ok... so my friend doesn't want me to go out with this guy. shes gone out with him and so have i. but i really do like him. she says that hes an ass hole. but i dont think so. she said that he is only nice until he has you as his gf. and then he will ignore you. she told me that if i went out with him she wouldn't talk to me for a long time. he doesn't live here, he lives in another town. she says that he will cheat on me if i go out with him. im worried that he might. part of me wants to go out with him but part of me doesn't at the same time. he has told me that he likes me and i told him i like him to but he hasn't asked me out. does he really like me? should i go out with him and lose my friend?
Okay, here goes. It is very important for you to be with your friends and to be trustworthy with them all. I think if you really want to go out with this guy (we'll get to his personality in a minute) then you should be able to. Your friend isn't much of a friend if she's willing to sacrifice your friendship with her over a silly guy. Your friendship isn't worth much if she can actually do that. Go to her and talk to her about it. Ask her why she blackmailed you and why you can't have a shot at being his girlfriend and possibly seeing that he really isn't like that or changing him if he is. It just isn't fair for you to not get a chance. Be calm when you talk to her, make sure she understands that you really love her as a friend and don't want to lose her. Be nice about it. Now since he hasn't asked you out, you shouldn't be worrying so much if he'll cheat on you because nothing is going on yet. If he does ask you then i think you should go out with him. You need your chance to try it out with him, who knows, he could be "the one." And if he does ask you out, you will be able to tell if he truly does like you. If your friend is a true one, she'll let you give this relationship a shot. You shouldn't lose friends over a guy. And, if after all this, you still lose your friend. Move on, she wasn't worth it in that case. Friends are forever. Good luck.
-ally
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okay well im a freshman and i have a boyfriend (a junior) who used to smoke and party all the time. And i kno he likes to drink but i told him if he ever went back to smoking or got drunk that i would leave him with no questions asked. And i have this trusting problem... i dunno it's just realy hard for me to belive people. Like i always think their lieing to me or will eventually. I have my reasons why (family issues id rather not discuss. And he swears on his life that he won't get drunk ever again. But what if hes lieing to me and has been lately?? But i kno he loves me alot and wouldn't do anything that wouldn't make me happy. But i still have my doubts. Do you think he still drinks? And any ideas on how to help with this trusting thing? Any advice at all in general id be willing to take! thanks so much i love you!
i've answered questions with this quote before and i'll use it again. "Innocent until proven guilty." You have no proof that he is drinking again and i'm not talking about "you heard it from someone at school" i'm talking about actually catching him in the act. You HAVE to HAVE to HAVE TO trust your boyfriend or you could have some totally serious issues. If he was willing to change who he was for you, it's obvious he cares about you very much and you need to put faith towards that. If you don't your relationship could end quite quickly and i am very very serious.
about the putting faith towards his love and trusting him thing..i don't know what you can do. You have to do something, whether it's therapy, or whatever. I do know that you have to be able to trust yourself so just be careful. If you are suspicious of your boyfriend or anyone for that matter keep it to yourself. do not tell anyone and do not do anything to prove yourself right. if something really is up you will find out in time when you are supposed to find out. eventually each time you are proven wrong you will learn when and when not to trust your "instincts" on this. i hope i helped and please...be careful. Your relationship and maybe friendships are at stake here. good luck.
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im a female 16 and me & my bf have been on & off for 2 years now we are long distance and it started out as a summer romance at the beach because my family spends the summer up there but turned into love. ok im madley in love with my boyfreind & when i talked to him the other day he said his freind came over and told him he should take this one girl he dated while we were seperated to the prom. i asked him if he was and he said he wasnt going to and he told his freind no but im kinda scared do you think hes still seeing this girl? do you think mabey he was hinting that he wanted to go to the prom and that mabey we should go? please tell me what you think.
guys are complex from where i'm standing but i think he may have been hinting at it. i mean, why wouldn't he want to go the prom with his girl friend? especially when it's long distance and he doensn't see you as much as if he had a girlfriend near by. 2 years with him should be enough to know if you can trust him with other girls. remember that saying, innocent until proven guilty? i'd stick to that if i were you. i think you should talk to him about prom and see if he wanted to go with you and tell him you will if or if not he did. prom's a fun time. good luck.
