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Q: Ok. So my friend who is 14 like me, basically makes out with a different guy every night and gives head to a new guy every week. She recently lost her virginity at a party, and when we started talking about all the stuff she does she says she has fun but she looked really sad. Personally I think she's been doing way to much stuff with way too many random guys. I don't want to hurt her, and make her think I think she's a slut or anything, but I do want to talk to her because I'm concerned. What do I do?

Okay, if she's 14, she's way too young to be doing that kind of stuff anyway.
Talk to her about it. Just be gentle, and start with something like "Hey, [friend's name], I wanna talk to you about something that's concerning me..." and then gently go into the problem. Good luck!
-Siren

Q: hey this is kristi...k well ricky called me last nite.. should i call him tonite... or should i wait til he calls me or wait a day or so to call him.. ?
luv kristi

I suggest you wait a day. That way it doesn't seem like you're aching to hear his voice. It also doesn't seem like you're "waiting the right amount of time." Give it a day, chill awhile, then call him. Good luck! ^_^
-Siren

Q: Okay I really don't know how great of a question this is...or whatever...but I just really need help...

You see...I have social anxiety disorder...this thing is so hard to live with it's not even funny...that's just PART OF my problem...

I have been in love with someone named Orlando for about a year...but he doesn't know who I am and I'm completely sure it was/is love. Well, recently I found out he had a girlfriend and it broke my heart...

But...the thing is...I don't dwell on it as much as I thought I would...I still really like Orlando...more then I've ever liked any other guy before...but my LOVE for him is actually starting to slowly die down for him and I'm slowly starting to let him go...

Well...there is this boy...lets call him "EBO"...well... in 6th grade I knew Ebo and I never actually TALKED to him in person becuase of my social anxiety disorder...but i went to the movies with him adn some of my other friends often...well he was always really nice but I never really liked him or anything...

But...the summer AFTER 6th grade I tranferred schools and now Im going to high school in 3 months and I talked to Ebo a few times online and we had a long talk and we never opened up to each other that much and he said "I wish I could hug you" and "if you feel you need to say something I'm listening" and then about a month and a half later he just randomly said he missed me and about a month before he said he missed me is when I realized I really liked Ebo...I mean the boy is so sweet and caring.

When he said these kind of things (and they may not seem like a big deal) but it came as a shock to me and it made me get butterflies and it just came as a surprise because when I knew him he was never one to just come out and say things like that...and I really like him but as I was saying before I have social anxiety disorder...and I never spoke to him in personm before and I only talk to him online and I havent seen him for a year and supposedly he's changed a lot with his looks... (looks dont matter to mjeO but now a lot of girls want him and I'm just scared because he would probably think Im weird if I told him I liked him and I know he's not worth it if he thinks Im weird and he would never say anything mean to me (i know that for a fact) but Im just scared it would make things awkward and if I DID tell him we would never be able to go out with him because I probably wouldn't talk to him at all and I can't help that...and omg I really liek this kid what do I do??

If you tell him you like him, you're already talking, you realize. =)
If you really like this kid, you have to open up and talk to him. I know that's hard because of your SAD, but you have to try. He missed you, and he was ready to hear you say you liked him. That's what the "if you feel you need to say something..." implies.
Go for it. It might not make things awkward. Good luck!
-Siren

Q: My friend wants to know what to say to get a boy horny? lol...i dont know what to do any advice??

It's usually not so much WHAT you say as it's how you say it. If she talks to him in a flirty tone of voice and hints at little things, it'll turn him on. Guys are REALLY easy to turn on. Lol. Good luck to her!
-Siren =)

Q: i have a friend
and she goes out wit him, but she needs some good topics like what to talk about with him cuz they like know everything about each other already....
SO WHAT R SOME GOOD QUESTIONS 4 HER 2 ASK HIM ABOUT 2 KEEP A LONG CONVERATION GOING ON????

Hmm...
A good standby is always childhood. Does she know a lot about his childhood? My boy and I ended up talking for two hours about our childhoods. What's he planning to do after school and how's he gonna do it? There are tons of topics! Good luck to her! =)
-Siren

Q: this is kristi.. i wrote about ricky awhile ago... well i wrote him a letter and gave it to him on the last day of skool.. i know kinda lame but hey at least i gave it to him. well it said that i liked him and that we should hang out this summer then i put my number at the bottom... well he called me THAT NIGHT. we talked bout everything BUT the letter, but we found out that were going to hawaii... same island and everything at the same time so we r gonna meet up there to hang out.. how perfect huh? well does that mean anything that he called me that nite when i said call me this SUMMER?
luv kristi

