about

I am 48 years old (yes that's old compared to some of you).


I have worked in nursing and/or healthcare management positions for 24 years. Primarily OB, Neonatal, Mental Health, Occupational Health and Geriatrics. In Jan 2008 I started my own business to board horses and do equine/human education. I am also a certified dog trainer.


I've been around the block so to speak and seem to be always helping others. I've been told that the reason people seek me out for advice is that I am approachable and caring. But on the same token even though I consider the person's feelings. I tell it like I see it. I've dealt with people in trouble with the law, dysfunctional families such as those with abuse & marriage problems. Not to mention problems with employees and employers.


I don't ever claim to know it all, and always keep an open mind.

advice

40's(f)I have a phobia of vomiting, me or other people. I have tried counselling, hypnotherapy, NLP and confrontational therapy. Nothing has worked. I have run out of ideas on how to beat this. Does anyone have any other suggestions on things to try and has anyone had this problem and got rid of it? If so, how? Thanks.

I had a friend that was this way...maybe she still is I am not sure. Even as a nurse, there are times it bothers me, but it must not be a phobia because I deal with it. It's a combination of the sound, smell and seeing it. It often makes me gag. It stimulates sort of a reflex where my mouth starts watering and my nose runs.

Try some tricks that nurses use:
If you have to clean it up..like in the case it's your own or kids etc. Put a little peppermint extract right under your nostrils (I have heard of using vicks too) Suck on an ice cube..wear a mask, goggles and gloves, and turn your head..look as little as possible.

If you witness it happening leave the room, if not possible, turn around, plug your ears and hold your breath as long as possible!

The best defense is a proper offense!

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I am now 16. When i was in 7th grade i started cutting my wrists....in 9th grade a was "an alcoholic" after i got over drinking i started taking pills...and this year...i started vomitting after every meal. I need help i know...but how do i get it and where...my sister is 17 and pregnant and just recently left home to her 38 yr. old bf "she ran away" my mom is so carring....she doesnt know i do this and it would kill her if i told her because she is under so much stress...i dont have many close friends because i have a bf and i spend all my available time with him.....he doesnt know either i alwayz wear long sleeved shirts and i always say i have to pee after i get done eating...now it is such a habbit that when i eat"if i eat till im full" it starts comming up on its own and i cant control it...its too late...plz someone tell me what to do????

Confused!

Hi,
You may think that you have a lot of issues to deal with, but I think it can be summed up into one. You seem to have an addictive personality. You give up one addiction and destructive behavior for another. This can be caused by a chemical imbalance in the brain, and can be helped with medication and therapy combined. I recommend that no matter how hard your Mom will take it, you need to tell her. Tell her you are willing to get help and work to overcome your problem.

Hopefully there is professional help available in a nearby town. At the very least, a 12 step program like AA may help you overcome your addicitions--even though your addiction at the moment is not alcohol, most programs operate on the same priniciple. It's completely confidential and they can't tell anyone that you are going to the meetings. If you have to lie to get there, fine...the important part is that you get help in one form or another before it ruins your life forever.

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iam 18 yrs old.male. my problem is that i need around 10 hrs of sleep everyday.and sometimes even more than that.and ive heard that people of my age shoul not sleep for more than 7-8 hrs a day.ive tried doing that but then im not able to stop myself from having a nap in the afternoon. please advice on how to decrease "10-12" hrs to "7-8" hrs of sleep.

Actually if you know that you need 10 hours of sleep each night, and you are not tired during the day with that amount of sleep, it's completely normal. If you try to change your sleep patterns you will not function as well throughout the day, even if you take a nap.

See this article:
http://www.helpguide.org/life/sleeping.htm

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There is this girl at my school that knows my boyfriend somehow and i think she likes him. He deosn't even know her that well but whatevr. Anywho she said she is going to call my boyfriend and tell him I'm cheating on him. well the thing is i'm not and i would never do that to him bcuz i love him so much. Idk who he will belive tho!!! wut can i do to stop her. and if she does tell him how will i tell him that i didn't cheat on him? I'll rate!!!!

