I don't believe that 16 is too young to be in love. I say this because I'm 15 and I have been love.

I can't be exactly sure whether you are in love with this guy or not, simply because: I am not you.

To me, it actually sounds less like love and more like infatuation. However, the fact that you've had feelings for him for four years changes that a bit, as I would think you might have gotten over the infatuation by then.

Infatuation is when it feels like your whole life is consumed by your feelings for this person. It's almost as if you have an addiction to them. When I was infatuated with someone, I sounded a whole lot like you. He was ALL I thought about, ALL I talked about. I daydreamed about him constantly and it was seriously effecting everything I did. Like you, I couldn't focus or concentrate on school at all. I cried over him all the time. But I wasn't in love with him.

I want you to ask yourself these questions:

Do you know him very well?
Have you seen him at both his best and worst? (emotionally, mentally and physically)
Have you known him for a long time? (well I already know the answer to this but..)
Have you had feelings for him for a long time?
Do you feel comfortable confiding in him?
Do you feel as if you have to keep him safe? (for example, you worry about him when he's cold or upset or angry or in danger, almost in a motherly way.)
Say you can only save two of the people you know, would your mind automatically jump to him?
Do you feel protective over him?
Do you want him to adore you?
Do you feel sexually attracted to him?
Do you feel comfortable around him?
Does it just feel 'right' when you are together?
Do you two have a connection?
Does him being happy make you happy?
Do you think your life would feel empty if he were not a part of it?
Have both of you changed during the time you have known him?

And probably most importantly:

Is his happiness the most important to you, even if you are NOT a part of it? (for example, if someone said to you, in order for him to be happy, you cannot be a part of his life, would you stay out of his life even though it hurts you to do so?)

I think if you can honestly and genuinely say yes to all these questions, then you are probably in love. If you can't, then get to know him better and then ask yourself these questions again to see if your feelings have changed. However, if you DO say yes to all these questions, you have to know for sure that that's how you feel. It depends on how long you have felt that way.

Please feel free to ask me any more questions if there's something I havn't been quite clear about.

x

I definitely think you should take both Business Studies and Media Studies. I take Media and it involves a lot of work to do with advertisment, target audiences, meanings behind advertisments and persuasive writing. Seriously, it would help so much with advertising, you do a lot to do with it.
I'm also pretty sure Business would help a lot, I don't take it so I don't know that much about it, but a lot of my friends do, and from what I've heard, it would definitely help with advertising.

I have to say, I would be very surprised if he doesn't like you. Everything he does suggests that he likes you.

So what are you waiting for? I would suggest trying to spend a bit more time alone, just you and him. For example, if you need to walk somewhere (anything, like when you're with your friends and you just wanna go get a drink etc.) ask him to walk with you. Make excuses for why you need to see just him (for example, you want him to help you with something he's good and you're clueless about, to work together on work for a class you're both in, or because you both share a love of the same tv show and you could watch it together at yours etc.)

After doing this for a while, TELL HIM YOU LIKE HIM. It is the obvious thing to do, you've liked him for ages and it seems that he likes you too, so there's no point wasting time. If you don't want to do it in person, talk to him on msn/aim, after talking to him for a while, say you need to tell him something, and then tell him how you feel. But don't say how long you've liked him, just in case it'd freak him out, you need to appear kind of casual about it. Hopefully he will then tell you he likes you too.

Don't expect that you will become boyfriend/girlfriend straight away, but increase the amount of time you spend alone together, and when the time is right, kiss him. And it won't be long before you are together.

I would be VERY shocked if it turns out he doesn't like you, but if this is the case, then you will have to tell yourself to move on. I know this is extremely hard to do, but it's better than pining over someone you can't have,

Feel free to ask any questions concerning the subject, x

With love, you can never say anything's impossible. I think (and I say this from experience) that truly loving someone when you've never actually met them is a lot less likely to happen than truly loving someone when you see them a lot, at their best and worst and interact with them face to face. However, I am not saying it's impossible and I do think that you can find love online. Several of my friends met their boyfriends/girlfriends online, however if they don't see each other much, it seems a lot less real.

