Member Since: May 3, 2011
Answers: 1053
Last Update: December 12, 2012
Visitors: 30919
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i'm a teen girl and my ex boyfriend wants to take our son for a week. he barley ever sees our son the last time was a few months ago. he is very unpredictable and when we were together he would get high around our son. i don't want that happening anymore so i said no. he is very pissed off at me and said i was being completely unfair. i don't want him to be sad and i want my son to know him but i don't trust him. what should i do? (link)
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Short of violating a custody agreement determined by a court of law, you can tell him to take a long walk off a short pier. Getting high in front of a child is grounds not only for imprisonment, but for having the child being made a ward of the state.
Your relationship with the BF is over. Period. Some guys are meant to be dads and some aren't. This one isn't. So stop worrying about him and focus instead on the welfare of your son. Don't sabotage your life or your son's by keeping the loser around.
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Hi. I'm turning 18 in September, I live in PA. I graduate high school in June and originally the plan was for me to move down with my mom, brother and sister to Georgia. I was excited about the move because I enjoy GA and a lot of family members live there, however, as the time approaches, I'm wanting to go less and less. This happend for several reasons. My friends, most of them, are staying in-state and attending the local community colleges or just colleges that are close by. I recently got a boyfriend 1 month ago. And I found out that colleges charge per-semester, meaning that, just to attend a community college in GA (which I have to if I go) will cost me $20,000 for the first year since I'm not a resident of the state! All of these together are causing me great stress and it's on my mind 24/7. I try talking to my family but they get pissed now since I'm changing my mind. But, it's my life right? I should be able to choose where I want to attend college. The main issue was that I would need a place to stay if I stay here because I would attend community college; that issue was solved because a friend of my mom's who we've known our whole lives would have no problem taking me in, yet my mom still refuses! Then my best friend mentioned applying to this one school, a 4-year, which is kind of easy to get into, and I could stay in the dorms, etc. But I feel guilty doing this behind my mother's back and I'm not sure if I really want to live in a dorm. I really don't know what to do. I'm getting depressed even though this time of year should be joyous for a high school senior. Should I just refuse to go? It's my life, why should I let my mother rule over it? She's not even paying for college, and when I told her how much it would cost for an out-of-state student all she said was "that sucks". I'm so close to running away because I just can't deal with this stress of everyone trying to tell me what to do; family, friends. I'm 100% sure I want to stay here for now. Please help and give me ANY advice, thank you. (link)
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First, you shouldn't degrade your choice of colleges just to fit a need for housing.
Secondly, you can go down to Georgia, work for a year, and save money (you are going to need it for tuition and books anyway) and then go to JC when you are eligible for in state tuition.
The thing is that when you stay with your parents while you go to college it makes things a whole lot easier psychologically. You aren't that worried about losing your job, you get three meals a day you don't pay for and you will always have a roof over your head no matter what. In exchange for that, you owe it to your folks to hit the books HARD.
As for the boyfriend back home, very little chance of that developing into anything permanent. Sorry to say, but you should probably break up with him.
Once you finish JC, you will then have the option of determining where you want to go to to finish the final two years of your undergrad education, so there is still time to get away from mom and dad if you just feel as if you are outgrowing living with them. Once you wrap up your bachelor's, try living overseas for a while. It's good for you.
But you gotta make definite plans and that year break in Georgia from school gives you time to carefully do so.
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i was thinking of getting him a throw blanket of his favorite sports team, a pillow for the college hes going to, and i want to make him somethhing for him. he wrote like the story of us for valentines day and i absolutely loved it because it was basically a time line of our relationship. i want to do something along those lines, but every idea i come up with is either really similar, not personal enough, or too corny. i need to come up with something from the heart that shows how much i love him. we dont have a lot of pictures :/ open to any ideas. and what do you think about the blanket and pillow? thanks! (link)
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Nothing says "I love you" like an enthusiastic blowjob.
Okay, that was being a little snarky (though it's not entirely so), but you can pass on giving him any of the stuff you mentioned. The reason is if he doesn't like something then he knows it will make you feel bad and he will be uncomfortable doing the damage control necessary to hide his lack of enthusiasm for your present.
The thing that makes this difficult is that I get the vibe that he doesn't live in the same vicinity now as you do. I was going to suggest that you meet him, strip down to some hot lingerie and give him a lapdance and then screw his brains out. He will get the message then. Definitely don't put anything on video. That will certainly end up on the net at some point.
Is there a chain restaurant he likes? Some of them have gift certificates. You can send him a care package of his favorite food and drink (though that may seem like a "mom" move, but still, pretty cool).
