13/f, my grandmother used to be okay, never used to get into my way, always feeding us, and helping us. I went to this award banquet, and she didn't like what I was wearing. When she described what I should wear, it was a wedding dress. I explained that for this occasion, you just wear simple things, but she didn't listen. I went the way I looked anyhow. Everyone who passed us, she would say, you see how that person has that... and other what nonsense. She said how my breasts were sticking out. Bra or no bra, of course it would show, I have breasts, wouldn't the shape and size of it show? Now for graduation, she's forcing to dress up in some wedding gown thing. My mom had to tell her no. My grandmother thinks that I'm dressing the wrong way. What's her problem?
She just has her head up in the 50's. She remembers what she used to wear. Obviously, she hasn't left her house and gone out into the fashion world since then. She thinks that you kids probably still wear the clothing she used to wear. Ignore her.
SHINYTOYGUNSx3 answered Tuesday June 20 2006, 12:01 pm: well..alot of grandmas are like this. they live in there generation, and see it their way and no one elses. she doesnt have a problem, she just doesnt approve of how you dress, and is probably ashamed of it. but u shouldnt be, b/c if you think you look fine, it shouldnt matter about anyone else.
DefinedEyes answered Sunday June 18 2006, 10:29 pm: Your grandma probably is living in her world, of what life used to be like when she was that age. She is old, and I dont think she has realized how much the world has changed, and how modern it has become. You know? I kind of feel bad for her though, since it sounds like she doesnt understand.
Helpful answered Sunday June 18 2006, 4:42 pm: Your Grandma was raised differently than you were and it sounds like she's trying to help you out, whether or not she really is. Maybe, to aviod argument, you should try to wear things that she will accept more easily around her. Grandmothers are pretty stubborn. Hope I helped! [ Helpful's advice column | Ask Helpful A Question ]
lulabelle answered Sunday June 18 2006, 2:48 pm: Answer to second question at the bottom.
When I was your age you had to (if a girl) dress up wearing a girddle w/stockings, your best dress shoes and a dress w/ white gloves just to go into the downtown area. I remember the first time I saw someone wearing a pair of blue jeans in the downtown area I thought how strange they looked. Things are definately different now for better or worse. I sometimes think people take things a little far, but I also am a believer in personal expression. Just because I don't think it looks all that great doesn't mean it doesn't. Your grandmother is just remembering a time when people dressed for certain occassions. To be honest it was fun at the time and I think she doesn't want you to miss out on this. It's ashame she is so closed minded in this area though. I don't see the harm in her suggesting them, but she should be understanding if you don't choose her suggestions. Sometimes people can't get out of their heads. What I do when my mother is like this is ignore her. I let her say whatever she wants and I nod my head, say ok alot, and then go ahead and do whatever I want. Don't argue w/her, let your mother do that. It only causes stress for you and her to argue w/her. As long as your mother doesn't have a problem w/how you dress I wouldn't worry about her. Your grandmother doesn't really have any power over you, just your mother and father. They are the ones who make the decisions that affect your life. But to keep peace, let your grandmother say whatever she wants, keep quiet,do whatever you want, and enjoy life. Don't let these insignificant little glitches bogg you down. Good luck and happy life!
Namaste!
LULABELLE
In answer to your question as to if I'm Hindu or not:
In a way I am. I follow the teachings of Paramahansa Yogananda. In his teachings he also incorporates the teachings of Jesus Christ as a great Yogi and Master. I go to his temple here in Atlanta. I have most of his writings and have read his most famous book, "Autobiography of a Yogi", if you ever have a chance to read it I think you'll find it facinating. I believe all religions are manificatations of ONE, who was simply trying to reach us all through our many cultures, which is why there are so many views on how to reach the same goal. I believe all the religions of the world are right and I believe all of the religions of the world are wrong. Yin and Yang. Now if only we could join forces rather than seperate ourselves we would be able to accomplish things more beautiful than we could ever imagine.
