about

Hey! My names Sam, I started my advice column awhile ago, but when my computer messed up I forgot all about it. Well now I'm back and still going to give everyone the best advice I can give. The advice that I give is the advice I would use on myself. Giving advice is one of my favorite things to do. If anyone wants to ask me something just drop a message in my mail and Iâ??ll gladly answer it the best way that I can. =)

advice

I have a friend and he is thinking of suicide..I try talk him out of it,but he won't listen. He has problems in school,family life,relationship problems. I don't want him leaving me. We have been best friends so long!
HELP!

the best thing to do is not only tell him that you care about him but show him that a lot of people care for him. Don't just tell him not to do suicide. Show him that you care. Do things together. What i mean by that is like hang out with him. For example go to the mall, go bowling, or go to the movies. Try to take his mind off of suicidal thoughts. If this doesn't work you should tell a family memeber or someone you trust. They will help you.
~~I hope this works for the best..remember to stay positive ...b/c life's too short...~~

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ok well i might ask out a 6th grader and im in 7th grade and im probably gonna see her maybe 2 times a weekis this a problem?

now age doesn't matter. And if you really like her you will try hard to see her more than 2 times a week. Make dates, to show her you care. If she likes you a lot she won't care that she only sees you 2 times a week and those 2 times a week would be special.
-I hope this is what you mean!
~Hope it works out for the best~

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hey i just got my upper ear (cartilege ?) periced a few days ago. the question i had is its still hurting and its very swollen is this normail?? if so how long will it last. i have the bactin spray and its not infected or anything its just healing i guess. is there anything i can do to make the swelling go down and to ease the pain??? thanks

ok well when i got mine done it didn't swell.... what i was told was to take the earing out if swelling does happen and if you don't want to than you should go back to the place where you got it done and ask them.
~I hope this answers your question~
ps. hmmm mine didn't hurt at all after about 2 days well only when i slept on it but thats all i really do think you should go back to where you got it pierced.

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Does anyone know any good books about like girls who are about 13 or up?

I'm not sure what you mean...but if you mean like fictional a really good book..well actually its a series of books and it's called "Gossip Girl". It's about these "rich" girls but it's an entertaining book or books....i couldn't put it down.
~I hope this helps ...sorry if it's not what you mean~....

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Who thinks that this site should be for helping people, not senslessly being jerks? Say I.

i!!!!

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Age: 13

Gender: Female

There is this guy and i like him a lot but he only likes me as a friend. He knows that I like him and he's fine with it and we still talk. What should I do ask him out or just wait and see what comes next??

What i think you should do is wait. Because if you ask him out and he says no.. You guys might not be as good of friends as you once were.
~hope it works out for the best~

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13/f he is 14/m
Theres this guy that i've been talking to online for about a year. We eventually exchanged cell phone numbers and have talked on the phone. He is really nice and I find myself feeling in love with him. I know people probably think internet love is a bust but that's how I feel when I talk to him. He isn't one of the guys that wants to have cyber sex either, just to talk. He's always there when I need him and he's very sweet and he is always looking out for my best interests as well. I want to meet him but I don't know if I should. He lives about an hour away from me and he was planning on taking a train to visit me. I know there are some freaks out there, but I don't think he comes off as one of them and I also know to be careful and if I were to meet him I would bring a friend, of course. I don't know what to do, the train station is public but the town is small so not a whole bunch of people would be there. Please give me advice.

Doing this isn't the smartest thing to do. It seems to me like you already know this. If you were to meet him MAKE SURE you bring a friend. And don't let him/her leave your side. Make sure this friend is a trusted friend. Oh and it's best if he tells you what hes wearing or something that will make him stick out. Don't tell him what you are wearing so if he isn't the right guy he won't know it's you and you can leave without trouble.
-please be safe
~I hope it works out for the best~

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The song that goes "dont ya wish your girlfriend was hot like me dont ya wish your girlfriend was a freak like me?"....anyone know who sings it or the name of it?

