Hello, my name is Sam. There's a lot that I can say about myself, but if you'd like that then you could always message me and we can have a nice cup of tea together :D
I am not very old, so I might not have too much life experience, but I do like to help people. I know that life often throws unexpected blows at people, but I am so extremely optimistic. Hopefully some of my optimism will rub off on the people to whom I am giving advice. I am happy to help with anything! :)
Gender: Female
Location: California
Age: 17
Member Since: February 24, 2007
Answers: 477
Last Update: October 17, 2011
Visitors: 29137
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ive had a big crush on my best friend for the longest time. in feb, i told him how i felt about him and he told me that he couldnt commit and would rather just be friends. he kept giving off the wrong ideas to me because thats the way he shows affection, by hugging flirting ect. but he did not like me. basically i kept getting hurt because i kept wanting to believe he did and then got let down. until one day i told him i got over him (not entirely true).
ever since we've become best friends and earlier this month he confessed somthing to me. he told me that he was going through a phase where he wasnt sure of his sexuality, in other words he thought that he was gay. but he said that he realized that he is strait. and he told me that when i told him i liked him, he wasnt sure what to do because really he does care about me but he couldnt see me like that. but now things are so totally different. the only thing keeping us apart is fear, he is afraid or commitment. he said that he cant afford a relationship because well lets just say his first girlfriends broke his heart and his second one was too clingy. and he doesnt want to ruin our friendship i guess.
god if only he knew that i wont be like them.
i really like him and he doesnt even know about it. he really seems to like me too, i think. i mean he always sits next to me, puts his arm around me, grabs my hands and plays with them, hugs me- and then says he wants another hug, waits for me, wants to hang out with me all the time, makes fun of me- by calling me pet names, and the other day i saw him looking at me in class and when i looked at him he turned away.
i gave up all hope on him until he hinted that he might like me but obviously he isnt gonna put his feelings on the line because he thinks that i dont like him. if thats what he really wants i could stand just being friends, its not that bad actually. but i really do like him and well i want to tell him but i dont exactly know how to. do u think that if i threw major hints then he might respond? what are some good hints that he wont miss? seriously i need help on this one. how do i let him know that i will be a great girlfriend and i wont break his heart. how can i make him get over his problems with commitment?
THANK YOU SO MUCH =) (link)
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hey well i think that if he was honest with you the least you owe him is honesty. he told you his deepest secrets and you should tell him how you feel too. tell him that you are gonna care about him and be a good girlfriend and if one day things dont work out youll still be best frineds. hope i helped =)
SAM
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i have this friend from last year lets call her kendra and we were like BFFs but then this year we both switched to different schools so we dont hang out. I think she might be mad at me for some reason because i was a real jerk to her sometimes and i want to apologize but i cant call her house because her parents wont allow me to call her because i "plagiarized" (my friend gave me a song for school because i had forgotten about it and she said she wrote it but she didnt) and i tried to apologize for that so many times and i really want to talk to her again. what do i do? (link)
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i say that you should call her and pretned to be someone else so that you can talk to her. once the two of you are talking explain the whole situation. tell her how soryy you are and that you want to still be friends. if she doesnt understand then its her loss. i hope it works, btw you might need to fake ur voice if her parents know what you sound like.
SAM
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what is supposed to happen in the year 6969? like whats so facsinating sbout it? ppl keep tlking sbout it and i dont no what they are talking about.
thnx in advance! (link)
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maybe no one is talking about an actual year but rather just trying to make a joke about sex haha
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ok well i really like my best friend but he doesnt know and i cant tell him because well i either want things to work out in a bf gf way or just stay best friends. but i cant handle awkwardness around him. like lets say he doesnt like me and then i have to see him every day and yea it would be weird. a long time ago, months ago, i liked him and told him. he couldnt like me because he was going through a gay phase. but hes not gay now. he just wasnt sure at the time. so i know there is a chance he likes me. there are clear signs that he does. but those were also there when he was gay. he led me on and then hurt me. i have no idea why. and to top it all off, my friends are pissed at him because he has a tendency to piss people off. so they are like ditching him and i am like his only friend now. so naturally he treats me soo well. like he is super nice and stuff. what do you guys think? should i drop the whole liking him and just try to be friends?? thanx in advance
JEN (link)
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i think you should just stay friends because it seems like maybe its the best thing so far. maybe if he says he likes you then you should consider him like a bf but if he doesnt make his feelings clear than you should get over him because there are guys out there that will appreciate you for you.