I don't think you can truly know if you are in love with someone if you've never met them. I think you can know that you love them, from talking to them and finding that you care about them and understand each other, but you can't know exactly which type of love it is. For example, you can talk to someone online and really care about them, and even think you are in love with them. But then when you meet up with them, you might realise that there's no real chemistry or you simply don't feel attracted to them, and that you only love them as a friend. It's easy to think you love someone as more than a friend when you only speak to them online, because you know that you click and you care about them and you flirt and you understand each other, but you don't actually know if you have any chemistry till you meet up with them, so you assume that you are right for each other without knowing for sure.

I still think it is possible that you could fall in love without ever meeting the person, but I think it is best to meet them after a while so you know for sure.

I think I do believe you can fall in love at any age. I can't be exactly sure, but I'm 15 and I KNOW that I have been in love. Without a doubt, I know. I guess I can never know for sure, but yeah, I think you can fall in love at any age.

x

I know exactly how you feel. I'm the same as in I'm very shy and don't talk much in quite a few of my classes, so people have a preconceived idea of what I'm like, which is completely untrue. I also know how you feel about the guy, I'm having the same kind of problem right now, and your shyness is probably getting in the way.

I think that maybe this guy is shy too and that's why he's looking over at you all the time, but not actually doing anything. He may not like you, as you said he hasn't made a move, but just because he knows you think he's hot, doesn't mean that he would definitely make a move. He might think that it doesn't really mean anything, you just think he's hot. However, I am more leaning toward thinking he IS interested you, due to the fact that he keeps staring at you and also because he stared at you BEFORE he found out you think he's hot. I'm pretty sure he's interested, and is either just shy, doesn't know how to make a move, or is waiting for you to make a move.

I would suggest that next week, you make eye contact and smile at him when he looks at you. Also, always make sure you look gorgeous and stand up straight etc. Wear perfume and subtly brush past him in the hallways. After these few hints, he might make a move. Although it is equally likely that he will just return the eye contact, smiles and brushing past. And he most likely will if he's into you. Don't think that he's not if he doesn't though, as he may be shy or not confident enough to know what to do.

After this, I'd suggest that you hang around with your best friend if she goes and talks to her friend and the guy you like. Try to make amusing comments that fit in with the conversation, and try to say at least one thing which is directed to him. (You could ask your best friend to do this with you, rather than just waiting until she does.)

After a couple of these times, see if you can find him online and then add him on msn/myspace/bebo/facebook etc. and start chatting to him. Be casual but slightly flirty.

After this, ask your best friend to ask her friend who's friends with this guy if him/her and his/her friends (make sure she says names, and includes the name of the guy you like) wants to hang out with her and her friends (which obviously includes you)sometime. I would suggest going to your nearest town with a cinema. You can spend the day all hanging out, but hopefully it won't get awkward because you will have a set thing to at some point in the day - going to watch a movie at the cinema. It would be good if you could sit near him, make eye contact with him every now and then and make conversation.

Hopefully after a while you will get to know him more. It will definitely help if you can chat to him on msn. If he doesn't have msn, you could ask your friend for his number, although this can be a bit risky, as it is a lot more personal than his msn address.

After a while of hanging out with him with friends, you should feel comfortable (of if you don't, just make yourself do it anyway) saying hi to him at school, or stopping to ask a question every now and then.

Hopefully it will go well from there. If you have any more questions now, or when you're attempting my above suggestions, or once you've completed them and are wondering what to do next, don't hesitate to message me and ask anything you want.

x

I definitely don't think it's slutty for a 17 year old to have sex with someone they're not in a relationship with.

I guess that if you started having sex with every guy who shows the slightest bit of interest in you, no matter whether you are attracted to them or not, then that is kind of slutty. But mostly, I think you should just do what you want.

If you're attracted to the guy and you want to have sex with him, then do it. However, I would suggest that if you really like the guy and would like to have something more serious with him, wait a while before having sex with him. But if it's just a casual thing and you're interested in the guy, then sure, it's fine to have sex with him. Just do what you want and have fun.

