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My daughter is a Junior in HS and she is dating a freshman. I really don't have a problem with it but most of her friends are freshman also and my husband does not like it at all! My husband thinks she should be hanging out with other teenagers her age with the same goals (looking at colleges, soccer, etc). I'm not so sure. I tend to think hubby is more concerned with the way it looks. I figure if she is happy and they are good kids then it's okay.
She says the kids her age are not nice. She tends to hang out with others where she can be the leader of the pack. I think she feels more confidence with the younger crowd.
My husband wants her to cut it off with this boy. She wants to go to prom with him. I'm thinking it's okay. What do you think? (link)
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There's nothing wrong with having younger friends. I was actually the exact opposite in high school, and all my friends were older, until I got to about Junior year and all my friends ended up younger. Now they're all older again (I'm 25 and they're all 30-40 something).
There's a lot to be said about maturity, and people in high school are all maturing at different paces. It's more fun to be the leader of the younger classmen anyway. They'll do anything for you just because you're a couple years older. It's like having an empire!
Your hubby sounds like he's concerned about the appearance, which isn't uncommon. It does sound weird on the surface, but if she were the freshman hanging out with Juniors, I'm sure he wouldn't mind. You should sit him down and explain to him that you don't want to dictate your daughter's life... because that causes rebellion... and if she comes home pierced, tattooed, high, and pregnant because you made her give up something that made her happy, it's on him.
Chances are that she wouldn't do any of that, but she WOULD think of something.
She's got two years left, and then she'll be a freshman in college all over again, and that is WAY scarier than high school ever was. It's better that she gain some social confidence now while she can, or college is going to eat her alive.
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I'm a sociopath and psychopath and I have always yearned to feel human. In fact, it's my dream to have genuine human emotions. I'm tired of feeling indifferent and apathetic. I want to feel something for once. How can I do this? (link)
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The sad, honest truth is that if your diagnosis is sociopathy and psychopathy, you're never going to properly feel what people feel. It's out of your reach. Don't feel bad. I'm pretty devoid of the ability to empathize with people. I hear it's an interesting experience, emotional and whatnot... but I'm never going to get there.
There are, however, a number of studies indicating that talk-therapy can be helpful in some cases where a person is actively trying to alter their perceptions. In your case, you would be actively trying to conceive emotion, and the want makes the potential more probable. For that, you would want to see a psychologist (not a psychiatrist).
Personally, my diagnosis has evolved over the years, and none of my three shrinks can really explain how one goes from one disorder to another... but my progression from one to another should give you a semblance of hope. While there isn't really a cure for this sort of thing, there's always a chance for evolution.
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18/f Now this may seem weird to most people but I don't like sunny weather at all. The thing is that whenever the sun is out I get really depressed and sad. At the beginning of spring I sometimes start crying for no reason, because I feel so uncomfortable. Then after a while I get used to the sun but I still don't like it.
I suppose I'm not the only one who dislikes sunny weather but why do I get so extremely depressed?
I just can't stand feeling so sad :( The sun is shining again today and I'm sitting here nearly crying .. what is wrong with me? And please don't make fun of me ._. (link)
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It's not uncommon for people to respond to the weather. The most well-known is the sadness people get during the rainy seasons, but it's not the only reaction.
I'm not terribly fond of sun, either. I enjoy rain, and overcast... but I live in a state with 300 days of sun. It's a thing.
Usually these reactions are caused from pre-existing conditions... depression, bipolar disorder, etc... but a lot of the time they're just chemical imbalances in the body. A reaction to sunlight would indicate a problem with vitamin D.
You could go see a doctor to see if you're D deficient... or you could just start taking a multi-vitamin. I recommend the vitamin, personally. Doctors always find something wrong with you...
