of luck.

xOx Emmz

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And its causing my legs to hurt in pain. Ive been exerising for two days at the same place. I cant walk properly without having some kind of balance, and I've crawled most of the time even up the stairs. My mom thinks I'm faking it just because I dont want to go exerising again. I dont, because the pain will only get worse. Is doing the same exerise helping me or hurting me?
I'm 15, and female.

It's very important that you talk to your mom immediately. If you continue exercising, the pain could get worse. Tell your mom you will do any of type of exercising but this one just doesn't agree with you. If you sound serious when you tell her this and you make it sound prioritized enough, hopefully she will understand. Good luck!!

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I have chlostrophobia and my parents don't really know. Is this something i should ask my doctor about or is it just something normal?
Plz help. I keep having moments where i can't breath.

I'm a chlostrophobic as well and the best advice I can give you right now is to confront your parents about it. Alot of kids don't realize that talking to your parents is your best bet. Ever since I was little, I've been very open with my mom and dad and I think that's made my transition from childhood to teenagehood much easier. Things like chlostrophobia are hard to understand unless you talk to someone that's older. Good luck!!

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my friend hates my crush and my crush and i are friends! but my friend thinks that my crush is runty and that i deserve better! what can i do to change my friend's mind? i rate!

I know how you feel! It's hard when a friend doesn't approve of a crush because you can't just stop liking someone just because a friend doesn't like them. My advice to you is to explain to your friend that you can't do this. Talk to your friend about your feelings and explain how you feel about your crush. Promise your friend though that this will not change your friendship with them. Make it clear how much you value them as a friend and that you don't want to throw it away because of a crush. Also keep in mind though that you want friends that will accept your desicians so tell your friend how much this means to you. Good luck hun!

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dear x0x Emmz,

My best friend moved away and ive made new ones but i miss her alot and no matter what i wish she was back she was like a soul sista :D but she finnaly comes to visit me and she doesnt even call and when i invite her to sleep over she cant and she doesnt even car when i drove 6 hours to see her for 7 hours go to church with her and spend time with her and then drive back i feel really hurt what should I do should I forget her? should I move on or should i appoligize i dont know HELP ME PLEEZ IM LOST....i dont kno what to do.. she leaves tomorrow and when i call her she never answers AHHHHHHHH HELP I WANT HER BACK I MISS HER SOOOOOO MUCH!

friend dinial :'(

Dear Friend Dinial :'(,
I know exactly how you feel. Friendship is a hard thing especially as a kid. Alot of adults don't understand what we go through because times are changing and alot of the problems we face are different from what they know. My advice to you is to make some new friends. Friends come and go but the best will always stay. She's probobly adjusting to her new surroundings. I promise she hasn't forgotten you but since she's in a new place she's probobly trying to make some new friends. You two may be the best of friends but still, you're not there with her right now and you can't help that. This is probobly having the same affect on her and she might even be afraid to not have you around. In turn, she is probobly trying to make some new friends. It may hurt because at first, it will feel like she's moving on but she's not because I'm sure your friend feels just the same way you do.

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Ok here it goes I have a boyfriend now and i really like him but im debating cuz i like this guy that ive know 4 like 2 years and we are sorta friends hes older then me but thats ok hes friends with my younger brother and i was wondering what to do is it wrong to break up with my boyfriend because I like him should i stay with my boyfriend because i know i dont have a chance with this guy?? HELP ME PLEASE!!
thanx

Dear Friend,
It's really hard to get over crushes. Once you have liked someone for a while, it takes time to adjust to not liking them, especially if you haven't started devoloping feelings for someone else. You're lucky though because you've moved on quickly. However, these feelings are liable to linger for a while so you just have to set yourself straight. I wish I could tell you to be honest with your old crush and make sure all loose ends are tied but I know that's not something that is easy to do. Instead, think about it to yourself. Think of how that relationship didn't work out, and how there is a fresh one for you to enjoy. Be honest to yourself. If there are still feelings strong enough to develop to a relationship with this other crush then you weren't ready to make the conversion. Good luck love!

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Dear oh wise one,

I have a boyfriend now and he hasnt been on for a while havnt talk to him for like a week almost anyway what should I do i sorta like him but he is a very good friend of mine should i go on a date with him and do i kiss him when the moments right? anyway HELP!

Alot of people say there are friends and there are "more then friends". Since you guys are friends, moving to the next step shouldn't be a problem. If you are close enough, you should be able to literally walk each other through a relationship and even ask questions if you have to. If you ever doubt feelings for one another, you always have the past to rely on. Just talk to him about how you feel. I'm sure he will understand. Good luck hun!!!

xOx Emmz

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should i change my look from preppy 2 punk 4 a guy?

Never change who you are, hun. When you meet "the one", he'll love you for the real you, not for who you are pretending to be. Get to know him and find something you have in common to talk about. Hope this helps!

xOx Emmz

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There's this guy who I've been in love with 4 like more than past 6 months. He knows I like him but it seems as if every time i try to IM him he'll either sign off or seem not too interested in talking to me. The only class I have with him is study hall but we never talk there. I really want to talk to him more because maybe if he got to know me better than he might start liking me. I also want to get to know him better. There's no time tho where i could really talk to him in person and i dont know what to say. I really want to be with him and have conversations and stuff. What should i do? please help!

