Hey y'all. I started this whole advice thing cuz i absolutely luv people and giving advice. I'll try to help the best I can with whatever problem you have. I've been through a little of everything so ask away and don't be shy!
E-mail: e.sherhart@comcast.net
Gender: Female
Location: TEXAS!!!
Occupation: Violinist
Age: 16
AIM: rikatree2375
Member Since: July 29, 2005
Answers: 255
Last Update: September 12, 2006
Visitors: 16321
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DeeSireDiOr
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I have a friend, well he's actually a sisters friend, but I would also consider him my friend and I'm sure he would do the same. He's in 9th grade and I'm in 10th. One day while we were out we were on the topic of God and he said he didnt believe in God. He says he thinks Jesus existed but that he was just a normal guy. He said if God existed then he wouldn't have diabetes.
Now I want to educate him about God and help him accept him into his life. I feel it is my duty as a Christian to guide him to a better life with God, because you are supposed to help the people who don't believe. He is a really sweet boy, and I told him that I was going to teach him and he said "you can try but it won't happen" so if he said I could try I'm going to make every effort too!
My problem is I don't know how to approach it. How should I start off with this teaching and showing? I've considered asking my pastor but I decided to come here first. Thanks for any help! (link)
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First of all, it's great that he said you can try to teach him. Use that as encouragement for yourself because alot of people just don't want to hear it.
I'm a Christian too if you're wondering. I think to get through to this guy, you first have to get him to believe that Jesus didn't give him diabetes. That everything happens for a purpose, rather good or bad and everybody has to go through bad times. I think if you can get that across you can start talking more about God's grace and his saving power. But don't over pressure this guy, ya know? Take things slow so you dont run him away. Also, it's a great idea to talk to your pastor or to your youth pastor if you have one. They could probably get you some books on this and some stuff to give to him. I know my church buys stuff for their youth to give to friends so that's a great resource. Well, just read through all that advice and hopefully it makes sense. Good luck and God bless ya!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Well i have a friend who i have known since second grade... and well i found out that he liked this girl and i dont know why but i didnt like it and i realized that i like him.. and now latly it seems like shes been trying to steal him from me and like he now like ignores me and talks to her.. and one time he was talking to me and he saw her and went running over to her and didnt say bye to me or talk to me the rest of the night.. and she gives me dirty looks and like i hate her.. is it not right that i hate her? or is it ok to? (link)
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I don't think it's right to hate anybody, but that's just me. I know it's hard to fight over a guy with your friend, but is it worth it??? Ask yourself this, would you rather save a friendship or gain a guy??? Sounds like you haven't even talked to her about this. If she's mature enough at all, she'll be willing to sit down and talk about what's going on. If this guy ends up liking you, don't rub it in her face. But if i were you, don't let this guy come between y'all. It's not fair to the both of you.
4Him, Disciple
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Well recently i got about 3 tattoo's and im 14. All of my friends got them too. i live with my mom and she was completly okay with them. Somehow, my dad found out about them. He foundout the name of the guy who did them, and where he lives. He told me he was going to have him arrested. If i am ever the reason somebody gets sent to jail i dont know what i would do. i feel so bad i just wanna die! what should i do!? (link)
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You can't exactly take back what you did so first of all, stop blaming yourself. It's not like the guy HAD to do the tattoes. And maybe your dad's threat was just because he was angry and didn't know how to react. Let him cool off for a few days. Maybe dont even bring it up unless he wants to talk about it. And besides, i doubt you can go to prison for doing tattoes. Not sure, but that sounds kinda stupid to me. So don't worry and let things play out. Hope i helped!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Ok, my name is Adrianna and i'm fifteen. And I (Obviously) need some help. See, people at my school think i'm a poser. And it really pisses me off. Because I have NEVER talked to any of the people that call me it. So they base it all on the way I dress. Call me crazy but, I have always bought things based on if I liked them or not. So I shop everywhere. Hot topic, Abercrombie and Fitch, JCPennys, hell even the thrift store if I really like it. So like, I want people to understand that i'm not trying to be something, i'm not trying to be a "Punk" or a "Prep" I could honestly give a shit less. I understand that not everyone is going to like you but, it really upsets me that people don't like me based on the clothes I wear. I don't know what to do. I want these people to just stop.