I think you just have to not be stupid about it - only have sex with guys you're attracted to, not just any old guy; use condoms; and don't let guys force you into it. You can have casual sex with guys and still have respect for yourself, as long as you just do what YOU want. Seriously, just have fun.

Feel free to ask me any more advice on the subject, x

I'm not sure where you live but Camden market has TONS, it's where I got mine (:

You're 18, you can do what you want.
Try and talk to your mum and explain that these friends are close to you now.
If she still says no, then f*ck it and go anyway (:
x

I've looked around and it seems that the average price for getting your nose pierced in America can be anything from $30 to $50, although is more likely to be nearer the lower end of this price range.
I live in England so I tried to find places to get your nose pierced in Kentucky but I couldn't find any specific ones.
Where I live there is a little shop in town that does piercings in one part of it, I think the best thing to do would be to go to the nearest town/city and look around everywhere. You're sure to find somewhere that does nose piercings, though if you have time it might be better to find a place before the day you get your nose pierced. If you can't, then just do it on the day - get up early so you have a lot of time. Also, make sure you go to a fairly big town/city, not a small one.

I'm 14 and I'm the same. I don't know if it's a phase because I've been like it for a few years now, but quite a few of my friends are like it, so there's definitely nothing wrong with you.

Your Guardian Angel - The Red Jumpsuit Apparatus

In future you can type the lyrics into google with word 'lyrics' beside it and it will come up the name of the song and band.

Like,

"lyrics here" lyrics

I think it's fine to do it just once.
I smoke weed sometimes, not very often, mostly at parties or gatherings and I don't get really, REALLY stoned like some people. The effects generally seem to be getting the giggles, so you find pretty much everything funny, the muchies - meaning you get really hungry and just start eating everything, a dry mouth so it's best to drink water while you smoke it, and feeling relaxed and happy.
Doing it one time won't follow you your whole life. Doing it a few times won't follow you your whole life.
The only time it's going to start effecting your life is if you start doing it like every other day or every day.

You say you've been worrying that things are going to turn for the worse because you've never had a guy like this - to me it sounds as if you're worried that it's too good to be true.
And I know how you feel, like surely life can't be this good, something bad's going to happen soon, right?
But you have to stop thinking like that.
Think to youself that you deserve a guy like this. I don't know you and I don't know your boyfriend, so I can't really say whether your relationship's real or not, but if it feels so real...be happy with that, if it feels real to you just make the most out of the relationship and have a great time with your boyfriend. If things are going great for you at the moment, make that carry on. I'm sure the relationship will continue to feel real, and if you carry on with it; I'm sure you'll find out whether it definitely is or not. But if it feels real to you and him at the moment, I think that's all that matters.

I definitely think you should tell him. Your feelings for him are obviously causing a lot of problems for you. You need to tell him how you feel (although I wouldn't tell him you love him, just that you really like him) and ask how he feels about you. Until you know, it's going to keep on causing problems for you.
If he likes you too, maybe you two should take it slow and get together.
If he doesn't, at least you know he doesn't, and can try to get over him.
Although I know that's a lot easier said than done, I know how hard it is to get over someone. You have to spend time thinking about him and then make a decision to move on with your life and keep occupied, maybe make some changes and try new things, and hopefully you wil get over him.
If he likes you too though, then congratulations and see it how it goes!
xxx

I used to be like that when I was in primary. I remember going to the school discos and sitting at the edge and then going home and wishing I had danced.
The thing is, you have to try not to take things too seriously. Think of a party as a time to just HAVE FUN. To just let your hair down. Try to forget about what everyone else is thinking, because to be honest, they'll probably either be too busy enjoying themselves or too busy worrying what other people are thinking of THEM, to take any notice of how you dance.
And if they DO think you look silly, screw them! This is your life, who cares what they think?
Spend time each night dancing by yourself. Put some loud music on, and just go for it. You can start dancing silly at first, just do whatever you want. As you start dancing more, you'll get more used to it, and it will feel more natural when you go to a party.
And the next time you go to a party, get yourself in the mindset of having fun, and don't think about what anyone else is thinking.

