Ask, and ye shall receive.
Gender: Male
Location: Somewhere between the Atlantic and Pacific
Member Since: September 28, 2006
Answers: 28
Last Update: November 19, 2006
Visitors: 2215
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Is it true that bird feces will ruin car paint? (link)
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Wow, see the two people below me? Idiots.
One of the charactaristics of bird shit is that it is acidic. Not highly, but enough that if bird crap sits on a pain job, it slowly eats away at it. This can cause holes in your clear coat, discolored splotches in the base paint beneath it, and if left on long enough its insanely hard to remove because its kinda melted its way inside your paint.
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Well I met this guy at the dog park. He's incredible, and we totally hit it off. Then, this afternoon, we made plans to meet again, and we did, and though we didn't talk as much (there were other people there we were talking to) I had an incredible time. He's one of my myspace friends, should I message him and tell him I had fun, or would that be wierd? Should I wait a while? How long should I wait to see if he wants to hang out again?
Also I'm 18 and he's 24, do you think he'll think I'm too young? Ah this is so crazy I'm so infatuated with him. (link)
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You obviously havent been made aware of the vast amount of "barely legal" porn in existence. Unless hes looking for a wife he isnt going to think 18 is too young.
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Ok Take Me Serious..I May Sound Selfish But I Dont Care..
Im relaly considering giving up life, ive nearly died so many times. Someone wants me dead..
My ex tried to kill me..
Everyone walks over me..Hurts me once comes back for more and hruts me again
I cant handle life any longer Its killing slowly id rather get it over and done with :'( (link)
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First, about life. To the best I have been able to determine, there is no Plan. We arent here "for a purpose". We dont have a destiny.
To me, thats the most kickass part about being alive. You can do everything or nothing at all. Its up to each individual to find meaning in his or her surroundings, to find their own joys, their own pains, and their own path in life.
Second, people walk all over you because you let them. Im not saying thats the only reason things happen, but you need to realize something. There is ONE common thread in all your experiences. You. The fact is that there are assholes out there. We cant change that, the only thing you truly have power over is yourself. Its up to you to make changes in your own life, good or bad. If you let the world make them for you, the changes are usually not to your benefit.
Third, about not being able to take life any longer. Trust me, you can. Id like you to think back to all the shit you've had to deal with in your life. Then think about the word "had". Its in the past. You beat it. You conquered it. YOU ARE STILL HERE. That in and of itself is an accomplishment to take pride in.
Fourth, and lastly. Whats really waiting for you? If you end it, you have two possibilities. Hell and Nothingness. Ok, well the third is reincarnation, but given that actions taken during life affect who you come back as, you might come back as a goat. Do you really want to give up being human for being a goat? They eat metal and make the worlds worst tasting cheese. More seriously though, ending it doesnt make anything better. Either you go to eternal torture or you are nothing more than a sad memory to those who know you. Thats no way to go out.
Id reccomend, first, finding some goals. They dont have to be big, just something for you to shoot for. As you go along, your goals get bigger, better, and provide alot more satisfaction. Example, my goals are to finish grad school, teach, get my PHD, have kids with my fiancee, and a few others. Thats alot on my plate, but it gives me things to work for.
Lastly (I promise this really is last) at least make it to college. In high school, your social structure in classes does not at all resemble the real world. I hated high school, and I was actually one of the more popular people in school when I was younger. College was like a lifetime of breaths of fresh air. All of a sudden, life is opportunity.
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My friend's are into druds, alcohol, smoking ,ans sex. I'm just not interested in any of that stuff at all! I think it's just wrong, but my friends say it'll make me look cool, but, i don't think it will. I think it'll make me look stupid. I'm afraid of giving in, what shoul i do? (link)
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Ill offer you an older perspective on things.
Someday, you will look at the things you do and judge _yourself_ based on how _you_ feel about the things you do. And when this day comes you will most definately not like it if you do things you dont feel good about because you want to impress someone else.
It will make you look cool. To possibly many people. You will not be one of the people who thinks youre cool. You will just realize that youre friends with people who only like you so long as you do what THEY think is right. Thats no way to live or maintain friendships.
