Gender: Male
Location: San Diego
Occupation: Football Player
Age: 20
Member Since: March 31, 2007
Answers: 174
Last Update: March 9, 2011
Visitors: 8439
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i am 20 my ex bf is 21. we were together for the pass two years. we were on and off for those two years for various reasons. we broke up this febuary and tried to be friends which didnt work because we spent all day together, talked to each other more than our friends, and were intimate but just didnt label ourselve bf/gf. we completly stopped all of this in march.
during our relationship, he wanted me to change some things to better myself and "our" future at the time. examples: like a better job, or move out, be more comfortable around his friends and family. (i was a shy girl).
three weeks ago, i was the one who texted him two weeks ago. we had lunch and he asked how i was doing and how my life was going. i told him i had found a much better job, i wasnt even looking just came across it from a friend and was hired. i went on his dream vacation and to a basketball game of his favorite team. i am even more open to people i meet and less shy, thanks to him. after lunch i asked to be friends, he said he couldnt handle it. he could never introduce me to anyone as his friend because he still loves me and cares for me too much. he couldnt even be my friend on facebook because he would get jealous and look at my fb stats. a week later we decided to be friends, he was hesitate at first but agreed to be actual friends this time.
then i told him my plan that i might move out because i am fiancially set now. he freaked out on me and said he cant be my friend. he thinks im doing this just to get back or make him jealous. he thinks i didnt make myself better when i was with him because i didnt care about him enough. he knows that its spiteful and he should be happy for me but he cant be. he said that im going to be the perfect girl and i will be with someone else so we cannot be friends. then he told me. "i hope whoever you marry, you have learned to love." this might have been out of anger when he saw me with a guy two nights ago.
i did grow up and mature from when i met him two years ago. but i am not doing this to make him jealous or to get him back. we had a lot of issues that we needed to work on and i think we are better off single or not with each other for now at least. i do love him and always will. he has helped me mature in so many ways and i have told him thank you numerous times, thats why i want him in my life as a friend. maybe years down the road we could be together but not now.
i just want to be his friend and have him understand that i am doing this for myself more then anyone else. i dont want him to be spiteful either but i know i cant force it on him and he has to do it alone...any word of advice?
Thanks
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First let me say that was quite a story to say the least. Anyway I have seen this kinda stuff happen before and you won't be the last to do so. It seems as if you need a change. Try seeing other people. Once you find another person you like the feelings for other people disperse. However that is just advice if you wanna get over someone and move on. It seems as if you really care about him and him about you. Don't write him off just yet but give it time. Time always heals things. If I didn't hit the issue please message me back I am glad to offer advice.
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There's this guy i like and i have no idea how to show him my true feelings for him. How am i supposed to get his attention? and how to get him to like me, and/or spend time with me? thanx xoxxoxxo (link)
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Honestly I think the best way is to flirt with a lot of guys. Especially his closest friends. That will put him in a competitive mood if they talk about you well. I have seen from experience and observation that girls who ignore guys get there attention. Also the key to remember is more people out there if this doesn't work out. There's really not much you can do to get a person to like you and who you like is mostly out of your control.
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Alright, I like a guy whos dating another girl... :\ shoot. Haha I am fifteen, gonna be a sophomore. He his sixteen gonna be a junior and the girl he is dating is eighteen gonna be a senior. Let's see... their past. They dated for quite a long time. People who knew him before said she kind of changed him, in a bad way. They broke up for about two months... He started dating this other girl who is the sweetest thing alive, she is so cute and nice but they broke up and he got back togehter with the other girl. But now he's kind of back who he was, like the breakup changed him back. He used to be really whipped but he holds his own now I guess haha. I think they're in love... They have sex and stuff but I know he doesn't expect it from her, and she was his first but she had slept around a bit before him. She really loves him, and I mean this girl is gonna be a senior so we aren't really friends but she takes me out to lunch sometimes and she really likes me, she kinda scares me tho haha. Anyway, I like him... And I hate liking him, I don't want to but I do. We hang out sometimes (in a group) and we'll text every so often, just as friends of course. I've never made a move on him but he flirts with me sometimes, it's completely innocent though because I think he really loves his girlfriend. Its just rough for me because I don't think they'll break up. Like they have a really intese relationship and whaat not and even if they do break up sometime soon I feel like I'd feel bad for dating him after... I don't really know though. Our school is super small so it's kind of hard to avoid dating someone your kind of friends with's ex... But she'll be going to college after this coming school year and maybe that would be a good time to attempt to start something? I mean, I'm pretty sure they'll break up before seh leaves but I don't know... I just don't know what to do. I really really like him. I have for about half a year... the guilt is rough but what can I do?? (link)
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I am gonna explain most of this in scientific terms because in all my years alive it is the one which makes the most sense. You like this guy because of biological reasons of course. It is a perfectly normal thing to feel attraction and don't feel bad for liking someone who is "taken". The only surefire was to get over him is to find another boy you are more attracted to. It may not be right away but soon it will happen just give it time. It's gonna happen. Once you find that new boy most, if not all, of your feelings for the old will disappear.