The Pussycat dolls --- Don't cha

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O.K. My boyfriend cheated on me like... 3 weeks ago. I forgave him, as long as he never did it again. It was pretty hard trusting him again after that, but I did. After I had THOUGHT I had gained nothing but love and respect for him again... he CHEATED ON ME AGAIN with my sister! I know it's pretty weird but I don't trust EITHER one of them. How can get over the fact that my OWN sister could do that to me? I miss my boyfriend but I have been hurt enough and don't NEED him in my life. I love my sister but what she did was wrong and I have still not forgiven her.
I can't believe this could ACTUALLY happen to me! I'm so depressed all the time and I have lost hope in ever finding the right guy again! I really thought he was the one for me. He was so right for me, so perfect and then, BOOM! He's sleeping with my sister! I don't know what to do! I'm so confused. I'm so depressed that I'm throwing up and crying non-stop. It's really sad for me. My sister keeps telling me she's sorry but I still have not forgiven her. I haven't even talked to her! Please help! This is really devastating for me and I need someone to tell me what to do!

I rate high!
Katie Marie Sanchez- age 17

ok first things first...find out why in the world he would cheat on you. If he truly loved you he wouldn't cheat on you. Second of all not talking to your sister will help for a little while but after a while your gonna need her in your life. Now usually most guys really do feel like "he was the one" but you have to remember its just a guy and guys have feeling just like us. You might have already known this but still. Remember hes just a guy and really there is tons and tons more guys out there. You may not see it now but soon you will find a better guy. He may come crawling back to you and if you want a cheater in your life than take him back...!!
-this may not help but i tried my best.
~I hope it works out for the best~
- you WILL find someone perfect for you...

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i was wondering if anyone knew how to cut pants into skirts. because i have like 3 pairs of pants that fit in the waist but dont fit in the legs. so if anyone could help i rate high!

The first thing you do is cut the legs off at the right length you want the skirt... than u cut out the middle and try them on you might have the hem the bottom so they don't fall apart.
-I hope this makes sence

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i rate really high i used to go out with this guy but he broke up with me cause i am going to another skool. i new him since i was 1 and i love him so much. he was the only bf that i actually felt comfortable with. i cant ask my mom if i can go to his house. i am only 13 and want to no how to get him back plz help!!

ok, what i don't understand is why he broke up with you just because you are going to a different school. What i think you should do is call him and tell him how you feel. Ask him how he really feels about you. And than ask him for another reason why he broke up with you. There has to be another reason why...?!?!
-i hope this helps
~i hope you get him back....!!!~
-good luck

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okay this miht be a bit wierd but like wen ever i get my period i feel all wierd like its leaking thru my pants or something at skool and i really worry that it might be leaking! idk what to do? i mean if some one saw that there were blood stains on the back of my pants and especially if it was a guy i liked wat would i do? thats like sooo embarassing!
help!

yeah i feel like that all the time. Most of the time its just feels like it is but if you really think it is go check in the bathroom. If you don't have time than wear longer shirts or..wear a jacket or sweater around your waste...
~i hope this helps you in anyway!!~
ps if a guy that you liked saw that... you can't really do anything i mean he saw what he saw.. and you can't change that... but he will get over it soon...!

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My vet keeps sending me postcards wanting me to bring in my cat to get her yearly exam and shots. Is this really necessary? When I was a kid, we never brought our cats to the vet. We live in an apartment, so my cat never goes outside or is exposed to other animals. So I don't see a purpose for these vaccines. She was just at the vet 2 months ago for an eye infection, so they know she is in good health. Is it really that necessary that I bring her?

No this isn't needed. They want to make sure that if your pet does go outside or whatever that you do bring them in. Sometimes they just want your money. I think maybe you should call the vet and tell them what you said here. "We live in an apartment, so my cat never goes outside or is exposed to other animals" Then they might stop sending you these postcards. I sue to get these all the time and thats what i said and did and now i don't get them anymore.

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I have these friends of mine. They were my best friends. Even though we go to different schools, I still spend lots of time with them. I really loved them, no matter what happened between us. Some people said that I was so stupid that I trusted them so bad that I have never thought bad things about them.
Few days ago, one of my friends came to me and told me that all of my friends were talking bad things about me. I did not trust him, of course, cause I believed that my friends would not do such a thing to me.
Then, when I checked my e-mail, I found a message for me. It was all bad things about me. It was from my friends. I was so shock that I spend my time crying with my boyfriend. My boyfriend, which was my closest best friend too, told me that even though my friends hated me, he would stay with me. But actually, his words did not calm me down. I still worried about my friends. I did not hate them, and I would never do, but I could not forget what they said about me. Now, I'm avoided and hated by my friends. And they avoid my boyfriend in their school too!! I really don't know what to do... Please help me!!!