You are right not do do any of the above. You are right not to do them because you are making a choice based upon what you personally think is right, and choosing instead the path that you think is best for you. That shows an incredibly remarkable lvl of maturity for someone who Im guessing isnt past 14.
Keep it up. Tell your friends that you dont have a problem with them doing what they want to, as long as they respect your decision NOT to. If you cant hang out with them without pressures to join the group and do what they do, find some new friends.
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i love my boyfriend a lot and i lost my virginity to him, its just that when we have sex he only lasts about 5 min! EVERYTIME! and its usually always the same position, i want him to last longer and be more spontaneous/wild in bed.. yet i cant say anything or else ill make him feel bad!! how can i get him to loosen up and try different things!! please HELP! (link)
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Saying nothing means nothing changes. Sit him down and talk to him. Communication.
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my female roommate in an all girls group home raped me, well idk if she really raped me. at first she did then i really liked it. what should i do. be mad or happy to have finally gotten laid. (link)
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First, things done against your will are never a good thing, if only for the fact that it means you are not in control of your own situations. You should report your room mate to someone, so that she is unable to repeat this with someone else.
Now. As to the rest. Rape is rape, the definition is clear. However, your reaction to it is your own choice.
The rest of this is my pragmatic side speaking, its not a common view of the world, but it might help.
Many people would tell you you should be devastated, that you should seek therapy, that you should be angry and hurt and all that. I say, if you can avoid it, save yourself the trouble, and dont be too broken up about it. If you can take the perspective that "shit happens" then putting this behind you will be alot easier. Just learn from the experience.
And honestly. If you enjoyed it, then dont let it traumatize you. She is not absolved of the fact that you did not consent, and in the future just dont let someone use you. Dont let her use others either, because while you may not feel that violated, a different girl in your shoes might not be able to handle it as well as you can, and its not right to let this girl fuck someone else's life up.
Lastly, do not listen to "hatemylover" below. Loss of virginity involves consenting sex. Your first is the first you choose. Remember that if story time ever comes around.
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Sooo...ive been dating my boyfriend for 11 months. (I'm a 15 year old girl). Its been the best 11 months of my life...but its VERY stressful....my bf is a very very jealous boy. We have every class together in school (10th grade). Pre-boyfriend i had a billion guy friends...and now i have like 2. Whenever i go up and talk to ANY guy..even the dorkiest guy in the class...he completely flips out on me. I'm afraid that hes a huge control freak. Almost every day he gets mad at me for it..and i end up in tears at nighttime because he drills it into me til i feel guilty for just TALKING to a guy. I tell him time and time again that im just talking..but he insists that i dont know when i flirt and that i "giggle and bat my eyes". I know that isnt true...and i try sticking up for myself.It usually ends up in a HUGE fight where he and i threaten that were gonna go hurt ourselves and sometimes he does...which makes me feel even more guilty. Hes the perfect example of the jock who starts varsity basketball and is really good looking...and i hate to make him hurt himself and ruin his rep. I cannot imagine leaving him..but i really really need some advice on what to do. Sorry this was so long..but please help me.. (link)
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you need to leave him and you both need your heads on a little straighter. The fact that you threaten each other that youre going to hurt yourselves is incredibly messed up on a number of different levels. You both need to get away from each other, neither of you is mature enough to handle this relationship.
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Do you have to be a certain age to purchuse a vibrator im 14, and if so...where can i go to get one? (link)
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Generally you have to be 18 to go anywhere that sells vibrators. I dont know about any age restricting laws about sale to or use by a minor, but in some places its just illegal to sell them, and pretty much everywhere you can get one is an adult book/video/novelty/apparel store and those tend to make sure youre 18 before you buy anything.
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How do you report somebody from AIM?
and can the police trace screen names? (link)
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No, police cannot trace screen names directly.
What police use to trace someone is IP address. Im sure you've heard of the chat sites that exist on the web. The way they catch online predators, is when you log into a website the site takes a log of your IP address, basically your location on the internet. With an IP address police can find out from your internet service provider the street address that the connection came from.
With aim, however the connection is directly computer to computer. And the connection can change locations (signing on to various computers with a screen name) so the only way police can trace someone is if they are actually on one of the computers that is party to the convo (like they sign on to your screen name themselves) and have some specialized software to crack aim for an IP (aim hides IPs by default to protect users).