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I was dating this guy R for almost two years and almost a year back we had our first serious break up. I started seeing this guy J after that for a week after which I got back with R. Now, a few months back R and I broke up again and I repeated the mistake of going back to J. We had a "fairytale" relationship but after a week or so R came back to me and we started dating again. I told J everything and he stopped talking to me. Things turned a little nasty between me and J. MY boyfriend R treats me horribly still I chose to be with him because I love him a lot. So I have finally decided to end it for good with R. I miss J terribly right now and no I dont mean it in a rebound way. I miss him because he was my best friend and no one ever treated me the way he did. The last time J and I spoke, I hurled a lot of abuses at him (even though it was my fault). I want to apologize to him and get back with him but I'm scared because his friends wont let him talk to me (I think). Plz help!! (link)
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You're not gonna get J back.
It's harsh, it's horrible, and it's true. People have a threshold for the things they will put up with, and you crossed his. If you hadn't he's still be around.
Now, you can, of course, try to contact him and see what he says. Chances are that he's not going to scream at you or call you c*nt or something, but things are NEVER EVER going to be what they were. And, in truth, reaching out to him after hurting him like that will probably just hurt him again.
People screw up. You screwed up. You can't always fix things like that... but you CAN learn from them.
If I were you, and you really want to contact J, you should, but you need to say something like, "I was thinking about you and I regret what happened. I just wanted to tell you that I realized my mistake, even if it was too late, and I'm leaving R for good. I know that we can never be like we were, and that it's my fault, but if you ever wanted to get together for (insert dinner, drinks, whatever here) I would love to see you."
Then... regardless of what he does with that, you have to move on with your life. I recommend being single for a little while... which is scary and awful... for like the first month. You need to figure yourself out, and while it's uncomfortable to do, it's rewarding as hell.
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why is every one beating me or pushing me a locker or saying im emo because i like black and red and listen to bvb (link)
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Probably because you look emo, listen to Black Veil Brides, and kids are assholes. Also, goth went out in the early 2000s, so the default is emo, now... I was a goth back then.
Look, I would love to tell you that life gets easier, that people get less judgy, that you grow up.... but you don't. What you do get is the opportunity to not give a damn.
I don't really condone violence, but next time someone shoves you into a locker or tries to raise a hand at you... hit them back. In the face. It sounds awful, and wrong, but sometimes you have to hit back. You can't just take their shit, or it will never end.
Don't change who you are. Just remember you have a spine and don't let people push you around.
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My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years. He is my everything, my rock, my supporter, and my best friend. We click perfectly. I can never cease being myself around him, even when I haven't showered and smell...haha. He does a lot for me, even paying for my college funds I don't have the money or time for. He provides me with so much support and gives me confidence and understanding. We're like best friends, and it feels like I could never get tired of him, even when he aggravates me. We fight, but only little arguments. I am definitely a handful, but he hasn't quit on me yet. He has a steady job (but no car...), and we share a lot of common interests in videogames, tv shows, music, and life itself. We plan to marry after college.
I started college Monday, August 19th. Classes were fun, but I lack friends and seem to only be able to talk casually and comfortably with guys, never girls. I don't know what it is, but I have a very hard time conversing with girls. I feel judged or nervous. I made a friend at the college bookstore today. His name is Anthony. We chatted for hours, and he sparked a lot of my interests and we shared a lot of common hobbies and likes. Anthony really caused quite a stir in my stomach. I developed a lot of butterflies and nervousness when I was around him. I wanted to know everything about him, and I developed a huge crush on him after a few hours of chatting face to face. He got my number and we started texting in a friendly manner.
This situation has happened before, where I fall for another while I am still with my boyfriend. We got through it and continue to get through it, since I can't ever seem to stop flirting. It's not sexual, I just get bored and lonely sometimes when my boyfriend is busy. I feel like a bad person, a really bad one. My boyfriend and I are absolutely perfect for each other, and every time I think about being without him, I cry. I can't fix this. I have talked to other guys before and flirted like this before several times. I love my boyfriend, but not as much as I thought if I keep doing this. I am 18, and he is 19...and Anthony is 28, which my parents would never approve. I can't shake Anthony out of my head, and when my boyfriend texts me, I get sad it's not Anthony. My boyfriend and I have drifted apart in my eyes, I just don't feel any interest now. I am such a bad girlfriend...someone please help me. I don't want to have another problem when this relationship is so perfect... (link)
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A, the grass is never actually greener on the other side...
