about



"Be soft. Do not let the world make you hard. Do not let the pain make you hate. Do not let the bitterness steal your sweetness. Take pride that even though the rest of the world may disagree, you still believe it to be a beautiful place."



I'm an optimist. I can find the beauty in anything. I'm creative. I love spontaneity, peace, & parties. I'm the farthest thing from shy. There's not one person on this earth that I don't care about. I like deep conversations, change, & random acts of kindness. Every emotion I feel is ten times as strong as yours. I have alot of empathy for other people. I'm real open minded & liberal. All I want to do is make at least one person's life a little easier. :D


advice

I've known this guy for about two weeks or so, and recently we've been talking a bit more than we normally do. Well, he told me I was boring. Yes, it's offensive to a point, but I'm afraid that I may come across as boring. When I first start talking to a person I'm not totally comfortable, so I can't think of anything to say, but I don't want to bore him away before I get a chance to become comfortable.

When I'm with my friends I can be very talkative, but I'm just awful at coming up with things to talk about. My conversations always involve a lot of awkward silences. It's awful. =(

Any advice on what to say/do or conversation starters, etc.?

Dude, I never run out of things to talk about. I can start up a conversation with anyone about anything. You just gotta learn to think less and say more. :D Or maybe I'm just impulsive. That's probably it, but anyway.

Things to talk about:
-How you're somewhat shy.
-How you start talking more once you get to know someone better.
-Your taste in music, his taste in music.
-Favorite songs, favorite bands.
-Your day, his day.
-Your weekend, his weekend.
-School, teachers, work.
-Your opinion on drugs, alcohol, etc.
-Favorite movies, new movies that are out.
-Mutual friends, mutual enemies.
-Your family, his family.
-Your problems, his problems.
-Talk about hanging out.
-Volunteering, clubs, sports.
-Finals.
-What you like to do, what he likes to do.
-What you've gone through, what he's gone through.
-What you're doing for Christmas break, what he's doing for christmas break.

You've just gotta be opinionated. Don't worry if he thinks you're "weird." He won't, it shows confidence. Just be open. It won't be viewed as weird. It'll just be thought of as friendly. :D

Good luck! Hope I helped!

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16, F

Hey :)

I noticed that you're really optimistic, and I admire you so much for that even though I've never met you. I always try to look on the bright side of things, like you, and I always try to remember the good aspects of my life. Like every teenager, I've faced hard times, stress, and I think at one point, mild depression (I'd cry myself to sleep every single night for a week), but now I've realized that I've come to this world for a reason and life is simply too short to be sad.

I was just wondering... how do you stay happy and look at the bright side all the time? I mean, compared to most people, I'm happy, but sometimes I do get sad, like yesterday I cried because I was stressed out. I have always wanted to meditate so that my emotions aren't so strong and have desired the ability to step back from situations and see the good in it, but I still cry sometimes.

What do you do when you're faced with a bad situation? How do you escape? One of my greatest interests include dream interpretation and philosophy. I once read that dreams are a passage into the fourth dimension so this is how I escape. Do you meditate or do yoga or anything? Do you have any suggestions for how I can be happy more often and not be really happy and then be really sad?

Thank you for your time! :)

P.S.- I saw your answer about three beautiful things in the world. More people should be like you. You've inspired me.

Awww, thank you so much! You seriously just made my day. :D

You sound like you're very strong. Depression, no matter how "mild" it may seem, is one of the most difficult things to overcome. I used to have very severe depression myself, but I'm allll better now!

I just can't see the bad in anything honestly. I can, but I just force myself to ignore it. I just don't see the point in focusing on the bad when there's so much good out there.
Okay. The next time you catch yourself complaining or say something anything but positive, stop yourself dead in the thought or sentence. Change it to something positive, like what a pretty day it is, how cute someone's outfit is, how glad you are that you have no homework in a certain subject, how thankful you are for something/someone, etc.

