Gender:
FemaleLocation:
New York, New YorkMember Since:
November 8, 2012Answers:
25Last Update:
July 30, 2014Visitors:
4273Main Categories:
Love Life
Families
Friendship
View All
about
Hello!!! I'm here to give you individualized personal advice. Whether you have questions about relationships, sex, friends, beauty tips, physical and mental health concerns and questions, I'll always try to give my most honest, non-judgmental, and kind advice :) Feel free to ask!Best Wishes!!!
advice
Dear Vikki
I'm 24 and from South Africa. I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now and before that we were only friends. I love him a lot and care about him a lot, but at times I feel that my insecurities gets in the way and it ends up in us having an argument about something small and stupid. See we have a long distance relationship at the moment and it is mostly when he cannot have decent conversation at night because his busy and then I start thinking "maybe he doesn't want to talk to me" , "maybe he doesn't find me interesting anymore and he will leave me for someone else" and I do know that he cares for me a lot and that he loves me and as soon as I think I have these feelings under control, it creeps in again. I don't want to lose him, because I was insecure and clingy. I never was like this in the beginning. I was cheated on before and most of the times it is when I'm away from him, when we are together, I don't have it and because of this it makes things hard for me. I care about people real fast and they can actually hurt me with words. How do I get past this? How can I get past my insecurities and not be clingy when I feel like these emotions are creeping in? I'm not jealous when it comes to being his girlfriends, because I know what type of guy he is. I know he will never cheat on me, but because I don't always see myself as beautiful, I'm sometimes afraid he will leave me for someone more beautiful than me. The guy that cheated on me used to say to me, that I shouldn't think that someone can love me, because there feelings will change. I was so deeply hurt.
Is there any advice you can give me? Guess I'm just looking for someone to talk to that I don't know personally!
Thanks!
Hello!!!
First off you touched on many great points we all can learn from, so thank you for being so brave and putting your thoughts and feelings to words.
It's totally okay to be insecure! Everyone is, even the most Beautiful woman in the world, like models and actresses rated most beautiful woman, are super insecure! Why? Because security is something found within yourself, and it takes years to master, if not your whole life! So be patient with yourself :) it takes a true pro to accept this, and by accepting you are insecure, you are being very strong. Some people don't get that far. My favorite quote is, "my weakness is my strength". Your imperfect perfections makes you gorgeous, and more importantly you are gorgeous!!! Why? Because in our society where shallow view points on beauty is valued so highly, true beauty is being overlooked. Your boyfriend see's that in you, and you yourself see the beauty of you in him, or else there would not be such a great attraction that would keep you going long distance (cheers to that!) It is up to you to realize you are beautiful. Unfortunately, even those that love you, can not do that for you. Start with exercises like this. Write post it's and stick it on your mirror of what you find beautiful about yourself. It could be things your bf has said, it can be something a family member or friend has said. Something you love about yourself. "Good morning gorgeous!", is my favorite to stick to my fridge after a long night, and a very "feeling unattractive morning". Even if I don't feel it, it makes me smile. Then start saying it aloud to yourself in the mirror. Good morning beautiful. Then move on to say, I am beautiful. The reason your ex said all those things about you, is because he felt him about himself. In all honesty, no truly beautiful person ever says such things, unless they want to feel better then you. So what does that mean? If he wanted to feel better then you by saying that, it means he felt a lot worse. Remove yourself from all people in your life that make your feel inferior, a lot of the times they do that is because they see how stunning you are, and how crappy they feel compared to you. By remove I mean, ignore those that judge you, and make you feel like crap. Accept and allow yourself to let those in that accept you for you and see your beauty. Don't have a lot of those people? Once you start those small exercises, your gonna start getting annoyed with those who don't believe what you believe. Because after a while of repeating it over and over, You will start to see your beauty. If a boss comes hard on you, accept you are not perfect and realize there is no such thing! Perfection is in our head! If a friend or family ember says something that you feel you don't deserve. Walk away, ask yourself is tree anything you can do to make then feel differently, if the answer is no, it's there issue. Most of the time it will always be the other persons issue, weather we realize it or not. So repeat that too. You can't wear other people's issues. I never saw other people's issue being worn on runways in Milan but we as humans always seem to do it. Don't do it. Stop yourself, and realize your wonderful qualities. And that it's not your issue.
Now to trust. It is always hard to trust when it comes to relationships in general. You realize in the end though it's not so much as the trust between two people that is affecting you and your significant other but the trust between you and yourself. Meaning, how can you trust your boyfriend, or anyone for that matter when you can not trust the fact that you, yourself, picked someone worth trusting. You must trust your judgement that this guy is someone who will not ever want to deliberately hurt you. Then you must accept the fact no matter what.... And this is hard to wrap your head around and accept, so bare with me, you will get hurt. Life, unfortunately, is about pain and hurt, and what one does to spin that into gold. Hurt makes us stronger, hurt helps us prepare for hard outcomes we can't change, hurt makes us more empathetic and better humans beings. Weather you want to or not, hurt will come. And no wall or prevention will change that. So accept that hurt is apart of life, and can only make you a better person. I know!!! Not easy, but like I said, these are life lessons. Now piggybacking off that idea.... You can not stop anyone from hurting you, weather your bf says something, or does something that hurts you, you can not prevent it. Why? Because it has nothing to do with you. It is his choice. So no matter how hard you fear what pain may or may not come from the course of your relationship, realize that cheating is a choice. Moving on from a relationship is a choice. Staying together, and giving each other the respect you both deserve is also a choice. Your bf seems he's making the choice to stay with you, and respect your relationship! Trust yourself that you've picked someone who will do that, and give you the respect you deserve. However if he does respect you in anyway, realize it is not your fault! It is his. Let it go. Do whatever you can to deal with the hurt, and heal yourself. Back to, this is not your issue. You can't stop night and day from coming. Or the seasons. Everything always has it's way. But this is just pro active thinking, to help you trust him more. When you realize this is you, you need to trust, listen to your gutt feeling, not your desires, and accept him cheating is a choice, and pain in apart of being a better more beautiful person (though it sucks) you are better prepared for this long distance relationship.
Which brings me to my last point: long distance relationships are hard!! I am telling you from personal experience and most of my friends being in long distance relationships at one point, some still. The distance will test you! Test your nerves, your faith in each other, your own inner strength. Do not let it break you. Learn from it, realize that it's not the distance but it's who you are as people that the distance is mirroring. Weather if he is next to you, or millions of miles away sooner or later you would have to deal with all of your insecurities on your own. You would have to accept your beautiful and your bf loves you. You would have to accept life in painful, but sometimes worth the pain for the amazing feelings to come. You would have to trust yourself, and those around you worth loving. So stay strong, and remember to always speak to him. If you feel your calling at a bad time, listen to your gutt. Not your desires or negative thoughts. Always aim for positive thoughts. Make positive thoughts louder then negative. If he says he can't talk, understand. Just ask when is a better time. If you feel he is avoiding you, ask him, don't be afraid to tell him how you feel. He should be more then willing to accept it, and if he can't realize it has nothing to do with you, even if he says it does. It's him. Because you are imperfectly perfect and beautiful, and he has to realize that to be worthy for you as his girlfriend. Do not be afraid to do what's best for you. If you feel this isn't working, understand that if it doesn't work distance whise, it may eventually not work in a normal relationship setting. Do not blame yourself. Always trust in your own beauty and self. Every relationship is different. Never let your own past, or other people's relationships affect you. At the end of the day this is your life! You have control, and I'm more then positive you will always understand you are beautiful, and you will always take care of you.