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ok so basically iv wrote a question similar to this one but not really.. One of my close friends that i knew since 6th grade. Well i started to like him last year, and i have been liking him ever since. Heres the weird thing though. Every time i think bout him he pops up out of no where. Just like this.
1: When me and my friend were walking home i was thinking about him and then like 2 minutes later he drove right past us and yelled HEY
2:One morning i was thinking i wonder wut hes doin i got outside and there he was across the street from where i live playing basket ball
3:When i had a slide show on my computer of my family and friends all the pictures were fine, but when the picture of him came up my computer froze. Of all of the pictures to freeze on
4: When me and my friend were going to walk to the corner store i saw no one outside walking, then i was thinkin oh we are going to walk right past his house, then a couple of seconds later i heard foot steps from behind me and it was him walkin up behind me tryin to scare me.
5: I also always see him in the hall way and the thing is that i never did until i started to like him
This is really weird and it happens all of the time.. wut does this mean is something tellin me something??
help me out (link)
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maybe he likes you back or something and hes like following you haha, i dont know sometimes these unexplainable things just happen. maybe something is trying to tell you something....spend more time with him and maybe let em know how you feel. if he doesnt feel the same then dont worry there are other guys but i think he does, at least something think he does! spirits!! haha sorry i like spirits =3
anyways tell me how it goes
ttyl
SAM
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Ok, here's the deal. You see like two weeks ago I was on my period, and now I'm on it agian. I'm a little scared because it's heavier than most of my other ones. I told my mom, and she said that she's going to call the docter. I'm only 13 and my mom told me that it is probally because of my horomones, but I need some more advice than that. Can anyone tell me wants going on?
PLEASE and thank you. ^_^ (link)
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how long have you had ur period? if its been less than two years then its perfectly normal for your preiods to be two weeks apart or heavy. it takes a while for your body to become regular and once it does you will know how many days apart your periods are. dont worry im sure its nothing. i have weird periods sometimes and im 14. if you to learn more about preiods go to beinggirl.com they have a lot of useful information.
SAM
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okay flirting is a way to tell someone they like that person right?
or do friends just play around and do that for fun?
my friend and i flirt like this.
she disagrees with what i say, and we go on saying no and yes. then whe i ignor her she pokes me.
we call each other names, push each other around.
she teases with me, when i try to get something from her she takes it away. she even leans on me whenever.ect
somethings i do with my friends like name calling and pushing.
but me and her do it all the time like little kids.
2nd question: do friends lean on each other just because or if they like them? (link)
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ok well if this girl is leaning on you then its probably because she does like you. try doing more flirty things with her to let her know that you are intereseted in her. for example lean on her, play with her hads, put your arm around her shoulder. stuff like that. based on the way you act around eachother id say she like you. try hugging her from behind, girls like that, unless you think she would get freaked oout by it. and if she seems to become more interested talk to her or have a friend find out if she like you. good luck!
SAM
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Some people get to be pretty, do everything right, be popular, and make it seem like easy work while others stress constantly over everything and life...this is serious ive considered suicide A few times and I need help. how do thet do it? be so well perfect (link)
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i know it may seem like some people are perfect but really no one is. trust me i know what it feels like to hit rock bottom and see no other escape, but suicide is not the answer. each person is different. i used to want to be one of the popular girls with the perfect grades and perfect life. but then i realized that even their lives arent perfect. not at all. stress is a normal part of life. everyhitng seems to be going crazy in life rite now: school, parents, friends, relationships. EVERYTHING!! but you are not the only person who is going through this. those people who make it all seems so perfect. they have problems too. they just know how to keep their heads up high. folow that example. dont let things get to you. look for friends who love and support you. one person can make all the difference in your life, one good friend to listen to all your problems. hope i helped. anything you need. if you ever just want to talk, leave me a message in my inbox.
