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I have been going through a really tough time. My serious relationship of 3 yeas ended. The guy ditched me just before marriage. This my 3rd relationship failure. I'm 32. People around me are getting married and kids. I don't have many friends. I'm alone ans cry everyday. My confidence is shaking. I don't hv anyone to share my deepest feelings. I regret many things in life. I feel anxiety thinking about
Read more: http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=666294#ixzz6HK8mB7m2 (link)
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I'm so sorry. However you need to stop being so hard on yourself. I believe things happen for a reason. People come in and out of your life for a reason. Take this time to take care of you.
So because everyone else is getting married and having kids that means you need to do the same? I suggest working on self care and taking care of you. I recommend listening to Mel Robbins and Gabrielle Bernstein. It's time to turn the page and start a new chapter.
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So apparently this guy that I like had a crush on me in the past (and might still? It was recent), but another girl is super forward about her crush on him, like leaning her head on him and stuff, etc. He usually looks pretty awkward but is still good friends with her. Him and I only recently finally started talking and texting each other. She's much more bold than me... it seems like he might be starting to like her. What do i do?? I used to be pretty cold (in order to hide I liked him), and recently started opening up a bit, and he is starting conversations and stuff now a lot more since then. But she is a lot closer to him and I don't know if he still likes/can like me again. Any tips on what to do? :') (link)
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Ask him! Whats the worse he could say? No?
You won't know until you ask. And just because this girl is outspoken does not mean a thing. He might be flirting with her to make you jealous..but the best way to find out is to talk with him.
Good luck!
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Should i break up my 7 year marriage?
My husband is a gambler and we are aleays broke
I recently met a man who is a widower and livling
with his sister i like him but I think it is too soon for him to move in,
Please help
I am 53 Gentlemen in question are 63
Thank you (link)
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Have you tried fixing it? Have you gone to counseling? Has your husband gotten help?
I understand you maybe aggravated with the situation. I suggest trying to fix it first before moving on to another relationship. And even if you've tried fixing it why not give yourself a break and be single for a little. Why rush into this other relationship?
Good luck!
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okay so I like this dude named lucifer. We dont have any classes together or anything and when we text i always hit him up and today was like the first time we talked in person I just walked up to him and was like what class do u have next and he said computers why and i said oh i was just wondering. And im stuck should i stop hitting him up and wait for him to hit me up? should i just forget him and move on? i just really need help. (link)
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Why don't you just ask him if he wants to hang out? What's the worst he could say? No? If you really like this guy you don't want to regret not taking a chance and asking him. Maybe he feels the same way. Whatever happens will happen. Good Luck!
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I am a 27 year old female and their is this guy that I like that goes to the college I go to and he is 40 years old. I wanted to know if it's a bad idea for me to ask for his number? Would it make me look desperate? Should I just sit and wait around for him to ask me? Is he to old for me? (link)
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This is really something you have to decide. You have to weigh the pros and cons. One of the pros being that it's nice to be in a relationship and it's nice to have companionship. One of the cons being that he is a lot older. Now that's not bad but it's definitely something to think about. He might have already been through marriage or has kids. Or maybe he doesn't want kids. I feel like at the age of 27 you still want to experience things. I feel like 40 year olds have been there done that. Again it's up to you and how you feel.
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im girl 17, im in 3rd year in high school... i told my classmate(boy) who is also my crush that i like him, in the concrete i gave him a note, saying i like him bc , i felt really relieved after i told him...two days later, i asked him to talk about it bc he didnt give any respond and i wanted to how he feels , during school (we didnt study , we just played games etc), i asked him if we could go and talk somewhere private , he said it is nice that i told him about my feelings for him, he repeated it 5 more times :D :D, he also told me that he know how hard it must´ve been for me to hide my feelings from him... then he said he doesnt have time for relationship bc he has activites besides school (he plays guitar, he dances)...and also he told me he firstly wants to develop more spiritually..(if that makes sense) bc we go to catholic church , ..and then he hugged me saying that we should continue to be friends and he told not to act nervous before him,
if he´s my classmate should i continue to be friend with him ? , should i ignore him when the new school year starts, or should i talk to him like we used to ?,
THE MAIN QUESTION: he asked the whole class if we want to spend some days on his family´s cabin, i like the post on fb he wrote about it, but i dont know if i should go, wouldnt it be awkward? i didnt say goodbye to him on last day of school, i just ignored him, but i met him yesteday and we briefly said hello to each other ...so should i go or not ?? please help me :)
i thought he liked me:/..thats why i told him..if i knew i would never told him...now i guess i ruined my friendship with him..
i also didnt say anything about rejection to my family or my friends..im just kinda ashamed..my one cousin and my best friend know that i like him but they dont know i got rejected :/
PS: he doesnt want to be priest or something like that he is just little bit more religious (link)
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It's up to you! From the conversation that you had with him it sounds like he was flattered but doesn't want a relationship right now. It's up to you of whether you want to go or not. It will only be awkward if you make it awkward.