soccergurlie1220 answered Sunday June 18 2006, 2:07 pm: The clothes and styles in todays world are defintaly not how they were when your Grandma was young. Who knows maybe she still thinks girls should still dress like that. Or her other "problem" may be you. She see her granddaughter is growing up. Wearing things that reveal her body, that might make her uncomfortalbe because she wants you to stay a little girl. But what you could do to help the situtaion is have her come shopping with you and your mother and ask her for help to look for a dress and then if she finds a dress that she likes but you hate try it on and just tell her it doesn't fit and its hard to move around in (even if it isn't she won't know)
ihateu answered Sunday June 18 2006, 1:50 pm: i would just ignor her because my grandmother is the same way and i just ignor her shes not your mother so why should she tell you what to wear and maybe shes just jealous that you look way more prettier then she ever was lol
xogiggles37xo answered Sunday June 18 2006, 1:49 pm: grandparents are like that. they always think their right. the way they think is the right way and nothing else is. all i can say is your going to have to tatke little comments and stuff from your grandmother and have your mom help you along the way when your grandmother forces you to do something. [ xogiggles37xo's advice column | Ask xogiggles37xo A Question ]
Chika answered Saturday June 17 2006, 10:59 pm: she's just still living in the old dayys
she just doesnt get the time change comes with style change.
Its not her fault she's old now is it?? [ Chika's advice column | Ask Chika A Question ]
TheHeadHonchoPoncho57 answered Saturday June 17 2006, 7:56 pm: I would just pay no attention to her. She doesn't have the authority. Your mom is your sole
guardian; she can tell your grandma that you're not going to wear a wedding gown.
About the breasts. Back in the 20's, girls with completely flat chests and slim, boyish bodies were considered very attractive. Girls had to confine their breasts, so as not to enhance any "sexual parts." That was the culture back then. Ignore her.
Girls had to wear dresses to everything back then. She's old-fashioned, and she can't see that styles have changed. Your mom, fortunately, hasn't sided with your grandmother, and you can wear what you want. No big deal. Just tell your mother not to have your grandmother come along next time you go somewhere. [ TheHeadHonchoPoncho57's advice column | Ask TheHeadHonchoPoncho57 A Question ]
kallan answered Saturday June 17 2006, 7:46 pm: That's just kinda the way grandparents are! they are from a totally different time when girls wore skirts and dresses and guys were always gentlemen around girls, so the way your grandma is acting is normal. I hope this answers your question. [ kallan's advice column | Ask kallan A Question ]
queenhearts answered Saturday June 17 2006, 7:17 pm: It was just the way she was brought up. Her way of dressing "appropriate" is a lot different from today. If she wanted you to dress in some gown, she probably thought it was really special and important today. But it's your body and clothes, so just don't listen to her. She just wanted you to look "special, good" like other people. [ queenhearts's advice column | Ask queenhearts A Question ]
emoguitarchick21 answered Saturday June 17 2006, 5:03 pm: Tell your grandma things have changed in the world today. And don't really listen to her about it. Ignore it, tell her you like wearing what's in. even if she says "well if everyone jumped off a bridge you'd do it too?" Just say causual.. "I'm not everyone." and walk away. [ emoguitarchick21's advice column | Ask emoguitarchick21 A Question ]
xxsima answered Saturday June 17 2006, 4:50 pm: Explain to your grandma that what she wore is different from what girls wear now. Tell her that you are growing up and a lot of other girls breasts sometimes stick out. Tell her that you appreciate that she cares, but this is how you WANT to dress.
xxoBriannax answered Saturday June 17 2006, 4:11 pm: She's being like that because when she was growing up, all the girls wore dresses down to there ankels. She is just stuck in time. Tell her that that's how girls dress now a days and the fashions have changed. I wouldn't let it bother you though. [ xxoBriannax's advice column | Ask xxoBriannax A Question ]
xomegaroni answered Saturday June 17 2006, 3:25 pm: i definately would say it's the time period. you should wear what you want to & juss respect her as much as you can. i mean yeah, you're a girl, you have boobs, obviously you're going to have a shape. maybe you can find clothes that you like & she will like at the same time?? she's probably juss not used to the clothes today. really though, not a lot of places have conservative dresses er anything so it's kind've difficult to shop for stuff like that. don't worry about it too much. maybe you can find something that's inbetween.
xoxSeaxBreezexox answered Saturday June 17 2006, 2:47 pm: I'm not sure if this will help you in anyway, but I will say it anyway. You have to remember that your grandmother grew up in a different time when things were much different than the present time. When she graduated, she probably wore something a little more nicer than what you would normally wear today.
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