Okay... So that is my very long advice :) but I hope I touched on everything and it helped :) I wish you positive luck and wishes with you, your boyfriend and your long distance relationship, and positive thoughts and wishes to the relationship with yourself. :) And you really are amazing... I can tell by your letter to me. Never doubt it!
Good luck!!!
So there's this guy I like and he sits next to me and my best friend in almost every lesson. Sometimes we don't talk but sometimes we act really friendly. We don't flirt or anything because I'm too shy and sometimes it would be awkward if we did because he's one of my best friends in class. But last week I started to like him a lot. But I don't really know what I want. Sometimes I feel like I'm too close to like him in the way I do and sometimes I think he likes my best friend. I haven't told anyone about this because I'm too shy and I know that my friends would make fun of me and tell him. I really don't know what to do so please help. He's not too good looking but I don't like him for his looks because he's really lovely. Please help xx
First of all, I think it's great you don't like him for his looks! It's very healthy, and mature to look past someone's looks to who they are on the inside. Another note is, if you can't tell your friend a secret that puts you into a vulnerable position, then you have to accept that there are gonna be a lot of things you won't be able to share with your best friend, if she's not willing to take it seriously. How we share things, is how we bond. So make sure your aware of where you stand on sharing things with her.
The next solution is don't make any decisions until you know what you want. You wrote you really like him. Enough to date him? If so then you have to be honest with him. Find a moment to tell him how you feel.
The worst he can do is say he doesn't feel the same way, which is okay, because that means there's something better out there, and you have to let it go with kindness and understanding. No matter which way you look at this it's a growing experience.
If you're not ready for dating anyone, and you just want to express your feelings then that totally okay too!
There are tons of ways of expressing how you feel without everyone having to know your business. One of the ways is write then down on a piece of paper at home, and rip it up. Write a letter you'll never send, or draw, paint, sing, even put a song that reminds you of him and dance to it. Put a song that helps you let go, and move on and dance to that. Know that you're the most important person in you're life right now, because you are.
You're entitled to your feelings, especially when you have some privacy. But don't do anything until your absolutely ready! I think above all you need to figure out what you want.
Can you see yourself dating him? Do you want to date at all? Do you like being single, and just being with yourself for now? Do you like him enough to be honest about your feeling and overcome your shyness for him?
It's all up to you. You're in control of what you choose to do, so take your time. No matter what happens it's all gonna work out!
Best Wishes & Good Luck!!!
My bro's best friend has liked me since I was in 7 grade. Right now he's a junior and im a freshman. He started noticing me first and I instantly fell for him. My bro knows I like him but he doesn't believe his friend likes me. We havent exactly told each other we like each other but we can kind of tell. But sometimes he ignores me and talks about other girls and I do the same to make him jealous. He stares at me a LOTTT. Also he has a lot of anxiety and he claims he has a cold heart and a lot of people find it hard to read him because he's always blank. Also, Im Muslim and can't date so my parents dont know. But anyway sometimes there's days where he talks to me a lot and he occasionally hugs me a lot and then there's days he ignores me and I feel like he's completely over me. Then every time I think he doesn't like me anymore, he starts showing signs and it seems he does. This guy also isn't flirty and isn't touchy but he touches me more than other girls however when he's with me he'll bring up girls and idk if its to make me mad or what. Anyway he told my brother I'm obsessed with him and its weird the other day which is completely untrue because most of the times he talks to me! And even other people have told my brother that its weird how he's always touching me. But when my brother told me his friend said this about me I was pissed off and decided to ignore him for a whole week straight and I could tell he was waiting for me to talk to him and he stared at me a lot but we started casually talking again. But I'm still confused on why he did this and does he actually like me? Did he make that up to cover up that he likes me? I really don't know and I'm sorry this is confusing.
It seems there's a lot going on. This guy is definitely sending you mixed messages! He could like you, and not want to admit it, maybe because he doesn't want it to be awkward between your brother and him? Or he could (and I hope this isn't the case) just like the attention, and be leading you on. Why? Some people feel better about themselves when they have tons of girls, or guys vying for their attention. He's certainly not being mature about it, and he's not coming out and saying anything positive about you to his brother. So why not ask him how he feels?
Scary and a presumptuous thing to do, but you have to ask him, or be honest about your feelings towards him. Only then will you really know what's going on. This is probably really hard to do, and no one at any age wants to be the one to do it. But you have to be mature. Relationships take honesty and maturity, so ask him how he feels. If you happen to have his number, avoid texting, if you want the truth, a lot of stuff gets distorted through text, because we can't see people's actual expressions.
Find a moment where you can speak with him in private, and ask him yourself, face to face. Just go up to him and say, "Hey! Are you free? I have a question I need you to answer." If he asks you then and there what it's about, and it's not the best time say, "It's not that serious, it's just been on my mind. Let's talk alone later?" Then suggest a time you both can talk in private.
It seems really forward, but being honest and maturity will stop this confusion. And remember no matter what comes of this, know that you can and will move on. Move on with grace, maturity, honesty and kindness. No matter what happens. In the end, you have to remember you're absolutely worth being honest and mature for, and if he can't do that, he's not worth it. No more games :) !!
Sending Best Wishes & Good Luck!
me and my dad have a broken relationship. we've had our ups and downs, but now it feels like he is constantly slating me. he says the things behind my mums back so she doesnt believe me. i self harm and have attempted suicide and really dont know what to do next. tonight has been the third time that ive tried to confront him after he called me a 'goth'-something i found quite offensive...after all i wear barley any black, and listen to pop music. he denied all allegations again, and i ended up self harming again. im scared of him. and i dont know what to do or say or who to talk to now, please help me
I'm so sorry that you are going through this. As children we see our dad's are someone who should protect us, support us, and be there for us. Unfortunately, that does not always happen. Take it from personal experience. You can not change your dad. As hard as it may seem to understand that, no one can change him. The funny thing is, as you get older you'll begin to realize his words, actions, and attacks towards you can only do so much to affect your life, because he's not in control. You are. He can't do anything besides, drive you mad, and hurt you emotionally, which can all be solves in a safe place talking to someone, or writing all of this down. He has absolutely no power, or control over you. Though it seems intimidating, think about this. Did your dad maybe have a rough childhood, traumatic experience, or maybe someone spoiled him too much, tortured him too much? There was no balance in his life? Either it was really bad, or so good it made him resentful? Your dad is going through his own storm. I say, ignore his and weather your storm out. Your the more important one. As you begin to realize you can't change him, or force anything to happen, and that reconnecting is a two way street, and focus on yourself, you'd be surprised how the opportunities to connect with him will come up in random unexpected ways, because you will start to connect with him, and not who you want him to be. You'd like him to be a mature, normal dad, but right now, it sounds like that's not in him. You can not change that, sad as it is, because truly he's only hurting himself.
