askImperfectionist
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Q: Ok, so here is a strange question for you: I asked my brother what he most wanted for his birthday and he said just that: "A bolt carrier group would be nice." Now here is the problem: I don't know what that is. Yes, I searched it on google, yes I found a picture in image search, and no, even looking at it I have no idea in the world where you would buy one or what exactly it is. Anyone know what I should do?
I know it's some sort of accessory for rifles or something along that line. But really I would just google it and click the shopping tab.

Q: My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 2 years. Today is my 23rd birthday and he didn't even get me anything. I don't even want much just something to feel special but no. We have a long distance relationship and I had a party Saturday that he wasn't able to come to because he couldn't afford the 500$ ticket but he was able to go out that night and spend over 100$ on drinks. He told me he feels like an awful boyfriend but then today on my birthday he tells me he's going to the casino on Thursday... So I'm guessing he doesn't feel that awful. On his birthday I made a huge deal I sent him a care package, visited him, and bought dinner and some other things for dessert. But he can't even send a card or anything. Am I just over thinking this and being a brat? Or is it time to rethink my involvement in this one sided relationship
You are not overthinking it at all. And i'm going to assume you are in a military relationship from what I read (me too, wooooo Milsos!!!) And you are not being a brat my birthday is in welp less than two weeks and I don't expect to hear a happy birthday or recieve a present because that's not only how my s/o is but with the long distance thing sometimes s/o's just don't show us the appreciation or attention we need and crave because we are so far apart from each other. and as Adviceman said this happens a lot, this is why people get lonely in long distance relationships. this is why there is so much cheating stereotypes in military relationships. BECAUSE it's so common for one person to kind of forget the other sometimes. and even in some situations both people sort of forget about the other sometimes. I honestly think you should say something to him, don't hold it back because communication emotionally is so important when you are in a military relationship because half the time you aren't even sure how your S/O feels about anything because they have to keep up this guard and distance.
I really do hope everything works out for you. and something I've learned as a military girlfriend we go through some things and some emotions that no one who hasn't been in our position will ever understand so stay strong.

Q: so my really close friend was taking to my other friend and my other friend say "oh I have a lot of pimples" and my close friend said "u must have gotten them from rose" should I confront my close friend?
Hell yeah that's rude. that's your close friend, she shouldn't be making comments like that. Now i'm not saying go whoop her butt or start screaming at her. ask her why she said that and tell her how it made you feel.

Q: I have a friend who is way to jealous.. thinks its ok for her to do stuff and not her husband. we are all cool and hang out although my boyfriend knew I had went to a friends house to hang out with him without the wife there. she dont know bc she is crazy and she would flip out if she new I was there without her.. she has flipped out once before acting like she was goin to throw things.. she dont even like her husband watching t.v bc she's that jealous. She has been caught talkn to her ex. but yet accuses her husband of doing this or that when he is innocent. What advice should i give my friend to help him out.
She is probably very insecure and there might be some other issues in there relationship that you aren't aware of nor is it your business. And there also might have been some relationships in the past for her that made her that way. I do have to say you as a woman shouldn't hang out with a woman's husband especially if she is a friend alone without her knowing because that puts you in a very bad position and if I walked in on my friend and husband alone, I don't give a damn if they were planning my surprise birthday party, I'm going to be on high alert and me personally i'm a firecracker so I would have freaked. Another reason that she could be that way is because she's the one cheating. A lot of people do that. control the other and act like they are always doing something wrong when they are the ones doing it. It's a disgusting hypocritical trait and if you know that is what your friend is doing, as a friend you need to tell her that is not right. especially if you have a friendship with the husband. otherwise I'd leave this issue alone unless your friend comes to you for advice on how she acts.

Q: Today I was taking my dog out for a walk and this other dog came out of no where from behind us. My dog turned around and lunged at her and did this teeth snapping thing twice. Eventually the owner came and got their dog while I was pulling to get my dog away from the other dog. I had to pick my dog up and walk away (She's big and heavy.) I just want to know what it means. She snapped twice at the air, and the poor dog that came from behind looked like she was really excited to see my dog.
Well I mean it really depends on your dog. Your dog might have been worried about your safety or just wasn't a fan of that dog in particular. Because I don't know your dog that could be how your dog plays. But also keep in mind some dogs just don't like other dogs or get along with them. So that is also a possibility.

