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Bully in the neighborhood
My 12 year old son has been bullied by a boy in our neighborhood for several years now. My son has a lot of friends, but of course all his friends are around his age and scared of the bully.
The bully (Gary) is 15. A few years ago my husband and I talked to Gary's parents, because he stole a toy from my son on the school bus. Gary claimed not to have the toy, and his parents protected him--and said we were in the wrong. This only child is perfect according to them. I have given up on going to the parents. The attitude of the police is "boys will be boys" (we live in a small town).
I caught Gary in the act a couple of weeks ago. He jumped on, and broke a ramp that my son and his friends built for their bikes. I told him he was acting like a 6 year old, and that someday someone bigger and meaner will come along and "take him out". He rode off on his bike in a hurry! However now he harasses my son about telling "Mommy". Last night he threw big rocks at my son's bike, causing some damage to paint. Apparently it even makes things worse if I interfear. Usually I do leave it to my son to settle disagreements, but this boy has crossed the line.
My 21 year old son, is 6'4, 240 lbs but If I use him to intimidate the 15 year old, this would be no different than a 15 year old picking on a 12 year old. Although...I doubt Gary has paid much attention to big brother. He'd probably be scared of him, we all know Gary is a coward in disguise.
My son does not want to walk away, because this means he would have to leave his other friends behind, plus he wants to "look tough" Any tips on dealing with a neighborhood bully?
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I'm about your sons age and I know how it is with bullys. Boys like to fight fire with fire and win, girls too, and not seem like a chicken who can't stand up for himself/herself. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't help your son. I bet if you found a way to scare Gary then he'll steer clear from your son. Maybe he's afraid of a certain animal or bug. If so tell your son about it more than likely he'll think of a way to use it to his advatage. Then if Gary's parents think it was him say that your son would never do something like that. Just like they think of Gary. Or move. Not far, just far enough to get away from him. Act like you just got a job promotion somewhere. That way it won't look like your running because of him, because it'll just make him think more highly of himself.
Hope I helped.
~~~~~~~~hailey~~~~~~~~
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As a child and Youth worker for 12 years I have seen my fair share, well more then my fair share, of bullies. Usually with bullies the bullying is just the tip of the iceburg they are often involved in borderline illegal activities, trouble at school etc... Also he had to learn this behavior somewhere, looking at the reaction of the parents I would assume that it is the father. Seeing as the parents believe there child is perfect I would video tape incidents involving their son, I would then offer to show it to them prior to showing it to a lawyer because their son is causing mental anguish, or before you show the police. The courts take bullying very seriously especially since Colombine.
Good Luck to you, I hope this helps.
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hey xx
Being bullied is nasty and people that are getting bullied are scared of them. Getting your other son to intimidate Gary isnt setting a very good example to others. Garys parents have the attitude that its ok and Garys mum and dad havent bought up Gary very well in my opinion.
The next step could be talking to the head of the school or driving your child to school and picking him up. Also asking the head teacher to ask other teachers to keep an eye on Gary and your child may help the situation.
mwah xxxxxxxxx
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The only thing that I can think of as of now is to file a restraining order and if it continues take this to court and let the bully get crimial charges. It's unfair, yes, but there isnt much else that you can do. I would try this and see how it works. Best of luck.
-Keosha
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WELL WHAT I THINK IS THAT ALL OF YOUR SON'S FRIEND AND HIM GANG HIM UP AND BEAT HIM UP, AND SHOW HIM A LESSON. AND I KNOW DOING A WRONG DOS'NT MAKE A RIGHT, BUT START TO STABATRAGE HIS STUFF BUT DO IT ON THE SLICK.
hope i help, and if there's anything you need an advice on yoou can call on me and also bacause i dont got nobody asking me notfin
EbOnY =]
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i think you should either let your son and his freinds gang up on this dude and beat him up(and when his parents ask deny it like they did) or let your older son beat him up although hes older what goes around comes around and since he bullys someone younger then him then he needs a taste of his own medicine when my lil bro gets bullied or anyone as much as BOTHERS him i go beat them up or bully them hope i helped
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the simple answer would be to fight back. and it doesn't have to be physically either. Tactics and strategies come into play here. The saying 'safety in numbers' come to play in here. If your son and his friends make sure there are at least two people together at one time, it would be harder for the bully to pick on, right? Also, your son should try standing up to the bully and even though standing up might lead to worse results, it doesnt hurt to try right?
if my advice was really bad, here are some websites that might help:
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
[Link](Mouse over link to see full location)
these are just some... if you want to find more, you can go to google.com and type in 'dealing with bullies'.
hope i helped!
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I think you should have your son throw rocks at that 15 year olds bike so he would know how it feels. and you should send his parents a bill for the damamge he did to your son's bike and if i was you i would use the older brother to scare the 15 year old away he needs to be taught a lesson!!! tel lyour son to tell him what goes around comes around and one day what he did to him will happen to him and you will laugh all over his face!!! i hate bullies they make me so angry. i noticed that bullies always pick on younger kids then them because they know they really can't do anything. why dont you teach your son some karate lessons so he can beat that boys butt!!!!
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uhh teach your son some martial arts and let him beat the 15 year old up. Yes that is a joke.
You could go all psycho analytical but that doesnt work on idiots.
Your older son is too old to be in this. Ask your son to ask some of the older kids, you know the other 15 year olds to make fun of this 15 year old for picking on younger kids. That might end it.
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The child's parents are no help and the cops are no help, so time to take matters into your own hands. I assume you bought that bike. That would seriously piss me off whith that little spawn of satan child throwing rocks and messing up the paint on it. Next time his bike is near your son, have him throw rocks at it. To each his own as they say. That might seem childish but really what else is there? He needs to see how it feels and yes if I had another son (the 21 year old) I would def. use him at my advantage to scare the 15 year old into leaving my other son alone. If all esle fails, time to get nasty with the parents and send them a bill for any damages his son did & tell them to keep there son away from your son and your property. You may not can do anything about the boy in general but you can charge him with tresspassing if he comes onto your property. Go buy a No Tresspassing sign and put it up.
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