2, If you're not happy with your boy, it's best to drop him so he can get over it, instead of stringing him along because you're scared of losing a good thing to take a chance.
D, a 28 year old, probably not interested in you as anything more than a one night stand... The age difference matters more than younger people want to admit it does.
With all of that in mind... I think you should let your boyfriend go, so he can find someone that's actually right for him, and you should just be single a while. Sleep around, if you like. Nothing wrong with that. Date around, if you're not into sleeping around. Live. You're 18... you don't even know what life's got in store for you.
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Im 18/f and I've been dating my boyfriend who's 21 for 4 years now he's rude and selfish and I've been forced to live with him for two years cuz I have.no family where we live. I've recently been cheating on him and I confessed to him and he forgave me because I forgave him in the past and to be fairly honest I did not want him to forgive me. I want to be with the other guy because he is the sweetest and most kindest man I've ever met. But my boyfriend treats me lime a five year old he needs to babysit and is smothering me I hate being around him but I feel guilty when I think about leaving how can I get out of this or make him leave me..hes so bad his own family doesnt come around (link)
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If you want to leave... then leave. You're not really being forced to stay with him. You can get an apartment same as anyone else and do whatever you want. Cheating to make him leave you is a bad idea... most of the time it doesn't work. You'd be astounded at how many people just forgive for fear of being alone. It's sad, really.
So... just leave. You're 18. You're an adult. Stop playing this like a game and just go. He will fend for himself and tread water like everyone else that gets dumped. It's not your problem.
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recently i got paranoid of losing my most interesting personality that i always had so how can i regain it any suggestions that might just help (link)
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The first thing you should know is that people change, and as a person you will change, too.
I feel like I'm a pretty interesting person, with a big personality. I always kind of have been, but once or twice I've lost sight of who I was. I got into this habit of picking things other people did up, because I wanted to fit with them, and more than once I couldn't tell you what made me... me.
One day, I sat down and just wrote down everything I loved about my big personality, what really made me myself. Then I hung that list on my bathroom mirror to look at everyday. I made sure to exemplify everything on that list everyday, including things I forgot I did... like my love of cussing. I really love the f-word... and I'd stopped saying it because someone told me that it was un-lady-like.
You are who you are, and no one can take that away from you, except you. Sometimes we all just need to be reminded of that.
So make yourself a list of everything that makes you the person you are... and just try to be that person the best you can. Everything else will fall in line and your paranoia will fade.
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Im 31 years old woman.my period was last month 14th of july.18th of july my husband do sex with me and next morning I take contracepetive pill.then 19th of july again my husband sex with me and I forget to take pill.now this month till 20th of august my period is not happened and im worried.i don't want to be pregenant so help me. (link)
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Well, first thing's first... take a pregnancy test. Available at your local grocery store.
That's the easiest and simplest test to see if you're pregnant, since nothing is really 100% on the preventative side.
If it comes up negative, you can just wait it out. Sometimes periods are late, or early, or absent. Things like your diet and any exercise you may be doing have a role to play in that, as well.
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I recently met a guy, we sort of clicked and we and sort of became friends.. Well not really, I'd say acquaintances. We've only hung out twice (the second time was a disaster).
He's asked me to hang out with him a few times, and I was busy and the last time he wanted to hang out. I said I had already plans but I'd hang out, if they changed and that I would get back to him later.
Which I didn't, and I forgot. And he hasn't texted me now in over 3 weeks. Grr, do you think he's pissed and doesn't want to hang out, and what should I do? (link)
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He's probably just written you off as a flake. You could potentially redeem yourself on that, assuming he gives you the time of day... Start with texting him, just to see if he answers. If he does, then you can hang out with him and attempt to make up for your mistake. If not, just find a new boy. There are so many in the world.