Ugh, I know this is stupid and cliched. So bear with me. (link)
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Sounds like these people are way jealous of you. If they dont even KNOW you and are giving you a hard time, then they're jealous. They'll stop if you totally ignore them and don't let it piss you off. Just walk past and maybe even smile. That'll get them quiet if nothing will. Keep shopping at the same places and just be you. If they dont like it, then that's their problem. Still sounds like they're jealous, maybe see that as a compliment. Hope i helped.
4Him, Disciple
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Alright I have been battaling eating dissorders for about 2 years now.. but i have thought i was fat sense i was about 7.. I thought i was done with the whole problem until i just made myself puke.. It would help if I just had someone to talk to =/ Im not sure what to do. Im not going to tell my parents or any adults or anything cause ill go to a hospital! please help me! (link)
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I think the first thing you have to do is stop telling yourself that you're fat. Beating yourself up about how you THINK you look is really not going to help. I've battled stuff like anorexia so i know a little of what you're going through. Once i stopped telling myself crap i got better. And bulimia is even worse in my opinion. You're damaging your body because you're removing nutrients that you need basically to stay alive. It can cause serious weight loss too. I'm not going to tell you to tell your parents because all my friends did that and it just annoyed me. I even went to a counselor and that did no good. So first of all, stop making yourself throw up. Just tell yourself that it's going to hurt you more than help you. Second of all, find some really close friends to talk to. I know us kids can only do so much but at least you can blow off some steam. But if you don't stop this, it'll get worse. It's like a habit that you can't get rid of. So for now, concentrate on slowly getting better and not WORSE. You can talk to me on my sn which is rikatree2375 or DeeSireDiOr is awesome too. She understands a lot. My email is e.sherhart@att.net for if i'm not on and you just need to talk. I hope i helped and please contact me somehow. I'm great at listening and i totally understand what you're going through.
4Him, Disciple
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ok i have this friend. (see title)
anyways we think of e/o as bff and all, but some days, idk she seems kind of ticked. like i say something and she doesnt really respond and i'll ask her whats wrong and she will freak out.
Say we are sitting in math(our first clas togeter) and we both dont say anything. then i say something like 'wow the day is going by fast' or 'did you hear about mr. jo's pop quiz?' and she wont respond, she just sits there. then i ask her whats wrong and she goes: NOTHING! I Am Just Tired! in a real annoyed voice.
what do i do? please hurry i rate high! (link)
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Here's a hint, usually when people say they're just tired, it's the only exscuse that pops into their mind that would make sense. I say this alot to my family and specially my sister because she's always asking me what's wrong. Try not bothering her by asking. If she wants to act like crap and not say anything, then let her. She'll eventually get over herself. I know that sounds mean but people get moody sometimes, i should know!!! If it continues, there might be something she's holding in so you might want to be really sensitive towards that. If it gets worse, then start to question. But for now, give her some space and she should get better. Hope i helped!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Okay, I am a catholic and christian. Have been for my whole life. I go to church every sunday, and pray every once in a while, not as much as I should. I do believe in Jesus Christ and have strong faith, but lately I have become obsessed with exorcism rituals, paranormal, and OBE's(out of body experience rituals) I have tried many times to have them and they actually work. Sometimes I feel like something is trying to enter my body when I do this, but before hand I come out of it like Im fighting it off.. I am scared that I could possibly one day become possesed myself. After I saw the movie The exorcism of Emily Rose it really made me intrested...so I am asking is this wrong and what can I do to stop this before I get deeper in? (link)
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Okay i'm going to be honest with you because i'm a Christian and i have a friend who's gotten into literally talking with demons (what you're interested in communicating with) and now she totally regrets it. When you do these rituals you are literally inviting these demons inside of you. Since you're a Christian, Satan literally hates you because you have Jesus Christ inside of you. So he's going to do as much as he can to through you off in your faith and that includes getting you interested in these rituals and stuff. The reason they work is because this is REAL. Just as Jesus and His angels are real, so is Satan and his demons. If you continue to talk and communicate with these things then they will really mess you up. I dont want to scare you and say you'll get possessed but these things will be INSIDE of you just like Christ is right now. I'm glad you realize that Jesus doesn't want you doing this because it's wrong!!! The reason you're fighting this off automatically is because He's literally protecting you. But God does NOT approve of spiritually demonic rituals, communication, or anything of the sort. He literally condemns it all throughout the Bible. Try reading the Bible for yourself and see what God has to say. But these thoughts are coming back because you've already taken the first step or trying to do things unnatural. I'd advice you to stop immediately so things dont get worse. Keep praying to God and He won't abandon you at all. I'm also wondering if you're scared of this, why the movie made you so interested. To me, that's abnormal. You don't want to be possessed, believe me.
