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my friend alyssa was seeing this guy ryan but they broke up bc she cheated on him. shes in love with this new guy tai they went out brok eup but shes still hooked on him. alyssa doesnt liek ryan any more and says she doesnt care if her friends like him but i feel likeid be betraying her if i did.. me and ryan have been talkin for a few weeks now. just online and on the phone and were making plans to hang out & stuff.. hes such a great guy and has the best personality. do you think its wrong that ryan & i are hanging out and talking??? me and alyssa have been friends for 4 years but she says its ok..i think shes too wrapped up with tai right now but.. i dont want to ruin our friendship at all... what do you advise..??

-kristi

I wouldnt call it betrayel...but maybe your friend is so caught up in this guy and shes trying to get over him too fast. Maybe thats why she keeps saying "its ok its ok." One day seriously talk to her and tell her that you like this guy and you wanna hang out more etc..ask her how she feels. Tell her to be completely honest and if she doesnt feel comfortable you`ll back off. But if she says "its ok" when you have this serious talk with her..then my opinion is that you should keep getting to know him. I mean, its not like you didnt care and hooked up with him right? So i think iif you talk with her and shes alright..then go for it.
-melissa

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Ok, here's what's going on... My boyfriend, we'll call him bob, has been living with me secretly for about 2 weeks now. My dad, just found out that he was here yesterday morning, and my dad was very mad. Then last night, my dad found out about it and made him leave, bob left and came back, and now my stepmom just saw him leave. So I'm really really really grounded right now. I don't know what to do or tell my parents, I can't kick Bob out because he has nowhere to go, literally. He has a pretty bad story though. Should I tell my parents his story and risk being able to be with him? Or should I lie to my parents more?

Tell your parents everything..they might be cool about it and they might be able to help out and make bobs life a lot better. Its worth the risk because even if they dont care..you can still get around them. Tell them everything and explain you dont want to lie anymore..they should reespect you for that and do something to help

good luck!
-melissa

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I've been going out with my boyfriend for 4 days now, and before that we were really close. Well, he's living with me now, and he's taking up the majority of my time. My parents are not okay with him staying here, and I'm grounded for them catching my boyfriend here a few times. So, I don't have much time for my friends, the only time I really have, is with my boyfriend, but that's only because he lives with me. I've tried talking to my friends, but it doesn't get anywhere. What should I do? Please help, I'll rate.

Ive seen this happen all the time with people I know. Your lucky because you and your bf have only been goin out for 4 days..theres still time to save your friendship with your friends. You should tell them you dont want to lose them and you wanna have a night on the town with just the girls. The key is that you need to be consistant. You cant just hang out with them once and not hang out with them again for a month. Im sure you know all that already though. Balance things out between your friends and your bf and you`ll be extremely happy.
-melissa

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theres this girl at my school who really likes me and this other guy. both us guys like her and where like best friends. if 1 of us ask her out she says she dosnt want to hurt the others feeling. so i want 2 know if i should wait or move on. i really like her.

ill rate good
thanks.

Talk to your best friend about it.Who knows..maybe he`ll say "you know what, i see you like her more, so i`ll back off." But if you both ssay you really like her..i wouldnt make a move. Why ruin a good frienship? im sure you understand. Just stay friends if you both really like her

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My sister was raped and killed about a year ago ( we havent found out who it is yet but they're still looking)and I lately I have been see her well her ghost and she always says some thing but I cant hear her like she just moves her lips and I want to tell my mom but I'm afriad she will put me in some kind a hospital or something but about a week ago my sister came back and she made me fallow her some how I mean she walked through the wall and I just had to fallow her and when I did it I found an old beat down house and I really really wont to show it to some one because I think it might be the guy that killed her

Hey i think your mom is someone who would support you and listen to ou..so i would talk to her about it. Whats the worst that will happen? She could say "your immagining things" but at least try. Your sister is reaching out to you..dont ignore it! You`ll regret it if you do. Just go for it! If she doesnt beleive you find someone else you can trust
-melissa

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Okay, I have been sick for almost a week now, I have really bad diarrhea and I can't keep any food down! Everytime I eat it comes up, I even took three bites of a yogurt and it came up. My mom refuses to take me to the doctor and I am starting to feel weak. i usually get dehydrated really easily and now when i drink it doesnt stay down either. My mom keeps an attitude towards me when i tell her what is going on and she says she cant afford to take me to the doctor, WHAT DO I DO?