It's easier to run away from all of this by harming yourself, but I promise you, it's not worth it. It only moves you closer towards being seen as a victim, rather then a survivor, and you are a survivor, or else you wouldn't have bravely reached out for help. You might want to start writing things down. Whenever you feel like it. I've found that even writing stuff on scrap paper when no one's around, shredding it, then throwing it away can be totally refreshing. You also might want to reach out to a councilor, a close family member, or good friend. Someone you can trust to talk about what's been going on in your own life, and taking a break to look over your own feelings, instead of letting his words dictate them.
Just know you are not alone. Sadly, we can not choose are parents, but we can choose to not let our parents unhealthy behavior dictate our lives. You're too kind to let his garbage bring your down. It's time to focus on loving you right now, and stepping away from him. Over time, you'll see that a relationship will build, and because you are focused on your life, and not focused on him, there will be a change where you can develop your own relationship between you, and him. It may not be completely healthy, or perfect, but it's your relationship with him. Once you get the fog cleared from your eyes, you'll begin to see him for who he is; with his vices and virtues.
Hang in there, stay strong, and my very best wishes that everything works out. I hope this helped :)
Hey guys...
So, i will fill you in. My boyfriend and I have been together for over 2 years.. I am 18 and he is 20. Its obvious we still love each other as much as we did when we first began. We are PERFECT for each other. We are very intimate but we go through periods without sexual intercourse. For example, we'll have sex frequently for a month and then not have sex for a month or two because of
1.busy schedules
2. i'm not on birth control (we use condoms though but sometimes he gets paranoid which i do not blame)
3. and not being able to find the opportunity (since we both still live with our parents and we are both VERY cautious especially around them..)
So its typically hard to find the opportunity but if we both REALLY want to, we'll always find a way.
Currently, my boyfriend and I are going through the "no sex" period and it is driving me crazy... Over the weekend I brought a condom to his house and asked him to have sex. He felt really bad and said sorry he was too tired and his parents are home anyways so he wouldn't be able to enjoy the sex as much since he would be paranoid the whole time. And he said that he doesn't want to be "half into it" when he sex with me. He wants to "give it his all" and make sure that it is special and not abuse the privilege. which i admit, is very thoughtful and I rather have him be this way rather than use me.
But it is now to the point where I am sooo sexually frustrated, that masterbating doesn't even helo anymore. I think I'm missing the "emotinoal" aspect of sex. Not the lust part. Because if it was the lust, I would be pleased by just simply masterbating.. But it's having the partner hold you and kiss you and make you feel nothing but love. THAT is what my sexual frustration is caused from, not lust.
I have been so frustrated to the point where I am irritable with my family, friends, and slacking on school work. I would never cheat on brandon but i've had unfaithful thoughts of trying to find ways to cure my sexual frustration and those thoughts completely scare me! And lately, My boyfriend and I have been fighting more than usual.. I mean, we always seem to fix the fight but I just feel like if we have sex soon, it will all be better. We need it.. I just don't want to say anything again because i know it will make him feel bad.
I keep asking him if there's something wrong and if he still feels the same way about me and he always says "Your so beautiful and sexy" and words like that. Moreover, he says "I love you" to me frequently and holds me really tight when he says it. So i can feel his honesty in those three words, so that reassures me that there is nothing wrong with out relationship. Its honestly just the sex..
Another thing he says, is he loves spontaneous sex. But i don't think he should expect our sex life to be spontaneous because that would be hard to do considering we live with out parents still. he shouldn't assume our relationship and sex life is going to be spontaneous. he's going to have to make our sex life and relationship a priority. Relationships take work.. I mean, he doesn't have to go as far as penciling it in the calender but he should at least let me know when there are available times to have sex. I'm going crazy here.. and i love him so much :(
Please give me advice on anything I could do to turn him on extra, or how to just simply be honest with him.. without starting a fight or anything. Also, if you have tips on how to release sexual frustration that'd be great.. Thanks.
I need your help :(
Hello!
Everyone has dry periods, so it's normal to feel frustrated about this, but you can use your frustration in more positive ways. It sounds more like your love starved, then sex starved. It's the release, and that wonderful moment after you experience having sex together you feel the closest to your partner. The biological explanation for this is a little hormone called oxytocin. It's a hormone released during, and after sex so that it bonds the couple. It's nature's insurance policy to make sure we don't walk out on the people we love because it's much easier to raise children as a team, then solo, and there is less of a risk for them getting sick, or hurt in the wild.
Though it's the 21st century, and they're tons of single parents, and all different kinds of family's, nature is still under our skin and that hormone is and probably will always be produced. It literally bonds us to the one we have sex with. On a more romantic level maybe there is something he does for you after sex that he doesn't do for you when you guys aren't having sex? You says he holds you, and makes you feel special. Does he do that when you guys aren't active? Is there anything he does for you during sex, emotionally, that he does not do when you guys aren't having sex? Maybe that can be the begging of your conversation. If you figure out what you might be missing, when your sitting down, in a calm environment, and when your ready you can begin to say,
"You mean the world to me, and I love you. I love especially when you do... (insert whatever you feel your missing here)... and I feel I really get that when we have sex. I don't want to push you, and it has to do with me. This isn't your fault, but I would love it, if I could get more of (that) when we're not active. It's something I really enjoy, and would love it if maybe we can do more of (that). If you don't want to talk about it I understand, I just want to work this out without fighting, because I love you too much to fight." It's hard to fight with someone who is coming at you in a peaceful loving way. So try something like that, if you would like to speak with him.
On ways for turning him on: He likes it spontaneous, so the best way to get him in the mood without really making it obvious is maybe through his senses. For example, studies show that there are certain smells that naturally get guys in the mood. Vanilla, Jasmine, Sandalwood, and Rose scents actually release hormones that get guys in the mood.
Specific foods, dark chocolate, anything containing chili, cinnamon, honey, avocados, almonds, celery, nutmeg asparagus, and so on.
Is there specific spots that turn him on, have you noticed any. Just touching those spots on the neck, or wherever can get him more in the mood. If he's stressed that's a perfect excuse to give him a message. A really fascinating spot is the ears. You'd be surprised how very lightly biting an ear can turn someone on.
Wear colors like red, which send natural signals to the brain through association. When people see the red they turn their attention to it, they think passion, fire, love. That's why we have red stoplights. Red is more likely to grab our attention. Women wearing red though sends a different message.
