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Hooked up with my best friend
So me and this guy have been best friends for like ever. It's an extremely complicated relationship. Long story short, we've never wanted to date but we've always been extremely physically attracted to each other. We hooked up for the first time ever last night. It was so random. Literally, we were honestly just bored and did it. He told me he didn't want to tell anyone. And I agree, people shouldn't know but I wanted to tell my girl best friend. He said "no, please, I would be extremely upset if you told her. I don't want anyone to know because I don't want people to look at our relationship differently or start treating us differently. I don't want things to change." and I agree. I don't want things to change. So I told him okay. But I told my girl best friend anyway!! :( and at first I was so relieved. I felt sick not tellig her. And now I feel sick forrrr telling her. And I have this paranoid feeling that she told her boyfriend who is friends with my guy best friend. I don't know. I completely trust her, and her boyfriend is so whipped even if he did know, he wouldn't tell. But I'm so nervous now that he's gonna know I told her and this all sounds so childish and immature but this boy means a lot to me. And I don't want this fact that we hooked up to ruin our friendship. And I domt want it to be because I couldn't keep my mouth shut. What can I do to cover my ass??? (I'm 16/F he's 17/M)
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Hey,
I can see how you felt relieved when you told your best friend.. She has probly been there for you through thick and thin and trust me when I say I know exActly what you are feeling right now. In that moment, it was as if you HAD to tell your bestie this because you've been doing it your whole life! But no, unfortunately.. some things should be kept wrapped up in a tight ball.
Since you let the cat out of the bag, you now have to deal with it up front. Now, odds are that: if you tell someone a secret, no matter how long they keep it to themselves, they are probably going to tell someone else eventually. Just like your curcumstance. Your best guy friend told you to keep it to yourself (a secret) and you couldn't help yourself. It's human nature. I do have to say there are the odd few that don't spread things they hear, but that is the odd few.. You can now either:
1. Be honest; Confess to your best guy friend that you told your bff, BUT say that you trust her not to say anything and give a reason why - If you're guy says he doesn't trust you anymore cuz of this or is worried it will get out, let him know that 'if that happens, You will not, no matter what, change anything between the two of you'. And in saying that, make sure you try to act/stay the same as you were before.
2. Not tell your guy friend and see how it plays out. Going this route will mean that if it turns out your girl keeps it to herself, you're okay. BUT if she doesn't... go back to route number 1!! And let him know that she told someone if she did.
In all aspects, if you're honest with him, he should be able to forgive you one way or another. If he still doesn't... give it time. Then start talking to him again and eventually things should come around to what they used to be. Oh, and take this as a lesson so that next time, you'll think before you share. Good luck! Feel free to message me if you have any other questions <3
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Well, if "did it" means sex, then I think you are WAY too young to do that, because you are 16...
But, you should stay together. If you two havd been best friends for a long time, and you have feelings for each other, than stay as a couple.
And if telling your friend is uncomfortable, than tell her you were joking. If she doesn't believe you, than ask her if she has told anyone.
I hope I helped :)
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