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My name is Elly and I am 18 years old. I live in Michigan and I graduated High School in '07. I'm currently attending a great college, but I'm home for the summer. It's too nice outside to sit on the computer all day, so I might not be as active on here as I would like.I guess a good way to describe me is experienced. I've discovered a lot about life and I can't wait to discover more... while having fun at the same time of course! ...BUT, like everyone, I have experienced things in life that I rather wish I hadn't. And I also feel that those bad experiences qualify me to help others with this column.
I have been in a serious relationship for over two and a half years now. I personally know that love is a difficult thing to nurture. It takes a lot of work. Life is NOT a fairytale where two people can simply love each other and everything will just fall into place. It doesn't work like that in the real world.
People on Advicenators are starting to disappoint me. Everyone says "ooh I want to help! I've experienced EVERYTHING!" Yet, I can't tell you how many questions I see with answers like "you could have googled that" or "we're not going to do your homework" or "I'm so sick of 'wow does he like me?!' questions." I used to sort of be like that, but now I realize how hypocritical that is. If I know the answer to a question, I will answer to the best of my ability without making you feel stupid for asking it in the first place. Advicenators is going to turn into a pretty nasty place if people just keep brushing off questions like that.
Rate or don't rate. I really don't care. But don't give me a 1 just because I tell you something you don't want to hear. Go to your mom for advice if you want sugarcoated answers.
I can give excellent advice on:
relationships/sex
friendship
family issues
anything about animals (i worked at a vet for several years)
college
advice
When a guy does something that you don't like [as in touching boobs or something]
how do you say no [in a nice way] ?
and if you are too busy kissing.. would it be bad if you were to slap their hand?
You don't have to slap them, just move their hand away. If he's a good guy, he'll take a hint and it shouldn't interrupt the mood.
15/f
Well, the past week has been soccer tryouts and when we ran i was always last. (and i kinda have a low self asteem) so that didn't make me feel good. and i think the only reason i made the team was because i'm a goalie, where on the team the only goalies are me and someone else. and then right now i just want a specail guy just to talk too. i mean i don't really think i want a boyfriend i just want a guy to be there for me when i'm down and just tell me i'm beautiful. and i've been stressing with school because all my friends are super smart and i kinda feel that i need to be smart too. because right now i'm like 180 out of 430 something where as my friends are all in the ranking from 80-1. and i don't know just right now i've felt unhappy almost lost. i mean i'm happy i'm on my highschool soccer team but then most the time i'm like man i hope coach doesn't make us run too hard because i suck at running. and then with the whole boys thing i feel left out cause again most my friends have a boy to call at night. and then school..ugh. but i don't even know if anyone can help. but i just feel so lost right now and unhappy and again i just don't know. so if anyone has suggestions on what to do or anything please. i'd be thankfull for any advice.
It helps during times like this to be thankful for the things you have. You may not be in the top 80 of your class, but 180 is WAAY smarter than, say, 425. The important thing is to try your hardest and do the best you can. If that's the best you can do, be proud of yourself and your accomplishments. Same thing with soccer. Be thankful you made the team. As for the running part, look at the positive side: the more you practice running, the better you'll get at it. Plus it's great exercise.
Something I don't understand is why you need to have a boy in your life to make you feel good about yourself. Maybe you should try making new friends that make you happy. The ones you have now just make you feel insecure and inferior. Friends should feel like equals. Not people that make you feel stupid and less confident about yourself.
If you want to be happy, work hard, stay positive, and do the things you love. The rest will fall into place. And, trust me, DON'T rely on a guy to make you feel confident about yourself. I am saying this from experience, most guys at your age are simply too immature and heartless to be someone a girl can rely on for support.
Okay so ive been with this guy for about 6 months and well, we've been getting more physical as time goes on. Last night, as previous nights, he inserted his penis, not all the way however. well that's what he says anyway. I mean it hurt and everything but as I started to pull him into me he stopped me and said "no, don't put it in all the way." Does this mean we are still both virgins? Another thing is that he likes oral but im not too crazy about it. Ive told him before that im not too comfortable with it and he said he was fine with it, but when we're in the moment he starts to beg for me to give him oral. what do i do?
Neither of you are virgins anymore. It doesn't matter if it wasn't in all the way. Either it's in or it's out.
As for the oral, if you don't like it, don't do it. It's that simple. There are other ways of making him feel good without giving oral, such as a handjob or dry humping.
Another thing you could try is the 69 position. Perhaps if he is giving you oral at the same time, you'll feel more comfortable giving it to him. It's worth a shot and if you don't enjoy it, you don't have to do it anymore.
i feel like im getting sick, probably just a cold or something. my throat is sore and my nose is a little runny and thats usually what happens first when i get a cold. its not allergies because i take allergy medicine daily. is there anything i can do to avoid this before it comes full on? or do i have to wait it out?