Wow, sounds great. Take me with you...
Lol - joking. That's cool that he called you that night. That implies that he wants to hang out and has some interest in you. Good luck with him, and have fun in Hawaii!
-Siren

Q: ok ive never really been into the whole pop thing although i dress liek the ones who do so when people ask me what kinda music i listen to i tell them and they get these wierd looks and are like u dont see like the rocker type ill admit i am kinda of a blonde at heart but why do they asume that im stuid and a pop freak cause im a littel stupid with common sence and with the cloths i ware

I know what you mean. Teenagers are stupid. I include myself in that. They generally assume that since someone is a teenager, they must like pop, and rock, and all that stuff.
I mean, I sing opera, but I listen to hard rock and stuff like that. When people ask me what kinds of music I like, and I say that I like...evanescence, or something, they're all shocked.
Blame it on stupidity. That's their reason. =)
-Siren

Q: what does cosmatic mean. Not cosmetic, cosmatic. It would be really helpful if someone told me.

I have no idea. I'm not sure that's a word...Sorry I couldn't be more helpful!
-Siren

Q: I don't know how this is possible, a while ago, i was crazy for pinapples. I'm still in a while ago though, so i'm still addicted. A cop caught me for eating and driving with pineapples and he recommended me to go to pineapple rehab, i don't know why he said that, is there really a pineapple rehabilitation center.
Piney Woman

Somehow, I doubt there's really a rehab center for pinapple addicts...
-Siren

Q: Well I broke up with my ex because I thought He didnt love me anymore and now I really want him back but when i ask him about us its always I dont know but he did tell me he still loves me, he thought i broke up with him for someone else so when he tells me he doesnt know is he hurt by us being over or does he not want me anymore? help plz!!

Aha. This is a perfect example of major miscommunication.
You shouldn't be asking us if he's hurt or doesn't want you anymore; you should be asking him! It sounds like he's testing you, trying to see how much you really want him back. Tell him that you realize you made a huge mistake, and ask him what's really going on. You should get your answers. Good luck!
-Siren

Q: well, i have had my period but it's late. like a week and a half late, what should i do and why is this happening?

If you're not having sex, then you shouldn't worry. If you're young, it's perfectly normal for your period to come late. Hell, I'm 16 and mine's still not regulated itself. Comes between 23 and 32 days. Lol. It takes years for your period to regulate itself, unless you go on the pill, or something, which is supposed to regulate your cycle. Stress, or weight loss could also delay your period. Don't worry about it.
-Siren

Q: ok im bisex and so is my girl/f ((ima girl)) and we were at the movies and when ppl ask if were together we always say yes well this guy asked us if we were bi or sumpin and i was bout to say yes and shes like ha no this is just my friend and she sat by him and made out wit him and i dont no what to do!!

Tell her you were really hurt by what she said and did. Maybe ask her why. If I were in your shoes, I'd be curious as hell to know why she lied and cheated on me in, like, the same instant because that's just not cool. Talk to her. I hope this helps!
-Siren=)

Q: i like haven sex wit kids is that bad?!? liek 10 to 13 year olds and im 60

Dude, you sound like a kid. You probably are. Don't bother us with useless randomness.
-Siren

Q: what do u do when ur best/f wants to kill herself and u cant do anything about it bc u dont live any where near her any more?

Call her every day, send her letters. Beg your parents to take you to see her. If she's seriously contemplating suicide, you've gotta tell someone. That's serious stuff, and suicide is bad. I suggest you tell your parents. I hope stuff goes well!
-Siren=)

Q: i can't kiss my boyfriend. i said i wanted to and he said he wanted to and we do but we're both too shy. what do i do????

Awwww!
Sorry, it's cute...Just wait for the right moment. On an impulse, kiss him before you can convince yourself otherwise. I had the problem where I was just too shy to kiss my guy, but he had no problem kissing me. Just kiss him on the cheek...he'll get the idea. Lips don't have to come into the picture for awhile! Good luck!
-Siren

Q: about a week ago i was talking to this guy on the internet and he was asking me who i liked and i was like idk who do you like and he gave me all these clues that lead up to me then told me that it was me and then i told him that i like him. he is cute and makes me laugh (which i like) but on monday he went on this trip and my best friends bf waS there to. so of course they talked on the phone everynight then one day she told me that while they were talking he asked for my phone # but he hasn't called me yet, should i call him or just forget about him??? im am really confused (14)

Oh, my god. You're kidding me. My fifth boyfriend did that to me...the whole clues leading up to you thing...and you're the age I was when that happened...Freaky.
Sorry. Anyway...I would give him a call and just chat for awhile. Good luck in life and love!
-Siren=)

Q: well, he use to be my boyfriend but we broke up, even through that theres still that little something. and we ocacsionally end up hooking up. i like him as a person and everything but now it jsut seems that its growing more of a friendship. supposely he likes me, but then again he doesnt want a commitment. my friends think i should maybe find someoen new. i dont want to leadd him no at all. and i like him and everything but part of me thins it's a different like. but neways. i met this guy who i played soccer but neevr really noticed, well i thought he was good looking but didnt know he noticed me . but he did and he wants to hang out. i really need someone new. but i dont know what to do now? should i go? or should i still hook up with my ex? im' 15.