Tell him about the girl, and what she plans on doing before she does it. That way he will be prepared to tell her that he already knows the truth.

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Okay Well A Few Days Ago I Was Doing 4 back hand springs and on my 4th i bent my finger back. It really bruised now and It hurts. Its not broke or prained but it hurts! And My School Tryouts for Cheerleading are REally soon and I want To Tumble For Tryouts! Any Ideas PLease Help. I Will Rate!

There's no way of knowing if you have a fracture without an x-ray. You should really go to the Dr, because if it is broken, or you ruptured a tendon it might not heal right.

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ok i was leaning behind my couch to get my dogs bone, and i must've leaned the wrong way on my chest becuase the place between my breasts, the bone, is hurting EXTREMELY badly. It happened after I leaned over, so its nothing to do with anything else. I heard a little crack when I leaned over, so could I have maybe fractured one of my ribs? My mom says no and it'll go away soon, but I really cant bear the pain. Please Help ♥

Yes, you could have fractured a rib, or injured cartilage or your chest wall muscle. Sometimes it doesn't take very much to do this. The wrong move with a twist and turn..and OUCH! I know people who have sneezed and fractured a rib!

No sense in suffering when you don't have to. Tell your Mom you need to see the Dr. because you are in severe pain and nothing seems to help.

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I have had braces for about 8.5-9 months now and so far, I'm not liking it. When I look at myself in the mirror, I don't think of myself as beautiful anymore, because theres disgusting metal on my teeth. Having braces has lowered my self esteem twice as much as my self esteem was before I had them. I feel like a dork and sometimes I even regret getting them. I've tried telling my friends and family about this, but they've all had them and they say their little stories just to make me feel worse. Even some of the kids in school teased me about my braces before. Like one guy had a metal pen in his hand one day and he told me to put it in my mouth, because it would shock my mouth, because I have stupid braces. I hate my life with braces. I just want my old life back! Every single kid in my school everyday is getting their braces taken off. It's like a school epidemic. The more kids who don't have braces, the more upset I get. Is this normal or do I have issues?

I was proud to have braces because when I was in Jr High it was a status symbol. There were very few of us that had them. It meant that our parents had enough money to fix our teeth and really cared about our future appearance.

I look at some adults now that should have had them as kids, and I know they must be ashamed of the way their teeth look. I don't regret it at all, especially when I see the teeth that other people have.

When kids tease you, just laugh with them..or you could have a comeback.

"At least I will get them off someday, but you will still be ugly" or

"All this metal in my mouth is like a reciever,I can normally read the intelligent brain waves of others, but I'm not getting any signal standing next to you"

You don't have issues, but just relax--and don't forget to smile :-)

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well i need major help
-i don't know what to do because my parents dont except me and i dont kn ow how to make them
-i have been grounded for 3 weeks because i didnt go to tutoring and they did it purposely to ruin my social life
-they even told me that they were taking my social life away.
-my friends are starting to know
-i feel like someone could shoot me and no one would care
-i used to hate school and love to come home, but now i would rather be anywhere than at home
-my mom makes me tell her about my feelings and then she goes and tells all of her friends
-i cant trust anyone now, not even my parents
-how can i make my life just a little better?

i will rate high and i need answers soon!

xXxheartbrokenxXx

I am sure that your parents love you very much, and that is why they "grounded" you. The parents that don't care, let their children go anywhere and do anything without any consequences at all. They wouldn't ground their kids because then they would have to be with them at home all the time.

They want you do good in school so you can be successful and happy later on, that is why tutoring is so important to them. So that's another thing that tells me that they care.

Even if your Mom tells her friends, continue to talk to her. Tell her how you feel about this and that you will do better next time. It's normal for Mom's to talk to their friends, it just shows that she is worried about you.

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i'm 16 years old and i am 7 months pregnet and me and my babay father who is 17 is still together and he has a job makin 9 dollas an hour i was wondering do you know of any programs that would help us get a place of our own

Organizations that I can think of are "Birthright"
"Catholic Charities" or "Luthern Social Services" .

You might also do a search for "Housing assistance" in your state.

