I'm a 21 yr old female college student, currently studying astronomy-physics. I also enjoy writing, and I love dogs. I don't know what I'm doing with my life, but I have experienced a lot of life.
Gender: Female
Member Since: July 3, 2008
Answers: 84
Last Update: September 1, 2008
Visitors: 4068
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Can a person smoke cigarette butts found in ashtrays? Is it unhealthy? (yes i know smoking isn't healthy but could you get like a cold from doing it or something?) Im NOT GOING to do it, I'm just curious. (link)
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I don't think it's possible, that's why they are thrown away...
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hey. i'm 13, 5'5" and weigh 88 pounds. i really want to become a fashion model. my only prob is i don't know any agencies who want me and i don't know want they r looking for. please help me out because i really want to become a model. im very pretty and i took modeling classes. plus i don't think that my mom or dad approves of my "modeling" career. so what should i do? (link)
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This really isn't the best place to ask this. I would talk to the agencies and ask them what they are looking for. You could also ask an actual model if they will be a mentor and give you advice. Look up models in a magazine or newspaper ad then see if you can contact them on myspace or something. Most people like to help others. At 5'5" and 88 lbs though, you are too skinny, and not in a healthy way...
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So my boyfriend said that he would like to finger me. But it's just ever since puberty I have had that "ricotta like discharge" in the inside of my vulva (like right in between my labia majora and labia minora). Down there it also happens to be really really red between those labias. But the discharge that actually comes out of my vagina I know is normal, but it's the discharge that is between my vulvas. It's right in between the crease that separates those two labias where the "ricotta like discharge" is. I wash myself down there and stuff, but is it normal? Does anyone else have that? (link)
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Sounds like a yeast infection. Just go to a store and buy the medicine for it, like Monostat 3-day. Don't buy the 1-day ones or 7-day ones. The 1-day doesn't work, and 7 days is too long. Or see a doctor, but they will probably tell you the same thing.
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I wanna be cool but im just too overweight...i have nice clothes and tons of friends but am afraid ill never have a boyfriend because im overweight....i love food.....everything. People make fun of me and i eat healthy but i can just never lose weight...it hurts when people call me fat...and i know it's true...help needed..i wonder what i should do. (link)
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You could try talking to a dietitian so you can lose weight in a healthy manner. Don't worry about having a boyfriend. That will happen when you love yourself. People are mean. No one should be made fun of. Just because something is true, doesn't mean a person should be made fun of for it. Try not to care about being cool and getting a boyfriend. Work on improving your self esteem first.
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16/f.
im scared of people like in gangs in stuff or people who could beat me up. but i don't get any dignanty if i let them walk all over me and im tired of taking their crap. i want to be able to do or say anything i want[nothing stupid of course]. and i am going to do that, but do you think those people will beat me up or shoot me? (link)
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Do gangs in your neighborhood regularly kill people? If you live somewhere like Compton CA or LA then you have reason to be worried, and I would say what is more important, your dignity or your life? If they don't respect you, just ignore them. Be above them, don't stoop to their level. No one can say whatever they want and do whatever they want. Life doesn't work that way. Don't get people mad at you with your opinions. If what you have to say will get them angry, just don't say it to them. You don't have to prove anything to them. You know who you are.
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i am always so bored that i want to die, it makes me so angry and frustrated and sad. all i do is work and then i don't know what to do with myself. i try to go with some of my hobbies like painting or photography or watch tv or read books but i just don't feel like doing anything at all ever...i want to fucking kill myself. and my boyfriend feels like the same way. i just want to die. so does he. what the hell is wrong. help. (link)
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You could try taking a class at a community college or university just for fun, like a creative writing class or art class or dance class. You could also volunteer your time at the humane society or nursing home. Do you have other friends besides your boyfriend? Does your boyfriend have other friends besides you? Try hanging out with your friends more. Go to a movie, or play a board game.
