Member Since: May 3, 2011
Answers: 1053
Last Update: December 12, 2012
Visitors: 30808
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I'm 14 to start off .
Okay , so My dad has been acting stranger towards me , ever since he found out I had a boyfriend which was like 1 year ago .(I don't have a boyfriend anymore cause I realize I need to focuse in life more) But anyways That changed him ? /: I don't know how . But it did ... I don't understand . He started treating me differently ... If I asked for something he tells me "your old enough , get it yourself" and me and him rarely even speak now. He comes back from work at night and he doesn't really talk to me . He gets mad at me for every single LITTLE thing ! When I wanna tell him something good ' he ignores me .. :( or he just says "that's great , but when are you going to clean this house or help your mom" . I ask him for money for some shoes for school and he says no but my older brother (the best one in the family) asks him an he says yes . He always listens to him more and probably because my brother is successful in everything . And my dad just looks at me like "what are you going to do with your life" like as if I'm not trying /: I spend my time locked in my room the whole time cause I like thinking and planning my life .when my dad comes back from work he always says "why can't you do anything around here than just be in your room texting and getting on Facebook" That's not even true , I'm trying ! I'm thinking on how I can be good enough for someone ! Look just cause parents think they have a hard life trying to work , raise a family , put food on the table , get us everything we need , try to pay everything , doesn't mean our life's arent hard ! I'm not saying my life is the worstest but it still is something . I'm here struggling to be the best to make my parents proud ! Planning my life ! Trying at school ! Trying for my own needs ! I'm trying ! Too ! Just cause my parents didn't finish school They don't know how hard it is ! And then having to deal with ignorant people at school ! My parents don't even listen to me. When we argue and I tell them how i feel . They say im stupid /: Well I'm sorry that my feelings are something stupid . Sorry I'm only human... (link)
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First, step back and relax. This isn't your fault. Sometimes, people are just wacked out of their minds and, unfortunately, some of those people are parents.
This is a weird twist on the Oedipus complex on your father's part. Either that or you getting to be old enough to date has made him feel old and he resents it. Whatever the case, it's all in his head. So don't take it personally. Just start treating the nonsensical stuff he says with all the credibility that such stuff deserves: none.
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I read that if the only drink you have is water for a week, you could lose weight. Because it helps release the water weight your body holds onto when you drink sugary drinks. I don't know if I believe this. I may not even be understanding it correctly. If you've heard of this or did it, could you tell me about it. How does it work? What exactly does it do? Thanks. (link)
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The water diet is just another fad diet with no science to back it up. The only way to lose weight is to burn up more calories than you take in. I'm on a 1500 calories a day diet and I've lost 50 pounds thus far. The only thing drinking large quantities of water will do is make you urinate more often.
Mind you, water is better, for a whole raft of reasons, than soft drinks which often use aspartame, a neurotoxin in big enough doses and the cans are lined with a substance called BPA that has its own adverse health effects. Also, studies have connected a greater intake of cola drinks with things like a bigger chance of contracting bowel cancer.
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This guy that I've been working at a restaurant with has FINALLY asked me out after months of flirting and a couple weeks of texting. We've both been dying to see Batman, so that's what we're going to do. Hes almost 20, as I'm still a senior in High school. He's the cool, laid back partier. He went to a large High school and from what I hear was very popular. I have partied before and am somewhat considered popular or well known in my small high school and the only negative thing about me is that im very self concious about my weight (im 5'7 and plus sized, but I'm deff not a whale) so anyways I am SUPER nervous about how this date will go! Can anyone give me their experience on a first date, or a movie date? This sounds so middle school-ish but what if he tries to kiss me? Haha thanks guys (link)
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He finds you attractive enough to ask out and has put all the time into you he seems pretty sincere. So don't worry about your body, which I'm sure is fine. Just focus on having fun.
As far as the kiss thing goes, I've always figured that, if at the end of the date, she wouldn't kiss me then she wasn't interested. Then I would move on to other girls. Just do what you want to do. Don't let anyone pressure you, and by that I mean either society or the guy, into doing or not doing something. And don't overthink, either. You'll just drive yourself and, ultimately, your man, nuts. Relax, be yourself and go from there!