It depends whether he was doing it jokily or not. From reading your question, it sounds like he's just using you for gum and chocolate.
But if he said it jokily, he could have just been, well, joking.
Spend more time with him and see how he acts next time you don't have any gum.
If he does it again, and not in a jokey way, I wouldn't consider him a friend.

Right, I understand how hard this is. BUT DO NOT TAKE HIM BACK.
You deserve better. He's cheated on you and broken up with you for this girl, who's to say he won't do the same again if you get back together?
And if you take him back, he'll think he can do whatever the hell he wants and he can always come running back to you.
I have a friend who dated this guy who done the same to her, and she's taken him back so many times now, and each time he acts worse and worse, because he knows he can get away with it.
You can't let this guy do that to you.
I know you love him, but if he's not treating you right, you're going to put yourself through too much by dating him again.

So, now, how to get over him...

Firstly, you're not going to get over him if you are constantly being reminded of him. I know it might be hard not to be if you are always seeing him around with his girlfriend, but you can at least make sure there's nothing to remind you at home. Get a box, then take everything around the house that reminds you of him (photos, cards etc.) and put them inside this box. Delete all his texts, but if you really want to, you could write any special ones down on a piece of paper and put them inside the box too. But then delete them.
Stop accidentally bumping into him, if you do, don't avoid him, just act normal, if you see him, you see him, if you don't, you don't.

Secondly, spend an afternoon looking through all the things in this box, remembering all the good times together, what you liked about him, focusing on how you met and how he made you feel. It may be painful, you may spend the afternoon in tears, but it is crucial that you do this before you can let go. After, watch a sad film until you've cried as much as you can. You need to let this out of your system before you can let go.

The next morning, attempt to stop feeling sorry for yourself. Plan a day with friends, doing something fun. And for the next few weeks make sure your diary's packed with fun things with your mates, and keep busy.

After this, you will feel stronger. But you may be starting to think, 'Was it all my fault?' or anything like that. This will probably sound silly, but write a letter, include everything you wish you'd said, everything you should've asked. But don't send it to him. It will help get things off your chest just writing it. If you want you can write his ideal reply, as long as it doesn't consist of getting back together.

Now, you should almost be over him. Be positive, list everything you'd like to achieve in the next month. Then try to do them. Remain optimistic and self confident, and you'll be fine.

Hope this helped, xxx

As you begin to spend more time with them, you will find you relax and act more like yourself, more fun and wacky.
If you're the type of person that tends to fade in the background around people they like (I am too) then maybe you should try wearing more unusual clothes, to give you an individual style and make you stand out from the crowd.
Like I said, you'll begin to act more natural and fun and wacky once you get to know these guys more, until then I woudn't try to act any differently or catch their attention (other than with your style) because you could come across as fake or attention-seeking.
If you're shy around guys you like, you could use this to your advantage by acting mysterious. If there are people around you being loud and wacky, these guys will be intrigued by a mysterious girl. Don't act as if you're completely not interested, but if you're quiet, then occasionally make eye contact with one of these guys, then look away before he does. Be a bit cool with them at first.
And I know this sounds cliched and it's not what you want to hear, but be yourself.
I always hated it when people told me that, but I've since found it really does work.
And you wil gradually become more fun around them.

Hate, I Really Don't Like You - The Plain White T's.

I think the chorus goes,

'Hate is a strong word;
But I really, really, really don't like you.
Now that it's over,
I can't see what I liked about you.'

Trust me, there's nothing wrong with you at all. I'm 14/f and I love Gossip Girl (although I havn't seen the show as I live in the uk, i read the books). And I know their life seems appealing.
Just remember that it is fiction, and when you get to high school, it's not going to be exactly like Gossip Girl.
Although I'm not TELLING you to drink or have sex, if you do everything safely (ie. don't drink too much, and don't drink all the time, have sex when you're ready and use contraception) it's really not that bad.
There are probably some article's on www.wikihow.com about this if you search Gossip Girl.
But yeah, there's nothing wrong with you and you don't have to worry about this, just try not to get too obbsessed and remember that it's fiction.

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