I'm a very simple person i love to write poetry and stories i'm obsessed with anime, i'm very good with chilfren and love giving advice to others i hope one day to become a favorite author and use my books to help everyone with life.
E-mail: Kakashi_hero_narutofan@hotmail.com
Gender: Female
Age: 18
MSN: Kingdom_heartsgirl13@yahoo.com
Member Since: July 22, 2006
Answers: 43
Last Update: October 1, 2006
Visitors: 4982
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I have a huge crush and he doesnt feel the same but I really want to be closer friends anyway. He doesnt like going places where he's the only guy so it has to be a group thing. What do you think we should do? I always thought of me having a holiday party and having a sevcret santa and "secretly" giving him me.He also loves the jets so I thought a couple of friends and I could go to the game. I really want something fun that can show him that i'm a fun, cute, sweet girl. Any suggestions? (link)
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Dear,crush
Wow how that brings back memories. For startes those are great ideas lol but don't force yourself on him. I would start off going to a game like you sudjested or as far as going out to eat with a few friends. Dinner convorsations always prove most interesting.
Your friend, Violet
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Things were going GREAT with Nick until Friday afternoon. Earlier that day, he said I could sit by him at lunch since my friends weren't going to be there. I didn't actually end up sitting by him because my friends came back and forced me to be by them. But anyways, then I sat by him at the pep ralley and he said "What happened at lunch? I saved you a seat". I explained to him the story and apologized and then we just joked and laughed the whole time. I really like Nick because of his personality. Everything he says or does makes me smile or laugh. BUT after school, everything changed. Nick's friend, Will, knew that I liked Nick so he asked Nick if he'd want to go to homecoming with me. That made me really mad because I wanted Nick to ask ME. And if I was going to be the person who asked, I wanted to do it myself and not have somebody else do it for me. Well long story short, Nick said no. I have no idea why. Maybe it was because he couldn't make it or maybe it's because he doesn't like me. I really want to know! If I don't have a chance with him, I'd rather him tell me that so I can move on. It's just confusing because all of the signs point to him liking me. He flirts with me all the time! I'm not upset that he said no to me, but I'm upset because now everything is different. He completley avoided me after that and didn't talk to me like he normally would've. I just want things to go back to how they used to be =( Even if that means we are only friends! What should I do? (link)
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Dear,Help me.
Boys are strange. Someimes they want to be with us and other times they avoid us entirly. Well here's what I think. Either he's not ready for a commitment or he's just shy. He very well may like you or hes the type who thinks he can toy with your feelings. As for the whole change in attitude against you that can be very difficuly since i've had it happen to me many times.
First of all I think you should talk to Will then you should talk to Nick face to face and ask him why he's treating you diffrently. Boys can be stubborn but it's up to us girls to be accertive. If he won't listen make him it's only fair. Your friend,Violet
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It helps if you read my other question first. it'll clarify a lot for you! oh, and i'm really sorry in advance- i ask a lot of questions, and some are a little stupid. :-\
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OK. Well, i finaly built up the courage to tell him i liked him. and his response was : "I'm not very good with relationships. but i wouldn't mind staying friends, maybe we could try in the future." alright. here's the thing. i've known him to be very honest. but what if he didn't mean it? are things going to be really awkward between us from now on? was this a bad thing for me to do? and another thing- what if he finally ends up liking me, but i stop liking him? will that make things even more awkward? and what do i do if it happens?
ok, that's it i guess. sorry for allllll the questions. i'm just weird like that.
(link)
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Dear,confused It natural to think this but don't feel like this guy is your whole world eaither...ok maybe that wasn't the right thing to say but anyway boys are plain confusing...as far as things being aqward to be onest i can't tell the future dear but from what your telling me i think that things may be....relationship are something people develope just try and think things through. Your friend Violet
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Okay, so I really really like this boy James. But he hates me. For no reason! Omg. Hes so sweet/cute/fine and I really like him. People try to convince me he likes me but I just know he doesn't. I know this sounds dumb and all but I started cutting myself just because I think my life was horrible [in my opinion] and now this to make it worse! I cant stand It but i like him so much. I want to stop cutting SO bad because its really not the right thing! Please help me with suggestions to stop! I really dont wanna ruin my life by a stupid mistake I made.