Q: I'm adopting a black domestic short-hair kitten from a nearby rescue, and I was wondering if I should get one or two of them. We have two kids who should be mature enough to care for a pet, and a medium-sized house. I'm a stay-at-home parent, so the kitten(s) wouldn't be alone too much. We already have a kitten picked out (short black fur with a white patch on her neck), and are planning to name her Kia. So, now we just need to decide if we should get a second kitten. There are five other kittens in the litter (two black boy kittens, two black girl kittens, and a white girl), who all seem to have pretty good bonds with each other. So, should we get another kitten? (We are well aware of the costs of having a cat) If yes, which one should we pick, and what would be a good name? Any suggestions would be great. Thank you.
I would definitely get two if you feel like it's not a problem or issue to your family. I would probably get two of the same sex because even though they are from the same litter (aka siblings)...animals aren't like humans and they well... i don't want to go further into that because it's honestly gross. Like the one person said though talk to the rescue people because they should be able to tell you which kittens have been getting along and haven't. And for the name I say let the kids pick the name.

Q: I have so many on my thighs and it's getting hotter outside, I'm gonna want to wear shorts! But... My stretch marks are really getting to me, it makes me feel uncomftable showing legs.
Anyone know any good ways to help them fade?
I know that they stay for life once you have them, I don't need reminding :)
Thankyou x
Everyone has stretch marks, scars, and etc. you shouldn't feel ashamed but it's understandable you shouldn't feel that way but we all do have something we feel insecure and uncomfortable about it. They have creams for that stuff or even patting bits of makeup (powder like bronzer or just regular face helps) mostly I'd just do some basic leg exercises every morning and night before bed. Like putting on your headphones for a half an hour and just walking in place is really all you need to start toning up those areas.

Q: My sister hates me, has all my life. I'm a lady in my late 50's and she a couple years younger. We have lived different lives but I am as nice as I can be to her. Anyway, she is turning every friend I have against me. She even turns family from me if she can. I think she must lie about me. She tells my facebook friends things I done 10-20 years ago when I was young and single but dumb stuff, you know. I barely have a friend left. What in the world do I do. I'm on a chemo pill 4 times a week and have alot of health problems. I have nobody but my brother and she is working on him. I just don't get it. She is married to a husband with a good job, she doesn't have to work, has 3 grown up kids that are doing good and 3 grandkids. I live alone in a one bedroom apt in a big city with no family of my own. The major difference in us though is that I'm always happy. She broods all the time. I really wish she would look at all she has. I just don't get it.
What I'm going to say might differ from a lot of people but to me family don't mean sh*t. I grew up on my own. I had "family" and people who considered themselves friends but i've always stood alone and threw that I learned family will not always be there for you and it's okay to not like them even hate them because at the end of the day all they have is some matching particles of DNA.
You both are older women and the fact she still acts like this is a problem. She has issues. All the stuff you did was then, you grew up, you changed. she still stuck in that same kid mentality and will never be satisfied in life that way. Block her off facebook, tell her you're done. And talk to your friends tell them that's not you anymore if they are real friends, they'll stick around. And confront her. I don't care if you do it in front of the whole family call her out on her B.S. because life is short as you already know and there is no reason you should have to live with her trying to reck your life like she has been and since people want to think she is innocent in it why not blow up and let them all know NO SHE'S NOT! But at the end of the day... really all I want you to do is stick up for yourself. Don't take how she is treating you. She's too old for all that. And if you have to cut her off or feel like you should but think you shouldn't because she is "family", don't think like that.

Q: Hello advicenators,

I am going to be buying a "new used" car pretty soon. I got a new job recently and I will be able to afford the payments. Im looking to spend somewhere in the $18-25,000 range. I don't want to buy something I'll regret with that amount of money. I have never bought from a dealership before.

