Im a Christian, a mom, a wife, a business owner, and a woman. Im honest and out spoken. I am here to help the best I can...
Gender: Female
Location: Montana
Age: 34
Member Since: April 22, 2010
Answers: 23
Last Update: April 14, 2011
Visitors: 2739
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Long story short, my mom is constantly bringing me down. I'm only fifteen, about to be sixteen.
She tells me I'm selfish and treats me like I'm five. I'm a very forgetful person and I get punished for it. I think it is wrong. My mom tells me that I won't make it anywhere in life because I don't know what to do with myself. She expects perfection out of my sister and I and we are very sensitive. She is always bringing me down. She has no faith in me. She gets mad and pissy because I can't be what she wants me to be. She gets angry when I tell her things and she's always trying to control my life. I need some freedom. She is tearing me apart. Yesterday she threatened to smash my head through the windshield because I didn't turn down a certain street while driving. She always threatens to take my cat away and is always making huge violent threats. I am scared of her. I'm scared to go to her for problems so I go to my dad. My dad lives in California. My mom says I'm a two face because I talk to my dad after he cheated on her ten years ago. She says I'm just like him and that hurts because my dad isn't the best person around. I come to school in tears and pain because we fight all morning over the dumbest stuff. I can't take it anymore. Nobody has faith in me and everyone treats me like I am retarded. I feel worthless and alone. I tell her it hurts when she does certain things and she uses the whole, I'm your mom and I can do whatever I want, phrase. I can't take it anymore. I need help. (link)
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I have to be honest, it sounds like your mom needs help. From the short bit that you wrote, I would guess that she is verbally and emotionally abusive, and if she hasnt started already, on her way to being physically abusive. You are not worthless, nor are you retarded...you are simply being hurt by a woman who should be loving and protective of you. I urge you to reach out to an agency for help, a school counselor, the boys and girls club, even a hotline for abused children, anything. She cannot do whatever she wants, that statement is being used to control you. I will; be praying.
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i have a question for a doctor but i dont want to call, i want to do it online and free. is there any sites that are really good for that ? (link)
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webmd.com
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So some dick sold me a verizon phone that was probably stolen. It's activated on someone elses account..All the contacts are erased and i can't deactivate it because i dont know the account information. What do I do with it? (link)
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Take it to a verizon dealer, they should be able to pull up the account info from the phone information and ID....like the phone number. They will be able to help you. Then notify the authorites, and let the dick go to jail...
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A question to those who are religious.
Christians?
Jesus believers.
Why does your religion believe that Witchcraft is wrong? Why do you seem to think that Witches gain their power and energies from hell?
Most Witchcraft doesn't even have anything to do with heaven or hell...?
(link)
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Actually, witchcraft does get its energy from Satan... Satan uses pagan beliefs to lure people from worshipping the one true God... I know. I used to be wiccan, and thought I was ok, but I was wrong. Wicca and witchcraft claim to be different. One form acknowledges the tie to black magic and evil, the other claims to be a religion. Wicca harnesses the energy from the earth to perform spells, calling on the goddesses and gods they worship...However, the Bible states that there is only one God we are to worship, so the information doesnt coincide. The Bible also cleary states to beware evildoers, witches and those who practice sorcery... While the pagan individuals believe they are getting their powers from various means, all Christians believe otherwise. I hope this helps.
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iv grown up in a catholic family and have went to all religious private schools but i dont believe. i am roman catholic but i am leaning towards athiest atleast agnostic. i want to believe i want to be helped, but i havent a clue where to start. how can i start again or can someone convince me? and another reason is why would god let me be tortured and put into trauma by jerks trying to steal me and take advantage, why. two years straight of this crap. 16/f (link)
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I remember feeling like this, alot. But Ive learned a few things...First, God isnt to blame for your pain and suffering...The people that are hurting you, are. God doesnt promise great things on Earth, a geat life, none of it...He promises that IF we accept his son Jesus Christ into our hearts we will enter into Heaven with him. Our time here is about growth and learning, loving people, and getting to know God... Your relationship with God is a personal one, and important. Catholic schools teach memorized prayers, and strict routines, but maybe try sitting down alone, and just have a heart to heart conversation with God. Tell him how you are feeling, tell him your doubts and your hurts, give them to Him...Not to a preacher in a little box, but to God. Ask him to give you a sense of peace, of guidance. Start with that, and then maybe open your bible, and look in Psalms...there are alot of verses that bring me comfort when I am going through challenges. Remember that through everything God is with you, loving you, and hold on tight to your faith. Satan attacks our weaknesses to draw us away from God. Be a warrior of Christ, put on the full armor of God....