Also try not to have sex, a lot, and then have nothing. Space it out. Enjoy the anticipation, whenever that may be. Let him feel the frustration.
On an personal emotional level: To get over the frustration, friends, family, and pets are what you need. Does you mom cook something that makes you feel comforted. Even if it's a PB & J, or a mac and cheese.
Still got that old stuffed animal, or blanket somewhere that you used to obsesses over as a kid. Something you never got rid because of sentimental value? Do you have a pet you like to cuddle with. Friends you maybe can greet or say goodbye to with a hug? Random maybe, but doing those things can actually make you feel more loved on an emotional level, and produce that hormone of oxytocin.
Working out, daydreaming about your significant other, and maybe writing your feelings down, can allow you to release some of that frustration.
Remember the best way to get a guy in the mood, is to act like sex is the last thing on your mind. Even if it might be the first.
Good Luck! Best Wishes, and hope everything goes well :)
So I have been sexually active for several months, my boyfriend had a daughter at a young age and decided to get a vasectomy about a year ago. We don't use protection because we feel no need to. We usually have sex twice a day maybe 3-4 days out of the week. I have only been late once before in out relationship and that was back in may. Now I am two weeks late, no cramps or anything. I took a pregnancy test when I was two days late and it said negative. However the past few days any smell makes me nauseated and I keep getting nausea.I had cramps for maybe a day and then they just went away. I am curious if there is any chance? Because my father had a vasectomy and he had to go back in because it healed itself. I am just wondering if there is any possibility, my breasts have also been slightly tender.
The best possible way to find out if you are pregnant is to see your doctor, or a specialist. You never really know until then. I would suggest seeing a doctor because some pregnancy tests can say your negative one minute, and then the doctor does a more in depth test and you find out you are pregnant. Blood tests are usually the best way. Until then relax, and try not to count your eggs before they hatch. You don't want to worry about a baby you might not know exists. When you have to cross that bridge, then you can figure it all out. But I would say a doctor or GYN is your best bet :)
Best Wishes & Good Luck!
My Bestfriend is also my crush. We've gone to school together since elementary. In 6th grade he asked me out and I said yes. A couple weeks after i broke up with him because i wasnt ready for a relationship. Now in 8th grade, Im starting to have really deep feelings for him. He knows I like him but he doesn't feel the same way. What should I do? Should I wait for him? I'm 13 year old Girl and in 8th Grade. He's A Boy, 14, and in 8th also.
When things are meant to happen, they simply happen. It's one of the hardest lessons one has to learn. Unfortunately, if he doesn't feel the same way then there's not much you can do to change his mind. If you're meant to be with one another it will happen, but for now, as hard as it may be, you just have to let it go. You also have to realize if he doesn't like you then he doesn't know what he's missing. He's missing out on an amazing young woman, who is worth loving, and if he can't see that then he's not worth it. You have a lot of years a head to find someone who appreciates you for who you are. You won't have to wait for them, it will just happen.
So for now... i would say focus on being yourself, and truly realize how wonderful you are. Maybe he will see it then, but you can't force anything to happen, or anyone to like you, and you shouldn't wait around, because your a.) to cool to do that and b.) have too much self respect for that. One day a guy will see it, whether it will be him, or someone else even more special then him, and then letting things go, and letting fate do it's thing will seem so much more worth it, then waiting around for a boy who can't see that you're a diamond among pebbles.
Good Luck & Best Wishes!!!
I'm in a very serious long distance relationship and it's at the point where a trip doesn't fit in either of our schedules for a very long time...55 days.
I love him so much, but I feel sad and anxious a lot...
I was wondering if anyone had any songs that are helpful or calming for situations like this?
I've been in multiple long distance relationships. I don't know what genre of music you're into, so I'll give you a song from each genre:
Gym Class Heroes- Get Your Ass Back Home
Wish You Were Here- Hey Monday
Hey Baby- Stephen Marley
Hey Baby- Stephen Marley Feature Mose Def
Hey Baby- Stephen Marley Acoustic Version
Frozen Oceans- Shiny Toy Guns
I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles)- The Proclaimers
Many the Miles- Sara Bareilles
Jet Lag- Simple Plan Ft. Natasha Bedingfeild
Long Distance Love- Tamia
Have a Little Faith- Michael Franti & Spearhead
Please Mr. Postman- The Marvelettes
Your Still One- Shania Twain
Owl City Vanilla Twilight
Long Distance- Bruno Mars
Life House-You And Me
The Gossip - Love Long Distance & The same song but Fake Blood Remix
Whenever Wherever - Shakira
Cosmic Love- Florence and The Machine
Can't Hurry Love- Supremes
California King Bed- Rihanna
The Distance- Hot Chella Rea
Kiss Me Thru The Phone- Soulja Boy
So Far Away- Carole King
Stik Wit U- The PussyCat Dolls
Collide- Howie Day
Gloria- Michael Franti & Spearhead
Long Distance Relationship- Asia Cruise
It Won't Be Long- The Beatles
Jack's Mannequin- Bruised
Embrace- Shakira
Bring It Home- Little Big Town
A Thousand Miles- Vanessa Carlton
The Only Thing Missing Was You- Michael Franti & Spearhead
Aerosmith- I Don't Want to Miss a Thing
Down- Jay Sean
Where Are you Now- Michelle Branch
Secondhand Serenade- Your Call
International Love- Chirs Brown Ft. Pitbull
Telephone- Sheen Easton
I Miss You- Blink 182
Brandy- Long Distance
Beach Boys- Wouldn't it Be Nice
Avril Lavigne- Wish You Were Here
I'll Be Waiting- Michael Franti & Spearhead
I mixed some happy songs in there with the theme of being apart, or songs that can just help you get through the time you're apart so you don't worry and your not just listening to a bunch of sad songs! I hope you like it!!!
Good Luck & My Best Wishes!!! :)
I'm 19, female.
I'm looking to boost my sex drive... as far as wanting to have sex more and being able to get more wet naturally?
Is there a way to do this naturally? Exercises?
Or a vitamin, or pill?
I'm in a long term relationship and I love my boyfriend very much but I can sometimes sense his frustration when it takes so long to get me going.
Women take a very long time to get going. it's part of who they are. So don't feel bad about that. Exercising in general boosts your sex drive. Having Sex the day you go for a really good swim, run or cardio workout helps boost your libido naturally. Cardio allows you to pump blood to sex organs. From personal experiences, some of my best sexual experiences were after a good swim. Also genuinely relaxing for 15 minuets a day, weather it be yoga, mediation, or listening to your favorite relaxing songs, can prevent the increase of the stress hormone cortisol.
Now for some vitamins and Supplements. You should already be taking a multi vitamin once a day. Anything with Vitamin B5 is supposed to help with blood flow, so that's important. Also Vitamin E, which also helps in the production of sex hormones.