DRINK LOTS AND LOTS OF TEA!!!!!!!
Have tea when you wake up. Have tea with your lunch and dinner. Have tea before you go to bed. Have it whenever possible!
I swear that it will stop whatever illness you're getting in its tracks.
Try Lipton green tea. Make sure it's nice and warm (so it can soothe your throat), but don't ruin it's effects by adding a bunch of sugar. If you want it to be sweeter, add a teaspoon of honey and nothing more.
my friend is wicked clingy. i can't go ANYWHERE without her up my ass. the thing is she has loads of friends that she hangs out with but when i try to hang out with other people, she tries to make me feel really guilty about it. i want to distance myself but i'm not sure how. help. :(
Tell her the truth. Say you enjoy spending time with her every now and then, but you'd appreciate it if you could have some space to see your other friends. If she really is a true friend, she'll understand and back off. There's nothing mean about it and if she does happen to take it the wrong way, she needs to grow up and realize that she is not the only person in your life.
Ok, i broke up with my ex-boyfriend about a month ago
but lately we've been talking, and ive deveploped feelings for him again.
Should i get backtogether with him, or not?
You need to remember that you broke up with him for a reason. I don't know the whole story, but I'm sure there was a big reason as to why you two broke up. I say just be friends with him.
hey im 14/f
i know that theres NO way your boobs can just start growing faster unless you have surgery.
but are there any tips to make them look a little bigger? like certain clothes or something??
im a 34A
Push-up bras can work WONDERS. And v-neck shirts can help emphasize your breasts as well.
im looking for a xanga/myspace website that can give me a whole bunch of things/objects that move around that i can put on my myspace. thanks.
im looking for preppy stuff by the way. =]
I'm not sure if this is what you're looking for, but you can use the MARQUEE HTML tag to get things to scroll across the screen. Here is an example:
Put what you want it to say here.
This also works for pictures.
Put the HTML tag for the picture here.
You can find cute preppy pictures on a Google image search.
Let me know if you need help understand the HTML tag.
how can i be energized and up in the morning..
like i already take showers in the morning. and yeah. like what else will get me up in the morninggg. thankss
Listening to music you like in the morning might help. As soon as you wake up, switch on your favorite song and get up and start moving. Think about eveything you need to get done that day and keep those thoughts running through your head. That should keep you up and moving. The best way to make sure you're not as tired in the morning is to make sure you go to bed at a decent time. Make sure you allow yourself to get AT LEAST 6 and a half hours of sleep each night. That will help GREATLY.
I'm 14/F. The last time I got my period was the first two weeks of January. Now it's early March. I haven't gotten my period latley. My breasts are sore, that is all. I don't have abdomnial pains either. Also, I haven't been been doing sexual intercourse. I'm really nervous, what is wrong?
I got my period when I turned 12...now it's about 2 1/2 years since I've got it. Can my period still me irregular?
-Scared
Don't worry. Absolutley nothing is wrong. Every girl is capable of having irregular periods throughout her teenage years. Just be patient and you'll get it again eventually.
iam a girl, 17 yrs old from UK, indian and doing my sixth form at school. i like this guy (he is indian as well) at school but not sure if he likes me. we r together in many lessons. he sits with his friends at the front and i sit with m friend on the second row. today i looked at him and saw that he was looking at me but when i did he just turned it has happened like this a couple of times. my friend and i used to tell each other that "he like you" and i think she has started to like him as well. whenever i look for him she does as well. iam scared may he looks at her and not at me. in class she always asks me if i have seen him. but both of us have never spoken to him. we both are shy and quiet, never speak with anyone except with each other at school. i just want to know how to find out if he likes me.
The only way to find out if he likes you is by talking to him. First, try to at least get to be friend with him. Go up to him and ask for some homework you missed or ask him if he might be able to help you on a certain problem because he seems really smart. That way, you two can at least start talking. Once you feel that you have gotten to know him well enough, invite him, his friends, and your friends to the movies so you guys can all hang out.
When you make advances at him, if he accepts and helps you out, then I'm sure there is a chance he likes you.
There's no other way of knowing other than getting to know him better.