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Is there a way to tell if you have PMS without going to see a doctor?? I always get angry about the stupidest things right before my period. Someone could go buy me something I've always wanted and I'll get really mad. I'm not sure if it's PMS or if I just get angry because I know my period is coming... since I know my cycle now... please help me!! (link)
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Did it happen before you knew your cycle? It probably is PMS and a doctor can't do anything about it, so there's no point in seeing one about it. Just try to calm down. Also, don't use the coming on of your period as an excuse to get angry and yell at people. I'm not accusing you of doing so, but many women do it without realizing it. It's possible to be angry but not show it to others or yell at others. You need to learn to hide your angry and not yell even when you feel like it. Emotions are controllable to a certain extent, even if they are hormone induced.
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I have a friend who is married for 5 years and having an affair. She confided in me and I as a friend listened....however the affair got way out of hand and I told her to stop it would be the best for everybody. She got mad after I told her that i told my husband. She in turn then started using me as an alibi and her scapegoat. So now she has turned the whole situation around and is telling her husband that it is me having the affair. I hate her ..so my husband sent some info to her husband annonymously...and she still turned everything around and is blaming me. My husband and i know the truth but there is no getting through to her husband because she is so manipulating. What do i do know? (link)
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This isn't your problem. This also isn't what I would call a friend. She took advantage of you without your permission by using you as an alibi. I would have stopped being friends with her after that. Break off your relationship with this couple. You and your husband have no obligation to convince her husband of the truth. You also shouldn't have told your husband anyway, because you betrayed her trust by doing so. Your friendship is over. It doesn't matter what she tells her husband about you and you shouldn't care. Again, it's their problem not yours. Just tell them you aren't going to be friends with them any more and then never speak to them again. Her husband will find out on his own what type of person his wife is eventually.
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Ok so I like 2 guys. Lets call them Chris and Jamie.
Anyways they both play soccer. And they are having a game on Friday and Chris goes to my school. and Jamie goes to a different school. so they are both playing on friday and the problem is im not going to be there at friday at ALL because im going away to the beach because of my band class. it sucks i dont even want to go. but i have to. the thing is if i go there i dont even know who i want to win. i want to go. because i havent ever hung out with Jamie before!!!! but what about chris. this is like my dream come true!!!!!!!!!!! but i have seen chris everyday at school but he doesnt seem that interested. and jamie goes to my church but not the same time so i never get to see him. he just called me on the phone right now and i really dont know how to call him back and tell him all of this?? HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!! Please i promise i will give you a five even if you just answer this is really important to me i just really need advice NOW or NEVER!!!! i really like them BOTH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (link)
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Go to the band trip. After all you paid for it and you have an obligation to go regardless if you want to or not. Tell "jamie" you can't go but would have gone if you could have. Then wish him luck. Do the same with Chris if he asks, but if he doesn't ask, don't say anything. You have other opportunities to hang out with either of them. Sounds like Jamie is more interested so I would try getting to know him first, and if you decide you don't want to date him, then get to know the other guy.
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i have a problem. im the oldest, and of three younger girl sib. and my second sister always gets all the attention from the other ones. i feel left out. and shes like my best friend. so everytime i try to have fun i cant because shes allways the center of attention. even though they are supposed to be looking up at me not her. ehmygawsh. :( what should i do about this? (link)
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Sounds like you are jealous of the attention your sister gets. There isn't a lot you can do about this. Just let it go. If you want to spend more time with your younger sisters without your other sister taking their attention away, why not go to a movie alone with one of them? Just tell your sister that you want quality time with your other sisters without her. She should be understanding.
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I'm a thirteen year old girl and in eighth grade. I like myself, and I have lots of friends. (I even work out and try to eat right to make myself feel good.) But sometimes I get really low self-esteem, and I get red in the face or quiet when I'm around people, even ones that I like! I have some trouble talking to people, and sometimes they take this as hostility. (I speak flatly and have a hard time laughing) A few days ago, a girl thought that I didn't like her just because I said something that sounded mean, but I didn't mean it that way, and I really think that this girl is awesome!!!