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ok well there was this guy, he was like a nerdy inda guy. i dont like him, at all. and at a party there were these guys having a kissing contest and were trying to see how many kisses they could get foom girls. and the nerdy guy wanted to too and he asked me for a kiss. i asked him to wait a second and i left and never came back, he look so sad. i feel bad cuz i never thought id break someones heart. i dee him at school sometimes. i feel really really bad. what should i say if he asks me about it? thanks, appriciate it
Well, kisses are very intimate and personal and if you didn't want to kiss him you then you shouldn't have but the way you turned him down was a little harsh. i'm sure he won't talk to you but if you could befriend him and just not mention it that'd make his day. you shouldn't pre judge him for being known as a geek. i bet he has some good qualities you'll like to be his friend. good luck.
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i have this friend who thinks she's like really hot, but she's isn't. whenever you're at the mall or w/e she always all "that guy is so staring at me" or "he is so checking me out", when the guy is staring at ME. how can i break it to her w/o wrecking our friendship?
it sounds to me as if you think ur really hott. yeah she may say things like "hes checking me out" but that's most likely wishful thinking. and you dont know for sure who he's looking at if you are sitting right beside her and next, what kind of a friend are you? you are basically calling ur friend ugly and thats not nice. before you look for other people's faults, look at your own. that's all i have to say. good luck
-ally
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Here is the thing, yesterday I took one of my friends to see her boyfriend and she wanted me to stay with her so i did. And her bf(we'll call him steve) had one of his friends over(we'll call him rick), well i was talking to rick for awhile and I think i am starting to like him but I have no way of talking to him except through steve which is also one of my friends but how can i get steve to ask rick if in anyway he would like me or how can i just be able to see him with out sounding desperate to steve? I was thinking something like a double date? HELP please anything will help!!! thanks alot
well, it sounds to me as if you have the answer. a double date would be a good idea. that's most likely what i would tell you to do in the first place so there's no reason for you to even ask the question. you have the answer urself. good luck to you.
--ally
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I am a 14 year old girl and I have this guy friend that I've been really tight with since like 2nd grade. We were the only two to go from our elementary school to our middle school so we kind of had only each other for the first part of 6th grade. But over the years we've both really changed...him I'm afraid for the wrost. He's gone totally goth...I mean hardcore. Black EVERYTHING and "satan worshiping". Now I'm afraid he's doing drugs and seriously worshiping satan, not just joking. I mean we're still pretty tight, but he just doesn't seem to be able to tell me anything. I talk to him...and tell him just about everything, but he only jokes with me. and doesn't tell me the truth when I ask him directly. I just don't know how to approach him though. I tried today, but he wouldn't be home cuz he was going to his stoner friends house. And that worries me even more. I know, I'm rambling, but I'm really depress/worried about his future. He is really like the smartest person I know, but he's doing the stupidest things I've ever heard of. Hopefully you have some insight. and you might even know who this is....I just need help.
if this is who i think it is, well i'll answer the question as best as i can but you should talk to me directly about him. you see, i have absolutely no idea what there is to do. if he's on to satan worshiping now *i dint know that* then i'm really scared for him cuz it seems hes too far gone. do his parents or your parents know about everything he's doing? are they doing anything about it? the best i think you can do is just be his friend and steer him right when you see he's going the wrong way. he's just lost his way, with you being as good a friend as you are, its likely he'll turn back at some point. talk to me sometime about..outside the column. bye
:)
-Ally
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my mom keeps getting mad at me for wearing make up....all i wear is eyeshadow and eyeliner... once i wore mascara and she blew up... so i stop wearing mascara, and she was fine, she didnt care about me wearing make up anymore... as long as i just dont wear mascara... after a week my aunt came in and said i looked like a witch becuz of my make up... my mom got so mad that she yelled at me and threatened to kick me out of the house, and slapped me... what should i do? i need help, she can't even live up to her pride and stick up for me.... she thinks that if people think you look bad than you better do what ever you can to make them happy about your looks... i told her not to care what people think because its just plain stupid to be liked by some one that doesn't like your looks... people should care about your character and smartness but not looks... i mean i even get good grades at school and i think thats enough.