15/f. first of all is it weird that i'm in 9th grade and i like an 8th grader? anyway the guy i like is super nice to everyone but the problem is that he has a girlfriend. his girlfriend goes to another school so i don't actually know her but i heard that she can be a realy b****. anyway i've started talking to him afterschool and he is so nice to me and a lot of the time he seems like he's flirting with me. like the other day he hugged me, and he is always asking me to come with him and follow him if he goes somewhere. then when i sit down he always sits next to me and then leans in real close (its kinda ackward actually lol). well we are in the play together and he was trying to twirl this one girl. and the girl messed up and he was jokingly like i bet megan (thats me) could do better and he like held my hand and twirled me. it was so cute and he like randomly will like put his arm on your back if he is standing next to you.
ah omg its so weird becaues it seems like he's flirting but then i remember that he has a girlfriend. what can i do?
The trouble with guys is that sometimes it's hard to tell when they're flirting with you or just being your friend. In this case, since the guy in question is friendly with everyone, I'm thinking he sees you as just a friend. Plus, since he has a girlfriend, it's really not your place to come between them. Is it wrong to like him? Of course not. Love knows no age.
Why don't you do this: next time you think he's flirting with you, and you two are at least out of earshot from other people, ask him if he has any feelings for you that are more than friendly. If he asks why, be honest with him. Say you sometimes feel like he's flirting with you and you wanted to know how he really felt. If it turns out he was just playing, laugh and tell him nevermind you were just curious. That way you two can at least be friends and maybe one day they'll grow into more.
I hope this works out!
Does anyone know any really good instrumentals? I can only find a few...the only ones i found are ones by blink 182 so can any one tell me some other really good ones?
The ones for Yellowcard are AMAZING! Try looking up and listening to "Three Flights Up" by them.
Okay so me and my b/f have been going out since March 1st. and liek I really like him I do. We have only kissed 2 times. But for some reason i'm kinda scared to make out wit him ( no he is NOT my first boyfriend, and i HAVE made out plenty of tiems) But for some reason I am. I'm scared to hang out with him alone. Like I always want a friend with me. I DONT KNOW WHY!!
but can someone help me ??
becuase i dont know how not to be scaredd lol.
There is a difference between like someone and actually knowing them. It sounds to me like you just need to get to know your boyfriend. After all, you two just started dating. The first month or so should be spent getting to know each other, not making out.
Instead of sitting around at home alone with him, go out bowling, to the movies, putt putt golfing, out to dinner, anything fun! Having fun together is the best way to get to know someone.
As soon as you two start doing those things together and making some wonderful memories, I guarantee 100% that you'll be ready to be a bit more intimate and make out.
Im going to try and make a long story short.
I like this boy, ive liked him for a long long time now.
We used to hangout and all that led to us having sex and stuff.
Most of his friends ,dont like me.
All of them are mean to me.
They call me names and whatnot, but thats because im a pushover and i dont do ANYTHING to stop them.
The boy i like, is nice to me when we are alone.
But in front of his friends he's rude and stuff and he wants me to think he hates me in general.
His best friend told me that he honestly likes me, and thinks im pretty but just acts like he hates me to be cool like his friends.
His best friend said that he wants me to think that he hates me, which I do get that vibe.
The Boy i like is constantly trying to get my attention but at the same time he has a girlfriend.
His bestfriend said he likes ME and The girlfriend.
I dont talk to the boy i like, at all anymore.
I used to talk to him on the phone,aim,myspace,hangout all the time.
Now its maybe two words, but hes always trying to get my attention by saying mean things to me.
Please dont tell me to get over him because if he honestly does like me, I want my chance eventually!
I just dont know what to do anymore, its very hard to talk to the boy I like,; so i dont know if I'll be able to do it.
Can anyone help?
This might be hard for you to accept, but please allow me to explain before you start hating me.
The boy you like is a complete jerk.
He is NOT a good guy AT ALL.
No girl deserves a boyfriend that will treat her that way ANYTIME OR ANYWHERE!
Even if he does like you, he has a horrible way of showing it. Don't waste your time on a guy like him. If he's rude to you in front of his friends now, what makes you think he'll stop even if you two go out?
In my opinion, I don't think he will ever go out with you, simply because he needs to impress his friends. Even if he does like you and think you're pretty, he seems WAY to immature because of the way he acts around you.
You don't have to put up with hearing all those mean things. It's not worth it. I promise you that there are WAY better guys out there. Guys that will treat you with the utter respect that you deserve. Guys that will be proud to show you off in front of their friends.
All you have to do is convince yourself that you deserve a guy like that. Yes, that involves getting over the boy you like now. Yeah, it is really hard getting over someone like that. I never said it wasn't. But I am saying that it is something you NEED to do for your own good.
DO u have a sn????????????
Yes I do. It's for AIM and it's Obsdabeff07. I'm not on there as much as I am on here though.
when you have sex is it really necessary to be on the pill and have the guy wear a condom? or is it safe enough to just have a condom
It's the best way to avoid getting pregnant, other than abstinence. Many girls can, and have, and will get pregnant by thinking they are safe just by using the pill. Unless the guy can control himself and not finish inside the girl (which is very rare and many guys say they can but they really can't), then a condom is a definate must. Better safe than sorry.
