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Nurse, Equine Business OwnerAge:
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January 15, 2006Answers:
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about
I am 48 years old (yes that's old compared to some of you).
I have worked in nursing and/or healthcare management positions for 24 years. Primarily OB, Neonatal, Mental Health, Occupational Health and Geriatrics. In Jan 2008 I started my own business to board horses and do equine/human education. I am also a certified dog trainer.
I've been around the block so to speak and seem to be always helping others. I've been told that the reason people seek me out for advice is that I am approachable and caring. But on the same token even though I consider the person's feelings. I tell it like I see it. I've dealt with people in trouble with the law, dysfunctional families such as those with abuse & marriage problems. Not to mention problems with employees and employers.
I don't ever claim to know it all, and always keep an open mind.
advice
Ok i was at a party the other night and was about to have sex with this girl i like very much but i couldnt get a full erection. Ive noticed ever since this night i havent had an erection at all...this worries me very much please help..
I don't know your age, so I will do my best here.
A large percentage of the time this situation is caused by stress and emotional reasons..then the fear of not being able to perform when you want to the most, makes things worse. If this is the case then you need a very understanding partner with whom you are not only physically connected to, but emotionally connected to. Just to add some reassurance, I am sure this has happened to most guys, but of course they are not going to talk about it. If you were drinking..that could be the primary cause. The first thing to do is relax and not stress over this. Give yourself a few days and try to achieve an erection on your own without a partner. If you still can't then of course you should see a Dr to make sure that you don't have any medical cause for concern.
Check this site out:
http://familydoctor.org/109.xml
ok so im a virgin and im 17 never had sex! but ive become ill and for 3 years now ive kept getting urinry tract infectins and this time the doctor said its cythlis or something and im thinking ive not had sex ever why do i keep getting them and what is the doctor thinking? I have to questions one is they have sent some medicine so i need to start that but im really worried because my pubic area feels all tingly. Also when im older if i have sex i heard that the man can catch it and im really worried. Also will i get better and will this go away someone help me please. thank you in advance.
If you are talking about cystitis (bladder infection) and have never had sex, why are you connecting the infection with sex? Is that what the Dr said? If so don't be offended but this is his reasoning:
In female anatomy the rectum is close to the vagina, and the urethra is close to the vagina. E-coli is found around the rectal area, and the penis carries or moves E-coli near the urethra where it enters the bladder and can cause an infection. The most common cause of urinary tract infections is by the bacteria e-coli. Men can get urinary tract infections due to the e-coli contact during normal hetrosexual encounters too.
Now if you've never had sexual intercourse then you know that's not how the urinary tract infection was transmitted. It could simply be caused by wiping wrong after you use the toilet. Always wipe from front to back, not back to front.
Keep in mind that this information would only apply if your infection was caused by the most common bacteria.
sorry if its long but i rate high
ok about 2 nights ago, i had a dream that really scared the hell out of me. I dont know what it means so i was hoping someone here could help me. I dreamt that i was picking up my little brother from school with my mom. We were on the end of my block when i looked behind me and there was a man running towards us with a knife in his hand, i could see the blade of the knife in great detail, it was pointy and very jagged. After a minute i realized he was running towards me becuase he was looking right at my eyes. He was wearign a black t-shirt and wasnt skinny but not fat, a little heavyset. He looked hispanic sort of. I couldnt move though, or at least i didnt move. He finally reached us and then instead of stabbing me right away, he asked my mother if it would be better to stab me in my heart or in my leg. He said something about "wanting to hit a major artery so i could die and wouldnt be able to tell the police". it was similar to that. I hid behind my mom and waited for her response and was begging in my mind for her to say the leg. She said leg after what seemed to be a few minutes and then said "why dont you come to my house so we could get you something to drink" i knew she wanted to call the police. So she tried to take the man by the hand to take him to my house, and the knife changed. It now had a reddish handle and a blade that resembled to me a corkscrew. He strugled with my mother and i ran up to opposite block, towards my friends house. Then i woke up. Since I saw the man running across the street, my little brother seemed to be gone in the dream. He wasnt really involved with anything and i dont remember seeing him. What could this dream mean? Im 13/f if that helps. Please help me. Ill rate high for good answers. ♥
Sometimes dreams really don't mean anything. It's what I call brain garbage. Dream interpretation is interesting, but don't take it to heart. There is no scientific proof that our dreams have any deep meaning. If you are curious you might check out this site and put in the key words of your dream.http://www.dreammoods.com/
All my life I've had intense, frequent need to urinate, but when I do, there isn't much. Because it's been happening for so long, I don't think it's an STD or an infection... what could it be? I'm 18/F if that helps at all.