SAM
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so theres this guy and he's like my best friend. i realizied i really like him, we've talked and hung out alot lately, and he's single. the prob is when we look at each other in the hall im not sure if h feels the same. also i have never been kissed and ive decided i really want him to be my first. im 15/female. any suggestions on how to get him to like me and or how can i tell if he likes me for sure? thanks! (link)
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well ur situation is very similar to my own so maybe i can help. if you think that by the way he looks at you in the hallway that he is not interested then maybe he isnt. but if you think he might be then have someone talk to him for you. or maybe you can somehow bring it up and ask him if he likes anyone. as for the kiss, i myself have never been kissed. there is this guy i like, my best friend. he and i are really close. but im not sure if he likes me. i dream of having my first kiss with him. i know its a very awkward situation. hmmm hard to tell if he likes you...has he ever touched you? as in like hugging or putting his arm around you? even if he has or hasnt that doesnt really always give it away. so hey id really like to help you out. if you have A I M then maybe we can talk sometime. if not leave me a meesage in my inbox and tell me more about the situation. anyways hope to hear from you soon!
SAM 14/f
ok thats cool.my sn is spicyismyboy anytime you wanna talk just im me. ok talk to you soon.
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gothic 13 girl.my mom doesnt know the real me anymore because she just says all thats wrong with me then and how i dress and my friends my music my personality. she just says turn that crap off they just sing about hate when im listening to music even if their not singing about hate. my friends and clothes she still thinks im someone totally different she thinks im all preppy and wears pinks and shit and is friends with the preps. me and the preps got in a huge fight that changed alot of people a long time ago. and when my mom sees gothic kids she says they have no life. i am just about to slap her every time. i cant tell her because. she said if im ever a gothic whore shed kill me and id be grounded for life. which i am the gothic whore now i pretty much am grounded everyday and she couldnt kill me shell be charged with merder to her daughter. i put on a hoodie and jewelry then change my hair. every day for school and when i go places. im in the gothic group i now have true friends. i hate my life. how do i tell my mom in a better way i was thinkin of blowin up in her face well she does it to me i learned well she does it a usual basis. im the sneakiest of all people. im gothic so face it. get over it. help mee (link)
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write a letter, a long letter saying exactly how you feel as if you were gonna give it to your mother. then one day when the time is right give it to her. its a lot better than exploding in her face. my parents are the same way with me sometimes they cant accept who i am. so write her a letter. tell her how she ruins ur life. be truthful. most likely it will hurt her but she will end up understanding better. yelling at parents never helps it just makes things worse. tell me how it goes if you actually do it. hope it works.
SAM
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13/f
Well, I'm sort of in a sticky situation, and I don't know what to do. I fancy someone so much, he is such an amazing person. Let's call him C. I have known who C was for about 6 months now, and I always thought he was hot. But a few months ago it started to be more than that, and now I really fancy him. I've known him personally for a month now.
I met him through friends and everything he did suggested one thing: he fancied me. I posted a question before descibing everything he had done and asking whether it appeared that he fancied me. Everyone answered yes. Since then C has done other things, like send me flirty messages, make eye contact and say I'm hot. I was so happy, because for once in my life, I could think of someone I fancied and not have that feeling of amazing happiness and sadness at the same time because it was a case of loving something I couldn't have. For once, it seemed as if someone felt the same way about me and it was a great feeling.
I've been hanging out with him quite a lot and he is such a nice person. He's not like the others guys I've known, he really respects girls and other people's feelings.
