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March 8, 2005Answers:
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Cheers! I enjoy giving advice and I think I'm good at it. Is it pretentious to say I refuse to answer questions about "Love" from people who are under age 16? I don't think love is real when you're 14, and I don't think you can fall in love in a month. I won't dignify that kind of stupidity with an answer. I also won't answer questions with terrible grammar. I just make fun of them on myspace! I know that's not nice, but it's just SO easy. And it's so unfair for me to give them a good, honest answer when they haven't asked a good, proper question. Ask me a real question and I will give you a real answer!
advice
Does age really matter when your falling in love? I'm fourteen and I would like to think anything is possible. I've been dating this guy for a short period of time but it has felt different than anything other than before. On this chain letter thing, and I know this sounds so stupid, but I made a wish to fall in love with him. My friends hate the fact that this guy and I are together, but for the first time I couldn't care less what my friends think. What do you think, is it possible?
While it's possible, I wouldn't count on it. At such a young age, one has not really come to experience the world and all it has to offer; even if you were two years older, I would still have my doubts. There are so many things that you learn and discover as you're growing older, so I see no need to rush such a large decision.
Just be careful with yourself.
THIS IS PRETTY LONG AND BORING....
Im 20m and never had a girlfriend!!!I never even hold or kiss a girl before.... It's not that im ugly or gay, although im not the cute or handsome type either. When i was in high school there were a few girls that come up to me but they weren't my type so i refused them all. But the girl that was my type, i never had the courage to ask them out (im very shy around the girl i like). Now that i drop out of college and work fulltime, i dont have the chance of meeting new people. HOW AM I GOING TO GET A GF? I dont hang out that much and i had never step foot in a club before. Here's the weird thing, the older i get the pickier i am about girlfriend. I thought that not having a gf is suppose to make me desperate, but im not, although i do want a gf pretty bad. What make it worse is that i dont like party girls or girls that would go out with someone that just met and thought he is kinda cute, of course there is nothing wrong with that, im just being picky. I would like to get to know the girl a lil bit before i go out with her, but HOW AM I GOING TO DO THAT????
There's nothing wrong with having standards, first of all. All those other guys are kinda scummy for taking any thing they can get, you know? Just be glad that you haven't been with someone you don't actually like--it'll save you time and effort. Even if you're still a virgin and such, I still don't see it as a big issue. Your sexual status is completely your business, and if anyone ever asks why it took you "so long" to lose your virginity, just say you were waiting for the right girl. (Then, bat your eyelashes provacatively. Just kidding.)
Secondly, if you want a girl, keep your eyes peeled! You can meet a girl almost anywhere! Work, through friends, the gym... almost anywhere you go. You could probably go to Disneyland and pick up phone numbers, for goodness sake.
Be sure to not judge someone by their looks alone, but by who they are. Surely you can find a girl who you like both inside and out? And I understand when you say you want to be with someone who will actually get to know you a bit before you're with them--this is a pretty intelligent way of going about things, actually. However, there's nothing wrong with going out on a date with a girl you've met, is there? What rule says you have to automatically be a boyfriend to someone's girlfriend? You're young--date!
As for being shy, sometimes, you just gotta push yourself out of your comfort zone. Seven times out of ten, if you like a girl and she likes you, she will NOT ask you out. I don't know why, but it's true. Most girls are just not that comfortable with putting themselves on a limb. But back to my main point: if you like a girl, ask her out! Even if she turns you down, it'll be good practice for you; how else do you think you'll get ahead in life? Are you supposed to wait till stuff just gets handed to you, or are you supposed to go out and get it for yourself?
So, I wish you luck.
Ok so I have a guy friend, and he's one of my best friends. We have a really good friendship, he's like a brother really. And I love him, and I'm pretty sure he knows it. But he's really hot n heavy with this girl, who I can't stand. She's one of those girls who are really pretty, and knows they are really pretty. I'm not sure what I'm trying to do really, it's just a problem, and it hurts. He'd never do anything to intentionally hurt me, I know that. I'm open to any advice! Thanks!
Are you jealous? Do you want to be like her, or do you want to be with him? Or, do you just not like the girl? Is she bitchy?