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Okay this girl and I have a lot of problems... If it isn't her family then its trust... She thinks I'm using her for my own pleasure,, she doesn't believe in true love and happiness which makes things even harder. I've been in many relationships before,, abusive relationships,, relationships based on sex and relationships full of hate,, but the feelings I feel for her are new to me,, I've never felt this strong about anyone in my whole life and I do think that I've found true love... I'm not the type of guy that wants sex and stuff,, its been 1 of my biggest dreams to find that one special girl that I can love and who'll love me in return. I tried explaining to her that I'm not using her but she has trust issues and the more I try to show her that I'm only doing this for the love the more I'm complicating things... I took me 3 years to get to this stage,, we had our first kiss a couple of weeks ago. I was her first kiss and her first "boyfriend-like person"... I don't know how to convince her that I'm not using her. The thing with her parents is complicated because if they find out that we're seeing each other then they'll do to her what they did the last time a guy tried to get into a relationship with her... Her parents are very hard to please,, they don't allow dating because they want her to finish school before she gets into a serious relationship. I'm trying to respect her parents wishes but I'm moving out of town next year to go to college which means that I must wait a whole year for her to finish school first before we can do anything. At the moment we're not dating but we are kinda seeing each other which is complicated. I do love her and I'm trying to show her that I'm not using her,, I'm trying to keep this a secret because if her parents find out about anything then they'll make sure she doesn't see me again and that she doesn't have contact with me... They'll ground her till she's done with school for the year and by that time it'll be too late. I don't know if we should try this long distance thing because in my experience it never lasts... PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME!!!! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO ANYMORE!!!! :'( (link)
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Her parents are abusers. By impeding her ability to make her own decisions they are impeding her growth as a human being. They are effectively infantilizing her and her basically being canned up all the time with no romantic outlet has perhaps resulted in a feeling that she either doesn't deserve to have a real boyfriend or she has been told since early puberty that boys will just try to use her as a playtoy. Her parents should be arrested for what they are doing to that poor girl.
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ok so i am 13 and my brother is 3. a year ago i found out on my dads phone that hes going on to dating websites and talking with other women. and before that i found condoms in his car droor. and i just think he goes to other womens house and you know, does it with them. i dont know what to do. i told my aunt but she told me not to tell anyone. i think when my brother grows up to be my age one day, i will tell him and discuss what to do about it together, but now what do you people think? (link)
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The problem here is that because you are so young and don't know much about how the world works, much less how people think, you should keep this secret to yourself. You have little real idea about what is going on in your parents' marriage other than what they have chosen to show you.
The biggest danger for you personally is that your mom might actually resent you telling her. Yeah, it sounds screwy, but it's been known to happen. Your mom might have convinced herself that nothing is actually going on and, when people are awoken out of their denial they sometimes lash out. Not to mention the REAL nastiness when your mom and dad each get their own lawyers and begin fighting over custody and community property issues in court as a result of the revealed affair.
Look, if you just gotta confront someone about this, talk to your dad, though he will use the gambit of, "why in hell are you snooping on my phone?" And you know what? He would have a point. You want your parents snooping through your text messages or emails? I didn't think so. The best approach may be going up to him and asking him if he still loves your mom because you've been sensing some tension between the two of them lately. That's about as far as you can take it in broaching the subject.
Your brother is too young to know anything about this. Leave him out of this.
Yes, you're caught in the middle here and it definitely sucks. Good luck to you and your brother.
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I'm a 16 year old female and I've had a few boyfriends. This summer I met a girl that I found myself having feelings for. We got super close and became good friends. I've never felt that way about a girl before and I don't see other girls in a romantic way, except for this one. Could I be bisexual or is it just a girl crush? (link)
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At that age, some sexual experimentation, even with gender preferences, is perfectly normal. So relax and just go for it if you like her that much. The thing is that even if you ultimately determine that girls aren't for you as romantic partners at least you will have learned something about yourself as well as what it's like to interact with a same sex partner. On the other hand, if you find that you truly are bisexual being intimate with the girl you are crushing on will be a nice start to realizing more of who you are.
The thing is, don't worry so much about the label. If you find somebody you love, no matter the gender, go for it.
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I am a shy guy. I dont know why I am that way but I lack this confidence to initiate a talk with any girl. Too many questions come to my mind and its gone.
One thing that bothers me is what is the usual or normal duration of an intercourse excluding the time spent on the fore-play.