In related information, I blew this guy off for months... we're steady dating now. Apparently he didn't mind waiting. ^_^
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My boyfriend and I wanna move in with our friend Bob. Only problem is, bob has four dogs. This makes things complicated for moving because not a lot of places will accept that many dogs.
Also, we don't really wanna live with that many dogs. They're not the most potty trained and even if they were, someone would still have to clean up after them, and our friend bob is disabled so he'd probably ask one of us to do it, which we don't wanna do/don't think we should have too. Also obviously, 4 dougs=a lot of noise.
he's VERY attached to his dogs and doesn't wanna get rid of any of them. We don't want to give ultimatums but we feel like something needs to be said/done. We just don't know how to approach the problem without tons of drama or something worse.
Any advice on how to deal with this would be much appreciated...thanks! :) (link)
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I have four dogs, as it happens. If someone tried to get me to get rid of any of them, I would no longer speak to that person.
I tell you this, because you need to realize you can't do that to Bob. His dogs are his family and he will choose them over you any day of the week.
Just don't move in with him, if you have so many qualms about it. Three people living together is kind of hard, anyway... You'd be better off with you and your boyfriend living together in an apartment somewhere. You get privacy, only the pets you want, and there's no roomie to wake up with loud sex... or to bring home irritating girls... or eat all your food... etc.
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I didn't exactly know what category to put this in, but anyways. This guy I know that works at the same place I do is normally pretty chill and really cool. Now that he has a girlfriend I noticed that he has forgotten to do many different things at his job (little things such as forgetting to turn off the lights to the indoor pool off, forgetting to turn the hose outside off, etc.) Is he really that much preoccupied with his girlfriend? He doesn't even hang out and chill with me and my coworkers during work anymore either, instead he's constantly texting his girlfriend. What's the deal?? He's normally really relaxed and doesn't have a care in the world. It's like I don't even know him anymore, I mean I still want to be friends with him but he's pushing everyone away... (link)
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He's just smitten... which sounds retarded, and it kind of is, but it's not uncommon to become mildly obsessed when you're really into your new significant other. I've had friends totally disappear off the face of the planet over new relationships. One of two things will happen with this. 1, the relationship will go on and the shiny will wear off of it and he'll return to more or normal. 2, she will tear his heart out of his chest and he'll be crushed, but then return to normal. Either way, you just need to wait it out.
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i hav had sex many times.n nw my parents want tht i should get merried with other person.im tense coz im not able for it.if i get married hw can i make my hsbnd satisfied? (link)
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I'm assuming this is an arranged marriage? That's the only time I can think that parents have a say in your choices of spouse. At any rate, you needn't worry about satisfying your husband. Over time, people figure out how to please their partners, just from experience and time with them.
If you don't want to get married, though... I recommend not doing it.
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Hi there my cousin and i have been together for 6 yrs secretly we hve a 5 yr old daughter together and no one knows about it weve managed to keep it a secret this long but late last year she decided to end it recently saying she cant pretend anymore and alota people will get hurt if they found out i know shes my cousin but i just fell in love with her and even now im stil madly in love with her i havent seen or spoken to her in a month now and im heartbroken is it true u cant choose who u fall in love with? and i miss my daughter too and ive Also been told by people shes been seen with another guy this is just a very big mess at the moment i dont know what to do (link)
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Like any relationship, if it's over, it's over and you'll have to move on with your life. Whether she's your cousin or not, she's over it. Her prior relation to you really has no part to play in her continued want of you. There's nothing you can do about that. As for your daughter, if you want to see her, you need to go to court and get at least partial custody. This can be kind of tricky, though, since you fathered a child with your cousin. People are going to find out, and in some states this activity is illegal. I would contact a lawyer to view your options and potential repercussions in your area.