If you have a problem on aim, block the person. The function exists for a reason. Police do not care about you being harrassed. They only care in situations where they can actually get a conviction with minimal effort because convictions look good on a policeman's resume.
Block the person. Get a new screen name. It is entirely possible to solve this yourself, dont go looking to the police for help. They arent here to help you. They are here to make money and earn prestige by putting people in jail, and screen name harassment isnt going to do that for them.
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16/f- I like this guy, he's 17, and I met him a couple years ago during summer school, and we really hit it off, we were extremely flirty everyday and everyone thought we were going to end up dating. Well, when school started, I never saw him, so we drifted apart, but I still liked him. This year, I have a class with him, and we are flirty again, but I can't tell if he likes me or not. During summer school, we had the opportunity to be cuddly and such, but now there's not, so it's obviously not as bad as it used to be, but he picks me to be partners with, and he compliments me, and talks to me all the time, and just flirts. All my friends think we are destined to be together, and sometimes I do too, but he's just not making a move or anything. I've majorly hinted before. But please don't tell me to just call him up and invite him out, it's not going to happen. but 1) Do you think he likes me? 2)how can I get him to be more than friends?
any help would be wonderful =) (link)
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Hes shy. Go up to him and tell him theres a movie youd like to go see, and youd like him to take you out on a date to go see it.
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I met this gurl in Sept. in a welfare office. I was shy and my sister gave me the entrance to talk to her. Well, she is pregnant and due in late November. The father has nothing to do with the pregnancy and she doesn't want him around. I first started to help her, like buy her stuff for the babyshower and give her money and help pay bills, just as friends I said. We flirt often and i develop feelings for her. i just don't know should I tell her I like her or wait till she gives birth. she gives me clues by calling me and chatting, ask me to buy dinner and even asked me to be there during delivery. Wat is going on from a female side????? (link)
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You dont want babydaddy drama.
General guy-wisdom dictates you dont get involved with a single mother unless her kids at least 5 and healthy. Why? Because the kids getting to the age of schooling, making things easier on you, and if she can get a kid to 5 as a single mother shes not going to dump the responsiblity on you.
Come back in a little over 5 years.
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okay so my boyfriend wants to finger me and so far hes felt me through like sweatpants.. but next time we hang out.. he wants to go in my pants and i dont mind.. except.. what does he expect to find as far as pubic hair goes? we never talked about it because i dont want to bring it up.. should i shave it or trim or what???
16/f. thanks (link)
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Most guys prefer less than a full, natural bush. Reccomend trimming it close with a beard trimmer or some such, (like less than 1/2 inch) and if he makes any comments or you want to ask him, find out what he prefers. It really doesnt matter that much until the subject of more than fingering comes up.
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15/M My locker is next to someone who has some bisexual friends. There are 2 of them. The other day when school was over, one of them was like, hitting on me and saying that I'm cute and sexy and stuff like that. I'm straight, so I got a little freaked out. I am used to getting that from girls, but I'd never had someone who's gay do that before. The kid is pretty proud of be bi, too. He wears shirts that say stuff like "Don't hate, celebrate," and "Gay pride." He also wears rainbow-colored shirts and he wears make-up and acts and sounds very feminine. So it's not like he's trying to hide anything. Anyway, the other day when he did that, I got all mad and called him a fag, queerbag, and other derogatory words and yelled at him. And then, yesterday, he was standing in front of my locker, but instead of politely saying excuse me, I said, "get out of my way, you faggot," and then I grabbed him and pushed him out of my way. Then I said, "did you like that when I grabbed you, gay boy." Some of my friends said to go beat him up, but I would never do anything like that. My mom thinks that bisexuality is wrong because she thinks that people should pick to like one or the other. She doesn't hate anyone, and neither am I. I'm not against gay people. But what should I do to deal with this and what should I say to the kid to apologize? When those 2 incidents occured, everyone around was laughing at him and teasing him. I feel bad for him and I felt guilty. The rate of suicide among gay teenagers is high, and I don't want him to commit suicide and then blame me for it. What can I do to get rid of my anger? Is there counseling or anything? (link)
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Both of you were out of line.