But then, oh no, it has to happen again. I was at an all-night party the other day and he was there, I still felt like there was this amazing connection between us. But that was when I found out something terrible. C has a girlfriend. I had just assumed he was single because he hadn't ever stated otherwise, I had never seen him with anyone and no one had ever mentioned anyone. The reason for this, I found out at the party, was she lives miles away so he only gets to see her once a month and gets driven up in the car. Since then, on various internet surveys, he's said that he's in love with her. And I know for a fact that he's stayed faithful the whole time he's been dating her.
Yet I still get the feeling he fancies me, and I still fancy him like hell. But he doesn't love me, like he loves her.
At first, I thought, I'll try and split them up, someone having a girlfriend has never stopped me before. But then it hit me, I really care for C. I know how much he loves this girl and how happy he is with her, and I don't want him to be upset. And certainly not because of something I've done.
But I don't want to give up on him.
I'm thinking that maybe the best thing to do is concentrate on being friends with C, because I do want to do that. I think he's a great person and want him to be a part of my life, even if he is just a friend. But while I'm being friends with him I'll keep making that eye contact we make that makes me feel like we have a special connection. And I'll always dress really good and try to look great whenever I'm with him. And hope that he splits with his girlfriend.
Is that a good idea? Or should I just forget about him? Or make friends with him without the looking nice and eye contact stuff?
Please tell me what you think I should do in this situation.
Sorry it was long. Thanks in advance, xxx (link)
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i know exactly how you feel. i wish i could say the right words to make you feel better but this kind of thing happens all the time, and im sorry you have to go through it. it sux, when a guy has a girlfriend or some other reason why he cant go out with you. but it is good that you are thinking about a good solution. just concentrate on being friends. i would also say to try to get over him, but thats a hard thing to do especially with such a sweet guy. if you dont want to get over him or you cant then thats ok. but dont expect him to break up with his gf and get together with you. convince urself that he wont. i know it sux but its the only thing you can do. flirt with him if you want. just continue being friends as usual. dont let this get to you. you will be fine and one day a guy will love you to, even if it isnt this guy. i promise. =)
hope this helps
anything you need leave me a message in my inbox
SAM
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Okay im a 13/f and i got out of a relasion ship about 2 or three weeks ago. Then My ex's best friend asked me out and i said no cuz i have a friend who likes him so i thought i was doing the wright thing so i let him go. then this guy grey asks me out and i have known him since i was like mabey 3 or 4 and he is really nice and he gives me a hole lot of attention and i like it alot. But i think mabey if i say yes to grey that it might ruen our friend ship. So can you help me i need it despretly.
Luv,
Cant diside (link)
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i say that you give the guy a chance because if you are good friends and he is a sweet guy then i think he deserves it. as for the ruining of friendship i would suggest to take thigs slow with him so that no one gets hurt or anything. the last thing you want is to lose a friend. say yes, hes worth it =)
hope i helped
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for a few months i've been overly freakish about what i eat. whenever i eat, i feel so bad that i ate it and i feel so fat. i told this to my friend and she said that she thought i looked really skinny lately, but she didn't want to say anything. i can't eat food without looking at the calories and daily percentages and fat and stuff and it's driving me insane..i just ate dinner and i feel so fat, and it was only 300-350 calories, which isn't a lot for dinner. what can i do to stop this?? (link)
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ok well before this does turn into an obsession which it may already be becoming i would suggest going on websites that are designated to help teens deal with eating disorders. i mean you may not be starving yourself or puking but if you dont seek guidance soon, you may end up having a more serious problem. run a search on google for say "eating disorder" or maybe "counting calories." i hope this gets you somewhere. anything you need just ask me and ill do my best to help.
SAM
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Okay befor we get started i just wanna say i think i should get this advice from a guy cuz they could probly answer thsi better vuz im a girl so here it is Hey i am a 13/f and i have a biiiig problem or at least to me its big. Okay well i have a major crush on this guy gray at my school and he is soooo cute and i have known this guy since like i was three and we are good friends and from what i have been tolled he likes me to but all i wanna know is how am i soposed to tell him i like him thats what i need help on i dont know how to tell him that i like him can you give me advice on that???? and one more thing how do i kiss ????
