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I get envious when other girls menstruate
I am a 24year girl with poly cystic ovarian syndrome. I got diagnosed when i was 17years old. Commensement of my menarch was normal but after 2-3years irragularity took place. I do not get my periods more than 5-6months. Doctors do not want to operate as i am unmarried. I have severe hirsutism, obesity, drowsiness e.t.c. my problem is i feel so mascuiline. I feel like i am infertile. So whenever i hear my mother or other girls around me menstruating i get angry and envious. No matter how much feminine i try to make myself in deep inside i feel this disoriented gender. PCOS is tormenting me more psychological than physical. Please help.
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I have PCOS also. And I got the opposite symptoms. I had my period for a month and a half. To the point they put me on pills to stop it. You shouldn't be jealous of people getting their period the truth is having PCOS means having a kid is difficult whether you get a period or not. I agree it makes you feel masculine. Weight in all the wrong places. Body hair grows rapidly, and is also in wrong places. And if you got the bad skin part like I did you're embarrassed to leave the house without makeup or even your room. And also some of us get terrible cramps. So bad. I can't explain it. My question is have you tried going on birth control? I am on Celexa and it helps with my hormones. And honestly dieting and exercise DOES help PCOS alot. Honestly good luck and don't be scared to inbox me. Don't let this make you think your less of a woman, I get it. And you're not, a lot more women suffer from this then you think
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I do not understand what not being married has to do with the doctors doing or not doing surgery. This is an elective procedure one which you decide to have or not have. Yes the procedure may mean you cannot have children in the future. This should be your choice not the doctors.
That is your body your decision as to have or not have surgery. I can understand a doctor's reluctance to in effect sterilize an otherwise healthy young female. Still informed consent is all that should be needed.
I have two suggestions for you.
1. This may sound extreme but it should help a doctor consent to doing surgery if this is what you truly want. Find a Psychologist or psychiatrist who will meet with you, you will need a number of visits. who will certify to a surgeon or a GYN that you understand the ramifications of the surgery and that they believe this surgery is in your best interest. This assistance by a psychiatrist or psychologist will or should help you find a doctor willing to do the surgery if this is what you want.
This may not sound right but doctors may feel that the mental anguish is overriding common sense. This is the reason they are reluctant to do surgery no matter how much you may insist.
2> Find a Board Certified Gynecologist to examine you. This is a doctor who has spent extra time in a fellowship learning the specialty of Gynecology. A Board Certified Doctor has past all the test required to be certified in a specialty and is the best doctor to see when you have a specific problem.
I can't tell for sure that surgery is what you want. IF it is follow my suggestions and I believe you will have the outcome you are looking for. Just remember it your body and your in charge.
I believe that once you get what you may want the other problems, specifically the obesity, will rectify as your self-esteem rebuilds.
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You are more than your illness and it should not define who you are or where you are going in life. You have lost track of who you are. You were born female, are pretty and no doubt guys are attracted to you and vice-versa but the diagnosis has led you to believe you are less than female and severely lacking. Nonsense!
What you need to do is be honest with your doctor and tell them you do not feel remotely female r feminine because of the medical problem which is NOT your fault and that you feel left out when others talk about periods and that you feel masculine at those times and left out. You may need counselling to deal with how you are feeling and to see gradually that just because you haven't periods doesn't mean you're any less female or you as before.
Let them know about the anger and being envious. Know also that most of these friends who talk about their's and get you annoyed may have ZERO idea what you are going through inside or what PCOS is an affects you. Perhaps telling them in confidence that it hurts to talk about periods and something you badly want but cannot experience with any real frequency.
Most women take it for granted or may not like their's because of cramps etc so if your friends don't understand the way you feel they will when you tell them your story. Perhaps they can help you see that you're more female than you think and it's not a menstrual cycle that makes you a girl. You have to get professional help and let go of the psychological BS you are latched on.
As for these other girls as hard as it is don't blame them but rather talk to them about how them sharing brings up stuff you haven't dealt with about yours, the PCOS etc and ask them not to share in future. Don't be angry because they really don't know what you are feeling inside and aren't talking about it out of malice.
I can understand envy and wanting to be like everyone else. That's a natural thing and I know just about everyone would understand but just remember that you are still female and whole. You just have to learn that you are. I think talking to someone and getting counselling will greatly help you love yourself again.
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