Heart ache sucks, and the cards you're handed in life, often, also suck. You just have to pick up your life and move on. Find happiness elsewhere.
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I am 25 and I am engaged. We already have a beautiful 8 months daughter. My fiance is always honest to me and tells me everything. Well I do the same except for one thing. My fiance knows that I was sexually abused when I was a kid. My mother had a boyfriend and she always let him take care of me and my sister when she was at work. She didn't know that her boyfriend was doing something to me like having sex with me (with clothes on). Thank God it didn't last long because they broke up. Another guy did the same to me. I never told anyone during that time. As a kid, I always thought that it was a game and that it will make them like or love me more.
I first had sex when I was 15. I'm a hopeless romantic person and I always wanted a perfect relationship. I thought that when I will have sex with a guy, it will make him love me more. But I was wrong. Most of the guys I like just left me. Until I met my fiance. He was perfect for me and he loves me so much. I love him so much too. We are 18 months together already. I told him that he's the 3rd guy I had sex with when he asked me about it. I lied. I already had sex with 16 guys from the age of 15 until now. He's the 16th guy. I feel bad that I'm lying to him. I never cheated on him. He's the last guy I had sex with. I'm thinking now wether to tell him the truth or just let it be. Help me decide. I feel so stupid that I let those guys get what they want. If I can bring back the past, I will choose to stay virgin until the day of my marriage. Thanks in advanced. (link)
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I don't really say this often, but this is one you should let go. You can't change the past, and telling your fiance you've been lying would dredge up a ton of stuff that you don't really need to deal with.
What happened in the past happened. I don't tell anyone how many guys I've slept with... because I lost count after like 30. So what? I had a slutty phase. It's over. My last boyfriend has only ever slept with 3 people... I'm number 3... I don't have any idea at all what number he is... 37? 45? I dunno. So I just didn't tell him.
It didn't make or break our relationship. If I'd told him, though... I think it would have really hurt what we had... or currently have.
In the long run, the past is the past and you can't change or even justify it most of the time. But it's your past and you don't have to tell anyone anything, not even your fiance. If he's the last man you ever sleep with, that's all he needs to know or care about. Everything else is... irrelivant.
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ok so my ex boyfriend wants me back and these other 2 guys like me which way do i go (link)
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Never move backwards... he's your ex for a reason.
Pick a new man and venture ever forward! If he doesn't work out, there will always be other men.
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how do you spank a child what position and what implemet (link)
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If you're going to spank, which is highly frowned upon by most people, be aware that you should not leave bruising, as you would then be in violation of many child abuse laws. THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT. YOU'RE PUNISHING YOUR CHILD, NOT BEATING THEM.
Spanking a child, most often, is done in a seated position with the child bent over your lap. As spanking is now a much frowned upon and punishable act, never under any circumstances use anything other than your hand to spank a child. Do not use excessive force, you're just trying to let them know they've crossed a line. Three times is sufficient and they should never be forced to remove pants or pull up skirts, etc.
Immediately after spanking your child, send them to their room, or somewhere free of distractions, and let them cry, as they will most assuredly cry. When they have calmed down and you have calmed down, too, it's important to "make up" with your child, talk about their transgression so they understand why they were punished and then do something nice together.
It's important to note that if you're going to use spanking as a disciplinary tool in your home that you must use it scarcely and only for the most awful of behavior. Overuse is not only unproductive, but can be construde as child abuse, which is taken very seriously across the board of "people that will take away your child faster than you can blink."
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Can you LEAP TALL BUILDINGS WITH A SINGLE BOUND or STOP BULLETS?
A little Conceded Are We? (link)
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While I cannot leap tall buildings in a sigle bound, I can stop a bullet... once... maybe twice. It really depends if the bullet hit a vital organ, artery or vein or if it just went straight through and did only minimal damage.
I would not consider myself to be conceded, at all. I would consider myself to be cofnident and happy with myself, instead. I can see, however, that such an opinion of one's self could be misread as conceit.