There has to be a legitimate reason for not wanting them to be together, and the most important thing is figuring out why you don't want them together. once you determine your answer, talk to your friend. Don't forget to tell him that you love him, and that you only want what's best.
Good luck.
hey well here is the problem.. sorry might be long! ok well the guy i am goin out with i like him alot! and i mean i kno i love him.. i hve never felt this way about ne guy ever!.. we hve been goin out for a while now. but the problem is like at school or somewhere wher there are 'certain' people or something i jus act diff around him..and at school he says i act like i dont like him but when we are alone everything is perfect.. i mean i kno im not embarrassed of him! he is not the kind of guy u would be embarrassed of! i love him soo much but we hve been gettin into alot of fights about this and i dont kno what to do i tell him all the time i wil try to act different but i never do.. i dont want to loose him over something like this!! if you hve any help at all please answer or leave ur sn and i will IM you! thanks soo much!!
Maybe you're just not comfortable with the idea of Public Displays of Affection. Tell him that you do appreciate him and that you're not embarrassed whatsoever, but you aren't sure about some of that good old fashioned PDA.
If this is a huge issue, then start slow. Hold his hand a little in front of your friends. Touch him enough to let him know you're interested, but don't go overboard. You don't need to crawl on his back or anything, but it's the little things that count.
This is for all you lovely ladies out there.
- What types of things do you like to hear.
Example. "You're beautiful"
What other things do you like being told.
Thanks!
I think if you're trying to figure out what a lady likes, you should probably get to know the lady individually, instead of trying to mass compliment them.
well lately my friend has totally been flirting with my boyfriend.She knows she does it but she just shrugs it off.I hate it!!like we will be walking in the halls together and she will come right between us and rather close to him i might add.i dont wanna ruin our friendship, but me and this guy really love each other.we've been together through thick and thin.Please help me and i hope this wasn't to long.
Talk to your friend once more and if she doesn't listen, then there's probably not much you can do on that end. If this is the case, then talk to your boyfriend. Ask him to make it clear that he's not interested in your friend and to move away from her everytime she approaches him. He should make it perfectly clear that he's yours, and that he wants to keep it that way.
Hi,
I like this guy that one of my friends are going out with and she really likes him. I don't know what to do .should I be selfless and let her be happy or should I put my self first and take a chance on braking them up and losing a friend?
Think about it this way: which relationship do you think will last longer? Are you willing to break up a friendship for a guy who may not even be into you, and even if he were, probably wouldn't even stick around that long?
Let's say that he does break up with your friend for you. What guarantee do you have that he won't turn around and do the same thing to you? Where will you be then? Without a boyfriend, and branded as a boyfriend thief.
And remember, he may tell you everything you want to hear, but it's just as likely he told your friend the same thing.
You might like this guy a lot, but chances are, if you're going to ask a question like this, you're not that old--which means you have plenty of time to look for someone else. So don't worry about this particular guy and try looking for someone else. It'll be worth it in the long run.
A year or two ago i went out w/ this girl. i liked her, she liked me. i dumped her ,because i relized that she wasn't that actractive, and she hated me. she wouldn't talk to me look at me etc. now i see her in the halls and at dismissle. now she really actractive. i don't want to go out w/ her or anything, i just want to be her friend again.what should i do?
p.s. she has a boy-friend now
I don't think you should talk to her. You strike me as shallow and superficial, and if you really cared about her, you would leave her alone. She deserves better than that. You had your chance, but you dumped her because you thought she was ugly, and now she's not, you want to be her friend. That is Fucked up. Leave her the hell alone. Maybe when you mature a little, you could try not to be as dumb with another girl.
i have been broken up with my boyfriend since september and we have both pretty much moved on .. i feel like im not ready to start another serious relationship.. i have always liked this kid matt & he is perfect for me but i dont think he knows how i feel .. but there is this kid dave that has always liked me and he treats me like a goddess but for some reason i cant ever like him enough to go out with him... what should i do? be single and go with the flow.. or try to committ to dave?
Don't go out with someone just because they make you feel better. That's cruel to them because you are not as committed as they are. If you don't like him enough to go out with him, then don't. It's not fair to lead him along.