Thanks :)
What you are experiencing is called urinary retention, meaning you can't empty your bladder completely. Just because it has been happening for so long doesn't mean you should accept it as normal..just look at it as a condition that hasn't been treated yet. Only a qualified physician such as a urologist would be able to tell you the cause of your condition. There are so many things it could be it wouldn't be fair to you to try and guess. You owe it yourself to get some peace of mind and find out what it is.
I am 25 and almost 7ft. However, I do have one concern. Probably very common. My hair is disappearing. Balding is not really in the family tree. Although on my moms side, they do have thin hair. But i mean i am 25 and i am on my way to being bald. Is this normal? Is their ways i can have my hair grow back without laser surgery or hair transplant. Any help, tips, advice is very much appreciated.
Hello,
Yes, some men start losing their hair at 25. If it is male pattern baldness it will start frontally and on the crown. This is pretty typical. Thinning hair all over the scalp could be caused from a medical concern. If you want to look it up on the internet search for the word Alopecia. The best Dr to see for this problem would be a dermatologist.
A over the counter topical medication that has had some success is Minoxidil. A friend of mine used it and had good results, my husband used it and was just starting to see some new hair growth but he quit because he didn't want to spend the money each month. I think once a person stops their hair may fall back out. You could ask the Dr about this as a treatment and he/she will tell you if it's the best choice for your type of hair loss.
im 13 and ive lived in the same small town all my life.i know everyone.i want something diffrent.i want to move.but then id be leaving my friends and ive asked my parents abput moving and they say there planted here,and why get rid of somthing good.i want to leave and see more things in my life.i feel lost and that im needed somewhere else. i dont know who i am and i think that if i move that ill find what im looking for but i dont know what im looking for.ive lived here and ive done my deeds now someone else needs me.carolyn my friend says that god needs me and if i dont fallow my heart then i wont ecomplish on earth what god put me here for.i dont really know what im feeling and how do i stop it
katie plzzzzzzzzz help me
The unsettled feeling such as you describe usually starts a little older, but if you are mature for your age then you could be feeling it now. You are growing up and emotionally moving apart from your parents. Moving won't help you find contentment, because it starts inside you, in your heart, where ever you are. It's not something that you can find by traveling to a new place. My suggestion is to find ways to help people, when we help others we also help ourselves. I think you might be bored with things at home. Volunteer at a church nursery, nursing home, day care or help younger neighbor kids with their homework. When you graduate from HS plan to attend college in another state..that way you will get to see new things, but for now you can create contentment at home.
Good luck and let us know how it's going!
Ok, its not that urgent, but I just wanted to ask, ok, I am one of those people who think that dreams are sometimes like, a sighn, or a prediction. Well, latley I have had dreams about my ex-friend. She was nice at first, then she turned into a total brat, and now we hate each other. Anyways, about the dreams, one of them we became like, best friends again, another I called her and tried to appolagize and become friends again, and another she was at my best friends house. I dont know what this means! Please help me out!
It means is that are thinking of this situation a lot. Maybe even right before you go to sleep at night.
It's really hard to forgive people sometimes, but it eats away at us when we are full of hate and resentment. I think this is what your dreams are trying to tell you. Even if you never want to be friends with this girl again, at least forgive her so you can move on in peace. I bet if you do this the dreams will stop.
my name is Rachel and iam 17 years old and at school there's these 2 kids that pick on me and talk bad about my mom constantly and iam about to get fed up with it.Today the boy Justin is the worst he took my purse and ran around the classroom with it and he took my soda and shook it up and he told me that my outfit I was wearing looked like a nurses uniform.The girl told me that I was mean becouse I told on them.I feel like fighting both of them what should I do?
I am sorry you are getting picked on, school is hard enough. Why do some kids have to make it harder? Fighting will not solve the problem.
The problem is that these kids lack self esteem and have to pick on others just to make themselves feel better. So try reverse psychology.