Everyone gets sad, sweetie. There would be something very wrong if you didn't. It's just your perspective on things. I've had to work very hard to change mine. I see the good in people, simply because I wouldn't want someone to look at me and pick out every flaw possible. I see the good in every situation just because I've learned to take the time to look for it, because it's always there. You can over-analyze and worry about a situation for hours, but in the end, all you've resulted in doing is caused yourself twice as much stress, tears, and regrets. The second you find yourself getting sad, just tell yourself to stop.

Nope, I don't do yoga or anything. I totally don't have the flexibility for that. I'm faced with a bad situation everyday. I live with an abusive father, but I would never let it show. I escape by helping other people. I want to inspire someone. I want to change someone's life, to make a difference. That's why I come on this site. People like you honestly keep me the way I am. This is my escape, along with music. When I'm upset, I listen to some really calming music. For me, it's like, John Mayer or the Dave Matthews Band. I'll go for a walk, read quotes, draw, paint, color. I love painting and drawing. It can really take your mind off of things. You should really try it. There's no rules, instructions, nothing. You're free to do whatever you like. That's why I love it so much. Quotes are also really good. When you find one that fits whatever situation or emotion you're feeling, it lets you know that you're not alone in the world, that there's someone else out there you can relate to.

Is there something you're really passionate about? Do that. If there's nothing you can think of, you have to find something. That's what you need to do. I love helping. So, that's what I do. Making people happy makes me happy. :D

"Do not place happiness in things outside of yourself; people move on and cities burn. Instead, try to find joy in yourself. Find passion in simple things. Look in the mirror and see the most beautiful human being of all staring back at you. Do what you love and do not let another manipulate your peace of mind. Above all, learn to love yourself. Learn to be okay when you are alone. Realize that nothing worthwhile comes overnight."

I'm not sure if I helped you too much, but I hope I did! :D

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I don't know if this is in the right catorgory or not(sorry if it isn't).

I was wondering if i can get Revitol Hair Removal Cream in canada?
I've looked it up but can't seem to find it anywhere. And if i can get it in canada would it be in walmart?

I live in the US and I can't even find it in Walmart, so I don't think it'd be where you are either.

I've never been able to find it in stores, but try just ordering it online! It'll take about 10-21 days for it to come in though. Just grab a credit card (your parents or yours) and go here:
http://www.revitol.com/site/hair_removal_cream/

Hope I helped! :D

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K im really confused and need like serious help so here goes

k so i saw this guy in the 8th grade im now in the 11th grade and ever since i saw him and talked to him maybe a few times in grade 9 but only cuz he was sitting beside me in english and we wuld jus causually talk and well i cant stop thinking about him i mean ever since grade 8 i cant think of any other guy then him i dont know why im not even close to him or know him or really talk to him and now i dont talk to him at all because i dont go to his school anymore because i moved after grade 9 to a new skool only about a half hour away from my old school and i still cant stop thinking about him i feel like im going crazy i dont know why i want to get to know him and hang out with him and i really feel crazy because i really dont think theres a such thing as love at first site and honestly i dont think he wuld be interested im not that pretty and ya but hes tall and im tall and my friends go to the same skool as him and a few know him well and stuff and the wierdist thing is he has the same last name as my brothers first name which i dont think means anything and i know this all seems confusing and crazy and makes probably no sense at all but i need help wuts going on why cant i get him out of my head plzz help me or i seriously think im gonna go crazy

Sounds like you like him. (:

Ask for his number and just start casually texting him or add him on facebook/myspace.

Go run, walk, listen to music, etc. Do something to take your mind off him for now.

Relaaax, girl. :D

Good luck!

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Alright so I am on the depo provera shot for about 3 weeks or so. It is right around the time of my normal period. Last night i noticed i had very light pink discharge. I know that can be a early sign of pregnancy but i really do not think i am because when ever I've had sex while on the shot we used a condom or he pulled out. Could this pink discharge just be a result of the hormonal changes from the shot? I'm concerned...

A lot of people get that kind of discharge while on it. A doctor actually told my friend that the shot can imitate pregnancy once.

You're not pregnant. Don't worry!

