About Ronlina
I have some experience with a bunch of things. Talk to me about keeping reptiles, LGBT stuff, piercings, friendships, babysitting, baking, relationships, piano playing, family problems, music, comic books, music, the ancient maya, dysfunction in general, social awkwardness, blah blah blah. So throw your questions at me. dance and sing and run among the poppy blossoms or something.
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Gender: Female
Location: United States
Occupation: Artist, Musician, Blah blah, Baker and cake decorator
Age: 20
AIM: ask me.
Member Since: July 28, 2004
Answers: 111
Last Update: February 10, 2008
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okay. so i dated this girl for a while. and we seemed to have a really good connection with each other. we were into the same things, we were both sarcastic smartasses, and we both liked doing the same kinda stuff. and well when i met her she was in the process of breaking up with her boyfriend. and so i was more of the friend to turn to than anything else. then slowly we started to date like after they broke up. and for about a weekend we were very into each other, and things seemed to be wonderful. then as the weekend ended she said she didn't feel the same way about me as i did about her. and so i decided to sit back and wait until she was really ready for a relationship because after some talking we kinda realized she needed some time to get back into the swing of things. and it was during this time that she began to change. she became mean, she began just totally ignoring me for days on end. the phone calls ceased. there would be whole days when i'd hear nothing from her. then i'd talk to her a bit and that was it. and now finally i come home to find out she spent the last couple days drinking, partying, and hanging out with sleazy guys. and i instantly became very mad and jealous. and i just wanna know. is it wrong for me to be mad? for me to not want her around? for me to tell her she's changed and become someone i don't know anymore? i told her not to contact me any longer, and that she had become someone else, someone i didn't know or love. and now in hindsight i kinda wanna know: was it wrong?
You aren't wrong for being angry - she obviously didn't think of your feelings when she decided to go out drinking with sleazy men. You have every right to be mad, and if you don't want her in your life anymore, then you have every right to tell her not to contact you any more.
Just keep in mind, she must be more unstable than you'd realized after the breakup. She found herself leaning on you for support and moving into another possible relationship too fast. I can picture this making her feel really insecure and making up for it by making things even worse for herself.
If it seems like she's calming down, and you felt up for it, (or if she initiates it) it wouldn't hurt to talk to her. This all depends on how deeply you feel for her. Is there a chance she might let go of this new crappy personality if given the chance? Give it time, but if you still feel you want to sever all ties with her, stick with it. Being friends with her after this would be uncomfortable at best.
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thank you, that was solid sound advice
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