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humorist-workshop
School and the people
How come everyone thinks im mean? all i do is tell the truth. I gues they just cant handle the truth. Do you guys appreciate it when people tell you the truth or stupid lies? I would rather know the truth not stupid lies people tell me to feel better gosh.
Whats your opinion
Ya_gots_to_luv_me :)
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Maybe give some free advice about: School?
Hrrpmphh well yes people aren't used to the truth, the truth hurts sometimes. Yes there are times when you need to use extensions of the truth to get your way or to kiss up for that same reason mentioned, but when a friend truly needs advice it is most valuable to him or her if you can tell them like it is so they can get the honest facts and therefore be able to handle their situation more thoroughly and affectively. By downsizing a situation to make yourself feel better you only put off trying to take care of it. You know? You're not mean. in the world we live in honesty, even brutal honesty, is a rare and valuable thing... don't give it up!
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It's great that your not afraid to be honest! Just be sure to let people down easy. For example, if someone's makeup looks bad, don't say "Oh my gosh! Your makeup looks horrible!" Just be like " Hey, you have a makeup smudge on your face, just to let you know." Doesn't that give off a better impression than the other? Anyway, I hope I helped and good luck!
*x0oLoViN'iTo0x*
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good on you,id love to be like that,it takes alot of guts to do that.ive got a mate like taht and shes great i ask how i look and evreything.so tell them to stop being so senstive
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i am on your side. all i do is tell the truth too but you do have to be nice.i feel the same way i want to know the truth and not lies that people say to make you feel better.in my opinion it is better to tell the truth than to lie no matter what it is about. or how hard it will be.
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b/c you can't be mean with the truth you have to be subtle or u will have many enemies...trust me i know!!
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Dear Schoolandthepeople,
If you think people think that you are mean, it may be the tone in which you're saying it. Telling the truth and being mean are two completely different things. I appreciate the truth myself, and if someone is saying something in order to help me, I will certainly take it into consideration. However, if the tone and the words are condescending, rude or they sound mean, is there any way else to take it? And are you able to give it but not able to take it back? You can tell the truth and be compassionate at the same time. Nobody likes to be put down or thought of as a failure. Nor do people like to think that you are better than them even though you may have a better suggestion than them. If you are getting this a lot, from different people, try making a suggestion using a different tone and also consider how you would feel if someone you liked or respected responded the same way to you. Because, unfortunately, you can't change other people, but you can change the way you relate to other people. Hope it works for you. Good Luck!
Linda
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Personally, I find it wonderful when people have the guts to admit that they think something, although sometimes it's not the best thing to do.
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The truth hurts.. some people, i'll amit like me, can't handle it in certain areas. There is never a right place or situation to lie but it happens. I'd rather hear the truth upfront to my face than lies to my back.
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You should be honest. (Don't start lying just to make people happy.) However, what you say can sometimes be less important than how you say it.
What I mean be this is...When I am telling the someone the truth, and I know that what I have to say might hurt their feelings, I try to be gentle. I usually start by telling them how much I care about them, that I understand their perspective, and then try to phrase things in the most sensitive way. I try to avoid getting angry and using negative language. Most people understand that I am not trying to attack them, and as a result don't become so defensive.
You also have to know when telling the truth isn't necessary. Someone gave a pretty good example. If your best friend is overweight, and she's complaining about being fat, telling her that she is really isn't necessary. Doesn't mean you have to lie, it simply means that you should observe the old addage, "If you don't have anything nice to say than don't say anything at all."
I try to reserve the truth for situations that really need it. I tell the truth when I feel like lying or remaining silent would either hurt someone else or myself. I tell the truth when I'm asked for my honest opinion. Etc., etc., etc...
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There is an old cliche that you should really learn the meaning of, dear. "Discretion is the better part of valor." It basically means that sometimes it's better to say NOTHING than to say something you know will only make a situation worse. Another, "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." There is no reason you should start lying and just telling people what they want to hear, but your life will be much easier and you'll have more friends if you learn to keep your big mouth shut. Good luck!
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ok.. well.. it depends on how they want the truth.. like if they say their fat... and u really think they are.. DONT agree! and sometimes the truth just isnt the right thing to say!
Hope i helped!
DuMb!<im not callin you that, im callin muhself that!
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It is good to tell the truth but you must learn to tell it nicely and when to stop. like, if you think someones ugly and they think they're hot and you wanna tell them so they dont embarrass themselves... dont go up to them and say 'your ugly'. that is horrible. if you MUST say something... just think about it first. think of the persons feelings. remember, if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say anything at all.
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me, i am an incredibly blunt person too, but that kind of gets our types in trouble because society likes to maintain a facade to others. its a fascinating thing in a lab, but it sucks in real life.
I require a blunt form of honesty from my friends, but most people think the truth is in fact relative and can be viewed from different perspectives as a lie. just do what i do and think about what you say before saying it. or lift weights so that you have the physical ability to back up whatever you say.
remember the lesson of the nuremburg trials; might makes right.
-hitler
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The answer to your question is one word. Tact. The WAY you tell the truth. If you don't want people to be offended or to get mad at you, try telling the truth with a little bit of consideration. Don't be quite so blunt and just say what's on your mind. Try and tell them in a way that's not accusing ("You're doing this or that") and if it's something that's effecting you, try using the word "feel" ("You make me feel bad when you do this").
Hope that helps!
Bunni
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The truth is better... but the truth can always hurt too. I know we've been told that since forever but it's true. Sometimes fantasy is better than reality, and when someone breaks the truth to them, they are crushed to see that perspective of things. Try telling people in a nice way to make it sound not so terrible. Dont start lying... but dont be too forward about everything... it can really hurt people
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I am one of those girls who gives the truth no matter how much it would offend them. As for guys, they don't appreciate the truth about themselves because it probably hurts, but they will learn to like it when they mature. But lots of people don't throw the truth at people because they think its mean, or they don't have the guts. They think its mean because, there aren't many people like us out there mainly. Everybody wants to know the truth, but you just put it out better.
-TheTeenGirl
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maybe people don't like you because you tell too much truth. maybe you like when people tell you the truth but people are different maybe you shold lie when it protecting their feelings & sometimes u should tell the truth but don't tell the truth when it could hurt someone's feelings. hope i helped aloty!!!:-)
*icepriencss*
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I'd certainly feel better with the truth.
But you are right. Most people don't want to hear it.And they do think your mean.They just want someone to agree with them.
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