You can always have phone sex with him, too. Whatever you decide, good luck.
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I have never been called ugly, but I've also never been called beautiful. I'm not sure. I mean, I've liked guys but none of them have ever liked me back. In the 5th grade I told a guy I used to like him but don't anymore. (It wasn't true that I didn't like him, I just wanted to test the waters. I wanted ti see his reaction.) That was thhe biggest mistake of my life because after I said I didn't like him anymore, I heard him say, "Good." My mom also once told me that the only guys that would want to hit on me would be pedophiles, (I'm really short so I look like I'm 14 even though I turned 18 in February.) the sad part is that I think she might be right. The only guys that have ever "liked" me are old guys and some of the creepy guys at our school. Whenever I even try to hit on a guy they laugh in my face. I feel like I shouldn't be so down on myself and sometimes I look in the mirror I feel like the prettiest thing in the world, but other times, I look in the mirror and feel completely disgusted with how I look. Is there a way to get people to tell you the truth about how you look? (link)
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It actually doesn't matter how conventionally good you look. The main things are that you are clean, dress appropriately for your body and skin tone and are nice, have a sense of humor and some brains. It would also help if you are into sports (particularly football, basketball and/or baseball).
We are all handed a certain lot in life. Don't stress over that which you can't really control (for example, you're height is genetically determined and you could still end up getting taller, it just depends on your genetic code) and just keep moving forward. If you meet enough people someone or several dozen someones is going to want to have you as their partner.
On the other hand, if you seem moody and depressed all the time because of how you perceive your looks nobody is going to want to date such a sad sack. I know a girl who is pretty homely (but really smart, funny and a sports fan) and she has had boyfriends (and has one now). So don't worry, unless you lock yourself up in your house all the time you'll be okay.
Go to college, do well, meet people, love yourself, live overseas after you graduate, and just keep on rockin'.
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Is there a way for him to cum inside your vigina and nt get pregan? (link)
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Condom or some intrauterine device (a diaphragm or cervical cap). The problem with the condom, though, is that they can break.
As far as pregnancy goes, anytime a guy puts his penis inside a vagina, the woman can get pregnant, even if he doesn't have an orgasm (the pre-cum is loaded with sperm), which is why the pull out method doesn't work (a onetime friend of mine became the father of twins trying to use the pull out method exclusively).
So get on the pill or use an IUD if you're going to have sex. Keep in mind that if you get the pill you have to wait a month between the time you begin using it and when you can start having sex.
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hi,
k so theres this guy that i really like, and before i liked him my cousin had this thing for him too. It started off her liking him, i kinda liked him back then but then i stepped away because she called dibs first. When she finally got over him, i started to notice him again, and then it started out me and him saying hi to each other whenever we passed by each other, and then we started to talk to each other conversationally. i told my cousin that i kinda liked him, and she said that she was fine with that and that she was totally over him anyways. But today when he said that he would sponser me to a dance, she started to get pissed off and then she started crying. since then i tried to talk to her, but she wouldn't listen to me and then she would run away from me. What should i do ??!?!?!! (link)
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It's her problem. One of the growing experiences of life is dealing with loss. She may be mourning the break up of the relationship still, but the fact remains that the relationship is indeed kaput, which makes it open season on the guy. And by thinking of her while you are trying to solidify your relationship with the guy will only complicate things and turn him off bigtime.
So go at him with enthusiasm and if she wants to continue having a hissy fit then she still has some growing up to do emotionally. That's not your fault.
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i like a guy who is my boyfriend's best friend and he has a girlfriend too. at the beginning he gave reaction to me but later he stopped. i want him back so badly but the problem is with him i dont know why. what should i do exactly to make him want me?
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If you're already thinking about new partners, you need to break up with your current boyfriend since you aren't 100% committed to him. Don't have a boyfriend just because you like the attention.
Also, you can't "make somebody want you." That is because you have to be you and not act according to how you think people want you to. Otherwise, you will come off as one neurotic puppy. Besides, if he doesn't like the real you then he isn't suited for you anyway. Don't put all your eggs in one basket.
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I'm sixteen and female. Because I am the age I am and I'm not sexually active that often, I don't shave all the way. It's usually just a trim, and I'm fine with it, but now I am just so grossed out by it. I have shaved with a razor and soap, trimmed it with scissors, but I want to really get it all thin without it being annoying and such. Bikini Wax is out of the picture definitely because I'm kinda broke and I don't think I'm old enough. Is there anything I can do to shave without any pain or expensive procedures? (link)
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Use a pre-shave lotion, a brand new razor and sculpt your hair how you wish. Use hot water, too.
