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about
I'm Jack/Jamie.I'm 28 years old. I graduated from Michigan State University with my Bachelor of Science in Chemistry. GO GREEN! Now I'm a high school chemistry teacher in New York City living with my husband in a small studio apartment we pay way too much money for.
I've been on this site for 14 years as of March 23, 2020.
You may have seen me as CuxMiBeckNow7, but I've since shortened my name.
my forum
My FAQ
Here is my Recommended Columnist of the Decade for the 2020s:
Laura!
--Jack
advice
So I'm 16/f and I absolutely love to take pictures and videos, whether they're about people, animal, buildings, statues, art, nature, etc. I love to take pictures...
The camera I have, I received as a birthday present the summer after 7th grade (I think) and it was a really expensive one (around $375!). But since then, it's seen so much more better days. Right now, the cap that holds the camera battery in is broken so it's held inside by a rubber band, the exterior is all scratched up, and the mode dial is loose and won't let me get to the "User Setting Menu" and 3 or 4 other modes. When I take videos and play them back, all I can hear is a tiny volume of the actual sound part and this obnoxious "tap tap tap" sound.
I know I should've taken a lot better care of it. My mom's lecturing me about how I don't respect anything & that she's reluctant to get me a new one (but she agreed to). I still haven't had my 16th birthday yet (like, I turned 16 on 7/9 but no cake, no gifts, no candles, no singing, no anything) so I was hoping that a new camera would be my 16th birthday present and that's all I would want (plus a soccer ball). But my mom said that if she gets me one now I won't get another except if I pay it with my own money in the future (which isn't going to happen because I rarely get money from my parents and I absolutely have no time to work because during school I barely have time to sleep and during the summer I have to spend a majority of my time doing volunteer work to get an IB diploma).
So should I ask for a new camera for my 16th birthday gift or get a new computer + new camera as my college gift?
Thanks & I know I rambled...a lot.
I say get the new camera now because you said you love taking pictures, and by the time you've graduated, you'll have missed out on a lot of memories either not having a camera or having a broken one.
Here's one I suggest, though I'm sure there's higher quality.
I am going to tell you about my wonderful camera I got two Christmases ago.
It does everything you want:
-Takes pictures
-Takes videos
-Has many different picture settings
-I have rechargeable batteries.. they were kind of on the pricey side, but they are definitely worth it.. you don't have to go out and buy new batteries every time they die.
-It is in your price range. You won't get too great of quality for under $150, so its good you have a larger range. But.. at the bottom of the page I give below- it has a certain website where it looks like you can find it at $119.99. That would probably be your best bet.
Here is a review of it that I found: www.imaging-resource.com/PRODS/A530/A530A.HTM
This camera has 5.0 megapixels, 4X Optical Zoom [You want optical zoom, not digital zoom- because digital screws up the pixels as you zoom and the picture looks really crappy], it has 18 different shooting modes, and if you have a larger memory card [I have 2GB] you can hold a lot of pictures/videos.
Now for my own review..
I love this camera a lot and it is a great investment. I take tons of pictures and videos.. and it is perfect for me. The picture quality is the best I've seen in many different digital cameras. My brother has one, and the pictures always come out having odd white spots on them. This camera doesn't do that, ever. I think you will love it.
The website I gave you can get a good discount =D.
--Jack
(16/m)
this is kind of embarrasing haha but some of my friends shave their vaginas, and im too afriad to ask them details about it.
like how much do you shave/how often or are you even supposed to? and just basic like facts about it haha
so does anyone have any answers?
A lot of girls shave it all off, but some only shave so it is not so bushy.
You can shave as often or as little as you like.
It's really all personal preference, and every girl is different.
--Jack
(16/m)
i get like 10 or 11 hours of sleep in the night and then the next day i'm always sleepy and tired the whole entire day for some reason.
how do i stop being sleepy and tired all the time????
Like the person below said, if you're getting too much sleep, that can often make you even more tired.