I am curious because first and the last time I had an intercourse, it lasted merely 1 minute. Is it a normal duration as a first timer or how is it.
What effect does masturbation has or will have on this duration?
What are the possible solutions to enhance the duration of intercourse?
How can I improve my confidence? (link)
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If you're worrying about lasting you won't because what is repressed tends to come out in unpleasant ways. Ask Larry Craig *lol
To stave off ejaculation, the best thing you can do is masturbate before you go out. Then, when you're in bed humping and pumping, just empty your mind. Don't try to suppress your thoughts, just make your body limp like you're trying to become a penis pumping machine and don't think anything. Take a deep breath and just let your thoughts drift away. That helps deaden the sensation and will last a lot longer.
By the way, you know where the making your body limp strategy REALLY comes in handy? On roller coasters. Try it sometime.
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Hey, I am gay 16 year old guy and whenever a guy touches me I get a hard on, but when a grl touches me I don't. How do I keep that under control when we start kissing or holding hands or something small like that?? Cuz I do t wanna be out and kiss him then get a hard on all of a sudden! Help please! (link)
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Dude, every guy gets inappropriate erections at that age. Don't worry about it.
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My boyfriend and I have been having sex for a long time without protection because we always trusted each other,and we swore not to ever cheat on each other.The thing is that lately, things are no longer the same and I'm afraid that he might be cheating on me,and that I might be making a mistake.It's no longer a loyalty matter right now,but a healthy matter actually.I don't know what to do cause if I ask him to wear a condom,I know that he'll feel frustated and he won't trust me either at the same time.Is it wrong what I am thinking?I need some advice,thanks! (link)
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I always tell women that if they feel in their gut that something ain't right it is way more than likely not right. Trust your gut, ladies.
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I've put this under mental health, because I wasn't sure what else to : please don't get offended by that.
Now, we all know that your sexuality isn't a choice. But what determines whether you are homosexual? Nature (you are born homosexual) or nurture (your surroundings) ?
I know people who say they remember being gay forever. I know of others who turn, when they go to same-sex boarding schools. I read a book about one of the most famous all-boy schools in the world. The guy was saying how they didn't know a world outside of the school, and growing up meant they had urges. Because of this, they experimented sexually, and this is where many people 'turned'.
But is it both? Is it different for different people?
I also heard that those who lack a father figure are more likely to be homosexual. This is obviously a generalization, but is there any merit to that statement?
Thanks! (link)
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The brains of homosexuals tend to look more like those of the opposite sex (in other words, the brains of male gays tend to look more like those of females and female homosexuals look more like males) than those of heterosexuals. So it's definitely genetic.
One thing, though: whether people choose it or it's genetic is immaterial to me. Minding one's own business is a virtue and this would be a better world if more people did that. If you wanna love another guy and you're a guy, great! If you're a guy and want to love a girl, great! And etc. It don't hurt me any and love is a beautiful thing!
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20 f
I gained about 25 pounds this year which now makes me 150 and im only 5'2. So im definitely over weight. I was wondering if anyone knows what healthy yummy foods I could eat? I love fold. And im always eating. Thats what got me so big! So anyone know of any foods I could eat.?? (link)
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I'm on a diet right now trying to lose 80 pounds. I'm about 50 into that so far and it hasn't been easy. All I've done is limit myself to 1500 calories a day. I don't limit the range of food I eat or anything like that. I just use small portions and eat at least five times a day to keep my metabolism revved up. Of course, if you exercise, the weight will come off faster.
Just remember that women are genetically built to retain fat and it is the thing that gives them the things guys love (breasts, ass and hips). 125 pounds would definitely be pretty reasonable for you. You can lose the 25 pounds in three months with the diet I'm on as long as you're really determined. Good luck.
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Hello. This is a little bit embarrassing. I'm 22/f and I recently had sex for the first time back in April. The first time that we did it, we were both nervous, as it was both of our first time. We did the best we could, but it wasn't really successful on both our parts because we didn't really know what we were doing. Then, we started to get the gist of things and at least to him, it was feeling pretty good. I don't really feel anything. It actually hurts a little bit. It hurts quite a bit, actually, for a while. When we get more into it and I start loosening up, I felt a tiny itty bitty bit of pleasure that lasted for about a second. Then, it went away. But, he was feeling pretty good. I didn't wanna say that it was hurting me before cuz I didn't wanna make him feel like he was doing something wrong.