4Him, Disciple
My sn is rikatree2375 and my email is e.sherhart@att.net if you need to talk about this some more. I seriously want to help you out on this.
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everytime i get a bf i tend to push him away like after a day or two i dont like him anymore
then when i lose him i want him back
why do i always do this why does this always happen (link)
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Personally, it sounds like either you're not ready for that kind of commitment or you just dont truly like the guy. Maybe get to know these guys a little better before you decide to date them. Find out if you really care about them in that kind of way. You might just need them more as friends then bf's. Take things slower with them and i'm sure they'll understand. Hope i helped ya!!!
4Him, Disciple
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heyyyy i was wondering Bout something.
well i'm a guy and our school has like a dance comign up. and well i think i'm supposed to ask this certain girl but i don't really want to go to the dance at all. and i'm scared if i don't ask her it'l like ruin ehr wholeee experience, cause she has like a lot of sisters who all had like "perfect fairy tale" dances and all. sooo i don't really wanna ask.. but i don't wanna ruin it for her.
help! (link)
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Okay, i'll give you two options here.
1) Ask her out and suffer through the night.
2) Don't ask her out and risk getting hurt. Just kidding!!!
Your first option will make her really happy but chances are she'll realize you're not having fun at the dance and she'll start to wonder. Your second option might hurt y'alls relationship BUT you could also do something more special with her on the night of the dance. Like nice dinner and a walk in the park or something like that. Maybe you could even talk to her and mention all this. I'm sure she'd understand. Also remember that sometimes you have to give and take a little, you know??? You both have to make efforts to keep each other happy. So for now, just talk to her and if she still wants to go to the dance, maybe it wouldn't be that bad. But try to comprise, okay??? I soo hope i helped you with that. Good luck!!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Alright. I like this guy. Today he told me that he wanted a gf. we are pretty good friends. I wanna tell him how i feel about him. Any suggestions on how i should approach him?
~*Michele~* (link)
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Usually the best way is to just open up and be honest. Depends if you know for sure if the guy is mature enough but it sounds like it since he wants a gf. If i were you, i'd try dropping major hints and if he doesnt get it, just tell him. Later he'll probably thank you for letting him know lol. You could also just let him make the first move. Takes patience, i know, but that can work really well too. Just take it step by step and it'll work out all in time. Hope i helped!!!
4Him, Disciple
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my bf just broke up wiht me, and i am throwing up cuz of it, and i also can't breath wen im crying. what can i do to help? (link)
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I'm so sorry first of all. Let me say though, throwing up isn't going to help and it's just gonna make you feel worse. Have you talked to your close friends about this? I know they could help a lot. But remember, there are soo many guys out there. I know it's super hard being dumped but you just gotta get back up and get going again. I'm sure a ton of guys would be lucky to have you. Just remember that and know that he's not the last one!!! Feel better!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Ok so here it goes!!!! Today was registration at school! i was new 2 the place. I was aproached by another student.He was so cute so we was sitting down talking for ages!!! and the next thing i know we was the last 2 left in the room and it was time for me to register and he was going to afterwards. I think i fancy him but im not sure if he likes me i feel stupid because ive just met the guy! well he was only speeking 2 me no one else. Thing is hes in none of my classes!! just the school. will i see him again!! he never said bye 2 me because i came out before him...then i just went. ive never felt like i felt a connection with him! someone please help. (link)
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Wow, love at first site, sounds great. I'll be honest, it's super hard to get together without any classes BUT there are ways to make it work. Specially if you go to a bigger school. Get his email or sn. Try to get together at like dances, football games, or anything y'all are interested in because it really sounds like he's interested. So just keep in touch and who knows what will happen. Hope i helped!!!
