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June 17, 2009

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You can ask me about ANYTHING, and I mean it. If I don't have an answer to give you, instead of making something up, I WILL find you somewhere to go where you will be able to find out what you need. My inbox is always open, and you are quite welcome to IM me on AIM. I think thats about all you need to know, but if you've got other questions...well...see above. =)

advice

i cut myself...and i was doing it really bad but now not as bad..i dont know what to do or how to fix it, i have scares all over and i want help but i dont how to get it.....and i really need some help!!!

Self-injury is something very difficult to deal with, I would know. My advice to you is to find a therapist that is well versed in adolescents and self-injury. The help a therapist provides is invaluble, and incredibly hard to find for oneself. If this isn't necessarily an option for you right now, I suggest picking up a book called "Bodily Harm: The Breakthrough Healing Program for Self-Injurers." It's written by the founders of S.A.F.E Alternatives, and it provides a lot of good insightful information as well as several tools to help one on their path to ceasing the cycle of self-injury.

The most important thing I learned from that book is to give yourself some TIME between the thoughts and feelings you have that make you want to self injure, and the actual act of self injuring. This time is invaluble and can often curb the impulse. One effective means to providing this space is to fill out an Impulse Control Log for yourself, which would include the time, date, place, situation, what self-injury would accomplish, what feelings you are having that make you want to self-injure, and the outcome of doing the impulse control log. Also build yourself a set of alternatives that seek to answer the need that self-injury fills for you.

Talk to a school guidance counselor or your parents about finding you reputable help, because it is extremely difficult to stop by yourself. There is also a hotline you can call that is good in times of crisis, times where you are feeling reflective and empowered to get help for yourself,and is an alternative that again provides the space between the emotions you feel and the action you take. The hotline is 1-800-DONT-CUT.

Good luck, and please do seek help.

Okay well i'm 14 years/female old and my chest has just recently started hurting.. Heart problems doesnt run in my family so I know it's not that.. the pain is on and off. and for the past week ive been avoiding unhealthy foods, and eaating only the healthy foods becuase im scared of something happening.. I haven't hit my growth spurt yet, like I havent gotten boobs or anything yet could that be why my chest is hurting? or could it because anxiety? I have been really stressed out lately. My mom is taking me to the doctor thursday, but i'd like some advice on what it could be so I can quit stressing out about it until my doctor day.. I'd appreciate your help :)

Chest pains can be a myriad of things, none of which anyone but a doctor would be able to tell you what they might be caused from. You haven't described your chest pains very well (Central? To the sides? Off to one side? Achey? Sharp? Tight?) so it's even harder to suggest a potential cause. My suggestion would be just to relax as much as you can, regardless of whether or not your chest pains are stress related, it's always a good thing to de-stress. Find comfort in the fact that the doctor is only a couple days away and he or she will be able to put your mind at ease very soon, and in the meantime there isn't much you can do. Find activities to keep your mind off it until Thursday. :) Good luck.

Im a relatively thin person, but i have an annoying patch of armpit fat which isnt part of my boobs, but isnt part of my arms. what can i do to get rid of it? because it really affects what shirts i wear :/

This is very common in women, and nothing you can do about it except learn to accept it. Look at even models and movie stars (Look at Tyra Banks!), a lot of them have that as well. Trust me when I say that nobody is looking at you going "Ew look at that," because most of them have it too. Don't worry!

I'm just wondering if any of you have tried Vitamin Water and if it tastes really good? And if it's good for you or can harm you. Any info. you have on it will help. Thanks :)

The stuff is amazing. And great for you. My favorite flavor is either Dragonfruit or Kiwi-Strawberry. (Deep red and Pink.)

i have i red dot on my nose ive has for a few years. The doctor said its some type of mole i guess. My parents want me to get laser sergery. The dot is only less than 1/4 inch. Does laser surgery hurt more than a shot? They say they'll put numbing cream on it, but that never helps completely.

My friend has one of those! We named it Freddy. /tangent.

Laser surgery will feel like a harsh sunburn the day after. But other than that, its not too much of a pain.

14/f
i've never really been like, close with my mom. like we're not really friends. but umm i just got my period and ummmmm i know i have to like tell her sometime! but i don't know how because it would be soo embaressing. should i just tell her or like...? idk!