In high school I had a crush on one of my friends. I was embarrassed and didn't want to say anything. When I did I felt awful but he assured me that he was flattered but didn't feel the same way. We became friends after that...yeah it was weird but I got over him and started dating someone else.
It's totally up to you and how you feel with it. You have to feel comfortable but you also have to respect his wishes. Good luck!
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Edit
So I like this guy (he's a junior, I'm a freshman) but I don't know how to talk to him :(
School is over... he knows me, like he knows that I exist, we talk VERY briefly before, but he doesn't remember. I don't know hwo to talk to him... I have him on Instagram & Facebook... but it's weird to just message someone you don't know out of the blue.
What should I do? I don't wanna seem weird or creepy. Please help. (link)
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Why don't you message him? Or maybe comment on his photos or something? Do you have a mutual friend? Maybe you guys could have a group outing and find out more about him. Does he have any interest on social media? (His favorite movie, tv show, book, etc). Maybe comment on something that he likes...maybe you like it to. Common interests are always great conversation starters. I would reach out to friends and maybe people who know him. I met my husband through a friend and we've been together for 9 years :) Good luck!
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If your the breadwinner of a relationship of 4years and the other mate leaves to stay somewhere else because they stressed about not having a job or being able to do more and not tell you where they staying, and they haven't had a stable job in 4years, Do you stay with them or leave? (link)
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Have you talked to your partner? Have you already come up with a plan?
I would say if you've already talked to your partner about contributing then maybe it's time for you to move on. It takes two to make a relationship and it takes two to make it. If your partner is not willing to contribute it's time you move on and be with someone who does. You should not have to take care of your partner you both should be working hard. Good luck!
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My bf talks to girls sometimes and I get very jealous because I'm scared of losing him. He's stopped talking to a few because of this but I feel it's very unfair and selfish of me to let him do that. So how do I stop being jealous of these girls and trust him???? I've got major trust issues btw
I think it's because I think these girls are beautiful and I'm ugly. And they game (which is his favorite thing ever) and I cant stand it....,,,,,,, and they're close by and I'm all the way across the world long distanxe (link)
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Has he ever given not to trust him?
I totally know where you're coming from..my ex was very touchy feely with other girls and I didn't appreciate that. That's one thing but his your boyfriend ever done or said anything to these girls that you know of? Think of it that way. Without trust in the relationship what do you have? Trust him. If you're worried talk to him but don't make him stop being friends with other girls. You are with him. He chose you for a reason! Just enjoy being together.
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So I have to give a little bit if background. I went on a birth control, shortly after I was feeling really sad and didn't want to be around anyone. Eventually I just found myself crying randomly everyday and just inhappy with everything and I was insecure. Of course this led to problems in my relationship, I was insecure and no longer trusted my boyfriend of 3 years( he did absolutely nothing different from before). Now I am off the birth control and am getting much better but I still have really big problems with trusting him and I would just like to hear some suggestions on how to rebuild that trust and maybe get back to the way we were before. I am a female and i am 20 (link)
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In terms of the birth control I would definitely speak to a doctor. When a doctor puts you on birth control its trial and error. Not all women take the same birth control because it affects them differently. In terms of the situation with your boyfriend I'm not sure I understand why there is a trust issue. Did he do something to trigger you? Or did he lie about something? I think the best thing is to talk it out with him. Tell him what's troubling you and how you feel.
Peace & Love,
Advice Mistress
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Hello, if a bloke flirts with you, that means he's only flirting with you or is there anything behind it? Thanks (link)
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As an outsider it's hard to tell. Maybe you should just ask him flat out or maybe ask him out on a date. Whatever happens happens.
Peace & Love,
Advice Mistress
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how do I know if he wants to be friends or something more (link)
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Well has he asked you on a date? Has he mentioned that he likes you? It sounds like you might need to talk to him to find out. I'm not sure what your relationship is but if you like him just tell him or better yet flirt.
Peace & Love,
Advice Mistress
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Mt boyfriend wants me to sing for him but I don't know what song I should sing.... Any ideas on what I could sing? (link)
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What song makes you think of him? What song describes your relationship? Make you Feel My Love by Adele is beautiful. Weak by Jojo is cute (I know these artists covered the songs). Sing from the heart that's what matters. Don't think too much about the song!