Hope I helped. :D

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Does anyone know where to get a gloomy beeear ?
I live in Stroudsburg, PA.
Anywhere close ? (:
Thaaanks

It's a pretty small company so I don't think you're gonna be finding any stores nearby, but you can order it online. They'll have a bigger selection there anyway. You just gotta borrow your mom/dad/whoever's credit card if you don't have one and you're all set. It shouldn't take more than 2 weeks for it to come in. :D
http://www.gloomybearstore.com/

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okay, so i'm really shy and quiet when i'm around people i don't know very well. i usually have a habit of looking at the ground when i walk, and i have a hard time opening up to people because i'm afraid of being rejected. but it seems like certain people (in certain situations or places almost everyone), almost hate me before even knowing me because of it. i've heard that sometimes shy people can come-off as being stuck-up or snotty, but it's not like if somebody smiles at me i won't smile back, i'm very friendly as long as other people are first so i won't feel like they might reject me... if that makes sense. when i think of stuck-up people, i usually think of people who walk around thinking they're better than everybody else, constantly pointing out people's flaws, mean and cruel in general to other people even if they don't know them. i don't think i'm like that at all. i love people i just don't have a very high self esteem so it's hard for me to open up, and i wait for other people to smile or say hi first, then i will back. what should i do? is it me or them?

Aw, I used to be SO shy! So trust me, I know how you feel.

First of alllll, do you get anxious/uncomfortable in social situations? Cause if you do, that's social anxiety, and they can give you some medicine for that and you'll be all better. That's what I had to do--I take Lexapro--and now I'm as happy as ever! :D

It's not them. It's just how you are, but you shouldn't be ashamed of that! You just have a low self-esteem. I've never considered someone shy as suck-up, although I've heard that too. I don't think most people do that. I think most people, when they see someone shy, just assume that you don't want to talk so they don't bother. I'm sure no one hates you, sweetie. They just don't know what to say to you. Like, they think you just don't wanna talk to them so they feel awkward, you know?
You've just gotta open up! Most people are actually really nice; you've just gotta gather up some courage and start up a converstion. Ask them how to do something with the homework or classwork if you can't think of anything else. They won't think you're weird or anything, so don't worry! They'll just think you're friendly, which is a very good thing.

Hope I helped! :D

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What are 3 good things about our world?

1. Love.
I'm not talking about boy-girl love. Just love. The love you have for your friends and the love they have for you. The love you have for your family and the love they have for you in return.

2. Beauty.
The world's beautiful. The sound of waves crashing in an ocean, the clear blue skys on sunny days, rainbows after a storm, the sun still breaking through the clouds on a dark & stormy day, leaves fading from green to red in autumn.

3. Emotions.
The butterflies in your stomach when you see someone you like, having passion about something you truely care about, optimism, the rush of adrenaline when you take a risk, compassion, laughter, surprise, excitement, the ability to be so happy you feel like you're about to burst, foregiveness, having hope when everything seems hopeless, the ability to love, inspiration.

4. Hope.
"If you can look at the sunset and smile, then you still have hope. If you can see the good in other people, then you still have hope. If you meet new people with a trace of excitement and optimism, then you still have hope. If you give people the benefit of the doubt, then you still have hope. If the suffering in others still fills you with pain, then you still have hope. If you still watch love stories or want endings to be happy, then you still have hope. If you can look at the past and smile, then you still have hope. If, when faced with bad and told everything is futile, you can still look up at the end of the conversation and say "yeah, but..." then you still have so much hope. If you still offer your hand of friendship to those who have touched your life, then you still have hope. If you refuse to let a friendship die or accept that it must end, then you, very much, still have hope."

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Basicly I have fallen in love with songs like "your guardian angel" by red jumpsuit apparatus, "passing afternoon" and "Sodom south georgia" by iron & wine, "slow dancing in a burning room" by John Mayer, "broken" by seethed and Amy lee, "beauty in a car crash" by flight 409, "great companion" by Landon pigg.. Ect.
But now I really need a lot more new songs like these to listen to because I'm starting to get tired of them. Pretty much any slow song or a song with beautiful guitar or harmony would be great.
Here are some of my favorite bands if it helps:
John mayer, iron & wine, switchfoot, fleet foxes, blue October, train, coldplay, relient k, and a lot more.
Anything related to those and something unique would be wonderful..
Thanks(:

