about

Hi, I'm Emily. Call me Emily or Em, I prefer either. I have been a featured columnist 2 times now. After disabling my account I had about 3 years ago, a lot has happened which made me want to come back. I feel as though helping people with their problems, helps me solve mine, even if that doesn't make a lot of sense to any of you. Don't hesitate to ask me anything, I will answer fairly quickly depending on the question. If you want a hard-thought out answer, which is what I usually give, it may take a little longer- it benefits everyone in the long run.

advice

is it ok to go out with a guy after my best friend did?plz answer need help fast!! i rate high!

It is if your best friend is completely okay with it. She might say she's fine with it, but deep down she might not be. Talk to her about it first before you go out with this boy. You wouldn't want to loose a lifetime friend to a boy who you wont marry anyways.

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freidns always like call me dumb blonde or blondie. even my friends little brother is. he also slaps my butt and says hey blondie. why!?!?

Because your blonde. It's not a bad thing. Blondes have a stereotype of being dumb, its not you.

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So lately my friend has become really close with a girl from her work. She hasn't blown me off for her, but she's postponed our plans a few hours later several times lately. And while doing this, she was arranging plans with the other girl, although she's not aware that I know this.
Today, we were hanging out and she informed that she needed to be home early because she had college work to do. So an hour after I find out that she's at her house. I can't help by being slightly offended by this and I'm wondering if I should confront her?

Same thing happened to me a few years back. You need to talk to her and tell her that it's bothering you. You have every right to be annoyed with her, she's postponing plans you had before her and this other girl had. It's not right. Talk with her about it, and tell her your offended and if she keeps doing it, you don't want to hangout with her anymore. That's what I did, and the girl finally stopped. Suggest maybe all 3 of you hanging out together.

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14/F

It's more like 2 questions...confused!!

ok so I've liked my friend for about 5 years now but I found out he doesn't like me. He only thinks of me as a friend. I want to know if I should keep on liking him or just forget about him and stay friends with him??

Also his cuzin likes me too but I just think of him as a friend but ever since I found out he likes me, I've been thinking about him...What do I do??

They are both 15.

5 years is a long time. And the longer it is, the harder and more pain you feel.


I think that if he finally told you he just wanted to be friends, then just stick with that. If he isn't gonna treat you right, leave him.


I think you should go for his cousin. You seem to be really interested, so I say go for it!

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Hi I'm a 17 yr old guy a senior in high school, I wanna ask this girl to home coming could you give me some clever ideas as how to ask her? As well on date and dinner ideas all that stuff you do at homecoming all within a $250 dollar budget thank you so much!

Good for you! I'm sure she will be thrilled to even just get asked by you.


You could stick a note in her locker asking her. Just make sure its the right locker, that could turn out to be a big mess. You could leave her clues to find you somewhere romantic (park or something) and have flowers ready for her, and a little note saying 'the last clue, you have to answer yourself: will you go to homecoming with me?' or something cute like that. She will love it. I know I would!


As far as dinner, don't be too expensive, cause then it gets to be over $250. Do a movie, and then dinner. Ask her what her favorite restaurant and her favorite place to hangout, and then do that. She will be really appreciative of you thinking of her and what SHE wants to do. Thats a real gentleman move right there.


Hope I helped, and Good Luck! Make sure to tell me how Homecoming goes! Drop me an inbox!

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my friend is becoming painful.
she so immiture, im moving on, i dont want to do the same kidish stuff we used to do.
i sick of her wanting to do something EVERYWEEKEND

Just because she might be a little less mature than you, doesn't mean you have to cut her out of your life forever.


People mature at different speeds, she might mature a little slower than you. Talk to her about this and how you feel about the wa shes acting, she'll never know. Branch off and hang out with other friends. Suggest to your friend that you want to do more exciting/not childish things.

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13/f
i have this one guy in four of my classes and hes so sweet and funny but i think he likes me and i just wanna be friends cuz i like this other guy...so i dont want to send him the wrong message but how do i let him know i wanna be just friends?

Sticky situation I see...

Boys don't adjust well to the 'friend' concept. You may be flirting with him and not even know it. Just let him know you are friends. Hint around. "I am so happy we are friends, any friends of yours that you could hook me up with?!" Along the same lines as the person below me said, not taking the credit for that one. Try not to make physical contact and try to work with different people other than him if given the option to work with someone in the classes you have him in. Good Luck!

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Okay I have decided That i want a STEADY advice buddy which means that i want to have one specific person (that actually LOVE giving advice) That i can write to wheneva i need advice. Im senseing that some of the advicee that is giving to me is not serious. I wont someone that will actually think the advice that they are about to give to me and not go off their own disappointments. Example: If I ask someone what should i do about my boyfriend I dont want the response to be...(FORGET HIM!!! HE'S NOT WORTH IT) Just because that person have had some problems in their relationship. I wont a person that I can send direct msgs to. I also want someone that wont take FOREVER to respond bacc because I really do need help on some situations. So please, if you feel as if you can be a great advice buddy then please respond. Thanks

Knowing from experience, I used to talk to a advicenator themself and ask them questions whenever I needed it, and it was a really good feeling having someone by your side helping through you through problems when and where you needed it. If you would like to test it out, I would love to help you. I love giving advice, and I give advice outside advicenators too. I have been through a lot, as a teenager, and I know what it feels like. You can inbox me on here, or email is fine too. ejfeil@comcast.net

Good Luck!