this one person before me said it all depends on how old you are and that is very true. if you are younger than 14 or so then yea you should totally stop wearing make up. that is still pretty young and its not necessary to wear makeup. if you are older that 14 or something than it may be better just to not wear make up very often or just wear it with your friends. if a family member like ur aunt for instance has come over just don't wear makeup. i know what you mean about the "care about the character" thing but this is different, this is your family and you should do what you can to listen to them. its not lying to ur parents necessarily if you dont wear it often around them. just try to please ur parents right now cuz you have to live with them the rest of your life and keep ur makeup amount minimal when you do wear it around them maybe you can just get rid of the eyeliner, it looks icky w/out mascara just wear a little foundation and blush and eye shadow as a start then gradually get more. everything should work out. hope it goes alright.
:)
--aLlY
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well i went out with a guy for about 7 months. then we broke up. i really love him and he always tells me that he still loves me and misses me. he was acting like he wanted to go back out w/ me. so i tryed to get him back but last night i found out that he wouldnt go back out w/ me. now there are two really hot guys that want to go out w/ me. but i still love my ex-boyfriend. i like the two other guys a lot but i dont want a boyfriend because im still not over my ex. now i dont know wut to do!! what do u think? what guy should i go w/ or none at all?
it looks to me as if your ex was leading you on a bit there. i think maybe he just wanted to see if you wanted him but pretending he wanted you. it was cool of you to try again and go for what you want, that took guts and i give you props for that. about these 2 other guys, well if ur not over your ex, you prolly shouldn't go out with them. i mean, you could if you really truly wanted to but it's just not fair to them to be in love with someone and go out with them. that could blow up in your face and you got things to deal with now. i think that you should just take some time to move on from ur ex-boyfriend and not go out with anyone. after all you don't need a guy to be happy or have fun. just take some time for urself and when you feel you're ready you should go out with people, but only then. good luck with everything, i hope it all works out.
:)
--aLlY
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last year one of my best friends went out with this guy for about a month. they broke up because he never really liked her. this year the 3 of us have a class together so im with him alot. he told my best friend (his ex) that he kinda likes me and i started having feelings for him to. but my friend just told me that she really likes him and hasnt gotten over him since last year. i dont know if i should tell her i like him to or just ignore it. she wants to go out with him now because shes not going to the same school as us next year. should i say something to her or just wait to see if we still like each other next year when she doesnt go to the same school?
don't go behind your friends back! tell her! if she's your friend she'll understand. she had her chance with the guy and it just didn't work out. things like that happen. he likes you, and you like him..right? well what a PERFECT match! it's not often that happens hun, your friend should understand your feelings and get it through her head that it is OVER between her and this guy and that he like you. You should get a chance with him too, your friend is being greedy and i think she's a little jealous and trying to get him back so you can't have him. that's not fair to you OR him, don't stoop to her level, don't go behind her back, just tell her how you feel and if she's really your friend she'll see that you should be with him. i hope i helped a little so you can see what i see. hope it all works out. bye
-ally
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The last day before winter break this 8th grader (he's odd and acts like a freak, butI don't really judge people like that)and his best friend told me on the bus after all of my friends have gotten off that he likes me. I said "That's cool" and went back to my book. The whole week after winter break they were bothering us, but when it got to the wednesday of that week, they were harrassing us. The kid's best friend was the one who was doing the harrassing, but the kid who likes me was just bothering us to annoy us. The kid's best friend was calling us sexy, telling us that he loves us, and he even fell on my ex-best friend. She told the bus driver and it stoppped. the next time we had a substitute bus driver his friend really harrassed us. He sat on my best friend's lap, and then sat on my lap and said things like "give me a kiss". Then I said "you touch me, you die" and he said "i would rather die baby." That got me really pissed off. I pushed him off of my seat and he went into another guy's seat. We got to school and we all got up in the isle. The kid harassing me and my best friend was standing behind me in the isle. He was pushing me forward and I was pushing him back. Then when I pushed him back he grabbed onto me and made me slip and fall on him. My best friend and I reported him and now he can't sit next to or talk to any girl on the bus. The kid that likes me was just bothering us, so we didn't report him. They were both nice to us and talked to us before, but now they hate us and they were harrassing and bothering us. Why do i feel guilty?
i don't know why you feel guilty and that's becuse there is no reason to feel guilty. Those guys were harrassing you and getting to the point of sexual harrassment big time. you couldn't not report them, that's wrong for them to do that. so don't go feeling guilty hun cuz you did exactly the right thing and if all this happens again, do the exact same thing. good luck to you.