I'm in love with those songs too! You have a really good taste in music. :D

Let You Down - Dave Matthews Band.
On Your Porch - The Format.
Smile - Uncle Cracker.
Angels - Augustana.
Not Alone - Augstana. (You'll love anything by them I bet)
The Fear You Won't Fall - Joshua Radin. (I think you'll love anything by Joshua Radin)
Only Hope - Switchfoot.
Sleeping Sickness - City and Colour.
I Love You Anyways - Travis. (They're alot like Coldplay if you wanna listen to some songs by them)
Crash Into Me - Dave Matthews Band.
Hard Sun - Eddie Vedder.
Fever Dream - Iron and Wine.
Ever So Sweet - The Early November.
Existentialism On Prom Night - Straylight Run.
Breathe Me - Sia.
Somebody's Me - Enrique Iglesias.
The Past and Pending - The Shins.
Glitter In The Air - Pink.
Dear Mr. President - Pink.
Happiness - Fray.
Perfectly - Five Times August.
Loro - Pinback.
Colorblind - Counting Crows.
Cape Canaveral - Conor Oberst.
Breathe In Breathe Out - Mat Kearney. (Alot of his songs are really slow)
Overkill - Colin Hay.
A Lack of Color - Death Cab for Cutie.
She Talks to Angels - The Black Crowes.

Hopefully you'll find at least something from all that? Haha.

Hope I helped! :D

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Ok so i have a gf. Btw 14/m

I wanna hang out with her at like my house or her house. She doesn't want to hang out at her house for w/e reason in not totally sure. So she asked if she could come over sometime. I said yes. But im jw is it normal for me to not want her to come meet my parents because idk how they would act and it would be first time i had a gf over. Also i don't really like how my house looks like because idk i didn't pick out how it should look inside is this normal too?

She doesn't wanna hang out at her house cause she thinks her parents'll embarrass her or somethin, trust me. The reason why you don't want her to meet your parents is why she doesn't want you at her house. Haha, she's worried about the same thing.

It's totally normal. You don't want them to embarrass you or creep on ya'll the whole time. Most people your age feel the same way too.

Yeah, that's normal too. She knows you didn't pick it out. She won't care. She just wants to spend time with you.

Haha, just relax.
Hope I helped. :D

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okay, so i'm just going to describe myself and preferably guys but girls can also answer. i'm almost 5'4, more like 5'3 and 3/4, kind of skinny (like in my arms and unfortunately my chest) but where my hips and butt are i get wider. i take care of myself really well as far as hygiene, and i try to make sure my clothes, skin, everything is always clean and smells good. i have clear skin as far as acne, pimples, etc. and it's soft but i have freckles on my nose & cheeks and moles covering my body. :( they're not big and huge and hairy or anything like that, they're actualy kind of small, but i still worry about them. anyways, brunette, wavy hair, kind of pointy-ish nose... some people say it compliments my face, but i'm self-conscious about it. hazelish-brown eyes, and i don't wear a whole lot of makeup because i don't like the feeling of it really. i just wear a little eyeliner on my lower lids and mascara, and my eyelashes are dark naturally cause of my hair. i actually kind of like my eyes and some people have told me they're pretty, it's one of the only things i sometimes like about myself. anyways, what i'm most self-conscious about is my chest. it's almost non-existant and it's desgusting. i'm thinking of getting surgery when i'm older if they don't develop by the time i'm like 18-20, not so they're like playboy-model huge but just normal-looking. so, over-all, even if maybe i don't get surgery and do end up developing more, do you think someone might find me attractive? or are the things i don't like about myself a total turn-off?