In the future, if a guy hits on you, interrupt him and tell him youre straight. Just a "dude, I dont swing that way, to back off" will work.
If a guy progresses past that hes trying to make you uncomfortable, so not keeping your cool means he wins, automatically.
Judging by the attire he chooses, especially to wear in high school, hes the type who likes to shove his sexuality in front of people because he enjoys making them uncomfortable. Tell people like that to back off. If they dont shut up, just ignore them. Also, one of my favorite comments is to just ask guys like that "Hey, are you so annoying that gay guys cant stand you and youre reduced to hitting on the straight?" or something along those lines.
If he crosses the touch barrier, thats when its ok to be a little more aggressive about it. You dont need to hit him, but letting him know its not appreciated is not out of line.
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i like my bfffff brother who is only 10 and im 13 is that messed up what should i do....
this is sydneys friend not the girl in the picture (link)
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By the time hes old enough to date you will have moved to the age where you'll be chasing college guys. Move on.
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is it normal that i am like DESPERATE for a bf? i mean i would take any guy that had a good personality. i just want something real and a commitment. Is this normal or no. If he ain't gonna give me the real deal though i'd rather have no one......what's your opinions on this? (link)
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Desperation attracts a different sort than interest. Honest opinion? You arent going to attract the kind of guy you want if you are desperate, and it shows.
Also, desperation means things get rushed. Anyone who rushes into a committed relationship is a fool, and things like that only work out if the two people just happen to be amazingly compatible.
The usual result is one of you feeling suffocated by the other and leaving.
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I'm a virgin and I want to stay a virgin until marriage. Don't get my wrong; this question is not about fighting perr pressure to change my mind. Actually, I'm worried about my friends. There are only 4 girls in my church youth group including me. The other three have all lost their virginity. (My youth group age range is 11-15 btw) One of them is a slut, mostly because she's gulliable and likes guys WAY TOO MUCH. Another one of them, my cousin, lost her virginity to a player, and now has fallen for another player, who is a guy in my youth group! He's the brother of the slut, and he's a manwhore, too. She's determined to make him fall in love with her, even if it means using her body to tempt him. She made a video for her of herself acting sexy and talking dirty. Luckily she hasn't given it to him yet. Now, outside my youth group... One of my long-time crushes (age 14) who also goes to church and was our 8th grade valedictorian... he's a teen father. He got his girlfriend pregnant. And she's only 14, too. So, I'm really scared. I don't want my friends to get STDs or get pregnant. I want them to have morals. Plus, if they are acting like this... is there anyone left out there besides me whose still decent? These people are Christians, you'd think they'd have some sense! But they don't! I'm already worried that I'm never going to be able to find a husband that hasn't been with another girl... Yet I'm so powerless because if I boss around my friends, they won't be my friends anymore. HELP! & Sorry this is so long! (link)
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Alright, first Im going to speak to your attitude. Because it could lose you alot of friends. You have a severe superiority complex, the use of the word Fornicators shows it plainly.
You are correct about your friends being stupid. They are immature and dont know/havent been taught any better. However, your attitude about being morally and religiously superior to them wont help things. You use derogatory terms to describe them, and Ill just tell you now that that serious level of judgement is no better in Gods eyes than what they are doing. You arent being a friend, you are using them to feel better about yourself.
Now, onto the meat of your question. You cannot teach your friends morals. Why? Because undoubtedly they do not look up to you. You have been taught more common sense than they have, but you are just as immature. They will recognize that, especially once kids get past the age of about 13 they think they know everything. Its pretty much built in. They would need to get information from a source that they decided knew more than they did. Which is a rare thing with teens these days.
Talk to them. Do not preach. By preach, do not tell them that what they are doing is wrong and they are stupid. The easiest thing to do is ask questions. Questions that will make your friends think.
An example is asking them what THEY know about STDs. Most kids honestly dont know that much, other than that they exist and can be passed during sex.
Dont bring up christianity in this. You commented that christians should have more sense. To be honest, most christians dont have any more sense about sex than anyone else. People who have a balanced view on sex usually approach it from a medical standpoint, not a religious one (because religion doesnt take medical fact into account in its beliefs most of the time) but thats a bit off topic. Again with being preachy, christianity wont make your friends think youre right, it will just make them think you think they are idiots, and will close them off to anything you have to say.