Cheers.
f/19
My bf and I have been dating for about a month now and he recently told me that he thinks hes in love with me. I'm kind of turned off by that because its so soon. He keeps asking me how I feel and I told him I'm not sure, I'm not in love with him, what should I do.
Honesty is the best policy! Tell him that you're not ready to make that kind of decision, but you know that if given (much) more time, you can love him. Love is a process and it takes time, effort, and work, but if you're both willing to take things step by step, then who knows what good things can happen? And kudos to you for not being stupid and deciding you love him after only a month! That's wisdom!
Cheers!
Hey everyone, I was just wondering, I've never really just 'hooked-up' with a guy, meaning the only relationships I've been in, they had something serious part of it. I've never done friends with benefits. I was wondering what are your views on fwb and 'hook-ing/up' like what are the outcomes? benefits? feelings for one another? thanks in advance, i rate well. :--)
Okay! I like your question. :)
I have never really hooked up with anyone until just recently. A friend and I were friend with benefits for about two months, and it was fine. We work together and at first I was afraid it would get weird, but as long as everyone involved acts like responsible adults, then it's a fun thing.
Now, I say we 'were' fwb b/c we are now bf and gf. So, I guess the outcome is a relationship, which is okay. I would be good either way, right now.
I also have another friend who had fwb, and they too ended up going out. It's been a year and some change since that started, so... I guess one thing really does lead to another.
Cheers!
I started dating this guy when I was fifteen who was eighteen. He and I were together for a year and two months....partially because I ran away with him for five of them. Well, this last December I had his child and my mom and I won't let him have any part of it. But since he was eighteen, I just want to make sure that in two years when I'm eighteen he can't try to fight for custody. Would he have any rights over my son?
Depending on where you are, you could probably have him arrested on statutory rape and possibly kidnapping. If he's an adult and you are not, and you both disappear, he's legally accountable for your whereabouts.
Now, what happened between the two of you? Is he abusive? Is there a particular reason why you don't want him to see his child? You may be able to retain custody, but he will have visitation rights. However, if he wants visits, demand child support.
ok i have this friend and well he rlly wants to loose his virginity cause he feels weird at his age...(peer presure) and so he asked me if i would do it with him...im scared of wht ppl wouldthink (ive alraeady lost mine)...but i dnt wanna sound like a slut or anything
pleasee help me!! thnks!!
First, your friend should not be asking you anything like this if he has any respect for you as a person. You are not in ANY way, Shape, or form obligated to sleep with him.
Second, if your friend is really mature enough to lose his virginity, then he should be mature enough to withstand peer pressure. And unless he's like 40+ and not in the priesthood, then I don't really think a young man's virginity is an issue.
ok well me and my boyfriend who loved eachother broke up and ive kinda moved on.im still single and he has another girlfriend.yeah it hurts considering shes a bff and she went behind my back.well i like this one guy named bradley and another named jeremy.bradley kinda is a player but hes not sweet to anyone else like he is to me.jeremy has a girlfriend but hes planning to break up with her i think and today at school i relized i liked him.he came up behind me in the hall to hug me.the problem is that i dont think i like bradley,i like jeremy more.i dont know what to do and also my boyfriend was huggin all up on me today because my friend wasnt here.what should i do?
X3 signed X3
Heart Challenged
Ignore your ex-boyfriend. He's not yours, off limits. Even if your friend went behind your back, don't do it back to her. That will only cause further problems.
As for Brad and Jeremy, you have to decide who you really want. Weight the pros and cons. If Bradley is a player, be wary of getting burned; Jeremy sounds nice, but question his motives: why is he breaking up with his girlfriend? Is it for you? Sounds nice on top, but just remember that if he doesn't have a problem doing it to his girl now, is he going to have a problem doing it to you later?
20/f/CA.
My good friend Rose just started dating my ex-boyfriend Justin. We had been broken up for quite a while, but I am still confused about how I fell about Justin, although I think I am mostly over him. I am also seeing other people. But why is it when I see them together when I go out, that I get jealous, or more upset?
If it were another woman dating Him, would your reaction be the same?