What are some tips? What are some things I should look out for (Any salesmen tricks I should be wary of, or extra things that I shouldn't be paying for?) I'm a girl in my 20s that knows pretty much nothing about cars (other than how to fill up oil and change a tire-the basics) and I totally expect to be taken advantage of when it comes to cars. I'm not stupid but there's a lot of car stuff I don't know.

So anything helps, really. I'm going to do some test drives this weekend. I've researched and decided on a couple of different makes and models based on extensive internet searches and reviews. I would like to be prepared before I go.

Thank you!
Well I didn't buy my car, mine was given to me but I am saving up now to buy another and have been looking around due to an issue I'll cover in a minute. So to start I pretty much just googled tips, ideas, good advice. But my dad also knows alot about this subject too so I'll cover what he said to me.
Off google I found a list of dealer reviews... http://www.edmunds.com/dealer-reviews/. Also Look at not just the amount you'll be paying for the car to buy it but how much it will cost you per month and I would escpecially pay attention to how much mileage is already on the car if you are buying used. Really you should just look at this edmunds.oom site because it has a lot of the info I can offer you and more. This helps you pick out what kinda car you NEED not want. www.edmunds.com/car-buying/10-steps-to-finding-the-right-car-for-you.html.
For my dad he wants me to take our mechanic who is a family friend (so take someone who knows cars well and can look around at the car) when I finally do decide the car. I've also done research on any of the cars I've been looking into. looking up the user manuals, the reviews, the commons issues, and the service prices for when my car needs to get serviced. of course make sure you test drive don't be scared to test drive as many as you want while you are at the dealership, their job is to sell you a car and test driving so you can see how your future car will ride is an important component in picking.
If you do end up finding the car you really want the best part about research it is looking up the kind of pricing for it because you can find the value of your car so you don't get ripped off. So it's fine if you go to the dealership, find the cars you want. make a list then go home and research them. if you're sure on the one you want next time you go bring your friend or whatever who knows the car then. don't worry about sales tricks and stuff. if you are easily influenced and stuff yeah you probably should worry but for me when sales people are talking and I know they are just trying to get a sale (which most are) instead of caring what the customer needs...i tune them the hell out.

Q: http://s1189.photobucket.com/user/mikafae/media/263376_499768680072896_917131201_n.jpg.html?sort=3&o=1


thanks!
Curly. It highlights your face shape in a good way.

Q: So i am 15 Years old, and people in my year have started becoming more sexual. There is a guy i know and like who wants to do more than kissing but i am too insecure about my vagina to do anything. It hangs down alot and im worried he will be grossed out. Help:(
First of all, don't worry about what everyone else is doing. Worry about yourself. If you don't feel ready, don't do anything you aren't ready for. Especially because everyone else is doing it. And if the guy is pressuring you, tell him to kick the bucket. Hard. And as a girl who has happened to have had sexual experiences with other girls I can tell you, you probably are thinking too much into your vagina's appearance. It's easy to be a bit insecure about that area. But just like everything else private parts come in varieties and when you do finally feel ready I'm sure the other person involved won't be judging.

Q: I just found out it wasn't just a movie! Where can I watch the original series episodes?
I have to agree with Angela when it comes to applauding you on wanting to watch the series after watching the movie because the movie is not even close to as good as the series. You can watch it on demand if you have xfinity and it comes on Nick all the time. You can also find it on most anime websites online like lovemyanime.net/ and then when you are done there is a new series playing off that called legend of korra which I just finished on dubbedepisodes.org/