Really, getting at least 7 hours of sleep is good, that is, if you take a 20-30 minute nap during the day.
So like I do, if you go out somewhere in the morning and get back around like 3 or 4 in the afternoon, take a nap when you get home for 20-30 minutes and set some sort of alarm, and then wake up. If you nap for like 40-60 minutes, it kind of defeats the purpose. A shorter nap is like a power nap, and I promise you'll feel really good after you wake up from it. I always like to wake up and get a big glass of water to wake me up, too ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
What are some good tips for making out? It's my first time and this guy wants to hook up with me. If you're going to answer this question with 'it will be natural' or something like that then..don't answer please. I really need tips and advice..thanks.
I know this sounds really lame, and I'm sure it is ;]
But just go with the flow. I don't really have experience in how to "properly" kiss, nor do I have experience with kissing at all! Can you say prude? ;]
Anyway- if it's your boyfriend/girlfriend- just be honest with him/her. Tell them you're nervous and you don't really know what you're doing. Apparently the people who are less-experienced is a big turn-on to some people.
Do what you feel comfortable with. If something feels awkward or uncomfortable, don't do it. If it feels right, ask the person if they are okay with that, and if they are- then you'll be fine.
There really isn't a CORRECT way to do it. Everyone does what they are comfortable with.
From my weak experience- this is what I can tell you:
1. Don't come on strong- it's really awkward for the other person.
2. Don't slobber all over the other person.
3. Don't stick your tongue all the way down their throat.
My friend on here, Laura, answered a question similar to this, and she gave a great answer. I will copy her answer, but know that credit goes to her.
www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=542699
Honestly, you could read a book about it, and you'd probably forget everything once you went in for the kiss.
Explore. Do what feels right. Make it fun, playful, romantic, whatever you want it to be. Don't make it all about jamming your tongue down his throat, and try not to drool all over him, because it's generally less than desireable to do so.
If you come off as confident it'll be a lot more fun. If all evening you're thinking "Oh my gosh, this is going to be bad" you won't enjoy yourself. Follow his lead at first, if you're truly that nervous.
And really, it's almost impossible to find a truly bad kisser. If anything, they might do something you're not used to; give it a chance before you hate it. Who knows, he might be thinking the same thing right now about you!
Over time, you'll develop your own personal style of kissing/making out, and that's not a bad thing. Do whatever feels good/right to you, and gets a positive reaction. For example, some people love a gentle, or less than gentle, bite of the lip, "necking", and other techniques. Like I already said, experiment & make it fun!
From personal experience I'd advise that you brush your teeth and floss, and have some mild mints with you, like TicTacs. Fruity is usually good, and less overpowering. If you're at a party, don't worry too much about what you're eating if you're both eating the same things, but a huge plate of hummus & extra garlic is a bad choice right before kissing =P. That's where mints come in handy for both of you. Casually offer him one if he's been gorging on something stinky.
--Jack
(16/m)
ok, so im 15/f and im struggling with acne. Its been not so bad but now its getting worse and worse every day. Any advice on getting it to stop?
Oh, and no its not because of my period. haha.
thanks !
=]
Hey. I know this sounds weird, odd, strange, etc., but what I'm about to say to you ACTUALLY works:
Get some lemon juice. You got the lemon juice? Alright- now take the lemon juice- and take a Q-tip and dab some lemon juice onto your zit with the lemon juice. Just a thin layer- not the whole bottle, silly! =D
Alright- so doing this at night is the best thing to do- it will really reduce the size and shape of the zit- and you won't know it was there in a few days.
Make sure not to touch it with your fingers after you put on the lemon juice- the oils from your fingers will stop the effect.
Relax- everyone gets zits- so you're only normal =D.
And here's a forum discussion from one of my friends on here that talks a lot about acne:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutmetopic.php?t=368&userboard_id=35415
From there:
Acne pretty much sucks ass and we all hate them.
I'll pretty much share what I know and my experiences.