(link)
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ok well my brother is gonna answer this since you want a male opinion. hes 15 by the way. ok here it goes:
i think you should just go up to him and tell him you like him. if a girl likes me i just want her to say she does. and sure you can flirt if you want too. he likes you. if thats wat everyone is saying then it should be true. and if he doesnt you can always hook up with me. haha jkjk but there are other guys so if he doesnt like you just forget about him.
[i hope my brother helped =)]
SAMS BROTHER
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mk. well there's this guy i guess you can say who's kinda shy. I went out with him [if you want to call it that] in 5th grade. Then again in 6th. But 7th i never talked to him and here we are 8th grade he's asked me out twice. I went out with him once. Then! he asked me out again. And i just said i'd like to be friends for a little longer. Well he's real sweet and stuff but i'm just afraid he's not gonna talk to me...and you don't always see him as the "boyfriend" type like hugging, kissing , holding hands n stuff. Formal's coming up and his friends keep telling me that he's gonna ask me and he's sweet but i really just wanna go with my best friend. lol BUT over this past weekend we talked like ALL night and i think i started to like him...and i really don't know what to do anymore...anyone have any ideas where i can figure out if i really like him or if it's just cause i don't wanna hurt him?
please and thank youu! (link)
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its hard to decide whether or not you actually like a guy. but if you think you mite like him then you probably do a little. take the time to talk more to him because if he already likes you then it wouldnt be a hard choice. he seems like a sweet guy and hes probably not gonna be that shy about a relationship. i say go for it and take it slow though. because the best would be that if he asks you to go and you think you mite like him just say yes. i bet you have an awesome time! heh your lucky you got a guy after you lol. for me its the other way around haha. well good luck and i hope you have tons of fun at formal =)
SAM
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Okay, so this boy.. he likes me. He used to go with one of my friends. Well, really we just got good friends.. but I didn't know they were going out untill like a week ago.. I really want to go out with him, yet again... I don't want to do that to a friend. But, we're not like best budz for life.. or anything, we're just like..friends. Soo..would I be wrong for going out with him... Should I just leave him alone,?..and go fetch some other fishes in the sea? (link)
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well i was in the same situation and what ended up happening was that my friend got over the guy and ended up going out with another guy. it might not work out this smoothly though. so first i suggest that you talk to her. explain that you like him and ask her if she'll mind you two dating. most likely she will not mind. if this is the case then go for it. if not then you should probably move on/ look for other guys.
lets just say i have a friend who is going out with her friends ex behind her back. she found out and now they hate eachother and trust me its not pretty. so just make sure it feels like ur doing the RIGHT thing and you'll never go wrong
SAM
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15/f. This isn't really new for me. But it has been bothering me for the longest time. I apologize if this is long. If a person were to look at me, from an "un-biased" point of view (towards me) they would say my life is pretty cool. I get good grades. My parents get me anything I want. My parents actually CARE. But...lately I've been feeling ...sad. For NO apparent reason it seems. One of the main reasons...perhaps, is a guy. He's just been playing with me...and backstabbing me...and then coming back to me and asking forgiveness. He's made me depressed, and made my emotions go BIZERK. Also, my parents put too much pressure on me. Over grades....friends.....etc. They basically control and expect TOO much from me. I can't deal with it anymore. At school...NOBODY wants to be friends with me. Just because I'm smart. NOBODY ever talks to me unless they need something. And I feel so used by the people I actually call (and am able to call) my "best friends." No guy ever liked/likes me. I hate it. I feel worthless. It's a young age. But I can't help it. I started cutting myself not too long ago...and now I'm just confused. It seems like I have a good life...but it's all too much for me to handle. :/ How can I overcome this suicidal and worthless feeling? (link)
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im sorry. i know how you feel. i am in the same situation. i am a good child with good grades and amazing parents. some would say i am very lucky. but then a guy came and stole my heart and then led me on. he showed me he cared and then told me he only wanted friendship. he made me cry every nite and day. he made me go through a very difficult phase of my life. parents do put a lot of pressure on me as well with skool and also with chores. friends can be backstabbing and cruel and some ppl arent worth being your friends. its very difficult at times and it all seems to pile up. i cut myself too. the only pain i can control i suppose. i wish so badly that this guy would like me, i mean really badly.