Peace & Love,
AdviceMistress
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20/f
I don't know how come,but literally every girl is beautiful and I am not. I always ruin photos,they look gorgeous and then there's me. I'm 160 cm tall and I'm plus size but not fat. I just don't feel good being me. I feel ugly and am ugly. Why is everyone blessed with beauty and I am not? I am dressed up most of the time,I have nice clothes on,jewelry,make up,everything. I try to eat healthy,I exercise an hour and a half three times a week. Yet despite all of that I'm still ugly. I can't even get a boyfriend,and my best friend will be married in 2 days. In short I'm simply desperate. (link)
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I think you shouldn't be so hard on yourself. I think the one thing you need to do is love yourself. I personally use to beat myself up about the way I looked but in the end this is what God gave me. Don't put yourself down it's not going to help you. You only have one life live it!! You deserve to just as much as anyone else. How do you expect someone to love you if you don't love yourself?
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I have been dating this guy for a while now.we are in a long distance relationship. Last night after I spoke to him,he said "be mine,always be mine".
What does that mean?I kinda got confused! If we are dating,am I not already his? (link)
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I wouldn't think to much into it. He was just saying that he cares about you. I would ask him what he really meant but then again don't think too much about it. It was sweet.
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21/f, 27/m
I have been friends with almost all of my exes. Some of them are close friends (the ones that were not serious and dated when I was in middle school/high school). I don't see them as often and I don't talk to them as often, whether or not if they are my close friends.
He is friends with this girl who was his first serious relationship... And for some reason, it bothers me.
I want to be okay with it because it's not fair that I'm friends with all of my exes but I have a problem with him being friends with... I don't know how many but her in particular. How can I be okay with it? How can I stop being paranoid?
I remember he told me he was planning on giving her stuff back. We've been seeing each other for a couple of months but not exclusively. He's told me he doesn't like her anymore but I can't help but worry he may want to start things up again with her since they only broke up in the beginning of the year.
How can I be okay with it? How can I stop being paranoid? How can I stop thinking too much into it? (link)
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Have you told him how you feel? It's tough especially if it's his first love? Are they talking constantly? Because if that's the case then he needs to get his priorities straight. I don't think it's okay to talk to your ex when you're in a relationship. They are an ex for a reason. I don't talk to any of my exes. Yes I've tried in the past to make a friendship work between us but it never did because they was always hurt feelings or an argument. If you're going out with someone it's best to get rid of the extra baggage (ie your exes). I would really talk to him and tell him how you feel that is really the only way to fix things. Chances are if you feel like something is wrong than it normally is. Listen to your gut.
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20/f
There was this guy in college that I confessed my feelings to. He was a bit startled by my confession but he said we could try dating after our exam term is over. After 2 months he hasn't sent me a single text. We live in different towns. It is clear to me that he doesn't like me. I'm incredibly mad that he wasn't honest. I told him that it's ok if he doesn't like me back,that I understand and we can still stay friends. In spite of that he insisted he likes me. And then he went without even acknowledging my existence. I have an exam in 2 days and he'll be there too. I hate liars from the bottom of my soul. I will have a hard time resisting my urge to rip him apart. Confronting him will not help because he just avoids the subject. So,how do you suggest I should act around him? I'm a medical student and I am here to help people,not hurt them. But I really have an urge to kick this guy's a**. (link)
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I think you should rise above it. I would just act natural and friendly towards him. It's loss in the end anyways. You can just say 'hi how are you?' and end it there instead of getting into the whole thing. Maybe he was nervous to tell you that he didn't feel the same way. Regardless, you should move on because he's the past and you should be looking toward your future.
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Dear Vikki
I'm 24 and from South Africa. I have been in a relationship for almost 7 months now and before that we were only friends. I love him a lot and care about him a lot, but at times I feel that my insecurities gets in the way and it ends up in us having an argument about something small and stupid. See we have a long distance relationship at the moment and it is mostly when he cannot have decent conversation at night because his busy and then I start thinking "maybe he doesn't want to talk to me" , "maybe he doesn't find me interesting anymore and he will leave me for someone else" and I do know that he cares for me a lot and that he loves me and as soon as I think I have these feelings under control, it creeps in again. I don't want to lose him, because I was insecure and clingy. I never was like this in the beginning. I was cheated on before and most of the times it is when I'm away from him, when we are together, I don't have it and because of this it makes things hard for me. I care about people real fast and they can actually hurt me with words. How do I get past this? How can I get past my insecurities and not be clingy when I feel like these emotions are creeping in? I'm not jealous when it comes to being his girlfriends, because I know what type of guy he is. I know he will never cheat on me, but because I don't always see myself as beautiful, I'm sometimes afraid he will leave me for someone more beautiful than me. The guy that cheated on me used to say to me, that I shouldn't think that someone can love me, because there feelings will change. I was so deeply hurt.