Before taking any of these natural supplements, please read the ingredients, to make sure you are not allergic to any of this. Also don't go crazy and O.D. or take them every time you have sex. Once and a while is okay, but not all the time. May I suggest Ginseng. Apparently studies has shown it increases blood flow in lower extremities, and increases women's sexual desire as well as blood flow. You can find it in your tea's or natural health food, or organic grocery store. Maca can also be used, as a natural vitamin, and has been studied on animals with positive results of increased sexual desire. And if you can get yours hands on this, it's called, "Horny Goat Weed". It heats women's body up and makes them extra sensitive. Best taken in tea form. Another natural supplement in Kava. It reduces stress and calms the mind. This is legal everywhere except in two countries, France and Canada. L_arginine, which you can actually get at Walgreens, is a natural viagra substitute. Most woman say getting it in cream form, and applying where it's needed helps a lot. Make sure that any creams being used, will not reduce the affects of any condoms.
So I hope that helped!! Remember that exercise, and a multivitamin is going to be your best natural option. And you don't have to worry about many side affects.
Best Wishes!
Okay, so I need to know how I can fix my situation for the better, is it fixable or how should I go about leaving. I have had a on/off boyfriend for about 3 years now, since 11th grade. He started off trying to talk to me when I had a previous relationship that i wasn't happy in. basically "saved" me and we fell in love from there. He gave me money, talked on the phone with me and made me feel so special. I met his family and everything. Soon things went downhill about 4 months into the relationship, he began breaking up with me to be in sexual relations with other girls. I spent a year trying to win him back. When he finally got back with me things were great. He never EVER put his hands on me. In the times we were broke up I did move on for some time keep in mind. He went to jail for about 4 months and i spent $500 on just calls alone. He gets out and I catch him cheating quite a few times. He assumes everything i do without him I'm cheating. He started threatening me slowly over time, slapping me, pushing me. I stayed. Last night i went to a friend's house without telling him and he found out and came and got me. Got a hotel room and slung me around, beat me, called me a hoe, good for nothing, and i have anxiety attacks, in the middle of one he said "big greedy ass.. what you need food?" he stole my pants (leaving me in a thong and tshirt so i couldn't go outside) and phone so i couldn't leave. I cried myself to sleep and he woke me up later saying he was sorry and told me about how he and his bother have been diagnosed with Bi Polar disorder. Some reason i can't go, even though i came out with a huge knot on my forehead, a swollen jaw, bruised nose, bleeding and bruises on my chest, multiple bruises on my arms and blood shot eyes/cheeks
I am so sorry about all of this. Yes, unfortunately no matter how much you may love him and care for him this relationship is extremely dangerous, and it would be best that you leave him. My mother was in an abusive relationship, and I used to come home thinking that she wasn't going to be there anymore. Let me tell you that it's extremely hard on everyone. Understand, that bi-polar or not he is endangering you, and could kill you even by accident if he hit you, or throws you the wrong way. Your life is, as dramatic as this might sound, at stake. The reason why he may physically attack you is because he feels out of control. When you left, he felt insecure, and so when he beat you he felt that he had complete control over you, so that made him feel like he had all the power. He used fear, and your love for him to manipulate you into letting you feel exactly the way he feels inside.
Let me tell you HE HAS NO CONTROL OVER YOU. You have all the control, and power, and you're the hero in your own destiny. Not him. You have to much self respect, and love for yourself and you shouldn't have to put up with this, and you should be very proud that you sought help on your own.
You may love him, be afraid to leave, or feel that something is holding you back, but please for your own life, and for those who truly love you, not just someone who wants get a power trip of physical abuse, you must not be afraid, and you must take a chance. So if you do choose to leave, and remember this is your choice, you know what's best for you, I suggest you must first reach out to a friend or family member, let them no what's going on. But be extremely calm, and quite about it. This needs to be someone you can trust with your life. You need to tell them that you need to stay with them for a while, and I'm sorry, but you have to call the police. Not only for your protection, because he will not come after you if you have protection, but also because he has assaulted you so he has broken the law.
When you do reach out to that someone make sure you leave when he's not around. He may be going out, or going to work, but make sure that he has no idea what's going on, and he'll be gone for at least an hour. You leaving should take 15 minutes max. Do this as quickly and calmly as possible. Don't pack anything openly, but make sure you know where any essentials, such as prescription drugs, or any passport/ bankcards, exactly they are. So just grab them and go. Don't worry about toiletries, or clothes. Those are all replaceable. So pack very lightly, even so much that it looks like you're not going anywhere.
Make sure you leave and maybe right before you're leaving or after you could call the police, or call 1−800−799−SAFE(7233) or TTY 1−800−787−3224. It's the National Domestic Violence Hotline. The police may escort him off the property, and bring him in for questioning. Please, make sure you are safe and with someone when this is going on.
Once you are safe and away from him, you can choose to speak with either a councilor, mentor, or therapist to help you not only get over him, but keep him far away from you and your life. There are plenty of groups that you can turn to support one another, and remember you are totally not alone. You have a lot more love around you then you think, and are extremely strong.
But again this all lies within your hands, so weather you choose to leave him, or not is up to you. But let me tell you again, be very proud that you spoke up! I am very proud that you sought help yourself, instead of staying quiet!
Best Wishes, Good Luck & Stay Safe!
15/f hes 15/m im a capricorn and hes a taurus if that means anything but it helps me. im going to try to make this as short as possible. anyway this guy i've been talking to for about a month we have a lot of classes together and we talk and text alot i feel like i've been best friends with him my whole life. we started talking and we found out that we are physically each others types and we wouldnt mind hooking up and being friends, since we already are, kinda like a friends with benefits thing. but then when we were gonna hang out and hook up, he suddenly couldnt so we were gonna hang out that week, so i was like ok (this was about a month ago) but i never got his text to hangout so then that day he told me over text that he likes me and kinda has feelings for me and i didnt tell him i liked him until two days later and but then he started getting kidna shady and it felt weird becasue he didnt ask me out or anything and still flirty with other girls, becasue thats how he is and he said he wasnt intrested in any of them. so i just told him flat out that i dont want this to be weird so lets go back to being friends and if we hook up then i guess it happens. then like two days ago i guess our feeling for each other never diminshed because he wouldnt tell me who he liked and said he would only tell me if i told him, becasue this time i think he was scared i would reject him becasue i told him i would probablly never want to be serious with him. and so the next day he finally told me how he felt that he still kinda has feelings for me and likes me. when he told me over text that he liked me it was bittersweet i guess you could say because i like him, we would hookup, i like him as a person/friend but then he just made things so complicated again! this is the whole reason i wanted to back to being friends again. so far i havent told him how i felt but the thing is what am i supposed to do? i dont think he's gonna ask me out, not that i want that, becasue im not sure if i want a relalitonship. but its like i dont get it like he likes me, he wants to hook up, were still frineds but no relationship, and i think i want the same..is that bad? BUT i havent seen him two days which is when he told me he like med, and he hasnt texted me in a day which is weird for him, and now i think he feels awkward because he said he liked me but i never told him that i liked him and now i dont know what to do before this get awkward and lose my friendship with him or something bad happens i dont know what to say to him? thanksss also i feel like im going crazy because i like him but he flirts with girls in front of me and then we get into fights and i just dont know what to do
Have you ever maybe thought that he flirts with girls in front of you, because he wants to see your reaction? He sounds like he does like you, but before you do the friends with bens thing, make sure that your both honest with your feelings. Are you really okay with not committing? Can you imagine him hooking up with you, and then him hooking up with another girl in front of you, or visa versa? You may want ask him seriously if he's willing to start a real relationship with you. In the end your feelings will aways be your feelings, and the decisions you make won't change them, but may help. So if you decide to remain friends make sure it's what you really want. If you want to take a chance, remember that in any relationship it's a risk of fighting, and getting hurt. You have to accept that, and way the pro's and con's. So speak to him about it, after you decide what you really want. Remember that in any situation feelings will develop, and expressing those feelings in a healthy way is what will make your friendship and relationship stronger, and remember don't be afraid to get your feelings hurt, or something bad happening. I've read that feelings getting hurt is a good thing believe it or not, it means we've tried for something wonderful.