Every girl has a period, so its really not as big of a deal that you're making it out to be. Just tell her "Oh yeah, Mom, I started my period the other day" No big deal. She probably won't have anything to say about it except for "Okay" or "Congratulations!"

I bloat a lot to where my stomach sticks out so far! It is embarassing. What are some ways to prevent bloating? Thank you.

Cut down on your sodium intake, and it will help with the bloating. Also, Green Tea pills will help with bloating and taking off water weight.

whats the best way to get rid of acne? more than just wash it everday..... any ideas or websites.x0x0 thanks

I suggest Maximum Strength Oxy pads, followed up with Clean n Clear moisturizer. Clean, but not dry.

And..do this TWICE a day at most. Overwashing will cause peeling/more acne.

Okay, well, I got my period back when I was 9 years old, and since then it was wicked heavy. Then a year ago, I stopped getting it. Yesterday was the first time in a year I did get it. I'm 15 years old, and 220-ish pounds. Is this a really big problem?

Well, your period doesn't just stop by itself. There is usually an underlying cause to that, and that cause may be the big problem.

Were you under a lot of stress or clinically depressed?

Did you lose or gain a substantial amount of weight in a relatively short amount of time?

Was there an event that caused anything serious, whether emotionally or physically?

If any of those questions come into play, you should see a doctor. Other than that, if your period remains being normal from now on, you should be okay. If it wavers again, I suggest seeing an doctor to see what might be going on with your cycle.

okay so im a girl. 16 years old. and ive had my period for quite a few years. but i was just wondering if..
1) my breasts have stopped growing already and 2) lately i have had the constant urge to pee and even after i go i feel like i have to again...i was just wondering what it meant or what i can do about it.
3)if it is normal for a girl to day dream about having sex with her crush?

Thanks for all your help!

Your breasts could be done growing, or maybe they're not. Usually, it doesn't stop until you're arount twenty, but the growing majorly slows after your first period.

Number two sounds a lot like the symptoms of a bladder infection - if its painful when you pee, see a doctor right away. It could also be an overactive bladder, or a variety of other problems. I would definently try to call your doctor as soon as possible, to see whats going wrong.

Its very normal to have sex dreams about your crush, almost every girl has this at one time or another. Its no big problem, but you should try to keep that to yourself because its frowned upon, even though its normal.

Hey, i am currently on medication to help make my pimples go away..it's not working all that great right now though..are there any ways i can make my pimples go away faster in addition to my medication?

If its in addition to medication, I suggest calling your dermatologist, because some topical acne medications can interfere with the medication. I personally use Clearasil lotion stuff and Stridex pads to wash my face before I apply the clearisil. My best answer to you is for you to call your dermatoligist and ask what would be the best course of action.

Lately, it seems that no matter what I eat or drink, after a few minutes of doing so, I start feeling extremely nauseous and sometimes I even throw up. It's not voluntary; I don't do it on purpose so I'm not like bulimic or anything. Does anyone have any ideas on why this might be happening?

It was happening around May a few months ago too and I went to the doctor. They ran tests and everything but could find anything wronge medically.

Please keep in mind that no one here is qualified to give you medical diagnosis, doctor or not, online.

But I had the same thing going on about a year or two ago. I was reffered to a gastrointestinal specialist, and they decided to do an endoscopy procedure on me. That is when they put you under anesthesia, and run a small tube (About the width of a drinking straw) down your throat. The tube has a camera on the end, and sometimes various other attachments to collect samples of your esophagus/stomach lining. This makes it so they can see inside your stomach and see whats going on.

It turned out that I had Acid Reflux Disease, but instead of getting heartburn like most others, the acid would stay in my stomach, making the lining of my stomach inflamed and sensitive. Becasuse of that, my stomach was "smaller" and anything that touched the lining of my stomach made me feel sick. I was put on perscription Prilosec, and it got better.

You should ask to see a gastrointestinal specialist, chances are they will decide to do endoscopy to see whats going on. If for some reason you cannot make this appointment because of insurance issues or anything, ask your parents to buy you some Prilosec OTC (Over the counter) to try and see if that makes it any better.

is it okay to put my sea sick patch on my butt or boob? i know it sounds weird.. but i don't want the patch to interfere with my tan. i don't even know if i'll need it yet, if i get sea sick. but is this okay? thanks.

