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Q: Okay, my best friend kelli was dating this guy mark for a good 4-5 months. Mark broke up with her about early October. Well, even though i was mad he dumped her, me and him still stayed close friends. and so did him and kelli. now kelly is dating this guy named adam. anyways, all of a sudden, mark started being really flirty with me lately.. and people told me he likes me. and the thing is, i like him too. but the other thing is, kelli is not over mark at all! she has a lot of feelings for him still but i dont think thats fair to adam at all. but today when i told her i kind of liked mark, she freaked out on me. and now i feel really bad and im not sure what to do.

mmmm,
she needs to dump adam and follow mark around like a lovesick puppy or allow you to date mark.
otherwise she should start building on a harem structure or something and throwing all men she likesin there.
Above everything tell her how you see it, if you can't talk to her about it you're not that good friends anyway, being able to speak what you really feel builds or breaks friendships but bottom line is you'll be better off.
Take a little time to workout a aproach.
Good Luck!

Q: what is a way that you could be understanding if your boyfriend makes out with another girl while your going out. like how can you be a pacifist..saying like "well i trust him and i know he still loves me" or something idk (thats why im asking)

thanks

you could be understanding by:

1.Kicking his arse, personally

2.Getting someone BIG to kick his arse for you

3.making a pendant out of his genetalia

4.Doing something creative with the other girls intestines and presenting it to him as a gift would be considered understanding.

5.Dumping him

I could go on but i'm sure you get the idea...

Good luck

Q: What do you do if you want to kiss your girlfriend. But you dont know if you are ready

this is the part where you have to be the man. Firstly YOU must decide if you are ready.
If you do go for it...it is kinda weird the first time, but you need to take control, she'll tell you if there's a problem (always remember that, women like guys to lead the way).

Try the hair test if you are unsure of how she feels, play with her hair while talking with her (dreamily staring into her eyes), usually the conversation tends to slow down, if she don't like it she'll tell you, then just slowly lean in. The rest come naturally.

If you kiss her the first time NO groping!
Her head, neck and back are safe.
But then again all women are differant, so just do it anyway you want, control is key (including self-control when she don't want to).

Last of all, enjoy it, it's all about fun anyway!

Q: I really like this older guy and he likes me. The age difference is quite big, he's in his mid 40's and I am 27.
We both like each other and have been on a couple of dates, but I'm worried about other people;s reaction to us.
For example, we had many raised eyebrows when we went out to a restaurant together. Someone asked me if he was my father!!
Also other friends of mine that have met him don't find him attractive and don't know what I see in him. I've always gone for guys with nice personalities than good looking guys who were jerks. So what if he's a little overweight and going grey?
He treats me well and I feel like I can talk to him about anything.
What should I say to everyone who is trying to break us up?

other people can tell you what they see, you decide if you want to take their advice, very much like this site.

Tell those people what YOU think about the situation, if they respect you and love you, they will have to accept you choice.

Q: 14/f. Here's the thing. I am so in love (ok, like) with this guy. There's only one problem-He's my teacher! But he's so hott! He's also funny, nice, and smart. I really like him, but I don't want to b/c he's too old for me, and nothing's ever going to happen between us. How can I convince myself to not like him?

nothing wrong with having a crush on somebody, even if he's your teacher.

No use in trying to deceive yourself, better try to deal with it, so next time (and trere usually are next times) you know how to deal or at least how not to deal with it.

Only way I know of getting over someone though is to get somebody else.

goodluck :)

Q: hey i got a new job. and my friend margeret works there, shes cool with a lot of people. margaret was talkin to this boy craig and hes popular and he gave her his number for me to call him. so i talked to him online but i was too scared to call him. a couple days later i decided to call him but he didnt anwser so i left a message with my number and telling craig to call me back. but he never did. i joked about it with him and he told me he didnt have service in his room. he always asks me too hang out but we did tonight and he didnt even talk and just decided to leave after a while. my friend margaret says he likes me. why else would he give me his number. i called him again tonight but he talked to me for like 2 minutes and then randomly had to go.his sister's friend marcy said that she was talking to him and she said believe me he likes you he is just the very shy type today at lunch. i dont know what to do. or think.please help meeeeeeeee

you could try too boost his ego a tad, supposed to work for some girls.
err..don't ask me how though...
check him out, see what his better points are, tell him.

hope this helps good luck :)

Q: when ur dancing w/ a guy..what kind of dance moves can u do? both fast and slow dancing. tx in advance!

err...id have to show you, though you might laught...or people might laught at you...
move to the music,
or get lessons.

