Member Since:
November 23, 2007Answers:
519Last Update:
July 8, 2014Visitors:
35369Favorite Columnists
xosodapopx3
JustJessOx
Jackieee
about

advice
I worry too much and very easily and i didnt touch around my entrance but up higher he was massaging just a small amount i wasnt touching myself on purpose or alot just to guide and ive been freaking out ever since, not that my period ia late but because i worry lol but both times any left over cum was dried defenitly
You didn't clarify what exactly happened. But by the sounds of it, you didn't get any cum in you, so you should not be pregnant - if that's what you're asking. Try not to worry cuz that can delay your period. Then Wait to see if your period comes, cuz it likely will.
hey, i am a columnist on here and i love helping people but now i need some help back. I've been involved with this guy over a year now, we happen to love each other. He redefined my perspective on love, on life, on MYSELF. He is... amazing.
But i live in a very strict old fashion christian family and i'm literally the only girl in my generation. My family doesn't even allow me to date and i'm EIGHTEEN!!!! Yeah... it's that bad.
But anyway... me and the guy were having sex... and he came in... not just a little bit. the full on throttle shot DEEP in there. i tried to wipe it out but idk if it did anything.
Now before you say where is the protection... talk to trojan. there condemn ripped... beautiful right?
But anyway whats my next move... i can't swallow pills (the morning after thing) and i could wait to c if i get my period but my body is wierd and i only get my period once every three-four months...
So what's my next move?
Simple straight-forward answer: use a pregnancy test! Just so you know, taking one right now will probably give you a false/questionable response, plus you say your periods are irregular, so what I would do is take a test in two weeks to confirm if you are pregnant or not BUT if you are really panicked right now, I would go and buy one asap! Just meaning your results may not be as accurate.. But by the sounds of it, honestly the odds could be that you are pregnant. Please don't stress until you know the fact though. As you may know, late periods can be caused by many things including stress and as I do not know when your next period is, please just breathe for now.
Also, I hope you talked to your guy about this. He needs to know, not necessarily now, but later once you've taken a pregnancy test.. whatever you do, do not try telling your parents about this right now. Wait until you've had a test and talked to your guy. If anything you should let your boyfriend know that you are worried about the condom breaking the other day and likely he will help calm you, as you've already said he is an amazing guy. I know what it's like to feel that connection with someone, so please talk to him and think about this together.. about the 'what ifs' - I'm sure he will understand. Discussing this calmly with him after the fact of a pregnancy test would likely be best... but either way, it needs to be done. So take a test, talk to your guy, then see where to go from there. If you need, feel free to inbox me to talk
can the vagina be stretched after years of inactivity age 73, recently remarried
Yes. It always can be
I am getting over the flu and this morning I took a shower and got a glass of tea, when I drank some of it, my stomach hurt. Is it because the tea was the first thing on my stomach? Everytime I have a sip my stomach hurts but it hurts less and less as I continue to drink. Thanks! :)
If you had the flu, your body is likely dehydrated so drinking water or tea is one of the better things for you actually. If your stomach hurt, it's likely more because it's recovering not cuz of the tea. As you say, it will hurt less and less the more you drink cuz the fluid will help you feel better. Just don't drink any liquid too fast and you won't have a problem. Hope you get better soon
I had a new guy date over to my house for dinner and wine for our third date.
We spoke of sex. I said that I wanted to wait. I am 39 he is 37 and we met in a dating site.
We had two great dates out previously. We have been very attracted to
each other. Is it a bad thing that when he came over he gave me
aassage and Oral and I gave him only a hand job. We came together. He seemed distant and sleepy. We fell asleep together but he never cuddled me. He got up and dressed to
leave. He said he will call me later. He was leaving I stopped him for a kiss and a hug and he left. Was it too soon?