If NOT, then maybe you're jealous because you see Rosie and Justin being happy together, whereas your relationship with Justin fell apart. This is not your fault, but it's just one of those things that happens.
IF so, then you have more feelings for him than you're willing to admit. And if that is the case, then maybe you should talk to your friend Rosie about all these unresolved issues.
see i dont know what to do i like this guy alot but he wants me to tell him why i like him what should i do?
Tell him why you like him. Is he nice? Is he smart? Cute, funny? What makes you attracted to him?
Okie dokie, recently I started working....on the job, I've discovered that I am crushing on my manager and all my co-workers can tell that I like him..... he's a dancer and all this stuff so a lot of people think he is gay, but I don't think he is.... when we are around he eachother, we make the best of eachothers time... and on the first day of work I got real sick and he was very concerned. Then the next day, he asked me if I was feeling better, so he is really caring. But he laughs at everything I say and it seems like he flirts with me back...so I dunno if he likes me or not..... and we have SOOOO MUCH IN COMMON! But I think that he won't date me (or I think I wouldn't have a chance) because of the fratnerization issue (dating anyone higher personal than you which will cause you to get fired or moved to another department.). So what should I do? Like me and him could keep a down-low relationship or somthing, but is he even interested?
Whether he's interested or not, you should probably avoid the issue entirely. If there's a no-fraternization rule at your office place, both of you could be in serious trouble if your relationship went anywhere.
Also, think about the future: what happens if you break up? How awkward would it be to work with him? And if anyone else found out, you can be sure that anytime you advance, they won't think it's because you're good at crunching numbers.
Cheers.
ok I finally met this kid who ive been talking to on the internet.. and im so confused with the way I feel about him. Its like I couldnt decide whether I liked him or not. Im basically preppy girl, and hes a punk rock (dude) kind of guy. Hes so different than the guys I hang around, and I cant decide if its good or bad. I know him and my guy friends wouldnt get along, and I dont know what to do or how to feel. I'm so confused. Any help?.. I rate :-)
You have to decide whether your attraction to him is stronger than your desire to stay in your comfort zone. Something new to the mix is always interesting, and if you do decide to date, there's no rule that says your friends automatically have to become his friends. As long as he's good to you and isn't a negative influence on you, then there doesn't have to be a problem.
If your friends really don't like him for any other reason than the fact that he's a punk rocker, then you need to talk to your friends. Remind them that if they really cared, they would keep an open mind about the guy and not judge a book by it's cover.
Cheers!
I am so lonely. I can't get a boyfriend. I have been so broken lately. I don't know what to do to make a guy want to be with me. I have guy friends and i mean i am a unique person but i can't get a guy. i am not skinny but i am not too heavy. i am 15 and i probably weigh about 190 lbs. what do i do to make myself more attractive for guys to look at? are there any certain measures i should take such as loosing weight or changing my personality? please help...luv forever--->kelsey lou
Whatever you do, don't change your personality for someone else. That part of you is more unique than your fingerprints because it's something that develops with you as time goes by.
If you decide to change your physical appearance, make sure it's for you, not for someone else (or to just get someone else). Fifteen is a dangerous age to be, as you're on the edge of adulthood and adolescence, so it's important for you to learn your self worth now, not later. Don't worry so much about pleasing others with how you look or how much you weigh. If you want to become thinner, than do so for yourself.
And while fifteen is the year you really start learning what adulthood is about, you're still youthful. You have plenty of time to find a boyfriend, but remember: confidence is the best accessory a girl can have!
Cheers.
Well theres this guy ive been talking to for like 6 or 7 months now i met him through my friend. Well hes pretty cool and all. But hes always telling my friends that he likes me and all this stuff but we've never met in person all we do is talk on the phone and hes going to ask me out pretty soon and i dont know if i really should because it would cause problems with this girl and i havent even met him and probably never will since im always so busy i mean we've both been at the same parties but never noticed it or anything. So my question is when he askes me out how should i tell him no with a good reason without hurting his feelings?!? Thanks a bunch xoxo (sorry its long ill rate a 5 if you give a reasonable answer)
Tell him you're not ready for that kind of step right now--at least, that's what it sounds like from your post.