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i think that i'm pregnat. the reason why is that my boyfriend busted and then i got on him and he put it in me. so am i pregnat or not. let me know please because i'm scared and i have all the smyptons.

If you have the symptoms of pregnancy, the only way to know for certain is to take a pregnancy test after you have missed your first period. If you are please get early prenatal care and make future plans as soon as possible.

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Well, I love horseback riding and I loove my horses to death. Well, the thing is they aren't really "my" horses but I lease both of them. (I ride/used to lease/love others but its mostly these two who I love the most). My trainer is having me show her mare this summer and I've been leasing her mare since September. We have a wicked strong bond and have come so far. However, the reason I started leasing her was because the pony I was supposed to lease was lame for almost the entire time I was leasing my mare up to the present time. We are pretty sure he's going to be better by the summer, and this summer I was supposed to go to our shows with him. He's so cute and funny and I love him so much. I know I can probably still ride both but how do I decide which one I want to concentrate on?

Lease the Mare--who I assume is a horse and not a pony.

Ponies don't rate as well in competition, and if he has been lame, working him to get ready for the show might be a little hard on him.

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What does it mean when you poop blood? Like seriously the whole toliet was filled with blood.

http://familydoctor.org/x2581.xml

See the link above.

Of course the bleeding will look like a lot more when it is mixed with water in the toilet. Darker blood that turns the stool nearly black and looks like coffee grounds is usually more serious than bright red blood.

However, it is not normal and deserves medical attention either way.

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I need advice on how to deal with a co-worker. She's a VERY nice lady, she has strange little quirks about her. Most of them I can deal with.

However, one quirk that drives me (and the rest of the office coincidentally) absolutely bonkers is her need to say "Hi!" all day long. I get the brunt of it, sometimes between 3-15 times a day. I sit next to her and share a printer with her, so a lot of the time, she passes by she says it. I've been subtle, I've been joking about it. I've even replied with "Hello AGAIN" and once told her "You've already said that." She responded with a laugh and said "I know. It's a habit." I don't want to hurt her feelings because she is a nice girl, almost fragile, but she needs to be told it's annoying as #$%@. She says it while I'm talking on the phone sometimes, she says it while I'm transcribing and I've even got earphones on. I ignore her sometimes, but some times she doesn't go AWAY!

PLEASE, any advice on how to approach this in a NICE way? HELP ME! I'm slowly going insane!!!!

I'm sorry, but your post has me laughing. You know, sometimes I can't handle the nicey nice "good morning sunshine" people. You could always respond with sarcastic remarks until she gets the idea she is annoying you.

When she says "Hi" you say "good-bye" or "No, not yet" or "low" or "water" "elevation" "note" basically anything that would go with the word "high"...if she asks "What did you say that for" say...Why did you say "Hi" AGAIN?

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Ok so I have been seeing this guys *Jim* for a little over a year and I really love him. We makeout all the time, he's gotten up my shirt and just today he fingered me many times and I gave him a blowjob. Now I know this may not seem like alot to you but for me it is and that might be just because I`m 13. Now I have a question would you consider me a slut? How much do you think he likes me. (I am his first girlfriend, first kiss, first everything)? please answer this i am so nervous and scared.

No, to me this seems like a lot. You didn't go all the way, but what you are doing with your boyfriend is serious stuff and should still be considered sex. (Just a different type). Are you aware of the risks? That might be a question you can post next time.

Are you nervous and scared that he might not like you? Apparently you don't know if he likes you a lot or a little, because you are asking us. See, this is the problem when young teenagers have sex. Before you engage in such behavior you should be sure of the level of committment first, and 13 year olds don't know that.

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i am getting bullied by a grade 9 at school. iam scared if i tell someone he will seek revenge and i don't have the confidence to stand up to her

Hi,
I don't know your age, or if the bully is a boy or a girl..you said He and Her...

Anyway, look the bully in the eyes and say "Who cares?" then ignore him/her. If the bully makes serious threats, you should tell the school counselor or the police. If he/she takes revenge, tell again. Don't stop until the bully stops!

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Has anyone on here ever played with a weegee board? If you have what was it like? Was is weird?? Honest answers please!