I'm sure alot of people find you attractive!
You're like the perfect height. Guys think short girls are so cute. Plus you have a great shape from what it sounds like. All of my friends who have freckles hate it, but every guy I ask thinks they're adooorable! Most people DO have alotta little moles. Hazel eyes are really cool in my opinion. If you wore a tad more make up it'd make 'em stand out more though. Try doing eyeliner on the top lid too and like a TINY bit of dark-ish brown eye shadow. That's what I wear and everyone always notices my eyes. Your hair sounds gorgeous. If you ever wanna switch it up some, try scrunching, crimping, straightening, or curling it. As for your chest, don't stress, girl. You haven't said your age, but I bet you'll end up developing more and it'll be fine. Push up bras are a girl's best friend. Hahaha, seriously, go to Victoria's Secret. I love theirs. I think a smile is what makes someone beautiful. No matter how you're feelin' that day, try and throw on a smile. (:

Honestly sweetie, you're too hard on yourself. I don't think anyone would find anything about you a turn-off at all. Don't stand in front of the mirror picking every flaw out about yourself. You sound gorgeous and I'm sure I'm not the only one who thinks that. Look in the mirror and the second you find yourself focusing on what you consider a flaw, just tell yourself to stop. Focus on the good. Focus on how clear your skin is, how silky your hair is, etc. Before you walk through the doors at school, just remind yourself how pretty you are. Eventually you'll believe it, cause trust me, you are.

Hope I helped! :D

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Ouch!! Advice?
'Look, I know you like me... It's pretty obvious. And I really really don't like you. So you should get over me.'
I don't even like this guy.

Uh, make him feel like the dumbass that he is.

Text him back and be like, "Look, I know you think I like you... It's pretty obvious. And I really really don't like you. So you should get over yourself. :D"

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hey everyone, this is a weird yet stupid question. I really wanna be able to stay in a hospital room for like a week or two. But i dont know what to do to make me end up there for a health reason thats not painful... any ideas

Go to the ER & tell them what you just told us.

You'll be in a psych ward in no time.

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I was drinking last night and got really, really smashed. I know, I was being very stupid by drinking SO much. Anyway, I was at a party and I know this guy was really hitting on me and trying to get in my pants all night long. I was grinding on him some and we were making out. I'll admit that I remember him sliding his hand down my pants and fingered me for just like a few minutes, but I was really, really horny so I KNOW I totally let him do that to me because it feels good.
I'm a virgin though and I want to save myself for marriage and I kept telling him no to putting his penis in me but he kept trying to persuade me. Anyway, I ended up passing out sometime and woke up without most of my clothes on (I only had on my thong panties). It wouldn't have been a big deal but it was like someone had taken off my underwear and put them back on me? I can't be for sure.
Anyway, my loser friends weren't there to take care of me and now I'm worried that the guy succeeded and we did have sex. I called the loser "friends" and they told me crap about me screaming at them a lot to leave me alone with the guy. I know I didn't do that because I'm not that kind of person so they have to be making that up. They are probably too stupid to just tell me the truth that they don't care if I have sex or not. One of the loser friends told me that the last time she saw me I was with the guy and his pants were down and I was giving him head. I PROBABLY did do that because I usually give some really hott guy head at the parties I go to. This guy was WAY hott too. I don't remember that this time though.
Today I'm not bleeding or anything but I have before when I fingered myself and masturbated with things so I think I had already ripped my hymen out. How can I tell if I'm still a virgin? Do I need to see a doctor to find out? Is there actually a way? Should I find out the guy's name and take him to court because he totally took advantage of me last night?! I'm furious if he did have sex with me because I totally didn't say yes to that!

"They are not there to baby you or make sure you're okay. Yes, it'd be nice if they did but the world is dog eat dog. It's every man or woman for themselves so the sooner you realize that the better."
^ Please DON'T realize that. There's good people out there. You obviously expected your friends to do the right thing and watch out for you since they knew you were smashed because you would do that for them if you were in their place.

ANYWAY. You don't need lectures on the fact that you should stop drinking so much. You already stated that you know you were being very stupid by letting yourself drink so much. Be careful with the reputation you're giving yourself though.

Talk to everyone at the party. Ask them if they saw anything or know what happened. Ask around & find out the guy's name. Ask him if ya'll had sex or not. Don't be accusing or he may not tell you the truth. That's the only way to know for sure.
If he says yes or if you think he's lying, then it would still be hard to tell. Go get a rape kit if there's still even the slightest doubt in your mind.
If you wanna know more about what they are, here ya go: http://www.wisegeek.com/what-is-a-rape-kit.htm

Good luck!