So, I used to have really bad acne for like 2 freaking years. It sucked and I hated it. But now I'm better and here are my views on stuff:
Dermatologists are hard to get an appointment with and very pricey. They don't do much except look at you once, then they have their assistants take care of you after the dermatologist her/himself prescribes you acne medicine. It's usually Differin [sp?] and Benzaclin [sp?].
OTC Medicine:
Not all medication work effectively on all people. I've learn that it doesn't work for me or for anyone with sensitive skin. It may work for some people but as soon as they stop the use, acne comes back. Whether it's a cream, gel, or oral medication, they all suck! They dry out your skin, irritate it, increase sunburns/tans, and enlarge your pores. Not your dream skin, huh? And ironically, they sometimes make it worse. And you know what the 'best' part is? They're freakishly expensive! And once you stop the medication, acne comes back and parties like there's not tomorrow. Oral medication also makes your insides bad =/
Acne Products:
Acne face wash, gel, cream, whatever. Proactive seems to be a big one, too. Anywhos, as I've mentioned above, some work for some people while it makes everything worse for other people. It all depends. But most of the time, all those products dry your skin out, irritate it, and/or makes your acne worse. And it enlarges your pores too. Again, not very dreamy. And if they do work, as soon as you stop using them, they come back. Same line second verse.
So what the hell are you suppose to do?
Go the natural, cheap way.
Washing your face:
Wash your face gently only twice a day. Once is okay, I guess. But washing your face when you get up and before you go to bed is a good idea. More than twice a day could irritate your skin. Also, do not scrub your face, wash it gently as if you were washing a baby. Use face friendly products, too. I recommend a brand called Cetaphile. It's gentle on your skin and softens it. PAT your face dry with a clean towel.
Towels and pillow cases:
Try and change them as much as you can. Every day would be PERFECT but hard to do sometimes.
Squeezing:
Not only does that sound disgusting, it is. And it leaves nasty scars. Don't touch your face at all unless you have a slight itch. Don't rest your chin/cheeks in your hands or your arm. Just leave it alone as if it was a $10,000,000 mask that if you touch, you'll get arrested for. Oh, and try to keep your hair out of your face.
Sleeping:
Sleeping plays a big, huge role. Your body starts to renew its skin starting around 10PM and ending around 2AM. So be sure to be sleeping somewhere in between or the entire time. Sleeping early helps, and getting adequate sleep improves your skin and its tone.
Eating:
Milk makes acne worse. It's scientifically proven. Junk foods, sweet, sugars. ALL BAD FOR YOU PERIOD. Avoid/limit them along with sodas even if they're diet. Sports drink contain loads of sugar. Juices, too. Instead, eat healthy foods like veggies and fruits! I've noticed that my skin improve immensely when I turned vegetarian. So maybe give a shot to eating lots of veggies and fruits and other healthy stuff and cut down on meat? Also try and drink green tea [tea bag with no added sugar] or green tea with aloe [again, tea bag with no added sugar].
Masks:
Home made masks are probably the best. Here are few that work and softens your skin:
1. Red ginseng syrupy liquid thing mixed with warm water and a bit of all purpose flour. Make a mask thing with that.
2. Green tea [tea bag] cooled down to room temperature. Splash it on your face for 5min or so. I know it sounds weird but it helps. Or mix it with a little bit of all purpose flour and make a mask.
3. Mix warm milk, honey, and all purpose flour. Make a mask with that.
Only do the mask right after you washed your face. Make sure you don't put on any lotion and what not. Do not leave it on for more than 10-15min because bacteria will become attracted to the mask. Do not laugh, squint, whatever. Just keep your face neutral or you'll get wrinklies. Do not peel the mask off. Slowly wash it off GENTLY with LUKEWARM water. Keyword: GENTLY.
Lotions and make ups and what not:
Lotions/Sunblocks have products that won't clog pores, are fragrance and oil free. I suggest you buy from either Neutrogena or...some other renown company. I use Neutrogena's Oil Free Moisturizing Face Lotion and Neutrogena's Oil Free 55 SPF Sunblock. And Aveeno's 50 SPF Sunblcok [oil free] sometimes.