Sometimes it is safe enough just to have a condom, as long as you use them correctly and they don't break. I would suggest trying different brands and not letting your partner finish (or cum) until you find a condom that will best suite your needs.
I am 13 and Well i have a bf and he is the best bf i could ever have but we havent kissed yet. I dont care or anything but he said when hes ready he will do it. Im ok with tht but Im really scared when hes going to do it and if im going to be good a it.
I just need to know if i should kiss him 1st or really wait for him????
Another thing is I have a girl best friend and a guy best friend and there dating each other. Thts not it but. They always make out everywhere when Im with my bf and it get annoying. It makes me feel weird becz I havent kissed my bf yet.
And on one field trip we had they were making out on the bus and like touching each other everywhere and me and my bf were just sitting there with his arm around me. They keep on telling him to kiss me and it gets annoying. I just want him to do it on his own and mi girl best friend keeps on telling me that hes a bad bf becz he hasnt kissed me yet. It just gets annoying becz she doesnt support me at all. I just wish they would leave me alone. What should I do on this whole situation.
PLEASE HELP ME.
Tell your friend to grow up and have some respect
for the people around her. No one wants to see her and her boyfriend make out. It's rude and disgusting. Short, quick kisses are okay in public, but nothing more.
Kissing is a personal, intimate thing between a couple. It's none of your friend's business and make sure you tell her so. If she's really a good friend, she'll stop bugging your boyfriend about not kissing you. It's VERY immature and she is most likely making the two of you uncomfortable, which can delay your first kiss even longer.
Now, if you really want to kiss your boyfriend, do it! I'm quite sure he'll be happy you do. Then again, if you'd rather that he'd do it, give him lots of opportunities.
Just a few ideas to try:
When you're watching a movie, at home or a theatre, sit close to him and link your arm around his. Randomly look up at him, smile, and say he's cute or any other compliment you can think of. Make sure your faces are close when you do it. I'm sure he'd be VERY tempted to kiss you then!
Or, let's say you two are hanging out at the park. Walk around with him, hold his hand, and be cute and flirty. Then, do the same thing I told you earlier, just stop, look him in the eye, and say something really sweet.
I'm not sure if you guys say "I love you" yet, but that's one thing you could say. You could also say something like "You're amazing" or "You make me sooo happy."
If all else fails, just give him a peck on the lips yourself when you feel the time is right.
Good luck!
-EDIT- No problem I'm SO glad I was able to help! I have had friends like that in the past and I hated them for doing that to me.
i've been trying to eat a healthy lunch to help lose some weight. This is what I ussauly bring.
~1 banana
~light yogurt
~ 1-2 pb&j sandwiches OR a small sub with
cheese, no fat mayo, and green olives
~fruit juice of some sort
~ and sometimes I'll buy a lil bag a pretzels
Am I right the right track to being healthier and skinnier? If not what should I fix.
It sounds like you're eating the right foods. Just make sure to avoid snacking, which is a really hard habit to break.
Whenever you eat, make sure to take small bites, chew very slowly, and allow your body to tell you when it's full. Take a sip of your drink inbetween each bite, too.
If you really want to lose weight, I'd replace your sandwhich with a bag of carrots or celery or whatever veggie you like the most. Having that much bread can really cause issues when you're trying to lose weight.
okay so theres a new boy at school and daaaaamn hes fine!!! hes been in school for a week now and he is real quiet...i mean i know im not the prettiest girl in school but i think i could a chance with him and i want him to be atracted to me...i want to get to know him better but i have no classes with him and ive only talked to him like once.
what should i say?
what should i do?
how do i start a conversation with him and keep it going?
heres some backround on him hes kind of a thug-cholo-gangster,and hes 14...i need help bad to win a guy like that
oh my gosh hes soo cute i need serious advice that will accualy work for this type of guy...hes not emo,punk rocker,prep,or jock...hes a gangsta okay peeps so gimme advice on a thug boy and how to win that type of guy for me k thanks
Well, since he's the new guy in school, I'm sure he's looking for some support. Why not go ask how he likes it at the school? See if he wants to know where the good places are to hang out around town. Invite him out with you and your friends so he can meet some new people.
Your confidence will attract him to you and he'll be greatful that you're helping him out.
As for the whole thug thing, ask him about what kind of music he likes. Then tell him you were looking to spice up your CD collection and ask him to go to the CD store with you to help you pick some things out. It's the perfect to get to know what kinds of things he's really into.