Q: OK i have a friend. She is really nice and we met when we were really little. We used to be like the best of best friends. I moved to a schoo, in a diff city for 3 years and she stayed here. Now we moved back and we are still friends. We go to the same school, we in the same grade and we get along. So on somedays we couldn't be closer and everything is great, but the next day she is ignoring me like I hurt her feelings or something. She sits beside me in this one class and she'll turn away and talk to naother one of our friends and won't say a WORD to me. Then I'll ask her what's wrong and she will be like nothing. And continue with what she was doing. Today was one of those days.
WHAT DO I DO???

have a serious talk then she is "in the mood".
she can't be your friend one day and ignore you flat the next.

i can't really tell who is right, but i have had a couple of those aquantances that are like you described your friend, bestpalls the one day the next day your shit.
i wrote them off.
either be my friend or not.

but maybe you did hurt her feelings, so talk to her first.

if people have shit with you they should sort it out with you (and visa versa), especially if you are supposed to be friends.

good luck :)

Q: There is this boy on my bus named Joey and I have had a crush on for a good while. He usually sits with me and is always flirting with me but will not ask me out. He tells me that he likes me and everything but there is only one problem. EVERYONE on our bus hates him. This boy that I have known scence I was five wants to fight him and everyone is tryin to get me to choose sides. Some people are even tryin to get me and him NOT to go out... I have told him that I like him and yesterday even wrote I love Joey on my hand but he still just wont ask me out... What should I do?
Luv Alwz,
Ashley

maybe he knows how much everybody hates him, and he don't want to get you involved in his mess?

if you ask me, ask him out (welcome to the 21st century, plus it don't have to be a date date), or at least "casually" ask him why he hasn't asked you out yet.

by the sound of it, you don't mind that everybody hates him. i like people who are willing to make up their own minds about things.

people should grow up and respect your views. they are allowed to tell you how they feel but they can't (and you should not allow them) to decide for you.

Don't choose any sides, when somebody behaves fuckedup then tell them what you choose and, if you want to, why (you don't have to explain yourself to anybody).

good luck :)

Q: my boyfriend is always gone.. hes either at baseball or football or out with the guys or at the lake..he never tells me when he has to do stuff and when he is home and i wanna do something he makes me feel bad because he starts to tell me how much he misses me but its not my fault hes never home.. but rele i miss him a lot too and thats the main reason it bothers me..i wanna be able to talk to him more and see him more.. is there anything that i can do...??

Nothin wrong with going to the lake or hanging out with his friends, but he MUST make time for you too. Of course this doesn't mean that he should be around you 24/7, I REALLY RECOMMEND AGAINST ANYWAY, but come to a compromize with him.
Tell him how you see it.

Honestly though, if he wants something that will always be waiting for him when he eventually gets back from where-ever, he should get a dog.
If he expects you to make time for him, he'll have to same for you.

hope this will help you out and
good luck

Q: Under my right arm pit have this lumb thats pretty tall adn the size of maybe a nickle. It hurts and my mom said its an in grown hair and ive had it the last 3 days.. Okay? well I just loked and left and more are growing. It hurts to raise my hand and there solid.. I dont know what is it? Please dont tell me to go to the docters because i will if i have to but my mom told me a day ago that they would cutt it.. So im afraid..

Okay, This sounds stupid but for the last month I;ve had a toe infection and its taking forever to heal? No i didnt go to the docters but i did put meddison on it...

:-\ HELP!!!--Meg :-\

if you're really scared, wait a day or two and see if it improves.
but if there is no progress, go see a docter.
chances are there that they might cut, but chances are that its not that serious at all.
the docters should be able to tell you whats going on.
Docters are there to help, if you are afraid, ask them what they are going to do and tell them how you feel about it. if you feel whoozy just thinking of the procedure, ask whem to have you lie on your back.
But in the end, take a little pain now, rather than alot later.

Good Luck.