The only way you will know if it was too soon is if he doesn't call you, reply or get back to you OR if you talk to him about what happened and find out if he wanted more than just sex. I don't think it was necessarily a bad thing. I just see it as you made your decisions and now you have to see where it goes from there. Maybe he had things on his mind, which is why he wasn't going to hug or kiss you goodbye.. talk to him, go on another date WithOUt sex and then see what happens. Sometimes sex just happens without us foreseeing it, sounds dumb but it's true And the only way to figure out why, is to wait and see... I'm glad you stopped him to hug and kiss him, cuz even though he didn't cuddle you, he needs to know that it mattered to you. Talk to him about how you are feeling and give the relationship time to develop
So me and this guy have been best friends for like ever. It's an extremely complicated relationship. Long story short, we've never wanted to date but we've always been extremely physically attracted to each other. We hooked up for the first time ever last night. It was so random. Literally, we were honestly just bored and did it. He told me he didn't want to tell anyone. And I agree, people shouldn't know but I wanted to tell my girl best friend. He said "no, please, I would be extremely upset if you told her. I don't want anyone to know because I don't want people to look at our relationship differently or start treating us differently. I don't want things to change." and I agree. I don't want things to change. So I told him okay. But I told my girl best friend anyway!! :( and at first I was so relieved. I felt sick not tellig her. And now I feel sick forrrr telling her. And I have this paranoid feeling that she told her boyfriend who is friends with my guy best friend. I don't know. I completely trust her, and her boyfriend is so whipped even if he did know, he wouldn't tell. But I'm so nervous now that he's gonna know I told her and this all sounds so childish and immature but this boy means a lot to me. And I don't want this fact that we hooked up to ruin our friendship. And I domt want it to be because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. What can I do to cover my ass??? (I'm 16/F he's 17/M)
Hey,
I can see how you felt relieved when you told your best friend.. She has probly been there for you through thick and thin and trust me when I say I know exActly what you are feeling right now. In that moment, it was as if you HAD to tell your bestie this because you've been doing it your whole life! But no, unfortunately.. some things should be kept wrapped up in a tight ball.
Since you let the cat out of the bag, you now have to deal with it up front. Now, odds are that: if you tell someone a secret, no matter how long they keep it to themselves, they are probably going to tell someone else eventually. Just like your curcumstance. Your best guy friend told you to keep it to yourself (a secret) and you couldn't help yourself. It's human nature. I do have to say there are the odd few that don't spread things they hear, but that is the odd few.. You can now either:
1. Be honest; Confess to your best guy friend that you told your bff, BUT say that you trust her not to say anything and give a reason why - If you're guy says he doesn't trust you anymore cuz of this or is worried it will get out, let him know that 'if that happens, You will not, no matter what, change anything between the two of you'. And in saying that, make sure you try to act/stay the same as you were before.
2. Not tell your guy friend and see how it plays out. Going this route will mean that if it turns out your girl keeps it to herself, you're okay. BUT if she doesn't... go back to route number 1!! And let him know that she told someone if she did.
In all aspects, if you're honest with him, he should be able to forgive you one way or another. If he still doesn't... give it time. Then start talking to him again and eventually things should come around to what they used to be. Oh, and take this as a lesson so that next time, you'll think before you share. Good luck! Feel free to message me if you have any other questions
ive been with my boyfriend for 14 months now. and im completely confused. i have so many mixed feelings. we were so happy in the beginning we were perfect, hes my first everything, and im so comfortable with him its crazy. i love him so much. everything he does is cute and he does everything for me. pays for me puts me before anyone will walk in the freezing rain 3 miles to come and see me. hes the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for. but heres the issue. we started breaking up and making up ever since the middle of summer. when we fight its usually over jealousy or him getting mad at me because i ditched him or whatever. but when we fight they are huge. he gets so angry and yells and freaks out he alwaysflips out. im just getting tired of all of it. and i see my friends having fun being single and i just wanna be happy again. im not happy. me and my boyfriend always are fighting and now im starting to reject him and hes freaking out even more sayin gi dont love him or care about him or anything.... and he thinks i want someone else which i dont! i cant take our constant fighting and breaking up and making up anymore cause i feel like he just pushed me away cause he freaks out over a lot of little things. but im confused..... if i leave him will i be happy or regret it? am i supposed to break up with him? cause i love him so much and he does everything for me... i dont wanna take the mistake of dumping him cause what if we were supposed to be together in the end........ im just so confused and i need some help :(
Hi,
It sounds like you've come to a point where you need to talk to eachother. The way I see it both of you are wanting to be heard, but since nobody can listen over the screaming and yelling, nothing is actually getting worked out.