How can I open up to people, be more friendly, and feel better about myself? (link)
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I'm the same way, particularly around large (5+) groups of people. If you do better with 1-2 people, then why don't you try having 1-2 people come over for a sleep over or a play date or a movie so they can get to know you better. Once many people know you better, you will get more comfortable in the group as a whole over time. The more practice you have interacting with people, the easier it will be. Start small.
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I know this ex-colleague of mine but not really that close to him. I think i have a crush on him but i dont really know if he likes me at all.
He's confident, witty and a workaholic.
However, he gets shy/uncomfortable, when i ask him simple personal questions for eg: Do you go for swimming. I think he has a problem of talking about himself to new people or just not that friendly.
So one day, i gave him some sweets via his secretary (i didnt really know him that well at that time in office) and he was quite startled and stared at me and waited for me to say something when i bumped at him at the doorway.
He had those puppy eyes..but didnt say word!.
I pretended not to appear interested in him becos i was too shy.!
Later, i sent him email and was able to chat with him about work..and he responded quite well except that when i asked him for lunch, he just disappeared and dint reply yes/no.,,which was kind of weird.He could have said no.
I managed to obtain his cellphone and he replies all my sms except the ones on personal questions.
So how do i even talk to him tru the phone as a friend, if he's that shy since i dont really see him anymore in office?
How do i get him to even talk to me like a normal friend?
Would appreciate your advice.
(link)
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It could be that this guy is shy, or it could also be that he has a hard time trusting others and his personal life isn't that great. Maybe he has personal problems or health problems that he is trying to hide. Maybe he is a closeted homosexual or maybe he is married or has a girlfriend already. Maybe he lives with dysfunctional parents. Maybe he is much poorer than you or maybe he has a fear of water that makes it so he can't get into a pool. Who knows? I think he does have trust issues though. Try asking him to lunch in person and see what happens. If he refuses, or acts awkward, I would just let him go and find someone else to hang out with.
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I am 19 turning 20 this year and my bf just turned 23 yesterday... my only problem with the relationship is that nobody respects it except his family. I live with my grandparents and I just came back from boarding school last year, anyway this is the first time they see me with a boyfriend. They say that they dont like him because they have a strange feeling and im too accomidating. I dont understand this because i usually call the shots in the relationship and i have tried to look at the relationship in a objective view. I see a little bit of what they are talking about but to me it seems to be because of our backgrounds... he used to be poor and when i went to live with my grandparents while i was young, i lived a privledged lifestyle. anyway, i really want to know how i can somehow get them to at least respect my relationship by not setting me up with other guys while im dating him and they keep saying that we will never last and purposely fighting with me anytime that i want to see him cause they know i hate conflict.We have talked about marriage and such and decided that if we are still dating next year then we would consider getting engaged then and married after I get my bacchelors. Grandma said that she will not go to the wedding and she doesnt want to know if we get engaged. I dont want to stop talking to her but she is controlling my life and disregarding any action i take as an adult. please tell me any words of wisdom that you might have. any... (btw... my grandpa loved him until he had a chat with grandma and now he doesnt talk on the subject and my bf is very respectful and follows all of thier rules even though they change them weekly) (link)
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I think you're right when you say it's because of your differing backgrounds. They may have a stereotype of poorer people and not think he's good enough for you because of it. By accommodating, I'm wondering if they think this in terms of money. Who pays for food when you go out to eat? Do you split the bill or does he pay for it or do you pay for it? If you pay for a lot of things, your grandparents (being old fashioned) may view that in a negative light as him taking advantage of you and you accommodating him. There isn't anything you can do to change your grandparent's minds about him. Only they can do that. If you want to get engaged and marry him, then do it. It doesn't matter what your grandparents think. In the mean time, don't talk to your grandparents about your future plans. Just say you're dating and don't know what will happen in the future. Keep your plans to yourself. Don't worry about your grandmother saying she won't go to the wedding. I think that's an empty threat she's using to convince you to break up with him. If you get married, just tell her how heartbroken you would be if she didn't come.