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My boyfriend and I have been together for a little over a month. The problem is I feel like I've lost that feeling of 'like' for him. I care about him tremendously and he is really good to me, but I just don't know what to do. I love hanging out with him and he makes me happy but I would feel horrible if I stayed with him for those reasons and not because I really liked him.
My question is did you lose that initial crush feeling you had with a boyfriend or girlfriend? Do you think I should end the relationship? Thank you! (link)
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I have learned a lot about human attraction from science because feelings can be understood in biological terms. It is a fact that brain chemicals that create romantic bliss disperse after a little while. No doubt in my mind this is what is happening. However I also don't doubt your boyfriend is a good guy who cares about you. I would not recommend breaking it off right away but remember all relationships based solely on attraction burn out to some extent. For a relationship to work there must be other reasons to stay together besides pure attraction.
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Female/ 15
What are ways to find out about a guy friend starting to become attracted to you? (link)
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First he will look happy whenever he sees you. At school or wherever, he will try his best to find you to talk or hug. He will also text you for no reason such as to say whats up or how ya doin, again for no reason. Also he will try to compose himself whenever you are around no matter how crazy he normally is. Also he might try to make you jealous or feel bad for him. Hoped that helped.
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i feel like theres a part in me that is empty if i dont have a gf, so u got any ideas how i could fill that gap? (link)
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One way to fill the gap is by finding great friends. I'm not talking about acquaintances or regular friends I'm talking about die hard friends. People who won't let you down in good times and bad. It's gonna be tough and it takes time to develop the bond but all worth it. Sports and video games help fill the gap too but not as well as friends.
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16/female
helloo.
umm if you read my past entries, ive had this crush on my stepbrother for a while now.
people have told me that im crazy its wrong but i dont know... im just confused. not only that but its gotten worse. im like falling for this boy. we have sooo much in common but at the same time we have our differences. & lately we've become comfortable with each other. considering that it used to be soo akward around each other. but its like the more i learn about him, the more im drawn to him. i havent seen him for about 4 months now & usually when i dont see him a long period of time, the feelings start to fade. but they've gotten stronger. & its driving me insane like i'll dream about him; every song i hear it reminds me of him; even movies & tv shows. its out of control..
i dont know what to do.
any advice?
is this wrong? (link)
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The only surefire way to forget about him if that's what you want is to find someone else that you are more attracted to. And don't worry about feeling weird about it I've done a lot of research and who you like is something that you can't really control. Once your genetics lock onto someone it's a hard feeling to shake. Best of luck though.
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i really like this guy alot & we where sorta best friends for a while until i told him that i fancy him. after that he ignored me and we also had a few fights about him ignoring me when i was drunk at a few parties. soo we recently talked about it calmly and he said that he does want to be friends again & that he made a mistake ( i also told him i dont fancy him anymore which isnt true to be honest :/ )
so since then we said hello to eachother again in the hallway & we also say hi when we have classes together. today he even stroked my hair. but the thing is that i wanna become really good friends again which is a lil hard because he has LOADS of friends & most of them dont like me which makes it really hard to talk to him while he's talking to them. and im also really shy.so how can i become better friends again? i dont think the time is right to ask if he wants to hang after school cause we still barely talk. what should i do? smile at him more or something? cause i often pretend like i dont see him or that im not paying too much attention to him cause i get really nervouss when he's around haha but i dont want him to think that i NEED him or anything.. i might give him the impression cause i dont have a lot of friends. (link)
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What I am about to say might not make you feel good but it is the truth. I know a lot of girls who crush on their best friend that's a guy. I know the guys they like and they tell me it gets awkward and kinda screws up the friendship. When I say this next part it's for your benefit. Either stop being his friend because it will suck to see him flirt with other girls which he will, or ignore you at times, which he will. Or find another boy you like better and remain friends. That's really the only options because anything else will lead to heartache. Hope you understand what I'm saying.