Im really sorry you cant afford it. Its sad, but in an emergency, many people who cant afford medical care go to the ER for help. Tell your mom to take you there...
If that doesnt work calling sounds like a good idea. But really..MAKE her take u..this is serious! I go to school with the doctors daughter..do you kno the docs kids? Maybe they can help u out..or try the school nurse..try everything!
-best of luck

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ok i know this isn't exactly sex related, but it's close enough. today i was putting on deodorant, and accidently got some on my chest. as i was going to rub it off, i notice that my right nipple was a different texture than my left-it felt like, rougher. also, the area surrounding it felt almost numb. is this normal?? i've never noticed anything like this before, but then again i don't often feel my chest that often, so i don't know if it's normal or not. any help would be greatly appreciated!! thanks so much

You could be developing breast thingys (lol forgive me i forget what they are called). Suction things perhaps? Bah lol. Are there small circles around that nipple? If so it could be that. The small dot things is for nursing. If its numb..maybe your PMSing? I know it sounds weird but i read that the signs of a women getting her period can consist of sore breasts. It could just be that your nipples are different, which is fine. Look this up online for more info or talk to a doctor next time you go. Its all confidential
-melissa

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My daughter does not want to know me and is trying to exclude me from the rest of the family i am heartbroken she cant see that i love her and my other children she is married and has children of her own please find me some answers as to why this is happening

How close were you two when she was a teenager? You seem to be shocked that she isnt close to you, so im assuming everything was all right before? Well maybe shes just being independant and wants to be on her own..maybe there was a grudge she held against you, maybe shes just depressed and its not because of you. The only way to know for sure is to talk to her. Theres a million possibilities out there...the only way to find out is to ask. If she doesnt want to have anything to do with you, have your husband or another relative talk to her. This is sad and im sorry to hear it because I plan to be close with my mom forever...but if you extend your hand out to her and show her your there, its up to her to make the next move. Its up to her to make the changes. You just continue to be there for her.
I hope everything works out
-melissa

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is it true that after 16 a girl stops growing?? if this is not true then what age it is?

The age really does vary. Some girls stop growing at like age 11 or 12 when they hit puberty..others grow until late teens. Generally by age 18 or 19 all growing is complete. But the age varies from as young as 11 to 12..all the way to 18 or 19.
-melissa

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My best friend and I like the same guy. The thing is, he is dating my best friend. But she and he both know that he likes me also. He wants to be with both of us, but I don't want to hurt my best friend so I think I should back off. What should I do?? Thanks!

I think you should back off also. If both him and her know you like him..it can be a pretty awkward situation. Back away from it right now because A : He has a gf and B: shes your best friend. Maybe someone way down the line things will work out but dont wait on it. Dont let a guy get inbetween you.
-melissa

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i think a guy i like likes me. I want to ask him out, but i've never had a bf and i would rather him ask me. But he's shy so i dont think it's gonna happen. What a good way to ask him out, or find out if he likes me for sure. Plz help, i really like him.

Get a friend to see if he would go out with you, and maybe your friend can hook you up. If your friend convinces him not to be shy..he could ask you out and everyone will be happy. Its even better when the friend is friends with both you and him.
Good luck and i hope everyting works out

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Will a yeast infection go away on its own or what can you do to get rid of it?

No it can poetentially get worse. Look it up online, there might be some "at home tricks" to get rid of it...but im pretty sure you have to get special cream to get rid of it. I hear its a pain in the ass. Good luck with everything!
-melissa

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Ok, in school I'm in the "popular group" and my friends are really nice and everything but sometimes they really annoy me. Here's why. Whenever a guy asks them out they'll like automaticlly say yes (even if they don't like them), and when a guy dumps them or they dump a guy they'll be going out with someone else within an hour. Anyway, for some reason this really bugs me. I don't really no why either. Now a guy asked me out and I said no because I don't like him and now they keep calling me too picky. What do I do?