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I am terrifyed of getting my preteen shots. do'nt you have to get like 8 or something?! i'm freaked and mom says she won't come in because if they look "down there" she will be freaked. i;m scared i bet my heart rate will be like too high. i have major needle phobia-help (link)
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Tell the doctor that you are afraid and ask for something to numb your arm first. They can make it so you don't even feel it.
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ok well i dont remember if you get cut off of advienators if you curse so i wont.
BUT i think the action of me staying away from a guy like that was mature and the fact that bothers you distubs me. because lets see which sounds more mature me seeing a hot guy 4 years older than me and me and jumping on him. or finding out more about him and trying to find out if im even intrested first? pluss the fact that he does drugs is tottaly against my standards and well me keeping to my standerds seems pretty mature to me. so next time you decide to judge ask first because that would be the " mature" thing to do.. (link)
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You misunderstood what I was saying. Look, you staying away from the guy if you don't want to date him is mature-to a point. You avoiding him but talking to him in groups and never telling him how you feel is immature. The mature thing for you to do is tell him that you don't date smokers and drinkers or people who do drugs, that way he knows what your intentions are. You're playing with his emotions by not saying anything and this whole talking to him in public but avoiding in private thing is an immature action. You already said he was annoyed with you and he has a reason to be. By saying nothing to him about how you feel, you're leading him on and he doesn't know what to think. Also, if you apparently don't date smokers and drinkers, then why do you say you're interested? Most guys don't date girls 4 years younger than them in general (this only goes for the 14-25 age group, 25 yr olds don't usually date 20 yr olds and 18 yr olds don't usually date 13 yr olds, ect) unless they are immature for their age themselves and want sex. There are rare exceptions. But again the exceptions are very rare. You need to talk to him and tell him you don't date people who do drugs or drink and that you only want to be friends. Set clear boundaries. Let it be known to him that you only want to hang out with him in a group setting. If you can't tell him this, that makes you immature. Playing with his emotions the way that you are is immature. Guys don't take hints, they have to be told. If you do tell him your intentions, and he doesn't listen to your boundaries, that makes him immature. Hopefully you understand what I'm saying...
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Lets just say i am mature and and the reason im staying away from him is because he does drugs and smoke and i dont like that. honestly if i didnt know that about him i would be all over him and the fact that u would question my maturity level says alot about you. (link)
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I will consider you mature when I see you act like it...actions speak louder than words.
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Im 13 i dont have a dad he left 4 years ago. Im not close with my family no matter how hard I try to be. Things are getting bad with my mom. Shes compulsive. Shes obsessed with her house. For example if i need something (clothes, things for school which i dont ask for these things alot) she always says she doesnt have the money yet she bought a $3500 floor & now shes getting our entire outside of the house done. And she just got a new floor 3 months ago and the outside of the house redone last summer. Shes just blowing money she claims she doesnt have. I cant live at home cuz she yells at me for everything. If i walk on the carpet after she vacums i get yelled at & its the same thing if i get finger prints on the mirror. its stupid. And im sick of being yelled at all night and day. Sometimes she starts with me at like 2:00 in the morning. I cant live with her & sometimes she comes into the room yelling at me & doesnt tell me wat i did wrong. My friends agree that shes compulsive. & i dont know who to turn to cuz my entire family always takes her side. I dont know wat to do. She hits me sometimes but not all the time. I cry in a closet frequently because things are getting worse by the day. i try to stay at a friends house but she yells more. i dont no wat 2 do now. (link)