-brokenheart girl-

Real friends wouldn't say bad things behinde your back. Friends would either,
1) not say anything bad about you or...
2) say these "mean" things to your face.
i don't think you should start saying anything bad about them. I think you should call them up and ask them why they would say these things and tell them that friends shouldn't do that to eachother.
~I hope it works out for the best!~

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I hate myself. Does anyone have any ideas to stop a persons perceptions of things, or path of thinking change? I dont beleive in any kind of religion and i beleive that there is no reason to anything and that life and existance in general is just so pointless. If people live to be happy and content, yet are mainly overcome by other stronger emotions such as pain and anger what is the point of living? there is no afterlife its just nothing. why be afraid of something you wont be aware of. why bother searching for peace of mind which you already know you will never get. each and everyone of us are unique so no one is. no one will remember me when i die because i have had no impact upon anyone. i have achieved nothing and have had nothing able to be achieved because of how many billions of people in the world that are better then me. nothing has meaning me running around in an endless circle compared to going to school and learning are of about the same value. .. should i get help?

Life is pointless...unless YOU try to change that. Everyone goes through this time in their life where they say this...and yes i have already gone through this. I don't think you need help and i don't think i can change your mind on anything that you are saying. Everyone is different and that does make us unique. When people go through pain and suffering it helps them become who they want to be. You do have an impact on everyone. What you are saying right now, someone might read and start to feel the same way. If you are depressed all the time family and friends might think they're doing something wrong and might become depressed too. You shouldn't be afraid of death. You do know that you are gonna die one day so if it happens tomorrow...well atleast maybe you changed someones life. This may not help..but ... this is my advise and it's the best i can do to help you...so
~I hope it works out for the best~
ps. for right now our lives do go in circles because we are in school and our brains still want to learn. Once we get older things will change we will have kids and work and just life. Right now i think you should be happy, don't be depressed about life. You should enjoy your life.

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my boyfriend of 7 months got drunk the other night and planned on hiding it from me. i found out from someone else who was there. my boyfriend always promised & swore that he would never drink and how stupid he was. he ended up getting drunk with his friend and when i found out, i gave my boyfriend soooo many chances to confess and tell me the truth and he didnt. later he finally admitted it and i was so outraged that i broke up with him and told him i never want to see him again, and i hung up. he hasnt tried to call me or fix things up. my friends called him and said he was crying and too afraid to talk to me. i dont want to call him first...but should i forgive him? he broke my trust.

what i think you should do is give him time to think about what he has done. You might feel bad for him but really he should feel bad for you. He shouldn't of kept that from you. I think you should wait till he calls you. Than tell him that you need time to think and once you have done that i think by then u can tell him if you want to date him still. I can't tell you if you should forgive him. If i was in you situation i would have to have a lot of time to think.
~I hope this turns out for the best~

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I recently recieved a goldfish from a friend. It's orange mostly, with clear fints, some black patches, and a blue stripe next to the fin. I THINK it's girl but i'm not sure lol. What should i name it? And is there anything imparticular i should know to help me keep a goldfish content and healthy?

Thanks,
Panda

haha i love goldfish this might sound random but it sounds like a Seymore...even if it is a girl its still a cool name...oh and i had to get this stuff i don't remember what its called but it helps it live longer...and you put like 5 drops in and it really did make my fish live a lot longer.... oh and it helps calm the fish down..i really can't remember what it was called... i bet if you go to a local pet shop and ask them they will know where to find it...
~hope this works for the best~
ps.. awesome fish never seen a goldfish with a blue stripe next to its fin