First things first: breaking up and getting back together several times is never healthy for a relationship. Obviously, since you broke up, something was not working and then when you got back together, whatever wasn't fixed in the first place still never got fixed; this causes a repetitive cycle until you just break up for good. If you two have jealousy issues, you have to explain to eachother that 'so and so' is just a good guy friend and you wouldn't do anything with him or visa vera. That way you can understand how this guy/girl fits into yours/your bf's life. Otherwise we all tend to assume and you know where that gets us. Also, if your guy thinks you are ditching him, you could explain where you are going and say you'll be back in ___ minutes, so that when you do come back, he doesn't have a reason to yell at you.
When he freaks out and says you don't love him, your natural instinct may be to tell him 'oh yea, I don't love you..' but please, don't say that. Simply tell him that you will always love him and you always care about him. If he continues saying you don't care, just remind him you love him, try to hug him, then simply walk away calmly. It's hard to explain how you feel to someone if they are all wound up in the moment sometimes. So once he takes a few breathes, tell him again. It is not your fault that he says you don't love him either. He is doing this out of anger only and the only thing you can do in that moment is help him realize you still do love him by being strong. If he thinks you want someone else, you've got to tell him he's the only one! Otherwise he'll keep thinking what he wants without any answers.. kind of like you right now. You need these answers.
None of us on here can tell you whether you will be happy or regret leaving him; only you know how you will feel if that were to happen. What I can tell you is that you may regret it at first and then end up feeling happier once you are out of this situation. It's all up to you. If you were supposed to break up with him, you would of had an ultimate reason why you couldn't stay with him. Such as, he yells to much or he makes you feel bad.. Or you turn around and just keep trying to see if it will work out together. Give it another week or so and then make a decision. Who says when you break up with someone it will be forever?
Ok so I really liked this guy he was really nice and I told him I liked him. He said that he wasn't over his ex who broke his heart. So he said he thought I was beautiful to one of my friends and I danced with him at homecoming and when the lights came on we kept dancing untill the song ended. Yet when he saw me with my male friend he got a sad look on his face and hasn't talked to me since.
So I am wondering if he likes me now. I still love him and even when I was texting a guy friend all I could think of was him. Please advise
Hi,
I think he likes you. I know a guy who's not over his ex yet and I want to date him. The thing is, you have to show him your outgoing fun-loving personality in order for a guy in this situation to love you more than his ex. The fact that he danced with you, was honest about his ex, and had a sad look on his face, tells me that he cares about you. How you ask? The sad face doesn't mean he didn't like you, it just meant that he needs reassurance that you won't be like his ex and cheat on him with your guy friend; He has a broken heart after all. To help your love interest realize this, you have to let him know that you and this other guy are just friends. Once you let him know that and he understands, ask him if he would like to go out with you. Oh, and don't tell him you love him right away cuz that might freak him out. After you are in relationship mode, wait until you can tell he feels the same way as you, then let him know.
I do believe once you tell him how you feel and how you won't hurt him, he'll be open with you and talk to you again. Now, remember to not rush things. Start by telling him you and your bud are just friends then work from there with your love interest. I'm sure he will appreciate the honesty, but if for some reason he can't let his heart move on just yet.. Give him time. Say a week or so without bugging him/asking him, then try again. He will be more likely to say yes and by the sounds of it, you've already got a good start :)
19f
the first day i met my boyfriend i was completely attracted to him and made it a goal of mine to be with him. he is soo cute. he played so hard to get but after six months he was mine.