Make up should be limited to only eye and lip make up. No foundation, no concealer, not blush, no powder. Get my drift? Good. If you MUST wear make up, limit it down to special occasions [School does NOT count] and take it off as soon as you can. Whatever you do, do NOT go to bed with make up on!
--Jack
(16/m)
Okay, I know this may sound stupid.
But is it possible for a guy to pee while he's releasing sperm?
Like basicly peeing in you?
Just wondering.
It's not possible, but after the sperm is out, he definitely could, whether he has an erection or not.
--Jack
(16/m)
Okay! I have been going out with this guy for about 8 months now and he lives In New york..and i live In Michigan. And he ALWAYS talks to me about Other girls. Also when he is with his friends or on Xbox live he doesnt talk to me. Then yells at me when i say "Can i call you back?." And i've thought about breaking up with him, but my heart wont let me. I do love him, But i just dont know what to do. Can someone help?
If he isn't making an effort to talk to you, and you've addressed this with him, and he continues with what he does, well then I would say break up with him.
Long-distance relationships can work, and I've seen plenty work, but then again I've seen plenty NOT work. If it isn't working out, don't feel bad about ending it.
I know you may love him, but there are plenty of other guys out there who won't do what this guy is doing to you.
--Jack
(16/m)
16/f
I like my friend, Jake. He and I have had a "thing" once before, but it was about a year ago. I'm not sure if he likes me back. Sometimes I get signals that he might, but I'm not sure. Can you tell me what would be some "signals" that would point to one direction or the other (that he could like me, or that he couldn't).
How could I let him know that I quite possibly could like him without telling him straight up.
I don't know if this is enough information for you to answer my question, but I hope it is. Thanks. =)
I'm going to give you a list of what guys tend to do when they like girls:
1. They don't call you "sexy". They call you "beautiful", "gorgeous", "amazing", etc.
2. They make an effort to hug you. They might high-5 instead, but it really depends on the guy in question.
3. They DO find any reason to touch you in some way. Mostly it ISN'T in a sexual way. Its more of just an excuse to remember what you feel like, I guess. Its hard to explain...
4. He is always smiling around you. If you're feeling bad and he's around- he'll be smiling because he knows that he's there to help you- and that's like brownie points for a guy if they can help a girl out. That, like the above, is hard to explain.
5. He'll tell you things about himself that he normally wouldn't tell everyone. He opens up to you. Guys don't get a chance to do that when pressured to "be manly".
6. If you have a feeling that a guy likes you- you're probably right. Guys aren't the best at hiding it- and girls are even better at figuring these type of things out.
If you like this guy- and he does all or most of those things- my best bet is that he does like you. That means one and only one thing: Ask him to make sure, and then try the relationship out. Who knows- it could be great! I know you said that it might ruin your friendship, and I've been in this situation many times, and it ruined the friendship, but I've also been in this situation where the friendship didn't get ruined.
If you don't try, you'll never know how it could be.
Here's some advice my friend Laura would offer you:
http://www.advicenators.com/qview.php?q=543173
From there:
Well, there are 2 major options you can go about to solve this problem:
1. Be blunt about it.
2. Be shy about it.
I highly suggest being blunt about it, and either asking him if he's into you too, or simply asking him out yourself. Guys like when girls show confidence, and there's no better way to show you're confident than walking up to a guy and asking him out!
Or, you can go the other route and be shy about it, possibly doing nothing to show him you're interested in him. Sometimes, people who use this method drop subtle hints such as smiling [which is common in girls and doesn't always show you're into a guy] or having a friend ask if he's into you [this only shows that you're too shy to do it yourself]. This option is really kind of stupid, and is used all too much...
As I always say:
Life is WAY too short to not take chances and risks once in a while. Why sit around wondering what could've been, what would've been and what should've been, when you can answer all of those questions and then some by being honest and telling a boy how you really feel about him?