Good Luck & Best Wishes!!!
ALrighty well Im 13/f and I have had 2 boyfriend before but all I ever did with them and I layed the barriers was we kissed and thats it. Nothing further. I have liked this guy who we can call Sam since the beginning of the summer (he is 12/m). We flirted and talked all summer and on August 19th, we admitted to each other that we liked each other more than a friend. The next day, I left for my cottage. I got no reception up north so I had to due with not talking to him for a week. When I got back from my cottage, he started ignoring me. Im not sure what happened. It was as if I didnt exist or was invisible or something =/ I really started to like him more and more each day. I reread all of our old conversations from the summer and cried myself to sleep almost everynight. (Please no comments of my age and dating people). He ignored me for a bit more than a month. On October 5th, I got off the bus with one of my friends and he got off at the same stop with his friend. We all ended up meeting at the park and what ended up happening is that I sat on his lap on a swing since there was none left and he had his arms around me and we were laughing and smiling as if he didnt ignore me for the past month. He walked me home after it got late and held my hand the entire way. He also gave me a hug. I didnt think it was possible for us to get so close within a few hours. That whole weekend, we hung out. But, on October 9, he mustve changed his mind again. He ignored me again. Im not even sure why!!! He is always on my mind and I think about him day and night. I look at the pictures we took together everynight and try to sleep but have to cry myself to sleep all the time. It hurts me to see him at school so happy with his friends. But then, the other day, I was hanging out with my friends (the popular group) and we were walking over to these benches at our school to sit and Sam, and two of his friends walked over and sat on one of them and these younger grades were on the other. We decided to sit on the ground instead. Then, Sam decided to throw a rock at me and get my attention. We threw rocks back and forth and he was smiling at me and laughing and I saw him like he was when we hung out that weekend and in the summer. He left for a hockey tournament yesterday and now I just dont know what to do. Im chasing my dreams though no matter what. I have a good feeling about him. My friends say to wait one more year until highschool but I dont wanna. I like Sam alot! So what do u think I should do? I have seriously given you alot of info here so I need some opinions? Please help!!!
Hello!!!
It might not be that he doesn't like you back, it sounds like he does, but you won't know where he stands unless you ask him about his feeling for your himself. I know that a lot of girls want the guy to come up to him, but maybe it's best that you ask him because it seems you can't wait anymore. I would suggest getting him alone, and putting yourself out there. It's a risk, but it's better to know. Keep an eye on the one minute he ignores you, and the next your best friends. You can ask him why he does that, but don't say it like, "Why do you ignore me sometimes?", say, "I get the feeling that sometimes you don't want to speak to me, did I do something wrong?" I hope it works our amazingly well, and remember that you deserve the world, so if he doesn't like you, then he's blind :)
Best Wishes & Good Luck!
12F, Okay so theres this guy at my school and i like his personality A LOT and hes really cute right so today we had a silent dismisal for this thing going on at my school. The busses had beeen late and we were talking and tazzering (like tickling) each other and then i go to give him a high five with both hands and he grabbs them and huggs me and touched my ass he has done this before. He had also been play fighting with me and grabbed my leg and was walking around playing with me not in a sexuall way.
P.S.he is 13.
How exciting! Sounds like he does. Just remember that liking someone in a physical way is different then liking you in an emotional way. Make sure for it goes both ways! For example make sure he that he doesn't like your ass more then your personality. Also you won't know until you ask him right?? So one day when you guys are alone, ask him if he likes you. Good Luck and hope this helps!!
Best wishes!!!
I'm 19, female, and a virgin.
I'm a bit worried... I plan on losing my virginity to my long time boyfriend soon. I can tell it's headed there and I'm starting to feel more and more ready. HOWEVER, I have some fears...
I masturbate occasionally... but not much... it just doesn't do much for me. I can't really get myself wet and me touching ME doesn't really turn me on. I often just can't get off to fantasy land because I'm just too preoccupation with how frustrated I am and how sub-par it feels...
But... I feel like sex will be much better?
It it common for a girl not to be able to get too turned on when she's on her own but still have amazing sex with a partner because there's an actual person touching you opposed to touching yourself?
I'm worried I won't be able to get wet enough during sex. My boyfriend has been very respectful and we haven't really done anything besides kissing so I just don't know. Also, he took a semester off from school to be with family so we're separated for now. But just a text from him can turn me on more than trying to imagine sex I've NEVER had during masturbation...
Also, I tried using a small dildo and it just feels like a cold, uncomfortable object inside me... even if I move it in and out.
***Is sex better than masturbating once you get comfortable with it?
I guess in my mind I'm kind of comparing it to being tickled. I cannot tickle myself because it feels like nothing... but when someone else tickles me I'm a mess of laughter...
Is it kind of the same thing?
Hello!!!
Okay so... masturbation and sex are two different things from the same family tree.
I have heard mixed reviews, some people believe that masturbation is better, because you know what you like, and how to do it. Some people says that sex is 10x better because you are with someone you care about. Some people say either way is good for them. May I suggest a vibrator and K.Y. Jelly if you want to try masturbating before you have sex. Some vribrators are expensive, but I know, and this may sound weird, but a lot of girls use vibrating toothbrushes that you can get for cheap at any drugstore. No one will think twice about you buying one lol!! Because you haven't had actual physical sex with your boyfriend, you don't know how it's going to be exactly, you can only imagine. The first time for every girl, is a little uncomfortable, and it may be hard to orgasm, so I would suggest if he's better option for getting you off, then you should probably let him do it, right before you make physical contact with him.