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13 year old boy in melbourne looking for a girl around carnigie or chadstone friedship or more

You're at the wrong site, dude.

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There's this cute guy I like. The thing is, we're not that close yet. Do you think I should add him on Facebook already or just wait for him to do it or until we're close?



xoxo

Add him.

What's the worst that could happen? Nothing. :D

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my friend copies everything i do. like, i will make up a word and she will use it all the time after she hears me say it. or i will wear sweats to school and the next day she will wear sweats. my mom said don't look at it in a negative way look at is as she looks up to you but i hate it! my outfits are my style and i dont want anyone taking it. nobody reply "just talk to her and tell her how you feel" because she is the kind of person where you can freak out on her and she will just laugh or she will change her attitude that day and then go back to her normal self the next. help, please! im at wits end!

Keep changing your style and confuse the shit out of her. Then when she gives up, go back to your old style. Hahahaha, you probably won't do that, but it'd be hilarious to see how pissed off she got.

Um, this is hard. Sometimes people just end up accidently taking each other's words and crap just cause they're around each other so much.
Just take a "break" from her. Hang out with other people for a while.

Always workssss. :D

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ok. so i've been with my girlfriend for a very long time now and everything has been to good to be true up until recently. about 2 months ago she cheated on me while she was drunk and i was out of town. i caught her the next day when i saw the hickey on her neck. now im constantly thinking about that and i love her to much to end it. (blah blah blah, theres plenty of other fish in the sea, dont even tell me that im tired of hearing it". but today i've also come to realize that he may have given her an std which i too now have i think.... and still i love her to much to break up with her. so i just want to know. does anyone else think im being a dumbass about it all? you can be honest. i would love to hear it.. it would actually make me feel better to know that we love each other to much and even though she genuinely regrets it and is sorry for ever being stupid enough to risk our relationship, im still being stupid with my decision about to stay with her.

First off, go to the doctor if you think you have an STD. Seriously.

You don't sound like a pushover. You sound like a good guy. Please don't end up like the person below me, like dictating who she can and can't hang out/talk to. That's ridiculous.
Everyone deserves a second chance in my opinion, no matter what they've done or who they've hurt.
When you're drunk, your judgement is affected. She wasn't thinking clearly. That's an excuse, but it's a good one. If she regrets it, don't hold it against her. She knows she messed up and I'm betting she would give anything to take it all back. She's probably walking on eggshells anytime she's around you. Forgive her, but don't forget.

You said it yourself; everything's been great up until now. Why throw it all away over one mistake?

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15-F

So this girl text harassed me on Saturday.
She got my number from another girl and started texting me saying I was a
Poser.
Bitch.
Effed up.
Two faced.

I locked every one of her texts and I replied to every one but like three with 'K.'
No today, Tuesday, she was talking to a few people I know and I walked by with a friend, she says to the group of people
"God I want to beat the shit out of her"
Ect, ect. So I have a few witnesses.
Now tomorrow I'm going to my school principal about her.
What kind of trouble could she get in?

Go to the store where you got your phone and ask how to block numbers. Then block hers.
Don't ever respond to her texts, even with just a "K". That's all she wants, to know that you read them. It'll drive her CRAZY if she doesn't know rather you got them or not.

Is ALL of this happening at school? If it's not, the principal can be lame and say it's not his problem cause it's not taking place on school property. Happened to me before. I was so pissed.
But your principal most likely won't do that.

As for how much trouble she'll get in, it depends on how strict your school is about "bullying". Most schools'll take it pretty serious. They'll at least call her parents. Probably administrative detention or ISS. It really all depends on the school & how serious your principal takes it.

Good luck :D

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i have been dating my beu for a year and a month and was wondering what i can do to surprise him and rekindle our romance a little?
like sexy ideas for us
and nice gifts or something?
or a good movie we can watch that will make us look at eachother and realise how in love we are? like the notebook but weve seen that a lot so any others? lol

A promise ring! :D

Movies:
A WALK TO REMEMBER!
Ps I love you.

Best movies ever.

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