Hey,
First, I am sorry this took a while to write, but in doing my best, please read on :)
I think you want to be friends because your relationship has just gone down a bit since the first time you got together; This happens to all relationships over time. You said yourself this guy is cute, a sweetheart, says he loved you, is a great guy and to top it all off: you get along great with his friends! So I think instead of asking yourself "is this guy right for me?" You should be saying "what can I do to make this relationship work?". It's like when a kid gets a new toy; the excitment wears off eventually. So to fix the problem, you have to create that spark of interest again. Start by choosing something you both enjoy doing, but haven't in a while and make a plan to do it oneday, just the two of you. It could be simple as going for a walk or playing mini golf together. Things like: dancing, clubs, karaoke nights, concerts, watching a scary movie, or doing something you can both relate to will bring you closer together. I have found that unless you are watching a movie in the privacy of one of your rooms, it can be hard to have a good conversation or those special "one on one" moments. So find something you both have to get involved in to do. Once you add interest to your dating style, the connection will soon be there again.
You shouldn't feel bad, you just need a refresher as most relationships do to keep yourself motivated that this is what you want. Please do not unintentionally 'burn the bridge' so to speak before you know what you are getting yourself into. Anything can work as long as you want it too
i have been in love with this very nice boy for about a year. I have dated other people because he turned me down. Then i saw him naked at bandcamp he didn't see me.He mooned me at the lake by acciedent and then he said my bikini was nice very nice. How do I proceed. He is still in love with his ex. She dosen't love him and is stringing him along.
Hi,
First off, don't tell him that his ex is stringing him along even if it is true - this will only push him away further. To move this friendship further you have to find a way to spend some quality time with him. Ask him to hang out, grab some drinks, or go to the beach together. Any situation where you are forced to do something together or talk is a pretty good choice. Once he agrees to hang out, it should be easier to proceed to a relationship. If he asks to hang out with you after a few times, that is a good sign. I believe he already likes you a bit since he did compliment your bikini. Just take it slow, work your way into his daily scene and soon he will realize you are better than his ex
So a year ago me and my ex broke up-he ended it.
I didn't talk to him for months, however recently contact has started again.
Like he texted me happy birthday in June, he gave me a sorry note at prom, and then we texted each other every day for the summer holidays.
Now however, texting has stopped and whenever I log onto facebook he grabbs me on chat to talk. What does he want and how to ask him? any advice welcome :)
Hi,
I think he contacted you again cuz he missed what he used to have with you or he realized you were an awesome girl so he wants to be friends again. Sometimes a guy will contact his ex cuz he wants to get back together.. But that's if he still has feelings for you, which you'd have to find out. Right now he probly wants to hang out with you or he wouldn't be talking to you on chat everytime. You could find out what he wants by asking why he likes talking to you or if he misses you. You'll have your answer when he tells you and only you can find out what his intentions are
Do you think your flirting advice is good for men to OTHER men? Or is it only effective if a woman is doing this with a man? (your advice sounds like it might be something a woman might do)
Any thoughts? (please nothing hateful or homophobic! thanks!)
Hey there,
I'm sure all my advice on flirting could work on a guy, whether you are a guy or a girl. As with any situation, I believe that it all depends on what type of guy you are flirting with. I mean, every person is going to have a different personality, so you have to flirt with what would suit theirs the best. For ex: if you are flirting with a shy guy, don't come on too strong Or if you are flirting with someone who is real outgoing, be a bit bold. So, first find out what he's interested in and go from there. I am sure you have read some of my profile questions/replies already, so use any of it to your advantage. Or if you would like personal advice on how to handle a situation, feel free to inbox me again, I will try to reply as soon as I can. Thanks for the questions :)
i want to know how could i tease him strongly, without touching him, just by talking or my behavior?
You can tease him by winking at him, leaning your chin down then looking up at him, staring into his eyes, raising your eyebrows then lowering them quickly, making sexual motions with your hands, lowering then raising your voice slightly, smiling at him, squinting your eyes slightly to give him a sexy stare, or whispering in his ear
Theres this guy I like but I'm not sure how he feels about me because he sends a lot of mixed signals. One day we attended a church function and he sat next to me the whole time and was talking and making me laugh. Some other girls were interested in him and my friend wanted to hook him up but he never went over to talk to them he stayed at the table with me which i was kinda shocked i thought he would have been interested in them. He was hesitant like he did want to go over there but he never did. Then at the end of the night he hugged me and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I felt really happy but idk what he really feel. There r other days when he is distant from me like he seems nervous to talk to me but he has no problems talking to other people i wish he could feel comfortable with me and sometimes when i look at him he smiles at me. He does flirt with other girls which makes me jealous. What should I do does he like me or not?