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I'm feeling a little bit pissed off at two of my friends (they're not like my best friends or anything, more like really good acquaintances). I had my b-day party yesterday and they thought it would be funny to "pie me" in the face...but they didnt just do a little whipped cream or whatever the two of them got me with **two** real pies. It was a total surprise and I didnt know what to think at the time but it was funny, although more than anything just a total shock. But I was totally covered in the stuff and now the shirt I was wearing is stained and it wont come out, that was like $30 and my jeans have stains on them too that won't come out and they were really expensive too. Besides I sat at my party, where i really wanted to look good, covered in bits of pie for like 2 more hours, I mean I cleaned up but it was way too messy to clean up totally... so I looked like crap of course!

So anyway should I be pissed off or just take it for what is was supposed to be, a joke/surprise? I mean I know they weren't trying to be mean, they just wanted to be funny. Like i said it was kinda funny even for me but now that its over it kind of sucks that I am left with stained clothes plus I looked like crap for most of my party.

Thanks - Kate

I think they wanted you to feel happy that they surprised you like that. I don't think they meant to stain your clothes or to be mean about it. It was your party and they probably wanted you to have fun! Who cares if you looked like 'crap', it was your party, and I am sure no one noticed :)

As for the stains, get some really good detergent, and some tide-to-go and use that before putting it in the wash. If the shirt you had on was white, you could use a bleach pen on it and then throw it in the wash. Or, take it to a dry cleaner and they will know exactly how to get it out.

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i had 4 guy bff. but three of them hate me for no reason. and so one of my friends is realy cool hes still my bff. but anyway i love him like a brother we have laughs together like sayin he looks like justin bieber did when he was younger. and when hes hurt i help him. but we fight but then i want him to be my bff again because boys are usually better friend then girls. right. because they dont gossip. so is it true boys are better friends than girls and were we ment to be friends

Everyone has a different prefrence on that subject.

I love my girls because we share the same interests, such as shopping and buying makeup and new clothes, and talk about boys, and u can share those passions with girl friends.

But, your right, boys dont't carry drama along with them, they are carefree and don't gossip, but you cant have quality talks with them like you could with your girls. Each gender has a pro and con, you shouldn't base your friends upon gender. Boys and Girls are great in their own way.

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I think I love my best friend his name is alex he has a girlfriend they have been together for two years but I can't help it I don't know what to do

this may not be what you want to hear, especially from a complete stranger, but someone has to do it.

if you guys are bestfriends, theres probably a good reason for it. you guys wouldnt work out as a couple because you guys are just too close and just know too much about one another. everybody has that relationship, its not just you, so dont ever think that.

yet, sometimes there are those rare exceptions. sometimes, bestfriends are the perfect solemates for people. they can act themselves around them, and they know everything about them, they're easy to please, and they've known each other for quite some time, so the relationship is just easier then starting out from "scratch" with someone you dont have a closer bond with.

wait to talk it out, maybe when him and his girlfriend arent so serious.

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I wanted to start a softball team. So I started asking a few friends and an Acquaintance (call him Mr. A). Mr. A asked a few of his friends (who are not friends of mine) to join the team. Mr. A now has enough people to field the whole team. In the meantime, I've changed my mind about playing softball. Mr. A keeps bugging me about starting the team. Should I tell him that I just changed my mind? BTW -- Mr. A's wife is very friendly with my wife.

i think you should keep what you originally planned. its short notice, and he's took the time and effort to gather up a team for you. you may end up liking it, and youll be happy you went through with it.

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17/f.

to make this very short, my best friend is really jealous of me & gets jealous of anything i say & do, she makes up lies and always tries to one up me. its getting on my nerves so much. its getting worse & worse. i tried to confront her about it, and she gets better for a few weeks, and then its back to her old ways. i just don't know what to do.

i dont blame you for getting annoyed. it seems like when you confront her, she wants to change, but once you've taken her back, she just does the same thing to you over and over again, which isnt what a real 'best friend' does. i would try doing the same thing she does to you, to her, just maybe less extreme, and see how she likes it. sit down and have a serious conference with her. a quick talk and "makeup" session wont work. you need to tell her exactly whats bothering you and what you want her to do to change.

hope i helped! xoxo

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Ok so I live with my best friend, and for the most part she is a decent and good friend, but this girl is sooooo insanely attached to her boy friend. Let me start out by describing their relationship. They have been together for over 2 years and neither of them have ever been with anyone else. She drops everything for him all the time. She'll make plans with me and then not show up because he called and she 'forgot' our plans. She cry's if she cant see him for a day, she is constantly txting him, calls him for an hour every night. I live with her and we share a bed room and he is here almost everyday. I just feel like she puts him before her own life, and she's constantly upsetting our friendship because of him and I am at my wits end. I dont want to tell her 'Hey, your adicted to your boyfriend and I cannot stand that you put him before me all the time!' because this would end in an emotional spout. So please someone give me advice as to what to before I smother her in her sleep lol jk.

being a girl, i know how attached a girl can get to her boyfriend. its happened to the best of us. and you cant really understand it unless youve been through it. but, heres what ill tell ya.

you need to tell her straight up that its bothering you. dont wait too long or it may get to you too much and youll end up in a fight with her, which wont be too good since you guys live together. dont get a friend to do it either, she'll be even more mad that you did that. dont hide from the problem, you need to tell her yourself, and very soon.

tell her politely that its bothering you. something like "i really miss us hanging out like we used to, can we hangout just the 2 of us?" or "remember that time when (name a time when you guys had a lot of fun together), we need to do it again soon!" she'll realize she really misses you. or maybe you can even offer hanging out with her and her boyfriend. it will make both ends meet without making either of you upset.

ive been through this before and everything will work out for the best, i promise. just give it time and she'll eventually realize that she's treating her bestfriend badly.

hope i helped! xoxo

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