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Your mom sounds exactly like my mom when I was growing up. My mom has Bipolar II disorder. I think your mom might have a mental disorder like bipolar or depression and your dad leaving could easily cause it. If she does have a mental disorder, then telling her how you feel and reasoning with her will be impossible. The illness would prevent her from listening to you. I would suggest talking to an adult relative, friend, school counselor or neighbor or your friend's parents...some adult about the possibility of your mom having a mental disorder. Then you can make a plan to do an intervention of some sort so your mom can see a therapist and doctor. You could also write your mom a letter (so she can't yell at you) telling her how you feel and how worried you are about her, and how you think she may be depressed. A misconception about depression is that it only involves crying, but that's not true. Everyone in my family yells a lot and gets mean when they're depressed. When they're not depressed, they act perfectly normal. Please don't blame yourself for your mom's behavior, and don't try and ask why she does this. I'm pretty sure she's just depressed, and you unfortunately get the blunt of it. Hang in there. There is hope for your mom to get better. Try and be understanding. I know it's hard. I've been there too, but you're a smart person. Look up depression and bipolar disorder. I think it will help you to not resent your mom during this time. I know it doesn't seem like it, but she needs you now more than ever. She would be devastated if you left her like your dad did. I know you're only 13 and having to take care of your mom instead of the other way around is a lot to place on someone so young. I know it's hard, but there is hope that your mom can get better if she gets on medication and sees a therapist. Don't blame yourself, you've done nothing wrong. If you need a break and need to go to a friends house, DO IT! Your mom may yell at you for it, but you need breaks from this environment and you need outside help to deal with this. Don't worry about your relationship with the rest of your family. Just focus on the mental health of yourself and your mom. If your family refuses to help you, use your friend's parents. It may not seem like it right now, but keep in mind that your mom does love you. She can't express it due to her mental problems, but she loves you. I know this from personal experience as well. Try to do what is right for you and your mom, regardless of what your mom thinks. Use your head and your intuition. Your mom can't think logically now, so you have to be the logical one. Hang in there. You're a smart girl. It will get better. I'm giving you lots of hugs. Remember, it's okay to cry sometimes.
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hi from 17 yrs old i started masterbution now i m 27 yrs guy next month is my marriage but now a day i feel that my penis is not awaking it is loose & fell sperm in a min. please help me out (link)
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My personal opinion is that there is no medical cause for this to occur. How long has this been happening? I think this is a psychological problem. Marriage is a major life change and the pressure and stress could easily be causing you to not be able to maintain an erection. You also probably feel pressure to perform sexually for your future wife, which could also cause you stress. I would suggest seeing a therapist, or just don't worry about it. It would go back to normal after your wedding when you can relax more.
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ever since i got my braces off (three years ago) my jaw kinda pops sometimes.
that mostly stopped for a while, but recently i've been expieriencing a LOT of soreness on the left side; it feels like a bruise and i can't open my mouth all the way.
it's not my teeth, i suspected it might be a cavity but i got checked and it turns out i don't have any.
any way i can make the pain stop?
what might have caused this?
thanks! (link)
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Sounds like you injured your jaw. This happened to my sister when her wisdom teeth were pulled. Lucking on ice and gurgling salt water won't do anything for this. It's also not an allergic reaction, they don't last this long. I would just have a doctor or dentist look at your jaw and see what they recommend.
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15/f/usa
I've had a hemroid for the past six days, and I was at an amusement park yesterday. When I went to the restroom, i noticed my underwear was covered in blood! And it is my time to get my period. And I took advil for my hemroid, so I guess I didnt feel the period cramps. And today, and last night, I stopped bleeding.....there is like nothing, it's like i only bled for an hour or something. So my question is...was it the hemroid that was bleeding? Or what is up with my period? And i dont take birth control (link)
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It could have easily been the hemorrhoid or period. Where was the blood in your underwear? Near your anus or vagina? Or was there too much blood to tell? You don't always get cramps with periods. I would say, just wait and see. If you period doesn't come or you get more blood from the hemorrhoid, then talk to your mom and schedule a doctors appointment.
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