I know Christianity does not promote the use of a ouija board. They say it is calling up evil spirits and basically playing with the devil.

My son and I were talking about this last night because of a show we watched on the discovery channel. He said he saw something on TV that proved scientifically they do not work, when people had blindfolds on the planchenette (pointer) moved to letters and such that made no sense at all.

Personally, I don't want to risk playing with evil spirits...so I will stay away from one.

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I know this sounds incredibly stupid, but I am terrified of spiders! Everytime I see one near me, or even up in the wall in my room, I freak. I know this is considered a phobia, but as far as illnesses go...? I feel like when I see one they're on me all over and I have to get it off. Is there anything I can do about this?

I am of the opinion that to get rid of phobias is to face them head on! You might try visiting a pet store and holding a spider to help overcome that fear.

I have heard that some people achieve success in overcoming phobias with hypnosis.

My mom used to tell me.."they are more afraid of you than you are them"

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in school usually the class before i have lunch, my face gets really hot, i dont know what this is but it happens sometimes and it gets really annoying because my face gets BRIGHT red. its not that im nervous, or anything because its usually a study hall. so what could this be? and how can i stop it?

My nephew had this before he was diagnosed with diabetes.

Are you taking any over the counter medications? Do you have any allergies? Does this facial flushing run in your family? Are you drinking enough water? (8-10 glasses per day)

I know people who are Irish, and have a lighter ruddy complexion who flush easily, but it doesn't mean anything is wrong.

It would be a good idea to speak with your Dr about this to rule out any health conditions because this can be a symptom of many things, then again it may be entirely normal, but you really need to be sure.

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I have strep throat, a pretty bad case of it too cause I waited a while before I got meds for it. I haven't eaten much in days simply because my throat hurts to bad to swollow anything more then my own spit. I've had countless bottles of water trying to sooth the pain and keep my throat moist however I'm still in great pain.
Is there a good drink ( besides like Tea, it's really sensitive to heat right now, I tried tea already) that will help sooth the pain enough so I can talk and eat temporarily? Thanks! :)

Oh yes..the pain is horrible. I have used sucrets or you can also get the chloroseptic throat spray to help with the pain. For now forget the hot liquids, other than gargling with warm salt water. Try sucking on ice chips which will help with the swelling and pain. Jello also works well because it can kind of slide down without much effort.

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15/f... I have a really abnormal period and horrid cramps(the doctor has put me on birth control and perscribed me vikodin for the pain of my cramps)My mother had Ovarian and cervical cancer when she was pregnant with me (Which she was supposed to get taken care of before she was pregnant)and I have had papsmears and they came back negative for cervical cancer but the doctor wants to do tests to make sure i dont have any other cancers in my ovaries or to make sure i dont have endometriosis (sp?). Could I have possibly got whatever is wrong with me b/c my mom had that stuff when she was pregnant (before & after) with me? Also, I'm really scared of what the test results will be and if I have either ovarian cancer or endometriosis can I die from it or can it cause other situations down the line? And if I were going to have sex would that make it more complicated?

Sorry This is so long I'm really confused and need help. I will rate high for descent answers...

ALIX

Hi,

Your Mom's pregnancy with you would not be a factor in your condition. However, if your Mother had ovarian cancer you have a higher risk of developing it because it does run in families. If you are getting tested for ovarian cancer and it's negative, you may speak with your Dr about special testing to determine if you are at risk for developing it later on. Go to this link to learn more:

http://www.ovarian.org/

The previous advice giver gave you a link for endometriosis, so I won't duplicate that part.
Endometriosis alone is not life threatening.

Sex will make neither of those conditions more complicated. However it may affect pregnancy, so you will need to discuss this with your Dr when he/she gives you your test results.

Of course you are scared, but with any condition (cancer or otherwise) early diagnosis can lead to a higher success rate when it comes to treatment. So this is good news, and you are doing the right thing by getting tests done. Knowing what's causing your symptoms is more than half the battle.

Keep this in mind:

Real difficulties can be overcome, it is only the imaginary ones that are unconquerable. (Theodore N. Vail)

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