Hey,
Think about this> The signs: He stayed at the table with you, He hugged you AND kissed you on the cheek, plus he smiled at you; put those all together and it sounds like he likes you! He must of seemed nervous around you, for when guys like a girl (you!) they get nervous. Just as you might get nervous being around a really cute guy. Believe it or not, guys have a simular feeling around a cute girl they like. He is probably worried he will say something wrong to you, so he 'clams up' in those moments to gather his thoughts.
To make him more comfortable around you, you just have to talk to him more. Start by saying little things like "hi", "whats your favorite _____?" or "what are you doing later today?". Once you have a conversation, keep it moving and try to see if you have any common interests without asking him directly. From what you wrote above, it appears he already has an interest in you - maybe as just a friend, maybe as more... Spending time with him will be the only way to know for sure. Once you are communicating with eachother and starting to hang out more, becoming good friends will be easy. After the friend stage, only then shall you enter the relationship one. Don't be afraid to flirt with him! You should be able to tell how he feels by the actions he shows. If he keeps hugging you, kisses you again, touches your arm, asks to hang out more than once, or stares at you for a small amount of time, those could all be clues. Talk to him, hang out and work your way from there. Good luck girl
I have been dating this really sweet guy and he is my first boyfriend. I have realized i really dont have those feelings for him even though i thought i did. Either i have to end it. He has told my friends he really really likes me and i dont know how to break it off with him. I feel so bad. How can i let him down gently
Hey,
I know it's always hard to let go of your first boyfriend, expecially if he's sweet.. so if you don't tell him directly (to his face), it will seem cowardly of you and he will be even more upset than if you just told him straight up. Say you like him, but you aren't ready for this relationship yet OR that you only like him as a friend, so you don't think you could work out dating-wise. Both are legit reasons and he should understand without feeling gut-crenchingly sad... If he does, that just proves it wasn't true love to begin with. Don't feel too bad, there's always another guy for you and girl for him. Plus, if it wasn't meant to be, it just wasn't
My boyfriend is my best friend! We've been dating for almost two months but we have been good friends for about six months. We're inseperable and have a strong trust and chemistry with each other. I've only had sex twice, and so has he, but we both feel ready to go to the next step. My boyfriend has always been very patient with me and he is so sweet. I have never felt more comfortable with anyone like I do with him. I'm not very experienced with sex and I'm a little nervous. We're planning to do this on Friday, and we will use protection. I'm just scared I won't be satisfying. I never enjoyed giving oral and I'm very sensitive, and pretty tight... So I don't know if I will please him like I want to. I am so in love with him, as he is with me, and I just want to have an enjoyable, passionate sexual experience with him without being nervous... Any advice?
Hey,
By the sounds of your question, you two seem really close and so I think you should just take a deep breath. I know you might be thinking 'that's it?'. Well you mentioned that you've both have had sex before so its nothing too new.. If you are nervous, I would reccommend talking to your bf. Talking will be the best thing to ease your mind. Say how much you love him and then that you want to make the best out of Friday. Then, On Friday before you have sex you could mention how you've waited for this and you would love for him to lead a bit during the sex. By telling him this directly, you are letting him know he is free to help, without you sounding like you're too nervous (nothing wrong with that). He might even be more turned on by that thought :)
As for being satisfying, there is very little you could do to not be that. Your bf will love that you are there and be happy you are sharing yourself with him. Talk to him beforehand tho and most importantly, plan for lots of foreplay. This will help you get in the mood and help to relax you. If you are tight, it will also help make it easier; Remind him to take it slow. Communicating and working together will really work to your advantage. Oral is fairly easy too when the guy directs you along the way; just go with the flow. You will know he is enjoying it if he is smiling and moaning. And if he does say otherwise, don't be afraid to take some pointers from him. Remember that he won't ever think you are doing something wrong, he will only be glad you tried
i've been freaking out lately and i decided to get an hiv test tomorrow. my boyfriend and i have been together for a year and we've had unprotected sex everyday pretty much since then. he's in the military so he gets all std tests every year or so. he recently had one done and he doesn't have anything. i know understand that it doesn't necessarily mean i'm clear, but if i did have something, wouldn't he have caught it by now? what are the chances of that? thank you for answering.