4Him, Disciple
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i have a friend . he isnt like my tightest friend, but anyways, we hooked up a few times and i admit it was fun. but, he isnt the commitment type of guy. i told myself thats it no more with this guy, but it seems in the moment when he makes a move, i return it back and we end up hooking up. i think its because i still like him, but i want to resist hooking up with him next time because its always the same thing. good fun, but its like he uses me and thats not a good feeling. anny tips on how i can really put my foot down and end this? (link)
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If i were you, i'd try hanging around some other guys. Dont totally blow this guy off but get to know some other people. If it helps, talk to him about the way you feel and that you need more of a relationship. He should understand and either try to be that for you, or let you look for someone else. Even if it's tempting, just tell yourself that there are better guys out there for ya. Don't give up and keep looking!!!
4Him, Disciple
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Okay, here's the deal. I'm satisfied with my appearance. I'm down to the weight that I want to be. I've been told that I'm pretty before by my friends. ... But guys never approach me or anything. I've been told that I'm shy as well, and I try to take that into consideration, but I'm not sure what's wrong with me. I'm in eighth grade and I've never had a boyfriend. Please help. I give fives. (link)
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I think you answered your own question. At your age, being shy is hard. It's difficult to really get to know guys. They're usually intimidated by girls especially if you dont talk up much. But being shy is good too, so dont get me wrong here. I doubt there's anything wrong with you but give the guys some time. Once they mature a little more they'll open up and all you'll have to do is respond and flirt like crazy!!! Sometimes the longer you wait, the better guy you get.
4Him, Disciple
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There is a boy I have REALLY liked. He told me he liked this other girl the other day but then after that he asked me if I still liked him. Well, today he asked me if i was going to the parade or the dance on friday. Usually thats not like him to ask me where I'm going. But anyways I siad the parade and he said "sweet me too"..do you think he likes me or what? i dont know whats going on..help me please! Ill rate 5's for everything except dumbass answers! (link)
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Sounds like the guy is starting to get interested. But if he keeps mentioning another girl either he's trying to see how that effects you or he might be telling the truth. If he keeps on asking you where you're going then he's interested. If i were you, i would just take things slow and let him make things happen. Hope i helped!!!
4Him, Disciple
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I really liked my boyfriend, but I just started school and everything, and I kind of want to see whats out there. I really don't want to dump my boyfriend, but I still wanna like fish around I guess. Its a new school year and I want to make the best of it. I am not really sure what to do. I don't mean to sound like I am using my boyfriend or anything. If you could help it would be appreciated. Thanks a ton, (link)
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Are you sure you want to give up your boyfriend to look around? I mean, depends on how much you really like him. If you have a serious relationship then i don't think you should give it up. But if it's not that serious, then just start looking around but nothing too much. And if you really get interested in somebody else, just be honest with him. But dont give him the impression you're cheating on him. Hope i helped and good luck!!!
4Him, Disciple
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hey i read your advice and i can't believe you're ana! that's not really that good for you
anyways i think i might have an eating disorder but it's not anorexia. sometimes i get soooo stressed out and all i don't even feel like eating. when there's so much to do, i just close up and refuse to eat even if i'm hungry. it's like i enjoy forcing myself to not eat. i do'nt think i'm fat or anything i'm just depriving myself of food sometimes.
oh yeah don't your parents care if you're not eating? do you eat lunch at school? (link)
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I'm sorry that my problem might have hurt you. It's not all that serious because i'm pretty much used to it. But i'm still me. Anyways, i really understand you being stressed out. And i totally get where you're coming from. In your case if you're not doing it like because you're weight conscious then you don't have to worry as much. If you start to close up then talk yourself out of it. Anorexia is just as much mental as physical. It starts basically with how you think and perceive things. Sometimes if you blame yourself for past events you'll "punish" yourself by not eating but i'm not sure if you have that. I enjoy it sometimes too but that's not why i do it. Just try to calm down and stop stressing. Tell yourself to EAT so you dont end up with anorexia because it's hard to get rid of once it's there. Don't let it get serious though. If it does, try telling somebody closer to you who can help probably more than i am. Just dont worry, relax and eat. I'm sure you'll be fine. Hope i helped and good luck!!!