The main thing is that you are keeping it at least trimmed. So it will look okay to any partner you may have. Your vaginal area is not gross (in fact, the vagina is beautiful), so relax and do whatever you're comfortable with. Again, as long as your pubic hair is at least neatly trimmed you're good to go.
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Is it a sin to sleep naked with the one you love? (link)
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First, sins are something that is determined religiously. Religions are largely grounded on fairy tales, so you should just forget about the whole concept of sin and live by the credo that you treat others as you would want to be treated. Nice and simple, no overthinking required.
Nothing wrong with sleeping naked with the one you love. In fact, it rocks. Your bodies aren't dirty (unless you don't bathe *lol), so enjoy this simple pleasure.
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what is the emancipation proclamation in simplest terms? (link)
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Since the southern economy was based on cotton, which required slaves to do all the hard work, Lincoln issued the Emancipation Proclamation in order to disrupt the southern economy. If nobody was working the fields then the south had no cotton to export to England, for example, and therefore no money to raise armies and weapons.
However, it should be noted that Lincoln was never a friend of blacks and thought them inferior, but it is also true he believed that slavery on the basis of ethnicity also provided a rationale to impose slavery on just about any other basis one could devise, thereby threatening the liberty of even white folks.
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can a brother make sex with his sister (link)
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Not legally. That is a crime in just about every state and country in the world and for good reason.
Physically, yeah, it can happen, but it usually doesn't turn out well psychologically for either child down the road. It can disrupt their sex lives forever due to the hangups it causes. So incest is never a good idea.
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Sorry this is long...hope you like novels :P
I was going out with her for 9 months but it was the slowest relationship ever! We enjoyed each other’s company but we were so shy. We hardly ever went on dates and never got very far, it was a bit pathetic really. By the time we got to the point where we could have had a normal, awesome relationship she’d lost interest and we broke up a couple of months ago. Of course we said “we’ll still be friends” but that’s always just the nicest way of saying “I want to break up with you”. Stupidly I took this to mean that we both just wanted a break (that’s how I felt anyway) so it was pretty heart wrenching when she got a new boyfriend about a month ago. I’ve spent the last 2 months trying to get over her, forget her etc but I can’t seem to do it. I spend every moment at home trying to convince myself that it’s over, it’s for the best and I don’t love her anymore etc but as soon as I see her again at school that all goes out the window. I’m always daydreaming about her coming back to me or about how I could have done things better and stuff and then I realize how pathetic it is that I’m still doing this after 2 months, snap out of it and get really angry with myself. Then 10 minutes later I’m doing it again, it’s tearing me apart and becomes a huge distraction (I’m meant to be doing an art assignment right now :P) I love her but I guess I have 2 options:
a) use advice from you guys to move on (realistic)or
b) use advice from you guys to get her back (desired)
Thanks soo much :)
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Dude, hanging on to an old relationship emotionally makes you look needy, a quality women can sense and really, really hate. Each relationship teaches you something and the only thing you can do is determine what you have learned so you don't make the same mistake in your next one.
I also have to say that the way you guys acted is not that uncommon. A couple of insecure teens is pretty par for the course. So don't beat yourself up for it. You weren't going to marry her anyway.
What you should be doing at your age is dating a lot of different girls. Teens are so anxious for validation that they fail to realize that they need to get out there and experience life and shouldn't get tied down until they are at least in their late 20's. You have lots of time and your feelings, attitudes and personality are going to evolve a lot over the next decade.
So relax, realize that you are the only one who can live your life and carve out for yourself what you feel makes you happiest. And that is easier to attain if you have different experiences that will lend you a fuller view of life and yourself.
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Am from India...My uteres seems to be small and I have syst in my overy due to tht the egg cant able to break... do i and my husband can keep sex and we have to postpond tht .... (link)
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You're overthinking. Relax. Your doctor, and India has great physicians, knows what he is talking about. You won't have any trouble conceiving unless there is some other problem. For now, just let things happen when they want to happen and don't stress yourself out. Your worth as a person is not solely tied to your ability to have children.
And don't forget, sometimes the problems conceiving are due to the man (low sperm count, for example).
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How do i know that my boyfriend feels the same way about me the way I feel about him (link)
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This is a question a woman should never, ever ask a man. Here's why:
Women bond with each other through a lot of verbal disclosure. What that does is help them develop a more nuanced way of discussing their emotions and better visual acuity.
