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help i burned her cooter!
ok this is what happening
my parents are out with family friends, and they'll be back any minute so I need your help
heres some background
i volunteer on my cousins softball team (im 17, the girls are 15)
and whatever yea i met this girl, her name is Allison, and we're going out for a while. We have a lot in common, sometimes i help her with her homework. I helped her on an english essay and she still got a C. This is because her teacher is a prick... anywayz
So she came over like an hour ago, and i really want to lose my virginity, so I ask her to have sex
"no i cant its not right" she said but i told her "dont worry i know what im doing, ill be done in like 10 seconds, plus ill give you 2 n64 games if you say yes"
So I gave her diddy kong racing and ken griffey jr baseball, and then she goes to my room. shes a bit confused and scared.
Then i think to myself - yo I need lube right? Cuz I hear you guys on TW saying you need to lube up her clit otherwise it wont fit in properly.
Ok so I have no lube, but i really want to lose my virginity - so i grab some butter from the fridge, but its cold, it wont melt - so i microwaved it for 8 minutes, and then i put it in a glass and poured it on her cooter, now shes saying i burned it.
I don't know what to do, my parents are going to be back any minute and shes crying in the bathroom plz help you guys are really smrat and please help me.
Any idea how to shut her up? Should i give her another n64 game?
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You obviously don't know what your doing your very immature and need to grow up seriously of course you burned her you put something hot on her butter is used for food not to replace lube that's common sense which you lack get her to the hospital you probably damaged her down below you should of let it go and shouldn't of forced her and no you shoudn't give her another game that's just stupid this is probably one of the stupidest things iv'e ever heard...
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Wow! I don't even know where to begin. I give everyone respect on this website, but what you did to this poor girl is so messed up in every way imaginable. You told this girl you'd give her 2 video games if she has sex with you? And you think that's ok? And then you burn her with got butter because you have no lube?
Guys like you should probably have their balls cut off, really. You have no respect for girls whatsoever and why she even wants to talk to you is such a mystery to me, because let me tell you, if I was her, I'd cut your nuts off myself. Grow up.
Haven't your parents taught you anything about respecting girls? People like you really put guys to shame. What you did was so sick and ridiculous, I don't know how you can sleep at night knowing what you did. You owe this girl a thousand apologies.
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Ban inc in 5...4...3...
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You are sick!!! really you sunk really low guy
Shame on you!! Nuff said
next time pour the hot boiling frying oil on your rod first then try to put in into a girl/gal.
You are a little boy trying to pretend to be a man you have no clue on 1. sex 2. women 3. you have got to be making this story up.
Oh and i hope you get busted by your and her parents if this really did happened. I hope you get in trouble. She can get the police involved and i hope she does and sue you and your parents for assualt... first learn how to shower kid before you try sex.
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I think I may love you more than Matt does.
On the off chance this is serious, lube is not to be substituted for butter. You fucked up badly enough for now so you have two options- take her to the emergency room or get her hot again and bake some damn cookies in that shit. I think the first option would be much better for her, but the second would certainly be more rewarding for you.
Oh, in the future, don't trade N64 games for sex. Unequal values there my friend. Those things are going to be worth a lot more one day than your silly virginity.
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I love you.
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Alright. Go take a stick of butter, microwave it for 8 minutes, & then pour it on yourself. See how you feel.
What you did was selfish and stupid. YOU DO NOT BRIBE GIRLS FOR SEX. Why she even agreed to that is beyond me. I mean, at least make it a GOOD deal anyway, not 2 video games.
Uh. You can give her another game if your little heart desires, but you should be APOLOGIZING to her. She didn't do anything wrong, and you're annoyed at her crying because you were too stupid to realize you don't pour practically BOILING butter on someone?! Get over yourself.
I'm done with lectures now.
Obviously clean it up and get her to a doctor.
Nice one.
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OMG DUDE! this is funny but seriously your a dumb ass. you should never have bribbed a girl into sex. If she says no, you DO NOT do this EVER!! I'm sure your still young so keep it in your pants!
As for shutting her up, take her to see a doctor, you could have seriously hurt her.
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you could have seriously hurt her.... and you dont ever try to convince a girl to have sex with you. she should completely want it. sex isnt all about the guy its about enjoying the intimacy that two people share hen their in love and preferably married. never ever try and bribe a girl with a game. and you should be in a serious committed relationship before you have sex. and youll be lucky if you dont get into all kinds of trouble preying on an innocent girl. plus you may have seriously injured her.
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Are you serious? You wanted to lose your virginity so bad that you were willing to bribe someone into it & then hurt them? And now you want to "shut her up?" You should NEVER have sex!
Send her to the hospital. It may not be a serious burn, but it's still a burn so she needs to be medically treated. And you should foot the bill since it's your fault she needs to see a doctor.
Keep it in your pants. Bribing for sex isn't a good idea. Clearly you don't know what you're doing because if you did, you'd know butter is a food, not a lubrication.
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omg i have no helpfull advise but thats
the funniest thing iv ever heard.
wow ugh ice it lol?
search your house for pain killers.
damn dude really your probably going to
have to just tell ur parents the worlds most akward story
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