Sometimes it's an uncomfortable feeling when someone knows someone else likes them. It makes it uneasy for them to talk to that person. First, you might have to tell a tiny lie. IM him and say you don't like him anymore, you just want to be friends. Then become his good friend so he will feel comfotable getting to know you. Following this, be flirtacious but not too obvious. He'll probobly start liking you by this time, allowing you to not play so hard to get.

xOx Emmz

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okay well theres this guy that i rlly rlly rlly like but he's a grade lower than me and hes moving at the end of the year

The best way to find if a guy likes you is lead him on slightly. Drop hints and be flirtacious but not too daring. Keep a limit and you'll be fine. If he starts dropping hints then it looks like you may have a relationship in the making. Good luck, hun! I'm here for anymore advice.

xOx Emmz

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im in a bad situation... or kinda odd... ok now i know my guy friend isn't mad at me and so im still waiting for HIM to im ME but theres one small problem.. he doesnt know my new sn and so its going to be IMPOSSIBLE for HIM to im ME! what do i do?!
p.s. REMEMBER i dont want to im HIM, i want HIM to im ME, and its just a test so... ya

Go on your old screename and let him know you have a new screename. Then sign onto your new screename and wait for him to IM you. Hope this helps. Sorry I don't have more to add but I haven't been in this situation before. Best of luck, sweets!

xOx Emmz

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i feel like none of my friends like me b/c no1 ever wants to hang out with me and im gettin rlly upset about it

Throw a party or invite them over. No need to make them like you just reinforce that you are a great friend. Get to know them even better. I'm sure you're probobly a wonderful person and they just need to realize that. Hang tight and everything will work out find. Best of luck to you, hun!

xOx Emmz

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Ok, well my good friend has a boyfriend, I've known her since I was 6 and her and her bf go on the bus. And it turns out that now I have feelings for this boy and it doesn't go away, and I'm starting to get jelous when he kisses her and things. Am I a bad friend, what should I do?

You are absolutely not a bad friend. Hun, if we could pick who we had feelings for then I would deffinetly not be in the situation I am now. You obviously have a crush on him and its natural to feel jealous when you see the two of them kissing and showing affection. What you have to do is keep your feelings to yourself for a while. Become his good friend. Talk to him, understand him. Unfortunately, she beat you to him but just take time. Their relationship won't last forever because relationships at a young age don't. All you have to do is be his friend and a little flirting won't hurt anybody. Good luck!

xOx Emmz

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im in 8th grade (13 / female) and well in my gym class this year i have like no one to talk to.. there's the popular girls that somehow have the same class together .. the unpopulars, the geeks, the preps, and some of the jocks, and then there's me .. i dont really fit in to any of those categories (i guess i`m just average) .. well heres the real problem i actually do have a friend in my class, lets call her Monica but she doesnt even look at me, I guess shes embarassed to be seen with me or something cuz the whole class long she hangs out with this girl lets call her Jessica. And well when they hang out together their like all BFF and they really kinda arent .. anyways should i tell Monica or not ( like she knows i want to switch classes but i never told her why) . .what should i do ?

p.s. sorry its so long and kind of confusing

If Monica is your true friend then she will undersand how you feel. Be honest with her and tell her you are effected by this. Tell her you need to talk to her and explain everything. If she blows it off and pretends it never came up then she isn't a good friend. I'm sure you are very nice and will find another good friend.

xOx Emmz

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How would be the best way to get trust as a Guy? Girls think all we want is ya know!!!! 17 male

Just act like your self. Girls don't want to seem "pressured" and don't get the wrong kind of girl. Trust me, as a girl, I know. Trust takes time, not just a few dates. Get to know her and let her get to know you. Tell her your goals and values and be clear on what kind of relationship you want. She will be charmed by your stability and ambition.

xOx Emmz

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Okay, so there's this guy. We're sort of friends, but there's complicated issues between us. A while back, like in May/June, I liked him and he liked me, but we never went out or anything. Because of certain reasons I'm not willing to explain. Anyway, I've gotten over him and I really like this other guy. But whenever I talk to or see the guy I used to like (we'll call him Bob), I usually get butterflies in my stomach and get kind of nervous. Yet that doesn't happen when I'm around the guy I like now. And I really like this guy, I do not like Bob. Seriously, I am being honest with myself. But then how come I always get butterflies in my stomach when I'm around Bob? Does that mean I like him and I just can't seem to admit that to myself..? I seriously don't think I like him though. Arrgh, I don't know. The thing is, I don't even have a reason to like him. So what's the deal here??!!!

Telling yourself you don't like someone is hard. When you make a transition from guy to guy, it's hard because you can still feel the linguring love that hangs around. Right now, since nothing is for sure, hang with both guys. Pretty soon you'll sway either towards Bob or away. Good luck, hun!

xOx Emmz

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Hi, i have a friend who has bad b/o. I'm not that kind of person who can say "Would u mind putting on some deoderent?" I could never do that to a friend. I was wondering if anyone could tell me how to tell her without hurting her feelings. Please my b-day party is coming up and shes coming, i dont want to afend my other friends. Please, I really need some help.

When you're with her say... hey! guess what! i found this deoderant and it may sound silly but it smells FABULOUS! Wanna try some? It's a nice way but also gives a hint that's not direct. You're friend won't be offended and she'll be smelling fresh! Just make sure you pick a scent she'll like!

xOx Emmz

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I have a problem...as you may have read ealier I like this guy named Max and he looks at me sometimes. Most people tell me to say hi or strike up a conversation with him and I just don't have the guts too. If you are going to tell me "Oh don't worry what other people think" then don't even bother to answer this question. I need better advice than that. I really don't know what to do. I have been rejected 4 times in the past 3 years...so I'm not all that attractive then. Help!

I completely understand about the 'not having the guts to talk to him' thing. Some people are not as brave as others. My advice to you is to have a friend talk to him. Alot of the time, friends are the best messangers. They will feel comfortable finding out information for you. It's a great favor because if they don't like him then they can ask whatever you want them to. That's usually how I end up finding out who likes me.

xOx Emmz

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