--Jack
(16/m)
ok so i want a new screen name.
and i want it with the word:
brokenn
..yes,with two n's.
please help x)
Brokenn Heart
Brokenn Dreams
Brokenn Wings
Brokenn Hopes
Brokenn Bones
And you can add your graduation year, your age, your favorite number, or any other significant numbers to the end ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
what would a 13 year old guy look for in a 13 year old girl? my friend(who is a girl and im a guy) asked me what does a guy look for in a girl and im not completely sure what i look for
so some point of views from 13 year old guys or older would be helpful but i dont care whio answers this question
Guys like girls who are confident in themselves.
Guys like girls who are individuals without being too weird.
Guys like girls who are smart.
Guys like girls who are well-rounded.
Guys like girls who are willing to carry on a conversation.
Basically it differs for every guy, but generally, that's what guys think.
--Jack
(16/m)
Sorry for the topic, I didn't know what to put.
Anyway, Say someone ate a meal then puked up a mouthful of food. However, They didn't stick there finger down thier throat.. and they did it occassionally. Would you say that person had a problem?
Whether they are making themselves vomit or not, there is definitely a problem. They could be bulimic, or they could just have the stomach flu, but usually the flu doesn't last for more than a few weeks, so if it's been going on for more than that, the person probably has a problem.
--Jack
(16/m)
Heyah I am a 13 year old girl from Ireland. I was talking on the phone to my crush. He asked me to phone him so I did and when i did he didnt talk much. When we where sayin goodbye he said I have to go now see you later sexy. I don't know if he was being serious because he was with his friend. But he doesnt seem like that type of person. He did hang up really quickly. Any Advice?
Generally when a guy says that at your age, it's a joke and he's just showing off. Then again, we can't read his mind. So if you wanted to know, ask him, but I'm sure it isn't anything too serious. Friends often call each other sexy just for fun. If he liked you, he would have said "beautiful" or "gorgeous", not "sexy".
--Jack
(16/m)
im from sudan in africa ...ok i don't know what to do ...my boyfriend and i had sex on july 14 weekend and my period it suppost to come on aug 4 and these days im feeling more sleepy and have lower backach...am i gonna have a baby???:(
Like Laura said- since your period isn't supposed to come until August 4th, then wait until then to worry.
But the more you stress out, the longer it will be until your period comes. Just relax.
And also, please be safe next time.
--Jack
(16/m)
So you think its fine to shave your pubic hair off? Because Im a little freaked out that guys will get weirded out by it...Do they?
I'm not sexually active, but if you want to shave it, shave it. If guys have an issue with that, well then maybe they aren't the right guy to be with. The guy to be with will appreciate you whether you shave down there or not.
--Jack
(16/m)
I have been babysitting my sisters baby for about 3 months now, for free. How do I ask my sister to start paying me???
from,
Money maker
Just flat out ask her. Yes, she is your family, but if after 3 months she hasn't started paying you, she's extorting you for money.
You don't have to be payed the same as if you were babysitting someone outside of family, but at least ask for a reasonable rate.
If your sister doesn't start paying you, tell her that if you leave, she'll have to start paying someone probably a lot more than what she would have to pay you, since you're family.
If any of that made sense, that's a good thing ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
next year i want to apply to my National Honors Society in my school, however one of the criteria is to have some experience in LEADING, but i dont have any remarkable leadership positions.
what kinds of things can i do that have a leadership role? (and dont say join a club..because in order to be voted as a pres or VP, i need to have been in a club for at least a year. and i havent.)
ty in advance
Next year as in this coming year?
Hmm if that's the case, there isn't much time you have left.
Maybe try organizing a huge service project for your community, like cleaning up a mile of road or gathering food for the homeless or something. Really any service project that YOU coordinate that involves a lot of people will probably impress those who read applications ;]
--Jack
(16/m)
My sister and I used to be close back when we were kids, but now...well...I try to do stuff with her, like go out on Saturday nights, but she always says, "I hate you!" and she's been saying this for years. I mean, not out of the blue, but...sometimes I'm just so sad that I want to break down and cry, and sometimes I do.