Ginger pills work a million times better than seasick patches. I suggest you buy some ginger pills, and take those if you need them. That won't interfere with your tan at all!

I am just 13 and I have this urge to smoke. I have never smoked before and I know it is bad for you. I have never did any kind of drugss including weed or coke. My mom would kill me if I did smoke. So I ask my sister how old she was when she started smoking and she said about 13 or 14. And that made it even worse for me! Even people at school smoke! What can I do? I have even thought of stealing them from my mom! I'm a good kid! HELP!

Smoking = Totally Gross.

It smells. It turns your teeth yellow. It turns your fingers yellow. It'll make it hard to breathe. Your lungs will get gross. It increases your risk of cancer. Its expensive. It might get to the point where it is a burden to your daily life. Its illegal. Your parents or POLICE could find out. You look like a flipping moron doing it.

Remember these reasons. That should make it so you don't want to smoke. If you still want to smoke, go ahead, ruin your life, babe.

okay. i really need my braces off. like i got them in 6th grade. and im now a freshman! i dont wear my elastics, and if i wear them they'll come off. and to those that have already had elastics and braces, approx. how long will it take for my teeth to not have an over bite anymore? i really need my braces off!!!!

You NEED to wear the elastics. Even if they come off, put them back on. If its a real problem, ask your orthodontist what else you can do. Until then, just wear them. Your orthodontist may decide that nightgear is right for you. (Thats what I had, its like...headgear, but you only wear it at night so it doesn't suck TOO terribly bad)

is it bad to put a warm/hot wash cloth over your eyes for like more than 5 minutes? idk why it would be but im just wondering.

If you press too hard, it may make your vision momentarily blurry, but otherwise no. I have been told by a doctor to put hot compresses on my eyes for different problems - so yeah. No problems.

OK im 13/f i got my period for the 1st time on sunday and i do not have a mother or any brothers or sisters to talk to ..... just my dad.... i dont wanna tlk to him about this .. i have some supplies that i got from the talk but they are runnimg out very quickly... how can i bring this subject up with my dad without making him freak out...... thanks a million ill rate u a 5 no matter what!!!!

I don't know why this is such a big deal for people..but anyways..

Its totally normal, and it was bound to happen sometime. Both you and your dad know that. Actually, dads aren't as clueless as you might think about periods. They've delt with girls all through high school and also at one point had a girlfriend or wife that I'm SURE its come up. No big deal, every girl gets it. Just go up to him and say "Hey dad, I didn't tell you but I started my period on Sunday and I need some supplies, can we go get some? I'm running out." No big deal. Good luck.

I got my belly button done and my body rejected it now its really hard is it supposed to be really hard? whats going to happen to it?

The "hard" part you're feeling is scar tissue. It will probably remain there for a length of time. You also will probably have a scar on the skin where it was peirced, maybe for just a while, maybe forever. It all depends, but its no big deal. Depending on the amount of scar tissue you develop and when it goes away, you may be able to re-peirce your belly. If you're interested in re-peircing, go to your nearest (but trustworthy) peircer for a counsultation. Good luck!

Can anyone recommend a good type of shampoo and conditioner? Like the company, and which kind to get?

I personally like Matrix Biolage for colored hair. You can only get it at professional salons, but its worth it, it smells good and makes your hair look good.

i have 4 brothers (1,4,7,13) and 13 yaer old is my twin and we have a really close relationship... but i have no privacy watsoever
:( when i started my period of coarse they all found out and my twin accaully was really nice to me and we accaully talked about it:) one day i got really mad at him and he went to school and told all his guy friends that i started( i kno... its gay he told every1) so my whole grade (8th) found out about it and i was the first 1 to start in my grade of my friends ( i kno its weird) and they were all like'oh my god' but all guys were being mean and makin fun of me( i have no clue why)can i get some advice how to deal with this and what to say to those guys???

I rate 5's all the time if u help

thanks

Tell them its completely natural, and they're being immature if they're making a big deal about it. Because its the truth right there. If you're in 8th grade thats about normal time for the majority of girls to start menstrating so I wouldn't be surprised if you're NOT the only one in your grade to have started. Tell them facts, but don't be obnoxious right back, thats only sinking down to their level. Good luck.

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