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Fourteen years ago, I was baptized Catholic. I attended a Catholic school from kindergarten to second grade. Aside from that I never went regularly to church, still don't. In the beginning of third grade I moved and attended public school. However, about a year ago I started doubting my religion. I did my share of research and found it that ,maybe, Catholicism wasn't the religion for me. So I declared myself agnostic, I still do. I still am very unsure of what to believe. Anyways, when I tried to 'clue' it to my mom she exploded and TOLD me I was Catholic and that God WAS real. Pretty much forcing this upon me. I believe that religion is a personal thing and that a person should not force it onto you (like baptism). I respect my mother and the Catholic church and their beliefs. I just so happen not to believe the same as them. So what I wanted advice on is my mother. Should I just not even try to get her to understand me? We usually get along fine, it's just the topic of religion that we have our different views on.
I would appreciate it if your respected my views as I do yours, so please don't bash me. (link)
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This is a tough one to deal with, I know. I went to Catholic school as a kid, and I wasnt Catholic. I dealt with judgement and problems all the time. Unfortunately it seems that the Catholic Church teaches that if you are not a devout Catholic, you will go to Hell...which is probably what your mom believes. She probably freaked because she is worried and scared. Here's the reality...and you can share this with her if you'd like. According to the Bible, nothing anyone does can ever earn them a place in Heaven. The ten commandments are God's Laws, and all of us have broken atleast one of them. The only way to Heaven is through Jesus Christ. Jesus paid the price for our sins, and by accepting the gift he already gave you, that is the way to Heaven. It doesnt matter what church you go to, or how good you are. I encourage you to seek out answers, and take time to find your beliefs and faith. I dont claim any religion other than Christian. Imperfect, faulty, sinful, and saved. I dont think its that she doesnt understand you, I really think its that she is scared. She loves you, worries about you, cares about you. Im a mom too, and sometimes it is really hard to let your kids go their own way. Even if you dont believe, I hope that you can find it in your heart to forgive her, and love her...Know that she might not understand...she might even try to talk to you about it alot...but I think she is just loving you. Think about it, yuor mom who gave you life, who takes care of you...who loves you...is very scared that if you were to die tomorrow, you would go to Hell if yu had no faith in Jesus, do you see why she might have a hard time? Her faith, her belief, is very strong...She is scared for you.
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okay so I think I may be suffering from some sort of anxiety disorder. I have looked on many websites so I'm really just looking for advice from someone who may have the disorder or who knows someone who has it. I don't want to go to a doctor quite yet just in case Im just imagining things. I constantly feel like people are watching me when I know they arent, I always have to be on time to everything and if Im not I can't force myself to go (I dropped out of the first college I went to because of this), I randomly get these horrible heart pains when Im nervous every few months (they began when I was in 6th grade) that cause me to be short of breath and my left arm to ache, I constantly play with my hair, bite my nails, and the inside of my mouth until I annoy people to the point where they tell me to stop, I always think about what people will think of me even before I do things...I know this is long and there is much more but this is effecting things I do everyday, I need help and my parents say its just my personality so I'm afraid to go to a doctor fearing I'll sound stupid. Thank you. (link)
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One thing I can say, is that at the very least you should go see the dr to put your mind at rest. Im not a dr, so I cant say for certain if you have an anxiety disorder, but some of your sypmtoms also seem to mimic ADHD, and the two can shadow each other alot. I have both. There are alot of treatment options out there, and they can help you function pretty well. Please do not allow your family to diagnose you either, unless they have a medical degree. And as for it being your personality...Anxiety disorders, adhd, all these things tend to be existent even when we are kids, and can get worse during situations in our life, like change or stress...So again, go to the dr, they wont think anything bad, they are here to help, and see this stuff alot.
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19/Female
I am applying for scholarships for my sophomore year of college. I recently filled out my FAFSA form, and I am not receiving enough financial aid to cover my college so this is the first time I have to apply for any.
I am getting ready to right an essay on leadership and how it has affected my life and I need some advice on doing it. I want to right about my mother having Multiple Sclerosis and how I have had to step up to the plate since we found out. I don't want to come off as needy or looking for a charity vote though. I just need some pointers on how to keep it from getting sappy or sounding pathetic.