Men are dominance oriented and therefore bond through doing stuff. They are also socially rewarded for their ability to suck it up when things get tough or painful without complaining about it. Moreover, they are also rewarded for shows of aggression (think sports, which are little more than contests of dominance) and NOT for talking about what secrets or feelings lurk in the deepest parts of their souls. Women tend to reward aggressive guys, especially jocks or high flying businessmen, and leave the sensitive souls behind because they want someone who is like daddy, a rock she can depend on for nurturing the family she wants to have and not some wussy too in touch with his imperfections as a human being.
So since men don't get rewarded for being verbal (unless their social group is mostly nerds), you are never going to get an answer from that question that you will find completely satisfying. That is because men just do not get practice or socially rewarded for discussing that stuff. When a women does ask your question, he tends to freeze him up or make him feel flustered. If he is showing he loves you through his actions then leave out the "how much do you love me" question, which tends to strike men as a rather narcissistic ploy for extra attention. This is one thing that makes Japanese women better to interact with than American women: Japanese girls are raised to pick up on the worth of actions over words. So Japanese women never ask such a question.
So relax, don't overthink and don't corner him with emotional gobbledygook that will leave a bad taste in his mouth. Just enjoy being with him and leave it at that.
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20 Female. Connor 19
Me and Connor used to "talk" for about 4 months. We actually got really close, like we could talk about everything. That's until he decided he didn't want to talk anymore and blew up on me. We didn't talk for about 2 months and then he eventually apologized twice for being such a jerk and asked if we could still be friends. Connor has a big house, and so they always have these huge parties. Well he said I could come with Joe (One of my good friends, who also knows Connor through hockey) one time and that he hopes to see me over the summer.
I haven't talked to Connor in about a month now since he asked if we could still be friends. Well just yesterday Joe texted me saying "Are we gonna go to Connor's this summer for a party sometime?" and I said "Haha yeah we can but I'm sure it will be kind of weird at first with everything that happened so you can't leave me right away!"
The thing is, I'd really like to see Connor again and be friends. It's just that I know it's gonna be awkward since it would be the first time I'd seen him since everything happened. I know he'd be nice to me but I also wouldn't know anyone except Connor and Joe at the party. I'd hate to be that awkward person. I'm not that good with meeting new people. Once I get to know someone, I'm outgoing but going into a party with a bunch of people I dont know, I will be intimidated.
Plus there is always a lot of girls that go too I guess, so I have a feeling they will be staring at me and being like "Whose that girl?" I know I'd get along good with the guys though.
Do you think I should go? I really want to, I'd obviously be really nervous but I think it'd be good for me. How can I fit in with everyone and not be that "awkward person" Of course it's gonna be even more nerve-wrecking with all those girls there that I don't know (you know how girls can be) so how can I be someone that's approachable? ANY suggestions? Thanks! :) (link)
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Let me clue you in about male-female relationships here: men and women can't be friends. Guys are hunters and are therefore target or goal directed. The reason he was talking to you all that time before the blowup was that he wanted to get with you. However, he was too chicken to pull the trigger on asking you out because you weren't hitting him over the head with signs that you wanted to be his girlfriend (guys are REALLY dumb about that). He finally got tired of it, was feeling emotionally used and so blew up even though he should have manned up and asked you out.
This is standard operating procedure for nice guys, unfortunately. So if you're going to put a guy on the dreaded "friend list" then you should make that clear early on so he can choose to not waste his time looking at you as mate material.
He had second thoughts about the way he ranked you out because, hey, he's a nice guy, but his silence since then says that he has put you on the back burner and is moving on. I would give the party a miss unless you want to be his girlfriend since the alcohol at the party will give him the courage to make a bigtime pass at you.
Look at this as a learning experience and move on.
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I went on a date with my boyfriend. We got into the back of his car and started making out. He wanted to finger me but i was on my period... I didnt tell him that but i just told him we had to stop. He seemed disappointed and sad but i coulldnt really do anything for him... How can me and my boyfriend still do stuff with me on my period? (link)
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First, remember that your life is your own and don't let others control it for you. At your age, the relationship is likely not to result in anything permanent. So do only that which makes you comfortable. Guys aren't some privileged class who you have to do everything for.
You can tell him you're on your period. There is nothing embarrassing about that. He isn't going to think ill of you for it.
If you want him to suck your nipples because that feels good to you then go for it. You can, as another commenter said, give him a handjob or bj too. Keep in mind that anything sexual you do that involves his penis is going to end up being broadcast to his friends because guys are really insecure at that age and are obsessed with getting "points on the board" as it were. You're not a bad girl if you blow or stroke him, let him feel you up or eat you or lick your nipples, but the matter could come up later due to America's really screwed up sexual attitudes. So be aware of what you're dealing with. Everything has consequences.