What concerns me is that pain that I feel. When I have pleasured myself, I usually get a pillow and just rub on it. It feels so nice. And it's SO soft. It gives me like this tingling feeling down there. It feels absolutely amazing. Why can't I replicate this feeling during sex?
To be honest, last night, we did it, but there was certainly not enough foreplay. We just dug right into it. And perhaps I wasn't really ready enough to dive right into it. But, regardless, it doesn't feel like what it's suppose to feel. Any suggestions for next time? Am I doing something wrong? He's feeling good, why not me?? (link)
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Your experience is pretty typical for first timers. You're learning how each other responds to different touches and to get that absolutely right can take time and you're sorting out your emotions. The best thing you can do is talk it out honestly with your partner and keep things simple without overthinking.
Because everybody is different there isn't a one size fits all solution, which is why my answer is pretty generic. The pain will disappear once you've had sex a few times because your vagina will be used to penetration. So just relax, look at your first few times as a kind of mutual exploration and, of course, take the responsible steps (birth control pills, condoms or both).
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I am only 12, and I have only been emotionally dead for about 3 years. I only told my mom today about it but she doesn't believe it. She doesn't believe that all the smiles, laughs, tears, pain, anger have been fake. I hate it. I hate that I can't do anything to stop this or cure this, but I've grown not to care. But I WANT to care. I do. I just can't. (link)
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The truth is that teenagers can be pretty melodramatic. When I was your age I wasn't depressed, but bored a lot of the time, especially in school. Your brain is still developing and that means that your thoughts and feelings are going through changes with that development. Some of that is no doubt motivated by a lot of self doubt and not really knowing who you are yet and that can lead to a feeling of a loss of control and fear of the future. All you can do is ride it out. Today, there are millions of kids feeling exactly like you. It's just part of growing up. It sucks, but it is what it is. So just try to relax and not get so down on yourself. Actively separate constructive and non-constructive thoughts and then see what you can learn from the whole process rather than just allowing yourself to wallow helplessly in it.
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So...I have a guy-friend who I've developed feelings for...(I'm putting this in the "friendship" category because he is taken, and I've made it clear to him that I have no intention of trying to break them up, I just think me liking him might be relevant in some way)
Anyways...after he asked me whether or not I liked him, he told me it was okay and that he understood and that we would still be friends...we talked, texted, hung out quite a bit...and then he just stopped. He vaguely told me he was upset about something, but nothing more...I've tried to break the ice a few times, but I have not been badgering him or making him feel like he is obligated to me or anything...I DID tell him he could talk to me about it if he wanted, but has said nothing to me at all ever since.
What the heck?! We were getting along so well. It just sort of...happened. One day we were hanging out, and then he just stopped all contact with me. I really miss him. =( I never put any "moves" on him unless we were jokingly flirting with each other...but I do that with a lot of my platonic guy friends...I honestly don't think there was anything I did wrong, but perhaps some of you might have experienced something similar? Please tell me what would cause this kind of behavior... (link)
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He decided that he was wasting his time and decided to cut the cord. Look, it is just about impossible for guys and girls to truly be friends unless the guy is gay. He wanted to get with you and once he was sure you weren't going to come across he split. That's how guys operate. Lesson learned.
Remember this analogy: guys are target oriented. Women are process driven. When he couldn't acquire the target frustration set in and he ultimately bailed.
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I feel like I am super affectionate with my boyfriend, Matthew. I am just SOOO glad to have him in my life, I love him so much, and I'm so proud of him that I can't really keep my hands off him. I'm always hugging him, kissing him on the face or top of the head, and staring at him. The problem is, I've always been afraid that I embarrass him or make him feel awkward when I do that when people are around. It's not like I have my hands all over him in front of our friends and family all the time, I just hug him a lot when were at restaurants and stuff. Then, a few weeks ago, he was almost killed when a huge, rolling truck almost crushed him (no one was hurt just so you know), so I was really hugging and kissing on him a lot in front of some people and running my hand through his hair. Also, a couple days ago, he passed out in front of a crowd at work and was taken to the hospital. He's fine now, but when I saw him afterwards, I did the same thing again, but was a little calmer. He was hugging me back after the truck thing, but not as much at the hospital. I just thought he didn't feel good, but could I embarrass him by doing that stuff. (link)
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You are way overthinking this. Unless he explicitly tells you your public displays of affection are out of bounds then I say keep doing what you feel.