Masturbation tip: Make sure you're stimulating your clitorus, which makes a world of a difference on allowing yourself to get turned on and having a good experience. Women rarely orgasm from just vaginal contact, so focus on your cltiorus when your boyfriend says something that turns you on try it then. If not then it's totally fine! Different strokes for different folks. It's okay to have amazing sex with your partner, and not like masturbation as much. Eventually you'll begin to understand and know your own body, so just enjoy what you have with your boyfriend. hope this helped!
Best Wishes!!
Hi. So I'm 13 and I'm a normal girl from Singapore. I have no idea how I'm going to go about expressing my problem, but here it is: I have tutoring classes in the weekends that I have been skipping for three weeks, without my mum's knowledge. Moreover, I have tickets to a concert I'm going to with my friends. It costs $218 and I don't have enough money to pay for it. I have told my mom about this before and she flared up and said that I cannot go for the concert. Thus, now, I'm not going for the concert, and I haven't told my friends yet. Does anyone have advice on this matter? My mom found out yesterday that I have been skipping classes and she's obviously angry, saying that (and I quote) "Four lessons can pay for your tickets to the concert!" (Yeah, I don't understand too) please leave some advice.
Hello Hello!!!
You are certainly not a bad teenager!!! Please, I used to do crazier things then that when I was 13!!! If anything you are certainly a normal teenager, and you have a strong will within you, even if you don't see it yet!
There are two things you can do. Write a letter to your mom, and stick it under her pillow or something, apologizing. You'd be surprised how mom's fall for that. Don't write anything bad, or try to make it seem like it wasn't your fault, but just be sincere and apologize, and tell her thank you for her concern and you know she loves you (totally corny, but it does seem to warm a mothers heart). She's just worried for your future, and yes that can be the most annoying thing in the world, but trust me it's a mom thing. So apologizing, and starting to go back to those darn tutoring sessions, is probably one step in the right direction. Not only will it help the relationship with your mom, but it will help yourself, and maybe even getting what you want in the future :)
About the concert... Talk to your mom negotiate, ask her if there is anything you can do for her, or if you can do chores for a week, or something she needs in exchange for concert tickets. If your mom still says no, even after the letter, and the negotiations, then you must fess up to your friends tell them you thought you could win her over, but she's not gonna let you go. You have every right to be angry about it, but there will be many more concerts, and experiences with your friends. She and you both know it's only a matter of time before you start doing your own things, and having the cash to buy your own concert tickets, so don't worry, things always have a way of working out, even if we have to work really hard for them too.
Best Wishes & Good Luck!!!
Im 26 year woman from India. i faced a miscarriage before 7 month. i was continue sly trying to be back in a normal life but,everything is getting worst. Now i always think to either kill myself or my hubby as I'm not able to forget his and his parents bad behavior with me during my pregnancy. But as both the things are not possible for me, so just getting mad day by day. Its very easy for people to say "move on" but its not that much easy for me.
I am so sorry for your loss, nothing hurts a mother more then loosing her child. Especially when there is so much pressure from your family, and your husband to simply forget, and "move on". You can never forget and move on, it's impossible. But you will heal, through lots of faith, and love. Healing does not mean forgetting though.
Coming from a background where my mother also felt she could not leave my father, that her situation was impossible, and my father's family was also very tough on her, I know how hard this all can be. If you choose to stay, I would suggest creating an outlet for yourself. Maybe you can write, paint, knit, cook do anything you truly love to bring you a sense of happiness. Know that nothing is forever, and what you're going through right now will not last forever. The only thing permanent, is change. You have so much more power then you think you do, and more importantly you must make a decision that is best for you. If you are slowly slipping into a depression, then you need go to someone you can love and trust, and talk about these feelings. If you feel you need to seek professional help, then do not be ashamed. Your strength is already showing, because you are strong enough to talk about your feelings.
A lot of your feelings are not only caused by your environment, but also hormones. Because you were pregnant, your body still has prepared for that, and because you have lost the baby, again your body is doing what it does naturally and flooding you with hormones. Some women who have lost their children, suffer postpartum depression. You could be going through that as well. Give your body and your mind time to heal. It may be a challenge, but I believe, and have faith that you can do this, you have strength and power, and are a strong woman, so you can fight for your happiness.
If you want to go on the path, of fighting against all odds, and try to divorce your husband know that it will be a hard decision to make, and bear with. It will be a challenge, but know that nothing can stand in the way from you and your happiness, and anyone who tells you different is out of their minds. I send you lots of happy thoughts, and positive energy, and again please stay strong. I am very sorry, and hope this advice helped, even if it was only a little bit :)
Best Wishes & नमस्ते!
i am hoping to make an action figure of Neil Diamond for free so any suggestions maybe
I saw a movie over the summer called "Marwencol", where a man who suffered a serious accident, decided to create action figures as an emotional outlet for himself, by making action figures! He also did it on a very low budget! He is amazingly creative, a famous artist, and you should look him up if you're interested.
It's hard to do it all for free. Cheap I can help you, because you need the materials :)
I would say, because Neil Diamond is very attractive ... Go with a Ken Doll. Preferably one you think best suits Neil Diamond. You can either buy ken doll clothes on amazon or e-bay, or if you're feeling really ambitious you can make your own clothes and ken dolls." Knit Fashion Model Doll Clothes Knitting Patterns for Fashion Dolls - Vintage Doll Clothing Patterns to Knit" is a book on amazon that you can use. If you're going for the older Neil Diamond look, I would say buy a ken doll with plastic black hair, then get a Valspar all-purpose spray paint in Grey, you can even get a cheaper one. Cut thin pieces of masking tape, and put it on sections of the "hair" you want to stay black, then spray away, making sure you cover his face and body with a wash cloth, or rag! You should get a salt and pepper look! You can even buy a few oil based paints to fill in his eyebrows, or even some magic markers, or some grey permanent ones. A guitar on e-bay for $12.00 here's the link, if it won't open type in google mini guitars. They have some for cheap. If you want his original black guitar I would say oil paint that as well, so it gets a nice shine.
here;s the link:
http://www.ebay.com/itm/Acoustic-Guitar-Miniature-Lapel-Tack-Pin-with-Case-Real-Wood-Hand-Crafted-/290806208827?pt=Guitar_Accessories&hash=item43b566993b
I hope this helps! Sorry this advice wasn't for something completely free, but I hope I at least helped aim for a project under $100 :)
Good Luck & Best Wishes!!
I'm 21 years old and I've been on the pill since I was a freshman in college, I'm now a senior in college.
For about two years I was on ortho tri cylen lo and it was fine for a while but then I noticed it started giving me horrible pms and I would be so irritable atleast a week after my period.
The end of my sophmore year my doctor changed my birthcontrol to Yaz and I've been on that since and I am on it now. I gained weight from it (not a crazy amount) but I've noticed it's been much harder to lose weight while on this pill.
I've heard a lot of people drop weight easier when they aren't on the pill or when they stop taking it.
I didn't have an issue with weight loss on Ortho Tri cylen lo because I think the dosage was lower? hormone wise? I don't know really, but Yaz it has definitely been an issue.