She's 18 and I'm thirteen, and this all started when I was eleven. I have no clue what I've done wrong to upset her! She's like this to only ME! To everyone else, she's a sweety pie.
Last year was her last year of highschool, and when she left for college, she didnt even say "goodbye" to me or hug me, she just hugged my parents goodbye and drove off, ignoring me. Whenever she comes home with her boyfriends to meet us or visit, she doesn't talk to me. I try really, really hard to make her accept me. And whenvever I ask my mom for help, she just says, "Oh, all sisters fight!" But this has gone on forever!
I'm so depressed. I don't understand why all my friends who fought with their sisters long ago are now like, BFFs with them, while me and my sister aren't.
I'm so sorry. My siblings and I used to fight all the time, but we're totally good now. I guess it helps that my brother is 19, my sister is 18 and I'm almost 17.
I know you've tried being nice, but have you tried TALKING to her? Like actually talking to her about how she makes you feel? I know it may seem awkward, but I would call her or something, and just ease into that.
Maybe she honestly doesn't know how she's making you feel. So letting her know might make her stop.
If not, I'm almost confident that it will get better as you grow up. There's a 5 year difference, which may contribute to the tension.
--Jack
(16/m)
i love to sing
i sing i front of my music teacher every friday with a cd and he wants me to sing with out the cd and i dont know how with out the insturmental of the music. even if i did i dont think i can do it i front of my music teacher can u help
Listen to the CD over and over, and you'll eventually start to get the music in your head. Then eventually start singing it without the CD and see how you do.
If by the time he wants you to, and you feel you can't, let him know. Ask him if he could find the music and play it for you on the piano or something.
Don't be embarrassed to sing in front of your teacher. I've been in your position for my school's musical auditions, and I was so nervous to sing in front of my director and the music teacher. But it went fine. Just imagine they're not there. That's what I did.
Relax and you'll do fine =].
--Jack
(16/m)
I'm fourteen and just finished 9th grade. I go to a religious school one night a week that includes kids from grades 8-12. As a member of the student council, I met a certain 12th-grade boy (well, college now, barely) and we became friends. He, however, seems to want to be more than that. He often seems like he's trying to flirt with me and he keeps asking if I want to "hang out." The only sort of hanging out he ever seems to come up with is moviegoing, which sounds way to close to a date for my comfort. I'm quite willing to be friends with him but I absolutely don't want to date him. How do I send him the message that I don't want to go out with him when he hasn't actually asked me out, exactly? I'm quite sure that he likes me, so I hate just saying no because I know how he must feel. If he said, "do you want to go out with me?" I could use the let's-just-be-friends trick, but he hasn't so I'm very confused about how to let him know that our friendship stops there. Any suggestions?
Riddle me this: How will he know you only want to be friends if you don't tell him. He can't read your mind, unfortunately.
Yes, I know it will hurt him, and I've been in his position. But isn't it better that you stop him now rather than stop him later when things get really involved? He'll be ten times more hurt if you stop him later than now.
So just talk to him about it. Really that's all you can do.
--Jack
(16/m)
My bf is 16 and im 15 weve been together for almost 7 months we kiss and stuff and nothing else hes a bit shy he doesnt want to do much else i dont push him into anything but recently ive asked him about it and he finally opened up a little he said that he has a small penis and he emabrrassed about it i told him i love him and size doesnt matter that much and last week he showed me his penis it is small ive tried to reassure him what else can i do? what the average size?
Keep supporting him and letting him know that size is something you can't control unless you get surgery.
The average size is like 6 inches, I think, but that's erect.
I've had so many girls tell me size doesn't matter. Not that I'm sexually active; I mean like older girls who are married. Not that I asked either. Okay, I'm done.
--Jack
(16/m)