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I wrote a sad story to my girlfriend and she loved it and she started crying. What can I do to comfort her ? (link)
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Here is how you relate to women, dude:
What they want more than anything else is the idea that you understand what they feel. So you don't have to "solve the problem" as such, you just need to basically repeat what is saddening her in your own words. Try to hear not just the words she is saying, but the controlling idea that underlies them. You can also tell her that the compassion she is showing for the protagonist (or whoever is getting crushed by the story's circumstances) in the story is one of the best things about her. That validates her feelings and will make her feel closer to you.
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so i liked this guy for a while. not a big crush, but he was freakin' amazing.. then my bestfriend started liking him, and eventually they went out. So they jut broke up.. and i'm over him now, and started liking someone else who i've had feelings for, but not exactly liked since i was in first grade. and guess what.. she likes him now! and asked him who he liked.. and he said her and not me. So what do i do? :( (link)
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People become friends often because they have a similar outlook on things, including who they like in possible mates. I think what you're dealing with is mere coincidence plus the tendency for women to feel competitive with each other.
Look, we can't always have what we want. Meet more guys and you will find somebody you like and who likes you. Don't get so invested in one guy to the exclusion of everything else because you forfeit a lot of possibilities by doing that. In fact, I bet that there is a guy right now who thinks you're so cool that it intimidates him to approach you. So put yourself out there, be friendly (though not a doormat) and enjoy life.
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Im a boy, 18 years old, about to graduate high school.
for some reason, lately, everything just seems dark to me. Like i feel uninterested in everything and apathetic. I dont repond to my friends much, and dont hangout much anymore, and i always just feel like being alone and i dont wanna do anything.
Thing is, im currently trying to heal from a heartbreak, and now im missing out on prom, and HS is ending and its kinda sad and everything seems so dark around me. Do i have a problem?
And its not just high school, its everything. Im worried about EVERYTHING. My parents, my college, my money, job, etc. ANd i just feel like going to sleep forever and just lazy around.
I feel like there is nothing to look forward to anymore. What s my deal? Help? (link)
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The problem is that kids your age are very present oriented. That is because you're emotionally and intellectually immature (the brain will keep developing until about age 25). Being moody and having times where you feel apathetic is natural to teenagers, so no surprise there. You will get past it. It's just a phase. Try to begin looking forward to college and keep your life simple and as free of drama as possible by having a sense of proportion and learning as much as you can.
Believe me, compared to high school, college freaking rocks! Yeah, it's a lot of work, but you will grow, learn and experience so much you will come out of it with an entirely new outlook.
Then once you graduate from university, go live overseas for a while. It's another great growing experience and looks good on a resume. Good luck!
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so i've had on & off crushes on this boy but never really thought about liking him because he dated one of my close friends a few years ago. but now i found out that he likes me! i'm not sure of how i feel because everyone knows that another one of my friends has basically been in-love with him for years and has put up with everything that he's done. he's basically the mr. right for me because he understands my problems and has the qualities of a guy that i like and there's really no one else like him. i'm sure that i could really like him but i don't know if i should because my friend has liked him for so long and i don't want to seem like i'm stealing him away. in the past, they have liked each other but the timing is always wrong or something because they've never gotten together so i feel like i'd just get in the way of her happiness. Should I allow myself to really like him back and tell him?! I'm afraid he won't wait forever and i'll lose my chance...but I don't want to lose my other friend. Please help! we have a vibe together but i think they would look good together as well. And i'm the type of person who would always let the friend get the guy but in the past, this just made me extremely sad because I had to distance myself from the guy so my friend could have him and in the end, no one was happy because they didn't even get together. (link)
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This is tricky. Which do you value more, your friendship with the girl or your future relationship with the guy?
Women are very competitive with each other and this can have some negative outcomes. If she perceives that you "took him away" from her then your friendship is likely to end. She also "puts up with him" because women often like guys who treat then like crap (the reason for that is that it makes a guy seem more like an alpha male and not a wussy who is needy and desperately plays up to girls). The fact that he kinda puts her through changes really isn't a consideration here.
In addition, you're young. There is plenty of time for you guys to hook up once the current relationship is binned. Plus you may meet someone even better in the meantime. Also keep in mind that any relationship you are having whilst in high school is probably not going to end up in marriage. By the time you hit 25, your thinking, attitudes and preferences are going to evolve in a different direction than they are currently in.
Therefore, there is no need to make hasty decisions here. Relax, think about this clearly and simply and then move forward.
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