Sincerely,
Bloody Wrists. (link)
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Dear,bloody wrists First of all take a deep breath and calm down,even though this guy may not like you maybe he isn't the one for you...i would sudjest you even though it's hard to do let him go...as for your cutting it's good you've relised it isn't the right thing to do...try and think of yourself better relise it isn't your fault things turned out the way they did make sure that you talk to your friends or maybe your school councler they should be able to help you...try to keep yourself away from sharp objects for awhile and do some constructive ways to deal with pain like right down your thoughts and feelings,hang in there i know you can make it. Your friend, Violet
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Upon reading so many other questions and having some of my own I decided to ask the guys out there specifically, (ladies you may answer as well) whether or not you can love more than one person at once. I guess you can substitute like for love as well but I am interested to see what you guys have to say about this. Obviously you can be interested in more than one person, but can you really have equal feelings for two people at the same time? So basically for you guys out there who have girlfriends and ladies who have boyfriends as well, can you love that person and still have equally strong feelings for another person who is not your current partner or is it merely a random attraction? What do you all have to say about this I am curious to find out. :) Cheers! (link)
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Dear,girl crazy You asked a good question the truth is yes you can love more than people at once and it's not wrong...that's why dating around is better than sticking to one diffrent person..there are many diffrent people out there..but somewhere the right one is out there..trust me you'll find her when the time comes. Your friend Violet
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i knew a girl about 3 years ago ,when i see her i used to say hi and that's it this year wat diffrent this at the end of this year ,,, i talked to her alot ,, it was nice ,,,, and at the end of this year i was going to ask her to give me her phone number but i couldn't coz her friends want her to saty with them so i talked to her for short time and i couldn't ask her for her phone number so i think i can get her phone number from some friends but i am just wonderning wat should i do after i get her phone number and wat she will say when she get massage or call from me wat is her responed for that i really like that girl alot so please can i get help,, and i am from libya ,,, so wat should i do ? (link)
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Dear,love struck it seems what your going through is normal you just have the nerves i'd sudjest you talk to one of your friends about how you feel ...if it helps try and ask her to come over sometime take it easy ..you'll get there. Your friend Violet
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ok so i really like this girl. but there is a problem, she is my friends ex. everytime im with her it feels right. we kiss and hold hands. but somedays she acts all weird, like we dont have a "thing". does it sound like she is using me to you? (link)
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Dear,stressing out It sounds as if the girl likes you...but maybe your ex has been talking to her and making her feel uncomfortable around you...try asking her about it next time she acts as if your not gf and bf. As for using you it could be a possibilty...i can't tell you much more than that.hope everything works out Your friend Violet
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Okay 25/F here with major realtionship issues. Recently me and my boyfriend of 7 years decided to have a separation, well more like I decided. So he moved out (we own a house together) and I have now been living alone for 3 weeks. The plan was for him to go get help and for me to sort out my feelings and then he would move back in after a month and then we could see how things went from there. So why did we separate? He is very controlling and jealous, he was constantly calling me names and accusing me of cheating, so basically calling me a whore. He say's he doesn't really think I cheat but he just gets mad and that he's jealous of my job, because they get more attention then I do. I am never allowed to go anywhere and have alienated every friend beacuse he thinks that you should not go out unless your significant other is with you. So there's no "girls night" for me. If I even go to the store he clocks me and gets pissed about how long I take. The longer we're together the less I cuddle, kiss or do anything with him at all. The only time I am intimate with him, I am being forced by him complaining and some sense of duty for the relationship. Basically it's aweful and his touch disgusts me now. Despite all his faults he loves me very much perhaps too much and he has always been there for me when I had tough things to deal with. He wants to marry me and have kids but I am not ready for that, I care about him but for some reason I can't seem to marry him. On top of it all I have formed this infatuation for a co-worker and my BF senses their is something between me and this other guy, if he even new about flirting then he would seriously go down there and beat him to a pulp. So our month break thing is almost up, and I still don't know what I want, he has been going to a Psychologist and he recognizes his problems and I appreciate his effort but I can't seem to make myself "feel" and he says that I just don't care, but I do I just can't explain what it is I feel. If I leave him he will serisouly snap, he already threatened to kill himself when I asked for the separation. I don't know what to do, if he really did change will my feelings all come back or did I fall out of love with him and is it too late? Or am I so focused on this other guy that I am not appreciating what I already have. I feel so lost right now. :( (link)
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Dear,torn apart I gotta say you sound like your really looking for full heart help and i will try my best.If you truly love this guy and he loves you,he should understand about you wanting to take it slow..have you tried praising him about trying to get help? if not try it the more you both convide in eachother the better things will be...as for you Boy friend he sounds way too obsessive explain to him you need some time alone and as far as your job goes explain to him in a nice mannor that he needs to trust you ..remember without no trust there can be no relationship..try and hang in there i'm praying for you. Your friend Violet
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the other week my boyfriend went all quiet for the day. i didnt think anything of it. then a couple of days later he told me that he was quiet because he was wondering if i was the right one for him. but then he said that he knows now that i am.
but today he went quiet again. i asked him what was up and he said 'nothing im just thinking.'
and so i said 'im scared now'... and he goes 'so am i'...
so obviously its scared the living day lights out of me. i love him 2 pieces and dont want to loose him.
i said to him ' i love you' and he usually says back. ' i love you too' but this time he said. ' i know you do'.....