Never do something you dont feel comfortable with. You did the right thing, and your friends are really not making such great choices. Perhaps you should tell them how you feel..tell them people like them are viewed as prostitutes.
If they refuse just be like "OK u guys have your ways..and i have mine..lets just leave it at that"
if THAT doesnt work..then seriously consider hanging with different ppl.
Its ok to chill with people who r different from you (like these girls) but when it gets out of hand and starts to get to you, its too much
-melissa

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if a guy sees this question he will know wat i mean.

I have a problem. I am a christian kid but im slipping away from the lord because of things i look at. if ya know wat i mean. I cant stop. I try but nothin works. If you can help, please do

its nothiing horrible..its not like your having premarital sex. BUT if you really really think this is wrong and you want to stop...

a. try and get a gf who can take the place of the porn mags. Im not saying have sex with her bc obviously thats against your morals. But i think if you get a gf you`ll be better off

b. burn the mags..or stop reading them gradually. For instance..if you look at them every day cut down to every other day.

hope i helped

-melissa

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my family is very religious. so when they found out that i had sex with my ex boyfriend a while back they went crazy. i promised that i wouldnt do it again, but now that i am seeing someone else it's getting harder and harder to say no. i'm only 17, i know thats young, but should i wait until i am married for my family? or should i just give in for myself?

If your ready, then go for it. Your old enough to make your own decisions. Dont wait just for your family...your your own person and your free to do what you want! I understand that your family is religious..so next time just dont say anything to them. That will prevent them from going crazy etc. Hope helped...remember to folllow your heart
-melissa

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do u have to not be a virgin to be put on birth control??

not at all. It can be used for sexually active women, or by virgins just to regulate their periods.
-melissa

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13/f...Ok, so I'm a really shy person when it comes to guys. I like this guy named Tim. I think he stares at me in spanish and sometimes science because I can see it out of the corner of my eye, ya know? In science the teacher stands like a few feet in front of Tim. So naturally I'm looking up at the teacher because he's talking lol. Yeah anyway, Tim looks at me a lot. He likes glances over at me. I think he might think I'm looking at him instead of the teacher. I know he's really shy also so should I strike up a conversation? And do you think it's possible he likes me? Thanks

yeah i definately think he could like you. Hes showing obvious signs lol. Strike up a convo..talk about the school bball game, grades,teachers,weather, anything!
good luck :)
-melissa

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Everybody I've asked has said different things about it but when is the best time to have sex so you wont get pregnate, alot of people say to do it when your on your period because its less likely, is that true? thanks a ton!!

You can get pregnent anytime. Right before you have your period, you ovulate.(like a week before you start your period) DONT have sex during this time. Ive heard that right after your period is better, but dont take chances. If i were you i would have sex during this time AND use protection.
-melissa

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me and my boyfriend have been going out for a week now an everyhting was cool the first 2 days but on the third day he called me and said that he was going to take shower then call me back but he never did, he still didnt call me yet what should i do next?

its not a big deal that he didnt call back, dont worry about that ok? But if it becomes a habit and hes never calling you back after a few more times, talk with him
-melissa

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I'm 14 and this guy i'm good friends with it 15, of course he is your average, out of control teenage guy. All we ever talk about is sex and everything, even school related subjects seem to trace back to it. He's already told me that he wants the first time to be with me BUT he's got a girlfriend. I have asked him if he talks about this with her and he always says no that he doesn't want to scare her away, yet it is okay to talk about it with me??? I don't know if he's mixed up and doesn't know what he wants or what, but really, is that normal to be serious about doing it with your friend and talking about it while you have a girlfriend that you refuse to let go of?

I dont think thats normal. He's not exactly being truthful to his girlfriend. If hes serious about it with you, why is he still with her, you know? Let me ask you something, could it be that his gf doesnt want to have sex and he knows you might want to, and could that be the reason hes always talking to you about it? Guys are horny throughout their teens (which im sure you know) and i think hes getting caught up in hormones. Next time he brings it up, tell him not to talk about having sex with you until hes through with his gf (if having sex is what you want.) But, is sex all he wants from you? There are some things to think about there, but i hope i helped out
-melissa

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