Q: Long story semi-short. I like 2 guys, one asked me out before the other so I agreed. Now I have a boyfriend but the other guy is mad and isn't talking to me. I atleast want him as a friend, but I don't want to ruin the relationship I have now. What should I do?

if you want to be his friend, just be yourself around him, no matter if he talks back or what.
when he is over you, then he'll (maybe) talk to you and you can take it from there.

have you ever liked someone, who then goes out with someone else and have to sit opposite them wherever watching them holding hands,kissing,...
i have been there and i'd rather have my heart removed with a rusty spoon than go through that again.
just give him a bit of space, sometimes a person needs to protect himself.

goodluck.

Q: okay. wel i went out w/ this guy (btw. im 14/f) and he dumped me,n we both have new bf's/gf's and yeah well he treats his new gf better than he treated me...im jelous..i love my bf.he treats me like effing gold.but ive just been thinking about it lately..what's the deal w/ that..my ex? thnx ♥

forget about your ex, be happy for his new girlfriend, be happy with your bf.
maybe he treated her badly once and she really beat him up bad...who knows.

Q: Allright, I've liked this girl I've known for a while, but everytime I start to make a move she hooks up with someone else. I know I'm waiting too long, I just don't know when the opprotune moment. For the past year she's been going out with my best friend. My best friend recently broke up with her girlfriend, but he told me what he was going to do beforehand.

She's one of my best friends; I've known her nearly all my life. And someone found out. That someone told her everything. She's not acting any differently towards me and I don't know what to make of my situation. Should I back off? OR should I hope for the best. Please, I don't know what to do.

You don't know what she knows, someone found out something, that someone might have told her who knows what, those stories almost always get twisted around, do you want her believing you like her cause you allegedly think her scew big toe looks funky?
go straighten out how you feel about her, while you're at it you might as well find out how she feels.
Prepare for the worst, hope for the best.

Q: i just got this red bump on my vagina. it doesnt hurt or anything but it has been there for about a week? what is it?

im not a girl but if there is ANY red bump anywhere near my equiptment for more than a day, RUN to the doctor.
better safe than sorry.
besides i heard this really disturbing story about a girl who got used as a spiders breeding ground....suffice to say: RUN, girl RUN!!!

Q: Ok I have this friend who has to be exact all the time and when I say something and it isnt exact she always corrects me.I know its not a big deal and its probably really mean for me to say this but it just bugs the crap out of me!! Please help!!

doesn't sound like she's trying being mean, and i can definately understand your side. Try playing with her, if she does it again, start making ALOT of mistakes on purpose or just tell her to loosen up.

Q: Well Lately people have been spreading rumours about me that I am easy and a slut and stuff. And then one of my really good friends called me easy and a slut and it really hurt meh! And I really hate rumours like this! it hurts meh really badly. And also lately my parents have been yelling at me about stupid phone bills! And my dad pushed my sister about it and it really scared meh! I used to be abused when I was little but my family got help and its ok now but when he pushed her it just brought back all the bad memorys! Also for about two yeaars up until around march I was suicidal but then I got the cops called on meh and they came to my house and it was really scary so I stopped cause I didnt want that to happen again! Also I was anerexic and balimic on and off for about 2 years also. Lately alot of things have been happening that have made me want to result back to cutting but I don`t want to and I find myself going into the bathroom alot staring at blades just thinking about it and wanting to but then I come in my room and stay here. Also Sense the rumours I have been feeling useless and like I`ll never find a guy that will treat meh good and Ive just felt like I wont ever be special to anyone and its been getting me really depressed. Wanting to work out heavely to make myself look prettyer. I dont know what to do! I Want to know ways to look prettyer and maybe get guys to like meh and I need advice on my cutting and all the other stuff I wrote about! please help
14/f
_please
love maddie

first of all, that thesinger guy is a shit head, check that he has been telling other people. but he serves as a perfect example of how fucked up MOST people are.

Those rumours are there no matter who you are,
the sooner you start to ignore them the better.
You should hear the ones about me, if I actually started to take them to heart I'd also be staring at blades.

Most guys (i respect, and decent ones) I know don't like extremly skinny girls, they complain that those girls are too skinny and bony.