Hey,
If you had something, it doesn't necessarily mean he is clear even though he already had a test. Sometimes people can go months without knowing if they are STD positive or not, cuz there can be absolutely no signs for that long depending on the STD... BUT, don't let that scare you, for if you get tested and it's negative, you should both be ok. If you still feel unsure after that, you can always go back to double check. It is very smart of you to get tested ASAP! It is the only for-sure way to know.
The chances of him catching an STD from you by having sex (if you are positive): very high without the use of a condom. Get tested (you and your partner All The Time), wear a condom and you won't ever have to worry. Remember: It's aleways better to be safe than sorry. Best of luck
can a 14 yr old giel date a 17 yr old boy w/o getting in trouble?
Yes, I believe this is completely okay, for dating someone isn't about how old the other person is, it is more about how compatible you are with them. Whenever you have the basics of respect and love for another person, you could definitely have a successful relationship too. Age is truly just a number and you two are only 3 years apart which isn't much.
The only way I could see you getting in trouble is if your parents wouldn't agree with you dating him Or if it is against your culture. If neither of those things apply, I say go for it! Date whomever makes you smile and will treat you like a lady. Have an awesome relationship :)
I have known my boyfriend for about six months. Before going out, we talked constantly and got to know each other very well. He is pretty much my best friend. I fell pretty hard for him a month ago and I just like him a lot and now that we've been official for a good week now, I am pretty stoked. There is no doubt that I am in love. Thing is, I wanna tell him... But I feel like I will scare him away and it's too soon. He and I go well together but I don't wanna mess things up. What do you think? Is it acceptable to be in love with someone you've known for a while even if you've been dating a very short time? I really like him and I just wanna tell him everything but I am scared.
Hey,
I think the only way you will scare him away is if you know he doesn't feel the same way as you. As you said, you have known him for several months now, so I don't see that as a problem. Though, if you still feel unsure, I would ask him 'how do you feel when you are around me?' Or after having a good day together, say 'I hope everyday will be like this with you'. How he responds to those comments will let you know how he would feel about you dropping the L word. If he says he enjoys everyday with you, that he cares about you, or something along those lines, I trust he will appreciate you telling him.
I think you should do what your heart feels is right. If your bf loves you the way you love him, he will have no problem with your feelings And it will likely bring you closer. I also believe that love does take time, but when the heart feels certain things and has the right knowledge of another person, it could definately be love after only a short amount of time; Simular to 'love at first sight'. Once you are content he is at the same place as you, it will be completely okay to let him know. And if you still feel unsure after talking with him/going through your thoughts... follow your heart, it will lead you where you want to go.
Ok so the othernight at a baseball game I got to hang out with these guys I always have dreamed about hangin out with and well I actually got to the other night(: the boy jami he is one year older than me, me 15 him 16 almost 17 but like this boy came up to and started talkin and he goes "Why are you hanging out with her noone does" But he didnt sound serious and I do hang out with a lot of people. Then before I left I hugged my friends Nicole and Layla bye and he goes "Girl don't even expect to get a hug from me". Well I over react about everything so I was just wonderin do you think he really meant that or do you think he was just teasin like boys do kinda like boys will be boys? Cuz he is like a goofy person anyway so what do you think serious? or goffin around? Please help thanks(: -Madi
Hi,
To me it sounds as if his friend was teasing his buddy about liking you. If this other guy had a smirk or grin on his face while saying it, that also is a sign he was only kidding (besides not sounding serious). Plus, when the guy said "girls don't even expect a hug from me" he was likely teasing and implying he wanted a hug. If I were you, when he says that again walk up to him and hug him Or hold out your arms. I am sure he would love a hug from you :)
Somtimes it is hard to read guys, but when you know how he usually acts and if you watch the expressions when they are talking it becomes much easier.