They expect and want you to get mad and upset, so don't give them the pleasure. When you lose control, you just allowed them to take control.
Instead try to inject a little humor into the situation...say something like "Why Justin, don't you know that it's proven when you pick on someone it means you are in love with them"? "I just want you to know that I LOVE YOU TOO!" (in a sarcastic tone of course..but if you keep saying it he will get embarassed enough and stop.
I actually did this to a boy named Jimmy when I was in 8th grade. His face turned bright red and the whole class roared in laughter. That's all it took, he quit picking on me!
Ok guys...well you see...I think I might be pregnant....I haven't had my period since like Feb. so I'm pretty sure I am..but my problem is..that I'm 15 and my boyfriend is 19, and I really actually want this baby, because ya know if I was able to lay down and have unprotected sex..then I am able to take care of my baby...but, I'm just afraid that my mom is going to freak out and call the cops on my boyfriend and he is going to get thrown in jail because of the age difference. I'm so confused and I don't want an abortion and my boyfriend (whom I love) to be in jail...so, if any one has any advice..it is GREATLY appreciated!!!!
Hello,
First of all I want to tell you that your comment below is not true at all. Many young teens have sex, and very few can care for a baby.
"because ya know if I was able to lay down and have unprotected sex..then I am able to take care of my baby.."
The prolife stance is "You shouldn't be having sex if you are not responsible enough to take care of a baby" (But it is often worded like you described)
Anyway, if you honestly believe you are pregnant, you are already lagging behind in the responsibility aspect. Early prenantal care is essential, and apparently you have not taken care of that yet. The lack of prenatal care combined with your age makes your pregnancy high risk. Which means there is a high potential for complications.
Okay, since I am not meaning to lecture..I will move on to the advice. I am wondering, how does your boyfriend feel about having a baby? If he is willing to share the responsibility of a baby 50/50 then I think the two of you need a plan before you tell your Mom.
You will need to work out a budget first of all and plan how the two of you are going to earn enough money to survive on and support an infant.
Talk to a counselor at an organization such as "birthright" who should be able to help you.
When you approach your Mom if you have a viable plan for your future and the future of your child it might make things a little easier. I would suggest that your b/f is with you when you tell her. Why yes of course, your Mom may "freak out" but eventually as the initial shock wears off hopefully she will want to help you. Be prepared for most any reaction.
As other posters mentioned, research the law in your state that way you can be prepared in that aspect too. Remind your Mom that he cannot support the baby if he is in jail...if he has a job and you two have a plan hopefully she will realize that.
i'm a guy, and is it wrong to just want sex? honestly now, its what everyone wants
It's really not what "everyone" wants. Most girls want a committed relationship before they have sex. Most girls want someone to love them back. If that is all you want you need to be honest with your potential one night stand, and by all means use protection.
this year, i feel that i have started to change. I notice that my friends are best friends with other people and it's harder for me to understand them. We hardly talk like we used to and everyone seems to not find me as "interesting" as before. what's going on with me?
I don't think it's all you. Friendships have a way of changing. We have all moved apart from people who we thought at the time were our best friends. If you don't feel warm and fuzzy about these people, move on..and make new friends. Life is too short to get stuck in any relationship that doesn't build you up.
ok so i sound like an idiot but i really look up to my science teacher not in some perverted way but shes always there for anyone and shes a great teacher. ok so ive been having a lot of problems with some of my ex best friends and their friends with threats and stuff... ive also been getting blocked calls and texts threating to spread rumors and that stuff do you think its a good idea to ask her advice on this? my friends think its a really good idea and theyre worried about it, they said that if i dont do it then they will because its really scary. but i dont want to sound like a loser and i dont know how to ask. please help!
You should tell someone, and if you don't feel like you can go to your parents or a school counselor then she's probably the next best person to talk to. However, I always think it's better to keep personal problems out of the classroom if at all possible.
when do babies usually start teething? and what do you do to soothe the pain?
thanks
Teething starts at different ages but could start as early as 4 months. The gums will look a little inflammed and you can feel ridges where the teeth are trying to come through. I always noticed that my kids drooled more when they were teething so kept a bib on them while they were awake. Aside from cold teething rings you can try the "baby ora gel" but you have to be careful so the baby doesn't swallow it because it can diminish the gag reflex. You can also place a wet wash cloth in the freezer and get it semi frozen..the baby will chew on this and it helps.