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So I was bored one day and I know this is immature and lying but me and my friend made up this screen name and instant messaged my boyfriend. Who is 5 years older, (20,25). He is very opened to talk to anyone so I brought me up. I was completely devastated and crushed when I read the things he had to say about me. He said that I was obsessed with him and liked him a lot more than he liked me. He wasnt sure about us because we had nothing in common when he always tells me when we talk he loves how we don't because we still work. He said that I am constantly looking to talk and he hates it. When he breaks up with me i am going to be devastated and he doesn't know how to do it. I told him a lot of personal stuff thats happened and he mocked me about it. He said he's embarrassed of me because I'm immature when he eggs me on to do things like that. I can't even explain how hurt and stupid I feel. I love him so much though and our relationship is serious. If i've ever wanted to break up with him it would be right now. I just don't know how to tell him over what. He would be really mad if he knew the truth. Should I even be mad about this? Ugh I'm so confused! any opinions or advice would be great!
Thanks in advance (: (link)
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You're entitled to be mad... but this little fishing expedition you did is going to tilt the scales a little bit... because really you shouldn't be snooping on your man like that...
That aside though... he sounds like a real jerk. If that's how he feels, you should just own up to being a snoop and tell him that if that's how he feels he can F-ck off. You don't need that static in your life.
Yeah, maybe he'll be mad you snooped... so what? Not your problem anymore.
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So, I have been with my boyfriend for a while now. I'm not planning on having a family anytime soon, since I decided 24+ would be the best time (done with my degree's and such). But my problem is I have 2 minds about it
on one hand I do want a family with him, I always get told I'd make a good mother and I don't doubt that I would be one (with enough reading and knowledge, etc.) but then I think of all the nasty parts! the labour is one thing, but then there's years of dirty diapers, sleepless nights, etc. etc.
I suppose I just want to know (from parents, women preferably) if it's worth it? Is it really as painful as it looks??(that seems like a dumb question haha)
and also, on a slightly more personal level: I do love my body, I was blessed to get the curves in the right places (not bragging lol)and I found out my mum was very similiar, but after 5 children, well, she lost it fast, though we were all pretty close together? Do you women with children manage to get your body back easily? does it ruin your vagina? (sorry but I just want to know, no need to answer that if your uncomfortable :) )
Thanks x
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I am not a mother... let me open with that. I know lots of people that have kids, though. I'm 24 and everyone seems to pop out kids these days. Personally, the concept of pregnancy scares the hell out of me... pregnancy and labor... and babies... not my thing...
I've seen women give birth... it looks awful. Here's the thing about childbirth, though. When you go into labor, your body releases a chemical that helps with pain and actually causes your to forget. Lots of women forget how painful labor was and it just becomes something of a dull memory.
Getting your body back after childbirth depends on a lot of factors... how much you gain during pregnancy, your genetic predisposition to being thin or heavy, how your body starts producing hormones after pregnancy... all sorts of things. I've seen peopel that gain a couple of pounds permanently, like my sister who went from size 0 to size 3... and I've seen girls that go right back tot heir normal weight... I've seen girls that never get it back. It all really depends.
Does it ruin your vagina... for a little while, anyway... When you give birth, your vagina tears (or the doctor cuts you) to make room for the head of your baby... they sew you up and give you a routine for caring for that particular wound... but once it's healed up you're not ruined. I'm unsure if you're necessarily THE SAME as before, but you're not RUINED.
All that said... you don't HAVE to give birth. You have other options for a family... I, for example, intend on adopting. Lots of babies all over the globe need a home and a family. You can also have a surrogate mother give birth for you, though that can be extremely expensive.
Right now, I have 3 dogs and a cat... and that's a decent family.
You're 18. You have plenty of time to figure out what you want and how to get it. I'm 24 and not thinking about family planning until I'm at least 28 or 30... My mom had me at 34... Don't rush yourself. Enjoy life. ^_^
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