I am sexually active with my serious boyfriend. We don't use condoms because I'm on the pill and I take it regularly and I know what they say yada yada about the pill isn't 100% effective, it has been for me.
I don't want to go off the pill and rely just on condoms because that seems risky, and I've heard good things about IUDs but I'm concerned about just having a thing up there.. you know?
I will talk to my doctor this week but I just wanted some opinions from females. If any of you girls had issues with weight loss from a certain pill or weight gain, and if getting off the pill or switching to different one helped?
Thanks XOXO
Hello! Hello!!
I love birth control talk, because it's like shoe shopping. There's so much to choose, and you want to know which is better for you, or what's more comfortable, or which pair makes you look better.
Weight gain is a common problem with birth control. Yaz is actually a low dosage of estrogen, and for you it seems it has given you the side affect of water retention, which means your body is literally trying to hold on to your water, because:
A.) Your body thinks you are pregnant, even though you really aren't (thus concludes the magic of birth control), so it may want to hold on to certain things for the baby the doesn't exist.
B.) New birth control pills may raise insulin levels. Insulin's the stuff that burns off sugar, so when those levels rise, and you may have a bagel in the morning or any type of carb, then those carbs get distributed to fat cells. Therefor creating that awful, you're doing everything you can, but you can't drop that little bit of weight affect.
C.) Their is a direct relationship between how much estrogen that little monster has, and how much water is retained. Therefor, the more estrogen the more water. Why? Because estrogen actually stimulates some compounds in the kidneys that can lead to fluid retention.
True. Story.
So one way to combat this is ask your doctor for something that has less estrogen Another is to follow a diet that is low in carbs. So eat a little more protein a vegetables. So have eggs, or steel cut oatmeal in the morning, have a salmon salad in the afternoon, with a side of fresh fruit, and maybe Burbon Chicken, a salad and frozen yogurt for dinner. If you're going to have carbs may I suggest whole wheat anything! Way easier to digest, and a great source of fiber, so you can minimize that little problem area on the stomach that all women have... trust me. It took me a while to get mine someone minimized, and it just won't ever go away.
But yes, good decision on checking with the doctor.IUD's are a controversial thing. Some women love it, but you must acknowledge the risk before you decide to go with it as a new form of birth control. The shot is also something that contains weight gain, and the patch is something people don't seem to gain as much weight on but that's because it also has norelgestromin (I know, weird word) that helps share the work, along with estrogen. But you may not be able to wear the patch for other medical reasons, so really it's what you and your doctor think is best. I know girls who love the pill, but then I know a girl who said she hadn't lived till the patch, and another girl who said the IUD was wonderful, and extremely comfortable.
You can fact check this stuff with your doctor as well, and ask if there are any more options you can go for, as well as go for a check up, and maybe even a blood test if you're due for one. You'd be surprised how something like weight gain on the pill is actually a warning sign for something else going on that's undetected. But I'm sure everything is fine. So many more girls gain weight on oral pills then the medical field likes to admit.
Good Luck & Best Wishes!!!
My boyfriend Brian and I have dated for a year now. Everything in the realationship is great and everything but there's one thing that my parents and myself worry about: the drive to work. We worked at the same supermarket for a month then he quit because he said that he felt stressed there. U wasn't going to argue with him if he felt that way so he quit. But I worried that in the future if and when we take a further step into the.relationship if he's going.to still lack that drive to work. I love him, he's such a sweet guy, romantic respectful everything. And he tells me he wants to work but when he applies no one ever calls him.
What should I do??
I don't plan on breaking up with him...
Help
17/f 18/m
Hello!!
It's natural to worry about a guy you like not having any ambition, you want him too, so you can create a life together, but I think the real thing to focus on is has he found something that he's passionate enough about, to work for? That might be the drive he's missing; the passion. Also make sure that his choices aren't affecting yours, that you continue to hold on to your drive.
His life is not yours. You have a lot ahead of you, and you have to accept that most of your ambitious plans for yourself, may not be his. You can't force him to change, he has to want to change on his own. If that's his only vice then figure out is it a big enough to impact your relationship. Do you need to be with someone that has constant drive? Or can you focus on yourself, and be with someone who's more willing to be laid back in the work field?
When you decide to take your step further, and he hasn't been putting any work out, or even making an incentive to work towards his passion, then you have to make a decision, and be very clear with him, that it might not be the best situation if you end up supporting him. You have to be honest with him, and let him know how you feel. If he loves you, then he'll at least hear you out.
So the real question is not does he have the drive to work, but does he have the drive to work with you? If he does then you must make sure you go for whatever dreams you have, without his choices affecting yours.
Best!
-L
15/f
So, there's a guy that I'm friends with that I've known for about 4 years, but we weren't really friends till a couple months ago. He randomly started messaging me on Facebook, then he pulled the "I'm getting off Facebook, what's your number?" stunt, so I have him my number (we're friends). This was a week ago, and now he texts me every single day, from the hour after school gets out till he goes to bed. I don't mind the texting, cuz I enjoy talking to him. I like him, but only as a friend. Anyway, he has been sending VERY flirtatious texts, and has told me multiple times that I'm sexy and very attractive, and that I'm his type. I've just said thank you. Then, he's asked me if he's attractive back, and I didn't want to be mean so I said yes (he IS attractive, I just don't like him that way) He's been flirting with me over text, and I've been unintentionally flirting back, but I haven't explicitly said anything about liking him.
Tonight, when he was going to bed and saying goodnight, he said that he liked me. However, it was in a longer text, so I sort of ignored that part and just filled my response with a bunch of "hahahahas" and ;). The thing is, this guy is pretty cute and he's really nice and smart, and I probably would go out with him, except there's another guy that I'm really good friends with that I have a massive crush on. I don't want to go out with the one that likes me because I like the other guy. Basically, I dont want to give this guy a chance in a relationship because then the guy I like will think I'm not interested.I'm certain this guy will mention that he likes me again, over text. How do I say I don't like him? And how do I respond to his flirty texts without flirting back? Thank you!
I have been in a situation where a guy had gotten the wrong impression because I would come over to use his air hockey table. Boys can be really dense sometimes, especially if they like someone. They want to believe so bad that the other person feels the same way. The best thing for you to do it stop the winking, the flirting, cool off for a while. If he texts you, try to keep it as platonic as possible. Then you have to be honest and say, you know I enjoy speaking to you, and I consider you a great friend, but I don't want to lead you on because you're a great person! I like you as a friend, but I don't see it going farther then that. I'm sorry, but you deserve honesty, and that's honestly how I feel. It's really easy to unintentionally give someone the wrong impression, so just be really clear with him! If he's mature he'll get over it, and you can move on to the boy you have a massive crush on, but remember it's not your fault you feel a certain way, and there isn't really much you can do about it, except try to be mature and honest. It's okay if you feel bad, but you can't let that stop you from not only being honest with him, but being honest with yourself :)
Good Luck & Best Wishes!!