Is there any advice you can give me? Guess I'm just looking for someone to talk to that I don't know personally!
Thanks!
(link)
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I've always heard people say 'you have to love yourself before anyone else can'. Sometimes guys have a different way of showing how much they care. My fiancé use to be one of those guys and it would bother me to no end. I realized my worth though, and if I was going to stay around with him he needed to try a little harder. I don't think you're the problem. Just because he isn't always talkative doesn't mean you are the problem. 'The only trouble with long distance relationships is doubt'. If you love him and care about him just let him be and don't take it personally. Good luck!
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my girlfriend of 3 years is constantly looking for fights. she says she gets mad when i don't give her attention and that's why she's always wanting to fight about nothing. when we start fighting she gives me the lowest blows though. she's always reminding me that she can get any guy she wants. which i already know but i don't need to be reminded. she calls me selfish and the worst boyfriend she's ever had. she's constantly telling me that if she wanted a crappy relationship she'd have stayed with her ex. not only that but she's very controlling, anytime i go out i have to pretty much ask permission. i don't like her talking to guys but all of her friends are guys and she knows how much i hate it but does it anyway. what do i do? i've tried so many times to let her go but i can't, i really love her. i just don't know how to get her to stop without starting another fight. (link)
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I know you probably don't want to hear this but she's very manipulative and controlling. Both qualities are not attractive at all. I would usually suggest sitting down with her and talking it out but it sounds like she is too selfish to consider anyone else's needs but herself. Do you see yourself with her for the rest of your life? It's your choice. From the sounds of it, it doesn't sound like you're too happy. Maybe it's time for you to move on and leave this girl and get a girl who is going to treat you well and be supportive. You don't want a girl who is going to hold you back from living life. You have to think of yourself. Why are you going to let someone treat you like that? Just think about it. Good luck!
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21/f
I'm having a hard time right now. There are things that are changing in my family environment and now things are changing in my relationships.
There's this guy. We dated when I was 17 years old. We went on and off when I was 19 years old, we weren't really seeing anybody in between those times. Our on and offs were pretty much him saying that he wanted to move on, and three days later he'd come back. We were going through a rough patch of him telling me to move on and then coming back asking me to stay. We fought constantly over the past 4 years... But recently, things got better. We stopped fighting. I thought because we've been through so much we don't fight as often anymore. When we get into an argument, we apologize and we automatically know what to do and we make up within those 1-3 hours. I thought things were going well.
I saw him two days ago and he seemed fine... But after I got out of the car things changed. He avoided me, he barely spoke to me, etc. I told him instead of keeping me in the dark, what was going on, he said he didn't want to "continue this complicated relationship anymore" and that he wanted to "start moving on" again... Since he was planning on moving to Japan.
I hate it when he says that. About Japan, he told me these news sometime last year. He told me he wanted to move to Japan for a couple of years and work for a company before he goes off to medical school because after medical school, he would not get a chance to go. I was in denial.
For the past year I was trying to believe what other people told me. The people that I trust the most and has a pretty good grasp about him, believe that he won't go and that it's just a dream that he has since he has this habit of running away from his problems and trying to escape reality and if he did move, he'd only be there for a month because it's quite pricey and the work environment there is terrible. His friends told me that they don't know what he's going to do, and that maybe he's doing it now because he feels like this is the only time to do it and that he will be back for medical school. Others? They say they don't know him well enough to tell whether or not if he's going to go.
To be honest, I've been having a hard time grasping onto that idea. The more he talks about it, the more he tells people, the longer time passes, it makes it hard for me to try to believe he's not going because I don't want him to. And I feel selfish thinking and hoping he wont go.
I've been needing the reassurance that he won't go but I feel more sad when the time may come.
I fear that if he goes, what if he finds someone else? What if things do work out there and he's there for years? To even think about that, it scares me and worries me. His decision on going makes me feel like I'm not important enough for him to stay and he's leaving me behind instead.
What am i going to do? I've been trying to be the best for him because i want him to stay but it comes off as not enough. Do you really think he's not going to go at this point or is it still a dream he has to escape medical school? (link)
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I have been in this situation and it's not an easy one!
I totally understand how you're hurting and you can't move on and you feel stuck. I was on and off with a guy for awhile. It would be great and then we would end up falling apart. I think one thing you need to know is that you need to think about you. You need to worry about yourself! I have always believed if you are meant to be with that person, you will be with that person. Good luck!
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