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My friend is in love with my crush who likes me!
so i've had on & off crushes on this boy but never really thought about liking him because he dated one of my close friends a few years ago. but now i found out that he likes me! i'm not sure of how i feel because everyone knows that another one of my friends has basically been in-love with him for years and has put up with everything that he's done. he's basically the mr. right for me because he understands my problems and has the qualities of a guy that i like and there's really no one else like him. i'm sure that i could really like him but i don't know if i should because my friend has liked him for so long and i don't want to seem like i'm stealing him away. in the past, they have liked each other but the timing is always wrong or something because they've never gotten together so i feel like i'd just get in the way of her happiness. Should I allow myself to really like him back and tell him?! I'm afraid he won't wait forever and i'll lose my chance...but I don't want to lose my other friend. Please help! we have a vibe together but i think they would look good together as well. And i'm the type of person who would always let the friend get the guy but in the past, this just made me extremely sad because I had to distance myself from the guy so my friend could have him and in the end, no one was happy because they didn't even get together.
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This is tricky. Which do you value more, your friendship with the girl or your future relationship with the guy?
Women are very competitive with each other and this can have some negative outcomes. If she perceives that you "took him away" from her then your friendship is likely to end. She also "puts up with him" because women often like guys who treat then like crap (the reason for that is that it makes a guy seem more like an alpha male and not a wussy who is needy and desperately plays up to girls). The fact that he kinda puts her through changes really isn't a consideration here.
In addition, you're young. There is plenty of time for you guys to hook up once the current relationship is binned. Plus you may meet someone even better in the meantime. Also keep in mind that any relationship you are having whilst in high school is probably not going to end up in marriage. By the time you hit 25, your thinking, attitudes and preferences are going to evolve in a different direction than they are currently in.
Therefore, there is no need to make hasty decisions here. Relax, think about this clearly and simply and then move forward.
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explain whats going on to her and tlk to her about it and basically tell her what you tld us that you dont want it to seem like u are stealing him she will understand if she is really your friend
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