Just understand that they are entitled to make their own mistakes, and that the path you walk in life isnt neccesarily for everyone. A good friend will just try to help them help themselves, minimize the effects of the mistakes, and make sure that they are at least informed about the real life consequences of their actions.
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what happens if you take three dosuse of your birth conrtol pill ? (link)
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Possible side effects?
Well Im going to say up front, Im not a doctor. But to give you something to go buy, the morning after pill is basically like taking alot of birth control pills at once.
If you are pregnant, it could cause a miscarriage. It could possibly mess up your period timing. Various other possibilities.
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Okay so I like this boy and I thought he liked me but all he wants to do is have sex. Should I or should'nt I? I always told myself I would never think of things like this I would always just say no, but for some reason I think this is the boy for me and i wouldnt wanna ruin anything by saying no. What should I do? (link)
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Alright. Ground rule, for the rest of your life. Sex does not save relationships. It only prolongs the inevitable. You shouldnt.
First, he is not the boy for you. If you are young enough that this is even a question, I can promise you will date other guys, probably alot of other guys.
Second, he is not the boy for you. If he just wants sex, and saying no is ruining the relationship, then he obviously doesnt care much about you, he only cares about the open or closed status of your legs.
Take a lesson from this. At your age, boys desires generally arent that complex. If he wants sex, thats about all he wants and is willing to give up most everything else for sex. If he wants love, hes willing to give up pretty much everything else (including sex) for love. Guys who want love care about you more than about sex, and so thats what you should search for.
When youre older (think 20s and up) sex becomes a more expected part of a relationship because most people expect you to be used to intimacy and be comfy with it, through age and experience. Right now, sex should not be expected, and if it is you shouldnt be giving it out. Because this guy doesnt want to share an intimate moment with you. He wants to get laid, tell his friends hes getting laid, and he sees you as the easiest way to do things.
Dont make the mistake of becoming anyones sex toy.
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13/f
i want a belly button ring so bad. not this year though. next year, in 9th grade. the thing is though, my mom won't let me. she said i have to wait til i move out when i'm 18. SIX YEARS?! um no i'm not waiting that long lol. i know a ton of people who have them and they haven't had a problem. i know they can get infected, but that's only if you don't take care of it and stuff. how can i convince her to let me? it's not fair 6 years is too long lol.
thankss (link)
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You wont be able to.
Why?
First reason, is that your parents are not comfortable with the idea of you getting pierced. Piercings serve two purposes. One, is so that you can identify with certain people. Two is that piercings are considered attractive by some, and getting them makes you more attractive.
Now, take a look at your mother's perspective. There are things you can do to be part of the crowd (we can tell thats a motivation from comments like "a ton of people have them") that dont include having holes poked in you. And at 13, shes definately not comfy with the fact that you want to get piercings because shes not comfy with the thought of you doing something that will make you more attractive to guys.
You may have read questions about why parents wont let them wear thongs? Same thing, parents dont want to see their children as attracting sexual attention. They dont want to consider the possiblity of guys looking at you and wanting to sleep with you, youre still their little girl to them.
My reccomendation, is to wait. Why? Because you can always get piercings later. I realize you are impatient. I realize that you feel left out because you want a piercing, and your parents dont want you to have one, while many of your friends have been allowed. Yeah, it can suck to not get what you want. But respecting their wishes while you are living in their house is a sign of maturity. Not many people have that, I certainly didnt when I was your age, but its not a bad thing by any means.
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I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years and i want to have sex with him but then i dont because i feel like i'll be betraying my mother and disrespecting her house i know im only 17 soon to be 18 in just 11 months.but i really love him and we want to but im scared i don't know what to do. So could someone out there please help me? (link)
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If you feel it would be disrespectful to your mother's wishes, and thats something thats important to you, then I think you should continue as you have been.
I personally never gave a shit about what my parents thought, many people are like that, but if you want to respect your parents I think thats admirable. It shows alot of maturity. When you hit the point where you are comfortable, and you choose to have sex, you wont regret it.
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