Listen kiddo, it's your life. Enjoy it as you see fit. You only get to do it once. You sound pretty damned cool to me.
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hi.how are you?i am going through a really bad time.i am 22 years old and in a relationship with a girl from past 3 years we fight alot but from last 17 days she has started loving a friend of mine and she told me this herself.she even told this to that friend of mine but now he is ignoring her because he is in love with some one else.i love this girl alot and seriously cant live without her but she is all the time talking about that friend of mine and crying because of him.this thing is hurting me alot i feel like killing my self.pls help me out of this. (link)
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You're not going to like what I say, but here goes:
1. Your brain keeps developing until you are 25-26 years old. This means that you experience a lot of evolution in your taste and thoughts on things and that includes what partners you want to be with down the road. Your girlfriend has had a change of heart. It happens. You were too young to be stuck in a relationship anyway. If you don't have that exploratory phase of dating life you will regret it later. In adversity there is often opportunity and this is your chance to go out and mingle and really get a handle on what's out there as far as possible partners. So git!
2. Clinging to a woman who has checked out like that is redolent of both stalkers and needy wimps who have such low self esteem they can't believe that anyone else would want them. In other words, you are believing in something that is unhealthy. If she wanted you at one time someone else will want you, too. In fact, probably dozens of someone elses. So get in there my son!
3. You've humiliated yourself by allowing her to cuckold you. Instead of booting her once you got wind of her seeking other partners you go to her on bended knee and ask her to reconsider. Come on, dude, have some pride as a man, okay?
4. Suicide, except in cases of being afflicted with some awful terminal disease, is inherently a narcissistic act. So knock that crap off and show her that you're in demand and she lost out. Otherwise, people will laugh at you for all time as the "loser who killed himself over a girl."
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What happens if too much manstupation is done for long years?
(link)
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You have to define your terms. What is "too much"? Ten times a day? Five times a day? Twice a week? Masturbation is the pleasure machine you don't have to pay for unless you just let it get in the way of other facets of your life. It's not dirty and is perfectly normal.
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I am turning 18 in 2 days and i want to sleep over at my boyfriends house. I don't know how to tell my parents about this they are extremely strict. All we are going to do is watch a series on tv all night. What do i tell my parents? (link)
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You are now a legal adult. Your love/sex life is none of your parents' business.
At some point, your parents have to cut the cord and allow you to be your own person. If you've acted in a trustworthy way in the past they have no reason to give you any guff about what you do after becoming a legal adult.
And listen, if you two want to do the wild thing all night, go for it. Just be responsible about it. Or if you don't want to do it, that's cool, too. Just do what makes you happy.
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me and this guy my bf want to have sex but want to stay virgins until married we are fifteen and sugesstions (link)
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Okay, first, there is nothing dirty about sex. The "purity" argument the religious nuts make about holding off sex does a disservice to the public at large. Sex is fun and life affirming if both partners care for each other and can honestly communicate about it.
Nonetheless, the rational person says that teenagers, because they still have developing brains and thus aren't all that cognizant of consequences for their actions, should not have sex because the consequences can be serious and life changing at a time when they aren't mature enough to realize the possible implications, including psychological ones, let alone raise a family. Unfortunately, as long as organized religion keeps dangling sex as a forbidden fruit, teenagers will be forever attracted to it.
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14/f
This year, our band at school has had problems with many people quitting. We were lucky to have one specific member of our section stay. He is really talented and he brings a lot of fun to our section. Earlier, he found out that his last main friend in band has quit so now he's really depressed. I really want to cheer him up because I hate seeing him so sad. Some friends of mine and I are planning a surprise party for him on Saturday. Does anybody have any ideas for that or anything else we could do cheer him up. I really appreciate all answers (link)
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I don't get this: you're saying that your friend in the school band is in full blown depression because a buddy of his quit? Or is he in just one of those teenage states of, "this class isn't as much fun without so and so in it, too." Now either your friend has deep seated problems or you guys are totally overreacting to this stuff. If he has deep seated problems, a surprise party won't solve them. If he is just a sulking teenager I would ignore the complaint and move on.
One thing that concerns me, though, is why there seems to be such an exodus of band members. Maybe the band needs a new leader.
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