BrunetteBeauti's advice column | BrunetteBeauti's Advice About Love Life | Main Page

home view feedback ask questions add as friend advicenators

Gender:

Female

Location:

NeW YoRk

Occupation:

SkOoL sUx

Age:

16

Member Since:

August 26, 2004

Answers:

283

Last Update:

September 1, 2008

Visitors:

15215

Main Categories:

Fashion and Styles

about

advice

I have a child with my boyfriend (been together 3 years with an almost 2 year old). I love him, but I am not "in love" with him...like I don't feel deep down and really don't miss him when he's away, and recently have not even been sexually attracted to him. I have been in love with someone else for 8 years and I believe in my heart that one day we will find eachother again...but it could be a very long time from now. Recently I have decided that I am ready to expand my family (have another baby) and settle down, purchase a home. My boyfriend wants to move to alaska and buy a home together and have another child. I just don't know if I should wait for my true love, or pursue my other dreams with the man I already have...like the song that goes, "If you can't have the one you love, love the one your with". thanks for the advice

There is also a saying that goes "Never leave the one you love for the one you like, because the one you like will leave you for the one they love." In your situation the one you like loves you a lot but if you dont feel the same way it is not fair to him because youre giving him false information and its not fair to you because you're just staying with him because hes already there. Honestly you should listen to your heart, do you want to stay with him or are you ready to leave? You can still remain friends if you do break up with him and discuss matters about your child, but why have another child with someone youre not in love with? you should really think about your decision. Good luck

15/f~~~~
Now, I'm not trying to stereotype here so please don't assume that.
But, I was just wondering:
Would a teenage guy's friends really make fun of him if he was in love with his girlfriend? What I mean is, would his friends mock him for being in love?
I just seem to see it all the time in the media. And yes, I know, you shouldn't believe all that the media tells you. I just wanted to know really if this happens.
Sorry if this is a dumb question. I'm just curious that's all.
And I'd really like to hear from a guy. That's who I'm directing this question to. I don't think it would help much if a girl answered...
Thanks!

Well they would make fun of him sometimes but not seriously because they are friends. A guy is in love with me and none of his friends make fun of him seriously sometimes they'll joke around and say hes "whipped" but thats it. One of my friends was making fun of his friend because hes in love but since theyre friends he doesnt make fun of him to his face he just says if he wasnt my friend i would break them up. since youre 15 guys start gettins mature now and they really wont make fun of another guy for being in love.

so i went out with this kid for 4 and a half months, and he broke up with me cause he didnt know if he wanted a girlfriend, and he was moving (he was moving in 3 months), we thought we'd be going out until he moved, and maybe even longer, but before he left i wrote him a letter saying how im glad were still friends, and he told me how breaking up with me was a mistake and everything, but now he kinda likes my friend. and he came back to visit and they are awfully close, and my friends talked to me about it, and i told her i can't control what she does, but i dont know, lately i've felt like giving up on myself because i feel like now that im starting high school im fading as a person, it seems that nothing is going right and i am losing people, nothings ever drama free anymore. i was talking to him for like an hour on IM, and he was telling me how he remembered everything he said to me the day he asked me out, and at the end of the conversation he told me he loved me. Then i just saw him this past weekend and he still had the letter i wrote him in his wallet but i didn't get to talk to him that much, i just felt out of place whenever i'm around people anymore. i hate that feeling of change. I just want the past and i want things back to normal. I want to be happy but i feel like i'm never given a chance

That's how life is, youre growing up and starting high school and you go through a lot of drama and boys. It seems like this guy really likes you,he said he made a mistake by breaking up with you, I mean he even told you he loved you. You should talk to him more about it because obviously not being with him is hurting you and you should tell him how you feel.

im 13 and a female. everyday me and my bf go to our school library and hang there and we are usually kissing and making out but i dont really want to all i want to do is talk to him and some friends, snuggle close with him, and maybe a odd kiss a day if im in the mood. he love to snuggle with me too but he takes it too far and i really need to be answered tonight cuz tomorrow i might be biking to his house tomorrow and we will be alone and im sorta afraid of what he will do. is that wrong? what should i do? sry its so long.
**sleepiesheep**

hey gurl,
if you're not in the mood then tell him. he doesn't own you so you shouldn't let him do whatever he wants to you. tell him sometimes you just want to talk to him and have a conversation.

good luckkkk

i really like this guy .. but i dont know if he likes me back...everytime i look at him hes looking at me but i dont no if thats because i was looking ... how do i tell him that i like him ?? .... help pleaseeee

well personally i never tell guys I like them unless they ask me if I like them. If you dont want 2 tell him ask a friend 2 tell him for you and tell your friend to ask him if he likes you back.