I also am unsure how to go about writing it. Should it be exactly like papers I do for my classes? Or can it be a little more personal? I guess what I am asking is if it would be okay to say something like this,
"I thought long and hard about what I was going to write this essay about. Leadership has played many roles in my life, but I have learned most about it through the diagnosis of my mother's MS. If anything has taught me leadership skills, it's this."
Or something along those lines. Should I keep it formal and not mention I am writing the essay, or not?
Thanks. Any more pointers are welcome as well! :) (link)
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Leadership is serving. Thats how you lead. I would suggest talking about that, and how serving your mom in her time of need has helped you to realize this. Then reference it, look back on some of the other great leaders in the world, and show how they have led by serving. Dont focus on the MS, focus on the serving and the growth it has caused in your character. Show how becoming a positive role model in your home (aka: leader) has led you to become a leader in other areas of your life. Good luck!
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my girlfriend cheated on me with her ex and everything is all screwed up now were still together but i dont trust her at all anymore im always wondering what she's doing and who she's talking to it doesnt help that she works at a bar to i mean i guess i still love her but it makes me sick just thinking about what she did how am i supposed to trust her again (link)
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I guess it all depends on what you want. Is she someone you want to marry and be with the rest of your life? If yes, I would suggest you seek some couples counseling. Its important to discover what led to the affair, so a way can be determined to avoid it in the future. And can you forgive her? Forgiveness means not holding it against her, at all. Its tough, and a process. As for her working in a bar, if you feel this is the cause of the issues you both are having, maybe its time to sit down and have a serious conversation. How much does she want things to work? Is she willing to make a couple changes in her life to help put you at ease? Are you willing to do the same for her? Relationships are not about making ourselves happy, they are about caring about the person we love more than ourselves. If you do all that you can for her, and she does all that you can for you, you both will be taken care of, and hopefully happy. There is a book, called the "Love Dare"...I believe it was created to help relationships that are struggling. I reccommend you get a copy, and go through each step, but dont tell her about it till the end. As for the sick feeling, its tough, I know. But in time that yucky feeling in your gut will start to fade. Hang in there.
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I might be hired as a housekeeper for $9/hr to work in a few million dollar homes.
I'm wondering what exactly a housekeeper does though? (link)
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Housekeepers tasks can vary from laundry to dusting to cleaning floors, the list is endless. I will tell you that its usually tough work, and atleast where Im located, residential house cleaners average $18-$25 an hour. Conrats on the possible job, but be prepared, it could be alot of work.
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ok here's the thing im a 20 y.o female, ive been in some relationships but never had sex, that was basically my rule like anything but sex.. not because of religion issues, but more like as in i have the biggest fear of getting pregnant, im still a university student , couldn't deal with a baby right now ... im in a relationship right now with someone i care and love very very much, and i know i want to have sex with him, and i know id have birth control and condoms, but still i have this huge fear , but i really really want to do never been more sure about this. like is it really probably to get pregnant that way? or what is ur recomendation for this ? (link)
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If you still have reservations, wait. This is something you want to do when you are 100% ready, and not a moment before. It sounds like you have an amazing relationship, so wait until you are ready.
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Everytime I pee lately, my bladder stings afterwards, and twice a tiny bit of blood has come out. Also, sometimes it feels like I have to pee a lot more than I actually do. Whats wrong! (link)
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Go see your doctor. Blood means infection or irritation, and both things need to be treated asap. I wouldnt wait any longer...
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okay i went to this awake-a-ton and meet this guy, hes 17 and im only 14. we got on great and were really open to each other. I only had known him for a day b4 he asked me for my home number msn, facebook ect. hes called several times and talks asthough he likes me.... the problem is he has a gf. he lives far away so im not sure what to do.... is it normal for a guy to call a girl/hug ect when he has a gf... how do i find out if he likes me .. without him thinking im a foulish teen ?? (link)
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I hope you take this seriously, I really do... Do not go meet this person. Not in any way, shape, or form. Do not give him any information, and tell your parents immediately. There are alot of people out there who dont have good hearts, and seek to hurt others. It is possible this guy is really nice, but if he is, he will have no problem coming to your home and hanging out with you and your parents. When I was younger I dealt with someone who really hurt me, alot. You can help avoid this by taking steps to protect yourself. Go talk to your parents, and arrange for this guy to meet them. I will tell you, that if he already has a gf, and he's flirting, you deserve someone better. Good luck.