You really need to get to know yourself, guys are not the awnser to your happyness, you need to make yourself happy.
A healthy relationship is about two people who are capable of living on their own, but choose to be together.

Shit there are too many thing I want to tell you but I'll be going on for hours, PLEASE read "The road less traveled" by M. Scott Peck, thats the best advice I can give you.

Q: i have a problem.. see im gettin over this guy who i posted a lot about in my other questions.. but he had a gf so im gettin over him.. but i have a friend and hes been helping me alot with this.. hes been my shoulder to cry on and i think im startin to like him.. the thing is he is too.. BUT he recently told one of my best friends that he likes her.. now shes gettin clingy and there not even goin out and shes gettin obsessive! hes not sure wats hes gonna do bc hes not sure if he still likes her.. but he always tells me not to worry about it and how confused he is and stuff.. i talk to him for hours on the phone and today i was sitting in church and she was in between us and next to him was my other good friend ashley.. she turns to me and goes.. i dont like how ashley is with dan .. shes startin to get me madd..shes flirting with him soo much.. im like ashley has a bf.. but wat really bothered me was that she has noo idea wats going on! i dont want her to get hurt but i have a feelin he doesnt like her that much anymore and i dont know wat to do bc if she said that about ashley, wat would she say about me??? wat do i do??

i'm not sure if i get the whole picture, so i'm just going to tell you how i see it...

the situation sounds teribly complicated and sounds as if its going to explode pretty soon, a pretty HUGE fuckup.

sounds like dan is confused. the best thing for him would be to lie low for a while, start a zen garden and first sort himself out, else he is going to hurt people and himself, he needs a friend not a gf.

your best friend sounds insecure, i'd say she'll need to sort herself out too, she well on her way to getting hurt, i knew a person that acts the way you described her, hope she will but i don't think shes going to listen to reason.

I was in a situation...errr...in ways simular to this one and...errr...DO NOT TRY TO FIX IT, getting caught up in the middle of this will only get you blamed in the end.
you can only tell your friends how you see it. chances are great they won't like what you have say. after that take a step back, go out meet new people, let it hit the fan and help your friends pick up the pieces afterwards (if they will allow you).

Just take it easy.

Q: I drank last night and got tipsy. I remember everything so I wasnt really drunk. Anyways I think I have a small hangover. I feel like I'm going to throw up and I'm a little light headed. What should I do? Should I force myself to throw up to get it out of my system, should I eat or take medicine or something? Please help I really dont feel good.

you should have drunk alot of water before you went to sleep last night (maybe even a asprin).
drink a asprin and get back into bed.
i suggest eating a tomato or drinking a tomato cocktail (no salt or extras).
If your stomach feels irritated drink hot water.
If you puke out everything you try to eat/drink (including water) it's propably alcahol poisoning, and the only thing i could take in that time was luke warm water (as close to your body temperature as posible).
good luck.

Q: I know this might not sound like that big of a deal but it is for me!

Well my mom and me have been fighting a lot lately..........almost like every day. But its never my fault like i would say " Mom there's no more laundry detergent." the she would blow up and say " Of course we dont because you have to use so much" and then she would start yelling at me bacause i ask for so much stuff and that she has no money to spend and i hate! I really dont want to hear about her problems then when i say that i don't want to hear it then she starts yelling at me again! please help me and tell me what to do! im going to start school on tuesday, and i dont want this to mess with my head so please help !

Sorry man, there is no easy way.
Sounds like your moms under alot of stress and so are you. You'll need to be a friend to your mom.
Sounds like you guys have money trouble, and on a perant I sure that it might well be the biggest part of her stress, try to distract her from it by telling a joke from time to time.
It sounds like she needs your support, try to see it from her side. You'll need to be mature about this.

I was fourteen when I started waitering cause my perants went bankrupt the year before, I also had fights with my dad and also the same type of scenarios you are descibing, to the extend where I told him "fuck you", and he hit me in the face. I was pretty fucked up and at school nobody understood. I wasn't making it easier on them.
that year I paid for my sisters matric-farewell dress (suppose thats like the graduation dance the americans have). IT SUCKED, but sometimes thats the way life is.

You could try to relieve some of the stress your mom has or you could be part of it. By trying to relieve some of hers, you may well relieve some of your own. In the end family is ALL you really have.