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well this might be long but i need some help..this girl and me hated each other because of a boy,(wont get into it itd be to long haha) but found out he was playing both of us and we became really good friends because we started talking to each other and found out we were a lot alike. over the summer id find myself being ditched a lot. like the last day of school, we were going to hang out but i found out she was hanging out with one of her best friends that hates me for no reason and i have no problem with her, but i forgave her.. and then over and over we would make plans and then she would ditch me again for this girl! it really pissed me off and i confronted her about it and she would make up these excuses that ohh she just came over because they live by each other.
she got a new boyfriend and said she didnt like the guy any more.. and the guy and i ended up hanging out at the same place and ended up doing stuff, a couple days after i found out she still liked him and was only going out with the guy to make him jealous.. so i felt bad and all but i told her and she was glad i told her and didnt act all that mad because i mean she was the one who said she didnt like him any more.. but we were going to hang out the next day and she didnt pick up her phone, and was super pissed but i understood why she would have been mad.. ANYWAYS i wrote her a sorry note and everything we were good and then she does it AGAIN she was just like oh i have a friend over sorry even though we planned the time and everyhting that i would have came over. it was bitch so i didnt talk to her after a while she apologized and said she just wanted to get back at me but she shouldnt have said she was fine when she really wasnt. she promised shed make it up to me somehow and she did because we hung out a lot after that. and everything was fine. her and her friend got in a big fight.. so wed hang out a lot more becuase her other friend wasnt there. then, i would call her because we were going to hang out but she ended up having to take care of her brothers so i was stuck again for the night... and that day i was the only one to call her and she wouldnt call me back and tell me what was going on... so for about a week i didnt talk to her, but then i called her and left a message wanting to talk to her and see wat her deal is.. and she didnt return my call at all... so i called her a couple days later and she picked up and i was straight up asking why she didnt return my calls and wouldnt call me and she was like i didnt get the message or any of your calls and i didnt call you because i thought you were mad at me.. so we talked and she had to go and told me to call her that night so i did and she said her mom was up and shed call me back but she never did and didnt today either! its like after all that youd think she would at least call..i dont know if i should believe her or not and still be her friend, when were together we have so much fun and stuff but its just im always getting ditched and not treated right.. its like shes taking advantage of me. sorry again it was so long but thanks to all if you read it :-(

p.s her and her friend are now cool again, so im thinking i was just used sortof cuz her other friend wasnt there


15/f

ok ....you are right i really do think she was using u because she had nothing better to do....a true friend wouldn't ditch you so much... i had this problem and i had to learn the hard way ...which was we got into a fight and she never talked to me again... i think you guys should still be friends but instead of just asking her to go places ask more friends to go so that way if she doesn't make it you will have ppl to hang out with... and maybe if she does make it she will see how much fun it would be and she might show up more.... i hope my advise works...

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ok .. my dad has changed an hes really ill.. an hes sp mean now an i hate to be around him im only 14 .. an like i really dont want to go with him when its time .. an plus hes a lawyer an i cant talk to him about anything hes not a dad to me anymore ... an my parents our divorced an i dont know what to do im just so upset he hits me an i dont know ... i just dont want to go with him cant i make a choice if i can how ?? please help me???

I think if he hits you it's a good sign that maybe you should move in with your mom if it's possible. I think the best way to do this is tell your mom and maybe she can take you and your father to court with it.
I really do hope that this works out for the best!!

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My friend Jennifer and I have been good friends since 7th grade but our freshmen year we became really far apart. I got a boyfriend and she felt rejected. Well I tried to reconnect with her hear the last few months and now she has a boyfriend. I invite her places with me and she always comes up with rediculious excuses to not go. I invited her to a concert with me and she didn't go because her boyfriend came to her house. I never blew her off like this. We have our old conservations on the phone and talk at lest 2 hours every other day. I just dont know what to say or do. I want to go to the old ways.

People grow up and people start to find other friends and more people to hang out with. If you really want to hang out with her more maybe you should talk to her about what she is doing. Maybe tell her that a true friend wouldn't blow you off for a boyfriend. Tell her boyfriends don't last forever but true friendships last forever. Just remember you don't always have to talk to her to be her friend.
If she keeps blowing you off I really do think she doesn't want to be your friend anymore and instead of wasting your time inviting her everywhere, ask other friends if they want to go and soon she will find that she is missing out and want to go more places with you.
I hope this works out for the best!!

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