--Ally
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Hello.
I have been having really bad luck with guys lately and im getting really tired of it. I dont know what to do because it always seems as if I either get to shy and dont know what to say or i say somthign really stupid. can someone please give me some adive.
o don't worry. of course ur gonna be shy and nervous around a guy. it's not bad luck its just bad timing. when your with a guy just think before you speak so you don't say what you want, run it through your head and make sure its what you want to say and think about what'll happen after you say it but don't take forever in thinking or he might think you are weird or something. and..just relax. take deep breaths, calm down and just have fun. don't be shy becuase from what i've seen in my schoool, guys don't like shy girls, they want nice open and friendly ones. just think before you speak and relax and just have fun. hope i helped ya
--ally
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okay, i met this guy at a party.. and we like held hands and stuff and i think i like him but i'm not sure. we dont go to the same school but i know a lot of people at the school he goes to and everyone says he always talks about me (in a good way) and i dont know what i should do.. i talk to him online sometimes.. and once on hte phone.. im confused?
well, i think you should totally see him more often. call him up and ask to do something. i mean it sounds like the spark is there you just need a little bit more help to flame it up! going to different schools doesn't matter at all! if you get along then hey its all good. and a good side of him going to a different school is he won't get clingy or jealous too easily and you wont get tired of seeing eachother. its nice to want to see someone more than you can. i hope it all works out and that i helped you.
ally
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ok lets see if i can get this right lol...
-does he like me or does he like herr???
---is it me or is it her...or am i really her?
(sry i know this is long)
ok ..im 14/f and one of my best friends is 14/m..he doesnt go to my school...although lives in the district and i seem him here and there...hes been askin me how to ask a girl out..and i kept telling him to be himself..he just wont listen to me on that part advice...
he kepts telling me to put myself in that position..
- i said "no"
- he said "well its not hard 4 u ur a girl"
- i said "its hard 4 us as well..bc we have to turn down guys we dont like"..
i dk how to tell just to be himself..bc he doesnt want to listen to listen when he knows its true...
and he a few days ago he asked me "how do i ask a girl out and not get turned down??"..and im like idk its not something predictable...
-he goes to a private school..and i go to public school..so i have no clue who this girl is..if i did ..i would have asked her if she liked him..but i dk ....so im pointless at this point...-thx
P.S. i asked him way be4 that.."what would you say if i said i liked you" and he said "i dunno" and said well what would your 1st response be if i said i did and he said "u do?" and i said oooo..then he said something or w/e and i said you scare me sometimes and he didnt say anything for 2 mins and i said..."do you care that you do sometimes" and he said "yea"..and i said "how much?" and he said "______________________________________________________________________________"
and i said "ooohh"..then later on the other night on-line what this girls name is and
he said "marissa"
--- when we got into an little argument over what is harder being a girl or being a guy...and he said we have it easier..and when i said "no we dont bc we have to turn down guys who ask us out, i had to do it 5 times" and he said "w/ whoooo?"..like if he was affaird i was taken or something..ahh it drives me insane..-thx again
- i think i already hinted that i liked him...im just not suree if he is affaird to ask me out bc i said i rejected 5 guys-
well......oo that's a tough one but i really think he likes you. that's my opinion of it. I mean, he's always asking YOU how to ask a girl out. Everytime he does you give him the same answer and he doesn't listen so he must not have asked anyone considering he repeated the question you know. With this other girl well..it could be someone he's using to mean as you, she may not exist, she could and he doesn't like you etc..etc..i'm so sorry but i just don't understand much the question was kind of a ramble. If you like this guy you need to go and tell him and ask him if he likes you. Just go right up and say it and don't look embarressed about it at all and don't let him be embarressed either. You will find out once and for all by urself if you are the one he's talking about. Hey even if ur not ask him if he would like to go out i mean you 2 from what i hear seem to be comfortable with eachother. good luck and i really hope i helped but i really had a problem with the question.