just before he left he said 'dont worry.' cus he cud tell i wasnt right. and i said 'really' and he said yes. a few minuites later i told him that i was still well paranoid. and he said you should be.... but in a niceish way not as if he was trying 2 frighten me...
he still kept kissing me and hugging me and still said that he is coming over tomorrow. but i still feel really paranoid.
please say that is all it is i really dont want to loose him. he is the first person i have ever loved and i cant loose him. it would kill me.
please any help would be brilliant.
thank you. (link)
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Dear,paranoid Acually that might be the problem...if you've been obsessing over a relationship it can lead to worry and that's very understandable however the boy may be expirancing confusion and as i hate to say it may be comparing you to another girl..i wanna wish you the best of luck and i hope things work out for you. Your friend Violet
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hey my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and my mom says that I can't go to a boys house or have a boy over my house even when she's home she says iam way to young for that,but she let my sisters have boyfriends over and have them over when they were only 15.I think the reason could be becouse I have attention deffesince disorder(add).do you think that could be the reason and how do I convince her that iam responsible enough to go to boys houses and have them over mine.Iam in special ed to could that be another reason? (link)
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Dear,Rachel Your mom may be concerned about you remember your mom was a teen too once and she probably had some bad experiances...i don't think that there would be a problem if he came over to your house but that's just me..the best advice would be is you can't always convince parents to give in to what you want..try to have a heart to heart conversation with her and also with your boyfriend or the guy you like...once you step into a guys house your steping into thier territory..it can be scary for your mom since your 17 remember boys can't be trusted they are out for only one thing too...i don't belive being in speacial ed is why your mom's concerned...as i said talk to to her and see what happens, good luck to ya. Your friend Violet
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How do you know when you should go out with someone? (link)
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Dear,Ready to fly It's hard to say really it all depends on where your heart lies with a certain person ..trust is a big issue to if you go out with someone make sure you know where the boundary line lies...to be honest with you...your the only one who can decide that by following how much you trust and care for the person asking you or you asking them. Your friend Violet
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my boyfriend wants to fight with a relative of mine who has a crush on me....REAL CRUSH ON ME..they said that they will have a "till death" fight and i dont know how to stop them...my boyfriend and that guy are really stubbonrn...they may REALLY get one another KILLED...i just need a way to stop them...i am almost 15 and my realtive is 15 and half and my boyfriend is turning 17,thank you (link)
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Dear,Tug of war ...My your in a sticky siduation so i'll see if i can help..first of you can't just hope the fighting will stop unfortunatly, I would talk to your relitive about this whole and explain how you don't want anyone to get hurt and do the same with your boyfriend..if it comes to it you may have to get an adult or adults involved i'm sorry to say but if it prevents death than that's worth it right?..if you'd like to disscuss this in detail with me please contact me at Kakashi_hero_narutofan13@hotmail.com i wish you the best, hang in there. Your friend Violet
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I am a guy, 32 years, even though people say I look and act 25. On May 9 2006, I met this 21 year old girl when she came for a 10-day workshop in my film school from another university some 3 hours drive from my film school. She is in her 3rd year. She gave me the impression that she liked me, always hanging around me, and I started to give her my time. I really got to like her afterwards. She told me she had no boyfriend, as her previous boyfriend, who was a student in her school had graduated and left the town and wasn’t calling her frequently enough the way she wanted and they tended to drift apart. Time could not permit us to start sleeping together before she returned to her school. She told me she was not good with long distance relationship but we agreed to give it a try. We exchanged phone calls everyday, with me doing most of the calling, but then she beeped (flashed) me very often whenever she wanted me to call. About first week of June she stopped beeping (flashing) me like she used to, even though I continue to call her regularly. I wondered if she wasn’t as enthusiastic about our relationship like before. I’ve visited her once and she promised to visit me in my school but she doesn’t until I graduated from my film school last month and left the town. I once told her that it seems we are not as imitate as before and she says it is because she has doubts that I can handle a long distance relationship. When I promised to play my part right, she promised to play hers too. In the last 9 days, I have been putting up in a town some 45 minutes drive from her school doing some screenwriting and I visited her once. She keeps saying she would come visit me in return but keeps saying she is not sure when, until she told me today that she will not come for reasons best known to her. I still do all the calling, she still doesn’t beep (flash) me always claiming she is broke, even when she is from a rich family. However, whenever we chat she sounds as friendly as ever. I have not slept with her or even kiss her, although I am not eager to, because I truly love her. I wonder if all is well, or if I am wasting me time on her. (link)
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Dear,Wasted It may just be that she feels the relationship is dry or more so that she is scared that you won't take the relationship seriously..i belive you should talk to her about this slowly..if you havn't asked her friends do so it's much better when you find out the truth before jumping to conclusions..she also may be very busy and have other things on her mind it's not like she'll wait by the phone every time you call ...well good luck to you. Your friend Violet
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yeah, this might be long, and from my viewpoint its pretty confusing so leave now if you want...