I always say that when a relationship ends, it's over, and you should never look back. It's like trying to change the past, which everyone knows is impossible.
There's a reason that relationship ended. Do you really want to go back to it? Plus, guys that don't want commitment are probably bad news. You might get attached to him, and he just wants to be "friends with benefits," which is essentially an excuse to cheat. How rotten would that feel?
If this new guy likes you and you like him, go for it.
It's really up to you in the end, but I say keep moving on. Good luck!
-Siren =)

Q: Ok, I'm kinda in love with this guy who was a senior in my school but as the year went by and we grew closer we became friends and now we're in love(he loves me too and we're kinda going out) but now he has graduated and is going to college in August, and I have no idea what I'm going to do without him. HELP!!!

If you both feel that you could stay true to each other in a long distance relationship, go for it. But think about it. If you don't want to be tied down to a guy you might never see much, I'd break up with him. If you two are really meant to be together after all that you'll end up back together.
But I'm all for positives, so talk to him and figure out if you two really want to do the whole long-distance relationship thing. Hey, it works for some people.
Good luck!
-Siren

Q: i got this girl pregnant a while ago

she said that she would keep it if i take care of it otherwise shes going to get an abortion

dont know what to do

Alright.
Since you're both very young, I would really let her get an abortion. I hear childbirth is extremely painful, and I mean...I wouldn't want to go through that at 12. Her body is most likely not really ready to have a baby, and when that's the case, it's very, very risky to go through with it.
She'd keep it if you would take care of it? I wouldn't accept that. One person should never have to raise a child.
In any case, you both need to talk to your parents - I would advise you do this together so it's easier for you two. But first talk to this girl, and ask her what she wants to do.
Remember, it takes a lot of money to pay for kids nowadays. You both still have your whole lives ahead of you. Don't inhibit yourselves with a child. I don't mean to sound harsh, but really. Think it over. It would be a lot of stress for both of you, and school's stressful enough.
Talk to the girl, talk to the parents, and make your decisions. It is up to her in the end, but you need to take the time to think it through. Good luck. You two are gonna need it. If you want more help, feel free to contact me.
-Siren

Q: Ok so i have this friend ( jeff) who i just like as a friend and only as a friend and its likewise with him. but anyways
In my dream i see me and him dating, and looks like we are really really happy. And it looks like me and him are like celebrating like our anniversity and all that. well half way thur the dinner or w/e this girl name Kathy pops up and shes all over jeff....and jeff keeps pushing her away and then i get tired of watching so i'm all Biotch move he's my man. and then all of sudden me and her are fighting over him in a mid ring, and jeff is just sitting there watching. and just about before he comes in to stop the fight i wake up.

someone told me that if you dream mud its a bad thing.

can you help me figure out the meaning of the dream.

*Cracks knuckles* This is one of my specialties. ^_^
Lessee. Well, mud isn't necessarily a bad thing. It just means that there's a lack of clarity.
I think in this case it's telling you that something's gonna happen that will compromise your friendship, and though it'll be unclear exactly what's going on, you'll try - possibly unsuccessfully - to fix it, and he'll step in at the last minute.
That's just a quick analyzation, but I hope it helps!

bio

I'm a laid-back 26 year old with a Psychology BA, starting my MA program, and working my way into the field as quickly as I can. It took me an extra Bachelor's degree (in vocal performance and creative writing) to figure it out, but I was put on this Earth to help, to heal, and to love.

I have made the decision to dedicate my life and career to helping others. I am here to do just that.

I've been a member since 2004, and since I signed up, I've gone through quite a lot and learned quite a lot from it. I'm here to give guidance where I had none; no one should have to go through the difficulties I went through alone.

Feel free to visit my website/blog, if you want to read my experience with domestic violence and my thoughts on it.

***While I do tend to answer mental health and other health-related or medicine-related questions, I am by NO MEANS a licensed physician or practitioner of any sort. Any and all advice I give for these questions is from my own experience or studies.***

If you need to get a hold of me quickly, my screen name on AIM is SirenCytherea. Just let me know you found me here.

I'm a strong believer in the idea that there are no stupid questions except the ones left unasked, so, please, keep an open mind, heart, and mouth.

Siren