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Q: He's seventeen, a senior, male. I'm sixteen, a junior, female.
He's my best friend.
He knows me. He calls me, he texts me everday. He tells me about his day and I tell him about mine. He know's my secrets and I know his.
He protects me. He beat up my ex-boyfriend when he slapped me. He doesn't let anyone hurt me, inside or out. He wont allow me with boys he doesn't approve of.
He cares about me. He hugs me when I cry. He holds my hand when I'm anxious, or nervous. He tickles me when I'm down. He wrestles me when I'm in that goofy mood. He's the funniest person I know.
We have never kissed, or had any kind of romantic relationship. We aren't like that.
But he's dating a new girl. She doesn't like me because of how close I am to him. He says its not, and that it won't, but everything I've mnetioned before is starting to fall apart, and I don't know how I can live with out him...
What am I supposed to do?
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I think that Zane's a little confused (sorry Zane, I almost always agree with you, but I differ here) about the possibilities for relationships with the opposite sex.
If you are a straight girl and have a best girl friend who you share secrets with, who makes you happy, who you trust and who trusts you, does that mean you should date her? No. There has to be something else for that to work. Chemistry, or whatever you want to call it.
I'm a girl whose best friend is a guy. We get along ridiculously well. We laugh at the same jokes, we can talk about anything, even our deepest darkest secrets, he knows he can (and has) call me in the middle of the night to help him through a rough spot, and we both share a ridiculous love for a certain Canadian classic prog rock band. Do I want to marry him? No. In fact, he's going to be my "man of honour" when I get married next month. So I get where you're coming from.
You've got to have a talk with your friend. I've had this discussion with mine before. What to do about the jealous girl/boyfriend. I just told my fiance flat-out that I wasn't going to put up with any jealousy. He's told his girls the same. There's the occasional suspicion, but if I spend time with them they see exactly how non-threatening I am.
That's what I suggest for you. Spend time with the two of them. Let her see that you don't feel that way for him. Make comments about what a cute couple they are, tell him you approve of his new lady (in front of her), show her that you are not going to try to get in her way. Just avoid anything that even has potential to look flirty or possessive. Then the mystery is lifted, and she knows that you're not "that woman", you're "that friend".
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That is really good advice... but the thing is, I kind of reeeeeally don't like her either haha. I haven't told him that cause I know he's happy and whatever but I think he knows how I feel so he doesn't want me around her and I don't really wanna be in that position to make him choose between me and this other girl... ya know?
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bio
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My Personal Forum
My name is Amanda and I'm 26 years old. I'm currently studying electrical engineering. Armed with a fairly odd sense of humour and a sunny outlook on life, I'll take on just about anything. I'm also cussedly stubborn, which has its ups and downs. Things get tough sometimes, and I've never been one to run from it.
In my last 8 years with Advicenators, I've gone from honours student to failing out of university (and getting back on top again!), from single to married, from tenant to homeowner.
Until lately, I have been struggling with a diagnosis of bipolar disorder and OCD, which had basically ruined my life and taken just about everything from me. I'm thankful every day for every experience I've had because of this ordeal, because it's helped to make me who I am today. Things like that really make you appreciate what you do have. Now that I'm back in work and school and starting to become myself again, I couldn't be happier. I credit Advicenators with saving my life back when I was a teenager, which is a big part of why I'm still here.
I won't necessarily give you the answers you want to hear, but I'll always be honest and do my best to help.
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Info
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Gender: Female Location: Ontario, Canada Occupation: Student Age: 26 Member Since: February 14, 2006 Answers: 2207 Last Update: September 26, 2016 Visitors: 92429
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