but we are young people. we should see every challenge as an opportunity to grow and become stronger. think of it this way, as long as you live you will have to endure hardships. what determines whether you will be sucessful or not is your attitude. you are worth something. we all are. these are the hardest years of our lives. but they can also be the most fun if we make them that way. in order for your life to change, first you must change. it is the only way you will ever become happy:
"Today I rededicate my life to world peace
To be strong that nothing upsets my peace of mind
To talk health, happiness and hope to every person I meet
To make friends feel that there is something good and beautiful in each of them
To look at the sunny side of everything to be optimistic about life
To think only the best and work towards doing and expecting the best
To be just as happy about the success of others as I am about my own success
To forget any mistakes of the past, and press forward to great achievements in the future
To give so much time to improving myself, that I have no time to criticize others
To be too strong for fear, too kind for anger, too happy for worry
To lift my heart with faith each day, so that i may shine forth in my life
these are very powerful and inspirational words. i hope you can get through this. i myslef find life to be difficult at times. never lose hope though. it will all get better soon enough. be all that you can and dont worry about wat everyone else does. once you become happy, everything and everyone around you will take notice and your life will head in a possitive direction. if you need anything, anything at all leave me a message in my inbox and ill get back to you. good luck!
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ok.
so there is this guy that i met at my aunt's school. his name is Ross Kenseth. YES Matt Kenseth's son. Well any way. I really like him and one of my friends told him that i liked him. obviousley he doesn't like me or even want to get to know me bacuse he deleted me from his friends on myspace and blocked me. I WAS CRUSHED. Another thing. I have this "friend" named Stephanie. She told me that I only liked him because his dad is famous. It is not going throught her head that that is not why I like him.
(link)
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well im sure that liking a celebrity child can be weird. but it is the same as liking a regular guy becauase he IS a regular guy. and if your friend doesnt believe that you liked him and not his celebrity appearance then dont bother explaining it to her. i know the crushed feeling. im sorry. but there are a bunch of other guys that would love you because im sure you are a wonderful girl. anything you need tell me and i can try to help. =)
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ok, so i have this "friend" (i dont really like her) in my class
and we are both in band, and every time i look up, shes just sitting there staring at me, its really weird, and everytime i pass her in the hallway, she expects me to say hi, and gets mad at me if i dont
how can i tell her just to leave me alone without hurting her feelings?? (link)
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set a boundary by letting her know that you just want to be friends. some girls are just so obvious that its kind of annoying to some. but be nice about it. it seems like she might be the type to burst into tears or something. and if you really dont like her then even when she does get mad dont say hi to her. tell her that she is being to clingy or watever other word you want to use. give her no sign of "liking" her. she is gonna get hurt either way so try not to be too harsh. but any way you say it a girl will always be a little hurt. she'll get over it so dont feel guilty.
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Ahh I love the idea of love.
And anything romantic. :]
So, I was wondering, what are some good really good, possibly alt. rock, folk, or alt. pop -
I really like "Blue Eyes" by the Cary brothers
and, I like Coldplay, Iron & Wine, Counting Crows, Ben Harper, Kings of Convenience, Blue October, Simon & Garfunkle, anything of that nature. :)
Or any other sweet, romantic lyrics about who you love, whether it's happy or sad.
and while I'm at it....anyone know some good waltz songs? I'm thinking "Lover, you should've come over" by Jamie Cullum. sound good?
They're having a dance at my school on Friday and I'd love to request some good slow songs with sweet lyrics and pretty melodies. Thanks much :)
(no R&B please! thanks again) (link)
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"its not over" by daughtry is great.
"like a star" corinne bailey rae
"kiss from a rose" seal
hope this helps if i think of more ill give you some more titles.
have a fun dance
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