4Him, Disciple (w/b and tell me how it's going!!!)
OH!!! my parents dont really know...they refused to listen a year ago so i doubt they would care now...but thank you.
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Sorry this is soo long.
Ok soo i live with my dad 9 months out of tyhe year ad i really miss my mom. Well i just got back today frm visting her and my dad picks me up at the airport, we get home the house is a complete pig stie like theres his cloths everywere and there liek ants of the counters and the only clean rpoom is his. Rigth after he drops us off( not seeing us for 4 weeks) he leaves and gose to work. He self employed soo like its not like he has a boss telling him- oyur fired- hes the boss! ok sooo also he went out ot party tonite and left us with our aunt!! now am i the wrong one for being kind of mad andsad, likei miss my mom soo much, nd the only thing holding her back from coming here is the money for mthe divorce, she said once he agreess on a price thta i actually acurate which he thinks is too high she bee out here in 5 mis. Now im really buggign my dad ot just give my mom what he owes her, and he slams nad locks his dorr to his room, im starving but im scared ot eat the food b/c of the ants! am i rong for feeling this way, i just had a 8 hours plane ride- boston to las vegas got home and he leaves! withmy mom i feel loved but eith my dad i feel as thought the only reason he has us is ot prove a point ot my mom. I love thme both reallly alot, but i just think me and my sister should be with my mom not my dad. Please i just dnt no i miss my mom and i just dont think i can put up with living with him anymre!! (link)
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I'm sooo sorry you're going through this, but have you seriously talked to your dad about this??? Like maybe sit him down and just express what you're feeling and show him what you mean. Tell him it's not fair to you and your sister that you have to live in crap daily. Maybe even talk to your mom about your living conditions if you haven't already. Try to think of ways to get some extra cash so you can go back to live with her. Just be honest with your dad and if that doesn't work, get back with your mom and refuse to move back with your dad. Hope i helped and good luck!!!
4Him, Disciple
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i REALLY need help on this 1!!! im new at this advice thingy and i want to give great advice! how do i give good/great advice????
PLZ help me!!!! *i will rate high on good answers! :)*
from,
stuck in it! (link)
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Basically, tell them how it is. Be honest and get to the point. Don't tell people what they wanna hear, tell them what they NEED to hear, and yes there's a difference. Be nice but upfront. As long as you're respectful and smart you should be fine on here. But stop worrying soo much about it!!! Well, hope i helped ya!!!
4Him, Disciple
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I'm 13/f, I really like this guy, and I'm in the 7th grade. He's really cute and he's really fun to talk to and he's really nice and I could make a whole list of great things about him, but that would take a long time and wouldn't make much of a difference anyhow. We used to be good friends, but over the summer he went away and I didn't get to stay in touch with him. Now, he's still nice and we still IM and talk sometimes and all, but he just doesn't seem interested and has sort of backed down. He talks and flirts with other girls, and I know that that's not something to be really mad about, but I just can't help but be really pissed off whenever he's having fun with another girl, or talking and walking alone with another girl. And I'm too embarassed to talk to him as much, and he's in only 1 of my classes (Grrr). What can I do to build back friendship again, how can I approach him without blushing, how can I get him to notice me more? I know this is really long, and I'm only 13, and this seems like a dumb question compared to what's happening to people dying in New Orleans and people trying to live in leaky football stadiums in New Orleans but I really need help!!! (link)
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If you want your friendship back, then really start talking to him again. Start conversations and get back in touch basically. The closer you can get to him, the better your chances will be. If you're shy, then maybe go and talk to him around your other friends and they can support you. Just start talking again and flirt alot. The guy won't back off then. Hope i helped and good luck!!!
4Him, Disciple
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