Here's a good web site
http://www.thenewparentsguide.com/baby-teething.htm
Okay well your going to think im a whinny little brat and need to get over it but I cant. Me and my mom have been clashing every day for like forever. And me and my dad only occasionally did. But this whole week they both have been yelling and screaming at me. Telling me to fuck off and that there going to call the cops on me. I hadn’t even done anything to them. I barely even yelled. I just broke down in tears. I’ve been crying all week straight and I don’t know what to do anymore. Im at my breaking point and I cant take anything. I used to cut but my boyfriend got me to quit...but im considering it again. Its all snowy and cold out so I cant run away and all my friends are off doing something else. And it seems like the only one here for me is my boyfriend. I don’t know what to do anymore. I just know I cant stay here. Please help. What do I do? I rate 5's.
Hi,
I'm sorry you feel so bad. I think that your parents have some kind of problems or pressure that they are not telling you about. It seems that they may be taking that out on you, and thats wrong. Cutting or running away is not going to help, you will feel worse in the long run.
Be sure you don't lower yourself and yell or call them names. Just directly look at them and say in a very mature and calm voice "I am a good person"
Try to involve yourself in activities that you like, focus on school work, reading, crafts or writing. Decorate a small box, like a shoe box and call it your "worry box". Everytime you feel sad, write it all down and when your done put the pages in the box and close the lid. Pretend like your problems are put away for now, and you can start to feel better.
Good luck and I wish you the best.
My dad is an obstatrician/gynacologist. Part of his job therefore requires him to be on call somtimes to deliver babies. This I am use to, usually he's on call once a week & some weekends. However, in the past year 3 people have left his practice, so there are only 2 left. Now he is on call every other night & I htink it is tearing my family apart. My mom has seemed miserable lately - she's always crying because my dad is never home. My sister & I really wish my dad would be home more often too. I know there are other families where parents aren't home all the time, but it just seems like it is making everybody miserable. We keep telling my dad to find new people for his practice, but nobody wants to come & practice in CT, because it is too expensive. And my dad is not very proactive at all...he seems to want to take each day as it comes but we all want him to be more active in finding a new partner. I don't know how to handle this, I am only 16. I want my dad to be more active in fixing this problem but he just will not listen to any of us. This situation does not look good with everybody always so miserable. Being just a teenager, is there anything I can do? It hurts me so much too, to watch my mom cry & my dad never be home.
Hello,
I know you and your Mom want your Dad around more, but hopefully this is a temporary situation. It really sounds like he is burning the candle at both ends right now and doesn't have much of a choice. In the fast paced medical world there is a lot of pressure and it just may sound like he is not listening..when really it is on his mind a lot. As a teen what you can do is spend more time with your Mom, perhaps arrange a weekly get together with friends..and include the parents. If you can't talk to your Dad, write him a note and put it in his pocket or leave him a voice mail, simply tell him that you miss him, but no pressure.
Remember this...
The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. ~Mark Twain
As far as finding a partner for his practice, I think the only thing you should do is compose a list of physican recruting agencies (do a search on the internet) and take it to his nurse or office manager they can speak to your Dad about it. This will take the pressure off of him, and you too. Just try to do nice things for yourself and your Mom right now. Think positive and everything will work out!
well in the future i plan on adopting a child but I'm having a hard time deciding on where to adopt from.. I have 2 things to consider
1) how bad situations are were the child is from
2) how well they will fit into my family (looks wise)
I was thinking of adopting a baby from china but 1- they wont look anything like my family
2- there are over 50 nationalities in china and i don't know which one to pick
i think i want a baby from Mexico but i dont know! its so hard to decide
if a white female with slightly tan skin and dark hair
I want pics only please! if you can send me pics of coutries that alow adoption and what a child from there might look like that their situation what not that would be amazing! (must have most of that to get a 5)
I'm really open to any country accept like america and canada!
Since I don't know how old you are, I hope we on this board can set you straight. I don't want you to think I am a mean person, but I just couldn't resist answering this. First of all from going by your post, I don't think you are cut out to be a parent. Hitler wanted to develop the perfect race and the perfect person. One doesn't pick out a child the way they decide on what breed of puppy fits their lifestyle better. In fact..I am not so sure you should even own a puppy. If he pees on the floor I bet you'd take him back and ask for one that doesn't.