good luckkk

foshizzle my nizzle ok so i like dis girl and she likes dis other guy and i have liked her since like THE LAST ICEAGE ok AND I REALLY LIKE her ok and i wanted to know some tips on impressing a girl gotcha and i'm assuming you have good answers cause i don't come here just for nothing

well i'm a girl so let her know you like her. find out if she likes you. if she does get to know her better and talk to her. girls love it when guys they like give them attention. when you feel like you have a strong bond then ask her out. you dont have to wear hella bling and be another balla to impress her. just be yourself(unless you dress/act like steve urkel).

good luck

I wnet out with this guy for a year and a day to be exact then i broke up with him because hes much older than i and i like this kid in my grade.. How long before i should date agian?
i was thinkin 4 months?

--13/f--

there shouldn't be an exact time for when you should date again. if you like this kid and he likes you then you should go out with him. you don't have to wait 4 months cause that's a long time and feelings could go. personally i would date whenever a guy i liked asked me out even if i just broke up with my boyfriend. but you should at least wait a couple of days after the break up.

good luck.

ok well I was the one who broke up with my bf, and its been three days and hes ready to ask out another girl! we went out for a month and a half! i mean im only 13/f but still... does anyone else think its weird? i mean im really hurt... what should i do?

hey i had the same problem but it wasnt 3 days later it was the same day! and now he wants to get back with me. so maybe hes just trying to get over you by going out with someone else or trying to make you jealous. if he really didn't have feelings for you he would have broke up with you first.

GooD LuCkk
x0 0x

okk my friend likes this guy. `nd i know for a fact he doesnt like her. me `nd him hung out the other night `nd she called me. `nd shes like oh hes wit u let me talk to him .. so she was talkin `nd stuff .. `nd he got off `nd he was all like "why did u make me talk to her shes so fuckin annoying", then he was goin on about that for a while.
`nd i kinda like him too .. but my friend would get mad at me but he doenst like her .. `nd shes like the kinda girl who juss gets over guys really quick .. but i dont know what to do .. b/c he doesnt like her .. `nd theres chance he might like me .. i juss dont know

omg i have the same problem. if he likes you nd you like him back just go for it, like you sed she gets over guys quickly so she wouldnt be that upset. if he doesn't like her then there's nothing you can do to change that, just do what you want because even if she stops talking to you it wont be for long.

hOpE i HeLpEd
x0....0x

My friend is throwing a party and invited my crush. The thing is my friend said that I have to tell my crush by the end of the party that I like him or she will. I know I have to tell him I just don't want to deal with the potential heartbreak right now. Should I talk to my friend and hopefully convince her not to do it or just tell my crush? Oh and if I tell him his ex is probably gonna be close by since she's invited too... I rate high for good advice! Thanks!

hmm well if you dont want to tell him and you want to know if he likes you back you can get one of your friends to ask him if he likes you and if he says yes then you can go and start flirting and stuff without saying you like him and see where it goes from there. good luck. please rate.

ok here the thing,
i'm going out with this one girl (let's call her g.) now me & "g" have beem going out for around 2-3 weeks. now i like "g" and all that but i also like this other girl. (let's call her sussie)
now me & "sussie" have went out before but she broke up with me.now about a year later i hear from some of her friends that she still has feelings for me. she also acts like she still has feelings for me. she'll like watch me while i'm outside or smile at me & stuff. so wat do i do?
could someoen PLZ HELP ME OUT!!!!!

(i rate high for good advice) -thanks

u should go out with the girl u like more. sussie still has feelings for you so it wouldnt hurt to give ur relationship another shot.
good luck
peace

My ex-boyfriend, and I really need 2 talk, and discuss our break up. But I dont know if I should or not cause we broke up on a bad key. And even if i did talk 2 him i wouldnt know what 2 say. Please help, and i'm 13.
*Sign*
Confused

talk 2 him nd tell him ur sry the breakup ended relli bad

i waz going out with this grl but then i went on vacatin. when i got back i got my freind to break up with her n the day after she called my friends when i waz there and i started callin her names liek i said she waz ugly n anoying n stuff like taht. i herd she cried for like a week or so. so now skool is back and i seen her and she got soo much hotter!!! i wana ask her out but i dont think she wud say yes cuz what i did 2 her so wut am i suposed 2 do !!??