Q: Coke head is being a little harsh. But one of my best friends jumped into a relationship a few weeks after ending a really long relationship. The guy was nice enough when I first met him and I'm happy if she's happy. Until I found out that he does coke "every now and then." It really disgusts me because I come from a family with three brothers who are drug addicts. (Luckily they don't do it anymore but still hate any kind of hard drug.)
He tells her that he won't do it anymore and she keeps saying she has no reason to not believe him yet. But I'm just worries about her. I know she's a big girl and can make up her own mind but it makes me have a dislike towards him, which may not be fair to him-but I'm only human and trying to process my feelings towards the situation. So I don't really ask her questions about him and when she brings him up I listen but don't really ask questions so I think she knows I'm not his number one fan. Which makes me sad cause she's my best friend and I feel as if we are creating a wedge in our friendship. They hang out literally everyday and night and she rarely has time to hang out anymore. I know this is life and being 22 means it's only gonna get worse as far as seeing friends go because everyone will get married as I age. I'm also in a long distance relationship so it's hard being far from him and feeling lonely at the same point sometimes.
I really just wish she was better about fitting me into her life still because I do miss her and care about her. At least in her old relationship she was good about making time for me and her girlfriends.
Honestly talk to her. tell her pretty much everything you just said...but don't call him a coke head. I have a history of addicts in my life and I totally understand the not being a fan of him or being a fan of those type of people. If she is your friend, she'll understand why you are a little iffy because you've seen what addiction can do to people and how addicts can effect everyone around them. With that being said try to be there for her anyway because you are her friend and it's the best thing you can do. Try to get to know him or at least on a civil level. Be there for her when she needs you and watch him to make sure he doesn't drag her down the path with him.

Q: hi im male 16 can any 1 tell me how to masterbate and waht happens when i it my male orgazam
Erm welp. I'm a girl and I'm pretty sure men masturbate by stroking their ummm weinerschnitzel. It's all over tv and movies and porn. From my understanding socks, magazines, the bathroom, and lotion are usually involved. But i'm more than sure you just stroke it.

Q: I work with a guy that comes to work drinking starts complaining and making facial expression at me no matter what I do or don't do....I do what I am suppose to do he has his own work to do but feels if we are not helping him....we are goofing off....we are only obliged to help him if nothing else is on the table....I also have other duties now which he seems to resent and complains about me and rolls his eyes....from what I understand it is a form of bullying should I come right out and ask him what his problem is? I do my fair share he would like everyone else to do his work....he only likes you if you do he is very childish and when hes not there everyone comments on how nice the employee morale is.
If he is making you uncomfortable, say something. Do something. Even pull him to the side and call him out on his sh*t. It's hard to find a job now adays and if he isn't even working or even wants his job, remind him he could lose it and someone who will work and want it will take it. But the reason why I think you should pull him to the side is he might be going through something. I use to be a heavy drinker. I worked at Walmart and I thought instead of letting the stress of the job and some other things, I could just drink before and after work and I'd be "okay". Result I had a breakdown and quit.
So what i'm saying is talk to your coworker try to be there for them.

Q: I really like this guy that sit next to me in
My 2nd period.let's say his name is jay.he makes me laugh.he's funny,cute,everything.he flirts with me !!! ( a lot actually ). Sometimes, he said i am his best friend to his's guy friends ( which we aren't). He would touches my hair, makes fun of my name, hugs me tight.last night, he texted me and asked if I'd like to go to the movies ( that time i was at the mall & i was bushing and ppl looked at me like I'm crazy lol).Before i even got to replied his text, he said his girlfriend moved to another state ( he never told me that he has a gf ). It just breaks my heart into pieces. I almost cried 😢 and i said,"not tonight maybe next time ?" And he said," ohh okey it's fine". I also felt like i am his second's option. And I'm afraid to see him on monday ( btw me & him are sophomore )
Maybe he really does think of you as a close friend, I've had guy friends most of my life. Even my best friend now is a guy and pretty much what you described has been most of our friendship. Hopefully the flirting part is just part of his personality meaning to him he's sees it as harmless. And the fact that he mentioned a gf is kind of a sign that he really does see you as a friend. BUT.
Playing devil's advocate here there is always the possibility he does like you. And even threw in the gf card to see how you'd react. If that's so be careful. Someone who can have feelings or even try to get with someone else while in a relationship will do the same thing to you.