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i think im addicted to weed.
i always need it, crave it want it but yet its not an actual addictive drug....
i love smoking in the morning at like 6 am before school.
and smoking thorugh the day.
and before i go to sleep
i just really love it
the down part is i eat SO MUCHHHHHHH from it
and i waste so much money.
how do i quit? its so hard for me?
and is it such a bad habbit to have? (link)
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Do some research, and you will find that weed is dangerous. One joint contains more harmful chemicals than 10 cigarettes. And yes, it can be addictive. When a close friend of mine quit, he went through some mild fevers, shakiness, and mood swings. It is tough for some people, and very easy for others. I strongly reccommend finding a narcotics anonymous group in your area to give you support through this. It sounds like you smoke it quite a bit, so in your case its a matter of making a lifestyle change. Good luck!
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A while back, i was dating this guy exclusively, but we didn't call it a relationship. as time went on, he became more distant. he started bailing on plans multiple times a week, and basically only texted me to tell me he was too busy to hang out again, or to try to see me if it was friday or saturday night. i tried everything to deal with it, i suggested we study together if he was too busy to do anything else, i tried being more present in his life, then less, finally tried to detach myself completely. when that failed, i realized he didn't care about me and ended it. he said that after 4 months, he still couldn't be emotionally invested because i'm going abroad next year.
it's been a month, and i tried to move on. i met someone new who's wonderful, but we're taking it slow. last weekend, my ex saw us together and expressed to my roommate how upsetting it was for him. if i thought he cared enough to be jealous, i probably wouldn't have ended it in the first place. if we want to be together, it seems silly for my pride to get in the way, but i just don't know what to do. as of now, he's given me no reason to think he cares about me at all. should i wait for him to express it to me directly? should i initiate some conversation? (link)
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I think that it may be more than jealousy. It sounds like your ex wants a relationship with you, and doesnt want you to leave. Im not sure why you are going abroad, so I dont know all the details, but I think you two should sit down and talk. Lay everything out, and go from there. I dont know if you've ever heard the phrase, "love is an action, not an emotion" but its basically saying that loving someone means doing the tough stuff, not just loving when things are good. If you love him, go to him and talk.
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The only computer in my house is in my room. My dad is the only one who used it today and in a minimized window is "Literotica." I flipped back through the pages and he's reading titles in the Incest section under the searches "love," "lust," and "daddy."
I am his only daughter. I'm 17. He's 60.
I'm really disturbed. I've seen it on the history before but I've figured, everyone has strange fetishes. But incest?! This is really grossing me out. I feel like I have to hide my body now around him. I dress like most teenage girls-- short shorts, low cut tops-- and now I just want to cover up and die.
Should I bring it up with my mom? She's the only other one living in the house. I'm too embarrassed to tell my boyfriend. This is just so weird. My dad's seriously not a creep or a perv, this is just so unexpected.
Thanks for any advice =/ (link)
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Yes, go to your mother, immediately. Its possible it means nothing, its possible its just a weird mistake, but you need to let your mom know what is going on and let her help you.
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17/f, boyfriend is also 17 and we've been going out for just about 6 months.
Well, a few weeks ago was our 5 month anniversary and on that day I fell more in love with my boyfriend than I had ever been. We had really deep talks and we sat in a hammock under the moonlight and he told me that I was the most beautiful girl in the world. I was the happiest I've ever been. It was wonderful and perfect and I knew that we had never been closer than that night.
However, just a few days after that, a ton of bad things happened in my family. My uncle died, my cousin went into the ICU because of heart complications, and my parents started fighting nonstop because of funeral arrangements. Understandably, or at least I thought it was understandable, I was very upset. I didn't come to school for a few days and kept snapping at everyone, especially my boyfriend. I was also VERY prone to tears. I thought he'd understand because obviously losing somebody you're very close to, the possibility of losing another, and your parents yelling can really take a toll on your life! I thought wrong. My boyfriend is basically avoiding me. He says that he can't help me because I'm just letting the stress get to me and that I'm the only person who can make that go away. He used to write me letters, and kiss me, and tell me how much he loved me... lately he hasn't been doing any of those things. This has made me even sadder and more snappish. Yesterday he said something really scary.
Me: *RAWRMEANSTUFFRAWR*
BF: Well, I'm going to leave you alone because you're really pissed off.
Me: The only reason I'm pissed off is because you're pissing me off because you're not there for me!
BF: I'm still going to leave you alone now.
Me: Or leave me forever, that's what you mean, right? (Remember this was in the heat of the moment)
BF: If that's what you want, yeah.
Me: Well, you're probably not going to see me for a week. That's probably good... we both need to take a break from each other... but not a breakup break, just a thinking time.
BF: A long break.