Adoption is an honorable thing to do, and my hat's off to adoptive parents and all they've gone through to bring a precious little one into their lives. However, you make it look like a joke!
hey this week have been very longgg week because i've know alot of people who are commenting suicide or died of suicide its so depressing for me right now because i've known this girl who just died of suicide this monday and it was hard for me to get through because i've known her since 1st grade and some reason my life have been in a total shock and it keep staying in that way its making me want to do something and i don't know what it is. its hard i can't help it its just like somebody have tooked my life away. what is really suicide? i know what it is but i don't know everything about suicide tho can you give me facts about it please!!. This past month i've known 2 suicides right now its sooo depressing for me right now its making me want to cry my eyes out for a year. i need some help. thanks
Lauren
When a friend takes their own life it leaves a lot of unanswered questions and loose ends. This may be why the feelings are so confusing for you. If you feel depressed, don't suffer alone. The important thing is to find people who make you feel better and talk your heart out!
Check out this site for more info. There is also a number to call if you wish.
http://www.save.org/basics/facts.html
Recently I tried out a phone chatline service and had a conversation with a supposed police officer. he seemed to be cool, not one of those all serious by the book type guys, rather laid back and open about alot of things. especially, his "freaky-type" ecapades. here recently alittle too open. in a conversation this morning, quite early I might add. the phone rings and it's the police officer, expressing his desires to be intimate with another male. not wanting to scare me off, he put what he wanted to share with me in the form of a question. like "you might not approve of what I did this weekend with this young guy still in high school whose build was simply too desireable to pass up." I encouraged him to divulge more information. he went on to say that the guy was kind of hestitant at first. but later relaxed and enjoyed the experience. his plan is to see the guy again this weekend saying he was going buy the young guy a few things. I was shocked. the policeman even shared with me his interest in another young guy. but, because this one is 14 he may wait awile. what if anything can I do? I'm in Mississippi and the police officer is in Lousiana. he also shared when he was younger his male cousins raped him. after which he came to enjoy the feeling, and because the guys he messes with are so young he uses no protection. I really don't know what to do, this is a law officer whose duty is to protect and serve surly he knows the consequences of his actions, or maybe he's abusing his authority.
I wouldn't believe for a minute that this man is a police officer. Not that an officer wouldn't do anything immoral or illegal because it happens. However if he were honestly a police officer he most likely wouldn't tell anyone about his illegal activities.
It's not your job to determine what he is or isn't, but it is your job to report the information to your local police. You may be saving the life of a vulnerable young boy who fell into his trap. If he has your number, he can find your address so of course you want to be on alert.
The police will know best how to investigate and they may need you to help gather evidence by way of numbers, conversations etc.
If he calls you again before you talk to the police don't give him any hints that you are on to him or he might skip town or even worse.
As far as why he is sharing the information, some pedofiles especially ones who choose teenagers are also narcisstic or antisocial and think their behavior is acceptable. They tell people who they believe are not a threat..it's like bragging and it's part of the whole sexual game. They think the boys or "children" asked for it or want it. YUCK what a perv!
I am rarely sexually aroused and then when I become "excited" I lose interest as soon as foreplay begins. What is my problem? Is there anything that I can do to fix this problem? Any advice is much appreciated. thank you!
Well part of it may be that you are not getting the right type of foreplay. You might need to experiement until you find something that works better. It helps to keep in mind that "sex" starts outside the bedroom. Meaning; it helps to be romanced a little and emotionally connected with your partner on a regular basis.
Otherwise there are some safe things you can do to lift your libido:
http://nm.essortment.com/aphrodisiacsnat_rafr.htm
http://www.dreamingearth.com/aphrodisiacs.html
Hey my name is Rachel and iam a 17 year old girl and iam babysitting this child who's autistic and he left the house today without telling me what should I do if he does it again?
Bring a friend with you to help, and don't let him leave the house. One of you won't be able to take your eyes off of him for a minute. If he leaves anyway, and you can't pick him up and carry him back in then you need to discuss this with his parents, they have probably experienced this too and should be able to help.