Q: The other night I had a dream that I was sat with my boyfriends parents talking to them. The next day, I saw my boyfriends auntie and she came over to me telling me she had a dream about me and it was the exact same dream as I had too! Me and her aren't close at all, we normally just say hi. Can this be a sign of the future? We come from different backgrounds/religion and it's still early months yet, so we haven't told our parents or far family and we're too young for marriage. Has anyone ever experienced this and it actually happened in the future? I just find it really weird and I'm really interested in to know what this means.
I don't believe in psychic stuff and fortune telling but I don't not believe if you know what I mean. In other words, it's possible maybe this is some sort of premonition. But dreams are kind of weird. They are mostly based on you, your thoughts, your emotions, and etc. It sounds like you both subconsciously realize you're not very close and would like to change that in some way.

Q: When me and my girlfriend met we were both very slim and fit. We watched what we ate and were always at the gym. We also used to make fun of the fat people in our group of friends.

We have been living together for years now (since graduation) and the scale has risen and so have our thighs. I have got a big potbelly now, and her buttocks have gotten huge. I guess it's just overindulgence in the sweets (cakes and pies on dates, donuts with our feet up watching TV).

Bottom line, though, our friends from college (we all graduated 2 years ago and have been quite busy) invited us to wing night to reunite again (and it does sound fun). But, the last time they saw us we were wearing tight jeans, nice shoes on me, heels on her. Now, I wear sweatpants with socks and sandles, and my girlfriend wears stretch pants with slippers.

On top of that, they have all been dieting and spending time in the gym, so they all lost the weight.

So my question is: should we go to wing night, a night that involves eating messy food with your hands, when we both got fat? (even worse, we used to be the skinny couple that made fun of the fatties in the group), now I can barely button my pants, she complains that she can't see her slippers when she looks down, and we both are out of breath, grabbing our knees after we go up a few stairs.

I just dont want the people who know us as the "fitness elitists" to see us walk in slowly, breathing heavily. Not to mention, the sight of us sitting with a pile of wings, with sauce all over ourselves, eating with our hands.

I also feel bad for my girlfriend because one of our friends whose weight my girlfriend joked about a lot, will be there, and she too has lost it all. It doesn't seem fair that she should be able to watch her pig out on a sloppy meal.

So, should we go?
Actually I think you guys should go. You guys gaining weight, it's called Karma or getting a taste of your own medicine. It's the universe's payback for all those times you guys thought you had the right to not only judge people but ridicule them. You both need to think about how the way you act and think effect other people.
But you should go. If those people are your friends they won't care, they won't judge you but if your friends are anything like yourselves can't say they won't.
And that shows what kind of people YOU two are.
Pick better friends. Make better decisions. Open up your mind.

Q: Whenever I give my boyfriend a hickey it fades super quick or doesn't even leave a mark. Any tips?
I'm sorry, totally laughed. I see you like marking your territory on your boyfriend (totally get it). You might have to do it either a little harder or longer. Like say you are sucking on his neck, you might have to suck in your lips a little bit more or hold your suction in for a longer amount of time. BUT also did you ever ask your bf if he gets rid of them?

Q: I am confused on how to make myself orgasm
Every women is different really. Some can have orgasms without physical contact and some have never orgasmed. I would honestly just look it up on a search engine such as google. There are so many sexual howtos and techniques you can find that I wouldn't even know which one to send you. And you can always try them out. Don't be disappointed when one doesn't work because another might. And there also is a small percentage of people who can't make themselves orgasm, it has to be through another.

bio
Imperfectionist
Hi, thanks for coming to my column.

The name is Diamond but Dia is fine.

20, female, jersey girl at heart. mixed race taurus natured woman.

So...the reason I made this was during the start of my senior year of high school I had reached a point in my life where I didn't want to live anymore. I was tired of fighting and didn't see the reasons to fight. It was a random stranger that made me realize I would be stupid to take my life and to stop fighting.

So if you think I'm going to tell you life gets easier, I'm not. Let's face it, it doesn't get easier. Through pain you get stronger and learn to open your eyes to those things that give you strength to live.

Mine happen to be music, writing, dr. pepper, anime, the color black, the way rain sounds, and an amazing boyfriend. What gives you strength to live?

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