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so theres this guy i reeally like but he still likes his ex. but where quite good friends for a while but then it kinda stopped cause he knew that i like him. now since i told him that i dont anymore ( i lied :/ ; he told me that he stopped talking to me cause he didnt know how to handle the situation ) we talk again & he always gives me loads of eye contact, when we walk next to eachother we touch arms, when we have classes together he sometimes turns around to look/smile at me, he often smiles at me and everytime he sees me there's a spark in his eye. ive even been asked if we're going out so i guess im not the only one who sees it. so is there a chance that he maybe likes me back but doesnt know it cause he's so focused on liking his ex?? (he's liked her for a long time now but she has a bf and isnt interested)
is there any way to make him realise that i am likeable too? cause we have soo much in common & he really seems to like me as a person so ..
& he also often plays around with my hair haha
so is there a chance that he might like me back but doesnt know it?
& he did all those things before i told him i like him as well. he also continued keeping eyecontact when we didnt talk that much anymore. i like him soooo much & i cant get over him :/ (link)
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I see this kind of thing happen all the time. What you need to do regardless of what happens between the two of you is realize that there are more people out there that you will like. The only way to get over a person is to find someone else you like, maybe more. I mean all that emotion has to go somewhere right? Anyway the secret is not to get a certain boy to like you. It's to find that power within yourself to know that you are likable person and sooner or later a great guy who likes you back will come along. Anyway hope you dig my advice, I'm rooting for you.
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my bf randomly broke up with me because he needed space and time.He told me im the most amazing girl he's ever met and that im his first real girlfriend and ive put him through the relationship experience but now he sees me as a friend and wants to go out and experience his "high school life". We are on good terms and still hangout once in a while, but im still crazy for him.I can't stop thinking about him and i want to get over him or atleast show that im over him! tips!? (link)
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The only efficient way to get over someone is to find another person that you like better. I know that since you are still crazy about your ex that it might seem no one better will come along. From what I've experienced and seen for myself it always happens, a better one comes around soon. You just need to hang in there and keep your eyes open. It's a big big world.
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17/m
Ok, so I like this girl that I know. I told her I liked her a year ago, and she told me she had liked me, but not anymore. Well, now I like her again, and she sort of likes this other guy, but it's been awhile and nothing has really happend...anyway, I took her to prom and we had a good time, we danced a bit, ect...but I don't think she likes me in that way. Idk what to do. Should I just tell her how I feel? Idk, and if I do, how should I tell her..? (link)
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I would advise to go ahead and tell her how you feel. After all you will never know until you ask and if you don't you might end up wondering how it could have been with her. If she says yes great best wishes and if she says no it's not a problem. There are so many more girls out there you can't even imagine how many. Your also young have fun, play the field, being single is good too, no commitment. However, the only sure fire way to get over someone and forget about liking them is to find a new person you like better. Trust me a better one always comes along I guarantee it. And sooner or later a better one who likes you back will come along and then your set. Anyway take care man and relax, you only young once.
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my boyfriend broke up with me about 3 weeks ago. We recently started talking and hanging out a little bit.We hungout like three days during the school week but we didnt even speak the whole weekend.The times we hungout ,we had fun and had a good time. I just really want to get back together with him ,but he said he needed time. Do some guys really actually need time or do they just say that? I obviously don't want to wait my whole life for him to come back.What key things should i say? Ive never went through this before : ( (link)
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I see this kind of problem happen a lot. In all honesty he probably said that time thing as an excuse to get away from the situation. What you need to do is find someone out there that you like more. I know it sounds tough and a little uncomfortable buts its the only way to get over a person. You may think no one will be as awesome as him but trust me you will find another person it always happens. Plus it sounds like your young, have fun and enjoy life. A relationship is not always necessary to have a good time.