lemme know how it works out,
ally
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Ok i have a sister who is a 13 months apart and she drives me crazy...i am so nice to her i let her wear my clothes and i do favors for her but she is just a brat to me any ideas on how to like make her not be such a brat? i dont know she like finds out things about me from my EX and she knows everything and like she wants to tell the world and its quiet annoying....uhhh yeah so any ideas...?
oh my gosh I'm just that close in age with MY sister! everyone would think you'd get along with them but the closer in age the more they are mean! I'm in the same situation right now with my sister since i'm in high school and she's still in middle school. what i do is just ignore what she says and she does get tired of it. You could get dirt on her and take some revenge and it does feel good..at first but later on i'm sure you'll regret it so you might not wanna do it but if you do by all means go for it. there's always the threat: if you don't start being nice i'll stop sharing clothes and doing favors. there's also the i'm gonna have to hurt you or hey there's always ur parents that can deal with that. There's so many options but w/e you do don't hurt her physically or in any way cuz i did that with my sister and it's a good tactic for letting off steam but it doesn't help ur social life whatsoever. ur just grounded for life and THAT'S NOT FUN! i hope you do something good! lemme know how it works out
from, ally
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im 15 and i have a very small penis and im a bit worried does it matter to girls? Will it get bigger?
well....yea it does matter to girls. i'm sure as you get older it will grow with you so i wouldn't worry about it too much. just live your life and don't worry about others cuz some might not care...you never know..hope i helped you. :)
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I watch alot of movies..well..alot of love movies. The movies where ppl fall in love. And the more i watch those movies the more i want that in reality. I want to be in love..does neone else feel that way?
Or am i just stupid for even thinking that :/
I dont just stick with the movies..i read the books too. It's normal to want to replace reality with fiction but its just not gonna happen so ur not stupid at all but lets all remember that reality can be just as good as fiction if we work at it. just dont expect the guys to actually be NICE like in the movies. tty
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Can you tell me wat masterbate means
Yes hun, masterbate means to rub ur genital areas in order to feel good without sex. Like a girl's clitoris and a guy's penis. It's a normal thing, everyone does it and it's nothing to be ashamed of if you decide masturbating is for you. All it is, is rubbing ur outter sexual body parts for pleasure to yourself. Hope i helped :)
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I'm almost 15 years old, and I'm female. I've always been very open about myself. Recently i found myself attracted to both boys AND girls, and I want to be open about it. My parents are very supportive, but how do i make the bashers at school leave me alone, if and when i DO come out to them? I want to show GAY PRIDE!
Well, I have a friend who is bi and a lot of gay and lesbian friends, it's really a common thing tho some people don't see it all that much. A lot of people hate me and my friends cuz they are bi and gay and i don't care. If and when you tell people about yourself you need to realize, people WILL in fact hate you, whether it's right or wrong they will and before you do tell people you need to make sure you'll be able to accept it. All i can say to deal with those people is to keep your head held high and go on with your life. Eventually, they'll go on with theirs. And if they don't, there's always teachers, principals, adult figures in general, If you ever feel even the slightest bit unsafe in your school you go to an adult figure and talk about it. You should always feel safe in school..ALWAYS! I'm glad you wanna tell people about it but you need to make sure you'll be ready for the reactions of people. If you lose friends over it, they were NOT good friends, and hey you probably will i'm like the only friend of my friends who are gay because their other friends sucked. Always be proud of who you are no matter how many people might dislike who you are. Good luck hope i helped. :)
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Hey Im the one that asked the question about talking to the guy I like Well I talked to him today and it went really really well thanks
Thanks for letting me know, i'm glad i helped you. Would you believe i've never had a boyfriend? makes me feel good to give advice that's good even tho i've never experienced it personally..drop me a note anytime.
--ally :)
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