apologize 2 her and ask her out again

Ok well I was going out with this girl who i started to really like. Then all of the sudden one day she broke up with me sayin that she liked me and some1 else. She said that she needed to take a break but she liked this othat kid that goes to my school. Im not sure if we broke up cause i did sumthin or cause we go to different schools. But then l8ter that night she asked me if like next summer we could ever go out again.
ooo yeah im 13/m

wow thts messed up. ask her y she broke up w. u. tell her u cant jus wait 4 her 2 take u bac. thts not how its suppose 2 wrk. jus 4get about her

I really wanna bf but i dn if any guys like me! I LIKE this one guy but he lives in NY and i live in Maine. I also like this guy in my school. The guy in Ny liked me back but i dont think im ready for long distance. Should I go for the guy in my school, that is like ask him out, or should i try to do long distance w/ the kid from NY? Cuz like i dn if the kid from my school likes me or what. But hes always talkin to me and smiling at me. So which one?

definitely da guy @ ur skool. lond distance relationships make ppl grow apart/

ok i really like this one guy but hes popular and im not exactly the most popular kid in school! but i really like him! wut could i do to make him notice me?

hun get his sn nd talk 2 him online. wen u guys becum online friendz talk 2 him in skool. wen u guys becum skool friendz nd ur still 2 shy 2 tell him how u feel then get a friend 2 tell him u lyk him nd if he lyks u bac. if he doznt u guys should still be friendz.
good luc

I have this boyfriend, whom I cheated on 3 times already. (He lives 14 hours away from me, he moved). I love him so much, but sometimes I just get lonely of not having him here and I go out and do stupid things. I love him to death and everytime I cheat on him I tell him. I hurt his feelings so much but he always takes me back. I don't know what to do... it's just sometimes, he doesn't even get mad when I tell him I cheat on him. (Or maybe he just acts like hes not mad, but he really is). I've been with him for almost a year, we BOTH love eachother so much.. I just don't know why I'm always cheating on him if I "love" him... help?

hun u guyz should break up. long distance relationships dont wrk. ur gonna keep cheating on him cuz u feel lonely. so u mite as well jus break up.

ok...ive gone on three dates that were awesome, i thought so and so did my date. i got my first kiss onthe third date and i thought everything was going awesome. but she got out of a 2 yr relationship 3 months ago and still considers her ex her best friend along w/ another guy as her best friend. me and her were messin around and she like gave me a nipple twister when she was layin on me so i flicked her boob and it freaked her out...she like made this wierd face and i said sorry cuz she didnt like it...we kissed l8r that night. then the next day she showed up at my work with the guy that she considers her best friend, not her ex though, and she was like in a bad mood that i l8r found out was cuz i flicked her boob and she wanted to make me feel bad about it. she waited for me outside the front door so when i would get off work we could make up...but i park inteh back for work so i didnt know till she called askin where i was and i didnt wanna talk to her neways cuz she was bein mean to me. we got over it l8r on, and the next day she wanted to come up to c me, but she said that she spent the day w/ her ex, so i got pissed and jealous and told her that she shouldnt come and c me. then she said i was an ass to her, so today i apoligized by surprising her with roses. am i in trouble here likin this gurl with her havin her ex and another guy as her best friends? i dont really want to think that i wasted my first kiss on a gurl that doesnt care about me, cuz she used to say taht i was so awesome and so unlike her ex bf and taht taht was a good thing. plz help, thx.

heyy hun
b relli open 2 her and tell her how u feel. apologize again. dont wry bc she friendz w. her ex. theyre jus friendz.

how do i get my gf from cutting herself?

heyy hun
talk 2 her about it. if she doznt stop get help. take her 2 a conselor or sumthing
xoxo
brunettebeauti

soooorry its long, but i need help :(

Alrighty every1, I have absolutely fallen in love with this boy *Damien - and damien is thee greatest guy ever... if i was able to marry him right now i would!! but see we got into probably one of the biggest fight ever and i think he's gone.. for good :'(! i really dont know what to do with myself now... everything i do is "damien" i eat, sleep, drink, shower, think, talk about damien.... 24-7! i mean i knew i loved him before but tonight i just felt that "this is him" feeling! where you know that this is the person you would spend the rest of your life with... i know its crazy and 'im too young' but i dont care what you say or think because i am in love with him and thats just how it is.... but i really need some advice on getting him back! please, pretty please i am begging anybody!! thank you soo much who ever does help!!

p.s we've been together for 1 year and 2 months and NEVER broke up before... soo yea that also!! thankss!

heyy hun
b honest w. him nd tell him how u feel he probably feels the same way. u both hav 2 apologize 4 da fite. den u could take him out or sumthin.
xoxo
brunettebeauti

<<< Previous Advice Column

Next Advice Column >>>