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January 5, 2009Answers:
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advice
Okay so this guy doesn't have the same personality as most guys i've been with or liked..so i'm not really sure how to like get his attention. I don't really know him that well he's hung out with me and my friends like once but like i'm..interested in him? I don't have a crush on him or anything cause i really don't know him that well..i hope this makes sense lol. But how do i get his attention??
Or really how do you get any guys attention lol especially if you like see them in the hallway
The first step is to watch him, and see what kinds of things he is interested in. See how he interacts with other people. Are they loud and funny, quiet and serious? Pay attention to things. Step number two-smile. Not like, twelve times in one day, but like two times at moments when you are passing eachother, whatever. If he comes up to you-great, but if he doesn't, don't approach him that day. Step three-you can approach him and talk to him, but you can just as easily talk to one of his friends, and ask them a question about him.
f 17
my boyfriend and i went to a local concert and had a lot of fun, it was a really wonderful night.
he got a ride home with his friend and i drove myself home.
a few minutes after i got home he called me to tell me that his friend thought it would be funny to punch the gas while he was getting out of the car, so basically he fell and got his leg run over by one of the wheels and he says he has a purple gash on his leg now.
naturally i started freaking out, i mean he called me to tell me this and it sounds really serious. he said he could walk on it fine so i know it isn't broken. i started looking up how to treat leg wounds and asking him questions about it with legitimate genuine concern, and he keeps being like "relax chill it's ok it's not a big deal i'm fine it's gonna fine"
after a good 15 minutes of this back and fourth kind of talk i got really frustrated and upset so i was like "ugh. i have to go. bye." and he was like "oh, ok, bye"
but i'm still genuinely perturbed, this whole him not worrying thing happens all too frequently, but only with his own well-being. he worries about me a lot, but he never puts enough logical consideration into himself.
...am i just being a typical woman at this point? am i nagging? am i overreacting?
this specific incident aside, how can i influence him to take better care of himself, or at least take my worrying somewhat seriously? he doesn't eat much and when he does it isn't healthy, he's 17 and still hasn't gotten his driving permit, and he's been wearing just a thin sweatshirt jacket when it's genuinely freezing outside.
....am i just acting like his mom? how can i get him to take my concerns seriously and actually do something about them?
I hate to say it, but you are acting a little like his mother. Maybe you are treating him the way you think you would like someone to treat you, but after a while you would get sick of it, too. It is almost as if you are saying to him, "Hey, stupid...put a coat on...eat this....why don't you have a driving permit...why are you so irresponsable..." You think you are showing love, but it might be coming across differently to him. Spend one whole day only commenting on the things you think he's doing right. It will be good for the both of you.
Hi today i had a brown discharge i havent had sex and im 13yrs old is there something wrong with me??
Thanks in Advance
Most likely, you are getting your period, or ovulating, etc. Green discharge is what you want to be scared of, because green means infection. You know how your bugars can be all different colors-so can discharge. If you are not feeling stomache pains, and your discharge doesn't have a very different, or foul smell, you usually have nothing to worry about.
Our mutual "friends" apparently told her bad things about me, like, how I am "controlling" and yell at any other girl he talks to and other things apparently. I am not okay with this. Is there a way I can approach her about this? Through a letter? In person?
I will see her Wednesday (today is Monday) at a wrestling match. Her son (my boyfriend) is one of the star wrestlers and I am the manager. What can I do? Please help me. We have been dating on and off for the last 4 years. 16/f
The best way that you can get in with your boyfriend's mother is to remember your place, she is his mother, therefore number one. Let her know that you love her son, but you respect her opinion, and ask her openly if she is noticing something that you don't see about yourself. If you have been with her son for four years, she must have known you for a long time, and she probably cares about you more than you realize. If you approach her as someone who could teach you a few things about life, she will probably jump on the opportunity. If you avoid her, she will draw her own conclusions. Also, if there is some truth to it, and you are a bit controlling, admit your faults, and tell her you will work on it.
18/F Anyways here's my problem. I've been dating my boyfriend for three months and things are really great. It's just that lately I've had these feelings I've never had for anyone before, and mind you I've dated a few guys. I almost have this fear that he's going to go back to college and find someone else way prettier and smarter. I'm still in high school, and he's 22. I sort of have a problem of letting people get close to me, but for some reason I let myself become vulnerable around him. I've just started putting my guard down for people. I'm constantly thinking about him, and when I think about him my heart starts pounding faster and faster. I just would like to find out if he's feeling the same way without just coming out and asking him flat out. Anyways, please help me think of how to get over feelings of heartbreak because I'm also afraid if I keep feeling that way he'll end up dumping me. I have a very low self esteem on top of it all. Any help is appreciated.
