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Been with my boyfriend for two years, but I am developing a massive crush
My boyfriend and I have been dating for two years. He is my everything, my rock, my supporter, and my best friend. We click perfectly. I can never cease being myself around him, even when I haven't showered and smell...haha. He does a lot for me, even paying for my college funds I don't have the money or time for. He provides me with so much support and gives me confidence and understanding. We're like best friends, and it feels like I could never get tired of him, even when he aggravates me. We fight, but only little arguments. I am definitely a handful, but he hasn't quit on me yet. He has a steady job (but no car...), and we share a lot of common interests in videogames, tv shows, music, and life itself. We plan to marry after college.
I started college Monday, August 19th. Classes were fun, but I lack friends and seem to only be able to talk casually and comfortably with guys, never girls. I don't know what it is, but I have a very hard time conversing with girls. I feel judged or nervous. I made a friend at the college bookstore today. His name is Anthony. We chatted for hours, and he sparked a lot of my interests and we shared a lot of common hobbies and likes. Anthony really caused quite a stir in my stomach. I developed a lot of butterflies and nervousness when I was around him. I wanted to know everything about him, and I developed a huge crush on him after a few hours of chatting face to face. He got my number and we started texting in a friendly manner.
This situation has happened before, where I fall for another while I am still with my boyfriend. We got through it and continue to get through it, since I can't ever seem to stop flirting. It's not sexual, I just get bored and lonely sometimes when my boyfriend is busy. I feel like a bad person, a really bad one. My boyfriend and I are absolutely perfect for each other, and every time I think about being without him, I cry. I can't fix this. I have talked to other guys before and flirted like this before several times. I love my boyfriend, but not as much as I thought if I keep doing this. I am 18, and he is 19...and Anthony is 28, which my parents would never approve. I can't shake Anthony out of my head, and when my boyfriend texts me, I get sad it's not Anthony. My boyfriend and I have drifted apart in my eyes, I just don't feel any interest now. I am such a bad girlfriend...someone please help me. I don't want to have another problem when this relationship is so perfect...
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Maybe give some free advice about: Love Life?
It's normal to have crushes when you're in a relationship, but it's obviously not good to act on those feelings.
So this is where you make a decision on what you really want. If you are truly unhappy with your boyfriend, then don't string him along.
If I was in your situation, I'd stop talking to Anthony for a little while, block his number for a little while and see how you're feeling about your boyfriend then. If you still want to be with him, then there you go, you're going to have to work through your problems. Like moving on from your crush and talking to him about the things that have been bothering you about what he's been doing.
I don't think you should act impulsively on your feelings. If you're still unsure about this after awhile, you should probably take a break from your boyfriend.
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It would seem you see the qualities in Anthony you wished your current boyfriend had. It not uncommon to feel a stranded from someone you love. You feel like you aren't on the same page anymore. Life after hs is very hard and it seems you have grown up and he hasn't. You aren't a bad girlfriend, you just want different things. I think that finding a man at college would be your best bet. You want someone succeeding with you, not lagging behind and making you feel guilty. You will always have your love, but its best to find someone on the same path or someone with goals for the future.
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A, the grass is never actually greener on the other side...
2, If you're not happy with your boy, it's best to drop him so he can get over it, instead of stringing him along because you're scared of losing a good thing to take a chance.
D, a 28 year old, probably not interested in you as anything more than a one night stand... The age difference matters more than younger people want to admit it does.
With all of that in mind... I think you should let your boyfriend go, so he can find someone that's actually right for him, and you should just be single a while. Sleep around, if you like. Nothing wrong with that. Date around, if you're not into sleeping around. Live. You're 18... you don't even know what life's got in store for you.
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