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(male/18) So my best female friend stayed the night at my house last night like she usually does a few times a month! but what started out as a soft neck massage.. ended up with us sleeping in the same bed and flirting and cuddling and talking ALL night..i think im starting to like her ALOT more then just a friend.... and she seems to feel the same way BUT she is really into (and practically dating) this other guy... im so bummed out cause 1)she is my best friend and i dont want to make a move or tell her anything that might make things awkward and 2) i care for her so much that i just want her to be happy wether we are just friend or we are dating.. i dont know what my next move is but all i know is i cant get her out of my head! PLEASE HELP! :/ (link)
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If she is truly your best friend you need to support her whatever her decision is, to be with you or another person. I see this kind of thing happen a lot. If she doesn't pick you the best thing to do is find another girl that you like more. It's the only efficient way to get over someone. Plus if your feelings get in the way of your friendship you might want to consider ending your friendship or not seeing her as often because noticing her with another boy will just make you feel like crap. It's stuck between a rock and a hard place but you have to push through it. Best of luck man.
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I'm in need of some adive here...
There's this guy I've known since 3rd grade, and we're in 9th going into 10th now. He's always been a friend to me but just about a month or two ago, I realized I really like him. A lot. After a while of texting him and stuff I told him I liked him and that I feel bad. He said not to feel bad because he likes me too, he just wants to hang out more.
He broke up with his girlfriend a couple months ago... and she's this girl in middle school. So he's single. We're close now and text every day and sometimes hang out.
What I would like to know is... should I talk to him about how crappy I feel because I like him so much and I wish we were together or should I not rush it, like rush into a relationship?
I really do not want this to end up badly because he means so much to me... so I'm not sure if I should rush things or what. Please give your thoughts =/ (link)
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First and foremost you don not need to rush things at all. You 2 have known each other for a good bit now and being in high school and all probably will be seeing a lot more. Just take things slow and let it happen naturally. What you need to do is realize that everything you are and will be does not depend on what happens with this boy. Your young just have fun and realize their is a whole world to explore. If it does work out though congrats you have my best wishes. Just don't stress out to much and have fun with it. You only in high school once.
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ok so there is this kid Ethan that i like but i dont no how to talk to him or flirt with him can you give me any advice. (link)
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there are 2 ways to approach this:
1. Wait for him to make a move on you. Don't flirt with him or he might be able to tell that you like him. Us boys are really good at that so ignore him.
2. Tell him how you feel. It will take guts but might pay dividends. Boys really like it when you show confidence and be open. Plus he might like you and didn't know you liked him back.
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my best friend is going to a school dance with my crush, but only as friends. He likes her, but she does not know her feelings towards him. I really like this guy, but i don't want to hurt my best friend either, what should i do... p.s. i need an answer FAST! thanks!!
pretty N confused (link)
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Give your friend the first chance. Friendships always last longer than relationships.
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why cant i have a gurlfriend (link)
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Why have just one girl when there are so many out there. If your young don't sweat it. Have fun and enjoy being single. They are the happiest people by far trust me I know. When you find the right girl you will know but in the meantime why lock yourself down.
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Here's the deal: I'm 17, almost 18 years old and I've never had a boyfriend. Is there something wrong with me? I feel like guys NEVER like me as anything more than a friend, and I've been discouraged so many times I don't know what to do. It's not like I don't have any experience with guys, I've made out with and hooked up with guys before (never slept with anyone though), but whenever this happened both me and the guy were always really drunk or high at a party. It's like I'm not good enough to actually be dated, and because I've never gotten close to anyone before while sober, I get really awkward and never know what to do. Is there something wrong with me? (link)
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Not at all. There is nothing wrong with you. I have noticed that people your age who don't have a serious relationship are the happiest. They get to experience life to the fullest and do what they want when they want without anything holding them back. I am the same way myself. Plus partying and doing all the stuff you mentioned is a fun part of growing up. Have fun while your young and don't worry to much.
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i have this cruch on a girl and i dont know what to do...... (link)
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Well ask her on a date. If she accepts and you have a good time keep it up and see where it could go. If she says no more fish in the sea. Trust me on this there are plenty of girls you will like on this planet.
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are there any really obvious signs when a guy likes you? What do they usually do when they're into a girl that they want to be more with than they are now? Does anybody have like a top 10 list of signs that he likes you? (link)
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1. he texts you randomly
2. tries to get your attention for no reason
3. smiles every time he sees you
4. looks you straight in the eyes
5. gives you random compliments, again for no reason
6. tries to touch you
7. tries his hardest to make you laugh
8. gets your best friend to like him
9. won't talk to you when other guys are around you
10. slurred speech when in a conversation with you
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