So, we're not seeing each other, but we're still talking. The problem is, he rarely wants to talk to me and he's being really weird. I felt terrible for being so mean to him so I keep trying to make it up. I really regretted all the bad things I've said and tried to make it clear to him that they weren't anything to do with him, but rather, my life. I've apologized and told him that he truly means the world to me and that I don't want to break up with him. That this is one bad period out of months of wonderful ones... but he feels distant, cold, and agitated. It's like he doesn't want to be around me... I try to give him lots of space, but then he thinks I'm ignoring him. I feel like he's going to break up with me and I'm dreading it. I love this boy... When I tell him my fears, he says that I'm stupid and that I worry too much but he does nothing to help solve them.
I know you're going to say that if he doesn't see you through this, he's not worth it. Trust me, he's worth it. There's just a big wedge between us that I have to try and remove. I just want to go back to the way we were on our 5 month anniversary. I really really love him... and I'm far from ready for this relationship to be over.
That was terribly long... and I really thank all of you who took the time to read this. You have no idea how much it means to me. (link)
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Guys dont always handles stress well either... While you feel like crying and falling apart, he is probably helplessly watching you suffer, and not knowing how to help you. This is where communication is very important. You two need to stop ignoring each other, sit down, and talk. Things may not get better, but there is a chance that you two will work through this and then be able to develop a deeper, stronger relationship. The reality is, you know in your heart what you want to do, and you dont need our advice. You love him, so go to him and try to work things out. Good luck.
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About Two nights ago, i had a weird nightmare where my friend was dying, this restaurant by my school was blown up into bits and peices and it was on fire. dead firemen were being pulled out of the fire and then i looked up at the sky and i saw a huge bomb and people were saying it was headed towards this city which i can't name on here, for stalking reasons, but my friends live there so i was tellling everybody to run. Today we had a shooting threat and our theatre in our school is performing into the woods.. well it was supposed to be going on during the show and there was a hit list. nothing happened, but now i am scared that there will be a bomb or something. what does my nightmare mean?? can someone translate it and do you think that my nightmare meant anything i should be aware of? please oh please help me. I also suffer from heavy anxiety. are there any tricks to calm down the soul? (link)
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Dreams are just your brains way of working through things in your sub conscious, so try not to worry. Anxiety is tough to deal with, but here are a couple things that can help.... One thing is to practice tummy breathing, place your hand on your stomach and as you inhale and exhale, focus on making that hand move in and out. It requires slow steady breathing. Also, push the anxiety...Alot of times my anxiety can be a bit irrational, so I continue looking at it until I realize the bad things im worrying about, probably will never happen. Hope it helps a little!
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Ok well im 16/f and i cut my self . On my wrist and dont tell me to use a rubber band cause it dosent work ive tryed or write in a jurnal cause ive done that to.. IT DOSENT WORK. my friend always asks why i have cuts on my wrists and i say oh my cat cut it. and if he finds out he will think im doing it for attention but im really not my mom passed away 3 weeks ago. and my dad abuses me. I have no relatives. so i have no one to talk to . so i turned to cuting . It really helps me but i need to stop . Because of what i tryed to do. Commit suicide but i stoped because my one and only friend caught me and grabbed me and took me home. I have had a really screwed up past . i was raped at the age of 13 and took drugs at 14 so now all of that made me really depressed . I really am loseing faith so someone please tell me what i could do to help i dont have enough money to go to a theropist so dont tell me that. im really scared of my dad so please help..
(link)
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Cutting is actually a disorder, that requires treatment. The process of cutting releases chemicals which cause a brief period of relaxed feeling for the cutter...However, as with any addictions, the results are short lived, the side effects are horrible, and it takes more and more to achieve the same result. If your dad is abusing you, tell someone. Immediately. Go to a teacher or a police officer or a doctor. Someone you can trust. The path you are on leads to bad places, and you need to change the direction before its too late. Going through the things you have is tough, very tough. But you have to make the choice to be a survivor, and not a victim. You are already taking the right steps by reaching out for help, now Im asking you to believe in yourself just a little more and take another couple steps. Report your father, and go to the counselor at school and tell them whats going on. There are alot of agencies out there that provide free services, so please do not worry about the cost. You say you are losing faith, which concerns me. Please dont wait any more, you are to valuable. I am willing to bet your mom is watching you, and loving you, and wanting you to get the help you need.
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does it feel good for the girl when the guy finishes inside her? (link)
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Most times, other than the increased fluid, the female wont feel it at all. There is a slight tightening of the penis for a few seconds, but thats about it.
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