okay, im a sixteen year old male to begin with, and ever since i can remember, ive had five best friends (and i mean BEST, these five people mean more to me than anything else in this world). these five friends consist of four girls and one guy (the guy has nothing to do with this so you can forget him). Well, the problem is that near the end of last year, the girls all started fighting with eachother, even though theyd all been the best of friends since forever. the group ended up split apart, with two girls on one side, two girls on the other, and me and my guy friend stuck in the middle while still being best friends with both sides....so here comes the complicating part...for the whole time i can remember, ive really liked one of my friends (lets call her girl 1). well, girl 1 has always acted like she doesnt want to be more then friends with me. so now one the girls from the other group (girl 2), has told me that she likes me...so i asked her out and weve been going out for a month now. well, ever since i asked out girl 2, girl 1 hasnt spoken to me at all (by the way, the two groups of girls hate eachother a LOT)...so ive been trying to find out why girl 1 hasnt been talking to me...and it turns out that girl 1 really likes me....which sucks because im already going out with girl 2....i want to talk to girl 1 again because i love her to death, but i dont know how to do that...she wont answer her phone when i call, ive sent her emails, text messages, and even stuff through myspace...im about to just go to her house and show up with some flowers or something to show her that i still love her to death, and that the only reason that i didnt choose her is because she acted like she didnt like me....but im afraid that my girlfriend (girl 2) will find out and be mad at me for somewhat obsessing over getting my friend back....what should i do? any help is appreciated... (link)
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Dear,stuck You have a very complicated problem and i'll try to give to a whirl. Ok so you mentioned you pretty much only asked girl 2 out because she liked you..it sounds like girl 1 was really jelous of girl 2..i think that it was a good idea to try and go make mends with girl 1..but if you truly want to try to get together with girl 1 i would talk to girl 2 about that first. Your friendship seems like it was really good at first..but somethings change and you have to accept it..maybe they have indivual problems too girls are weired like that. Your friend, Violet
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Ok so I've liked this guy for the past four years (he used to like me in middle school but I hated him back then because he bullied me). I spent all of high school staring at him and he's stare at me and I'd wonder if there was anything to it but he was Mr Popular and I was a geek (but becoming "cooler" over the years) so something like that wouldn't have worked out in the ninth grade.
This all changed when we graduated and I started going to parties. I showed up to a party where he was there. We were all really drunk and he talked to me and my friend for about half an hour after while waiting for a ride and offered to give us a ride but we declined because his friends were drunk.
The next day week our commencement and when I walked in, he looked at me and started walking towards me but I kind of freaked out and ran away.
Last month I went to another party and he was there too. I basically ignored him through the whole party because my friend who was moving away was there but he was still lingering around sometimes and just when we were leaving, he was going inside and he said hi to me and my friend.
So my question is, I've spent about five years hung up on this guy and I'm sick of it. Does it seem like he's interested at all or should I force myself to move on? It's just that everytime I get a chance with him, I panic and I like him -a lot- and I want some kind of closure to high school. I just don't want to still keep chasing him if he doesn't care. (link)
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Dear,hanging in there I've had a simular siduation with a guy before so i do know what your talking about. People Change over the years but it seems that he's trying to get your attention,next time you have the time to meet him or talk to him stand your ground and ask him why after all these years he's been eying you and who knows you may find something great it all starts with a small step. Your friend, Violet
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ive been dating this amazing guy for about a month now and we met online. i know him through a friend but we met online. the only thing that sucks it that he lives 40 mins away so i wont get to see him much. hes an amazing guy and i never want to lose him. should i keep working at it? (link)
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Dear,love struck i too have dated a guy online and yeah it does suck when they live 40 mins away..he's some advice for ya! DON"T GIVE UP!" if you truly love someone it will work..love like yours doesn't come around every day just remember that so don't give up i'm rootting for ya! Your friend, Violet
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Today is me and my girls 2 month aniversary, and she's grounded so i cant call her or visit her, but she snuck a call to me yesterday, i told her she would get a suprse today, i was goiing to get a white rose sent to her house with a teddy bear and a card, but the probleam is now my dad's bei a hard ass about it and sayin we'll have to do it tommrow plus all of the floral shops in my area are closed today. Im not sure ifi'll be able to reach her today and im worried she'll be disappointed. (link)
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Dear,worried It may be your anneversery and she may be grounded but if she truly loves you then she'll be pationt with you,just try to plan something special when you do celebrate it remember love is a wonderful thing but it's better when your together..as long as your thinking about her and still willing to celebrate you should be fine..if she was grounded it wasn't your fault so there's no reason for her to get mad or upset at you. Your friend Violet
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