You have to tell yourself that he is thinking about you while the two of you are apart, even if you're not sure. He is going to go away, regardless, and the only thing that you can control is how you act about it. Let's say that he goes away and is faithful to you. How long will that last if you question and haunt him? Plus, you'll have wasted all of that time worrying for nothing. If he goes away and cheats on you, harping at him isn't going to change the situation. If the two of you are having good, fun conversations, he will be far more likely to put a stop to any cheating. Remember, all of those college girls are going to be calling attention to your immaturity, so you don't want to prove them right by acting jealous and emotional. If you go about your own life missing him, yeah, but also having fun and being positive, he will want to hear your voice on the other end of the line. Long distance relationships are always difficult, and you should be able to talk about how you feel without dwelling.
So it was recently Christmas, and I had no idea what to get my boyfriend. I knew anything I got him would not be special enough, and I looked and looked and time just kind of slipped by and I didn't end up getting him anything. He got me something really nice. He was really hurt that I didn't get him anything. I regret it now, but I can't change that, so please don't bug me about it.
Question: What can I surprise him with that would make him really happy? (If any of you suggest sex I will rate you badly)
The trick is to pick up on something that he wouldn't expect you to notice. Believe it, or not, most guys really do appreciate socks and underwear, or something that he would have had to buy for himself. Don't worry about doing the "romantic" thing. Spend the next day on a mission, and the answer will come to you out of the blue.
i started birth control the end of november i took it up until december then i ran out n couldnt get anymore cuz of the holiday. i started taking it again 9 days ago so i was off the pill for about a week or so.. i've been on it for about 9 since the week gap. i had unprotected sex with my boyfriend today.. what are the risks of me being pregnant its been heavy on my mind.
Consider yourself completely unprotectd by the birth control pill for the next straight month. Sometimes, the risk of becoming pregnant can be higher in your situation. There are remedies, like the morning after pill. many clinics offer this at a very reasonable price, if not free, but it is something you hae to take care of right away.
i had cybersex with a girl recently but i found no pleasure in it. It didn't arouse me and i didn't enjoy. word is out and now people think i'm bisexual. could this be true? im not attracted to girls in that way but im just asking could i be lying to myself?
If you were not turned on by sexual interaction with another woman, you are probably not bi-sexual. Don't label normal curiosity, or yourself. If you are truly interested in exploring relationships with other woman maybe cyber isn't the way to go. Do you get turned on during cybersex with a male? Is cyber sex even sex? It sounds like some other people might have caught wind of this whole thing and started making comments that made you wonder. Don't start thinking your a bisexual because of what other people are saying about you. And from now on keep your sex life private. you don't want people to talk about your personal business, and you don't need to broadcast.
What's wrong with me?
I've been trying to establish a long lasting relationship for the last 3 years with 3 different women and each one has fallen apart..........and I can't see why? I need help to figure out what I’m doing wrong and need suggestions. I’ve tried to be myself and that’s just not good enough. I mean I have the right ingredients: I'm male, in my 30's, have a secure job in medicine, live in NYC, am well paid, think I'm a nice guy, do things for others without any expectations........and despite all this, things never work out.
I put my all into these relationships……I don’t hold back. I’m willing to do anything for these girls to make them happy………I’ll sacrifice sleep, time, energy, effort, money…. Things always start out well but then things turn and the relationship sours. I always feel I’m not doing enough and when I pull back , they pull completely away…….I mean what is it………….Am I too ugly? Too short? Too needy?
I’ve put in so much effort. Every time things end, I become more bitter and upset and depressed. It takes a hell of a lot out of you………and each time I pick myself back up, I get knocked down. Is gets difficult to remain optimistic.
I don’t need reassurances that things will get better….I need advice as to how to improve them.
It seems like you might be the type of guy who attracts takers. The right woman for you is going to put a little effort into keeping you happy, too. Don't get your eye on the most beautiful chick with the hottest body because no guy is going to be able to keep her happy. why don't you give a little on the looks department (not much) and hook up with a woman who is still hittable, but more attainable. Let her put a little work in, too.
Im a sophomore and this guy is a senior and for a week or two he would be eyeing me in the hallway and my friend is friends with his friend and so my friend told her friend to tell the guy that I thought he was hott, and he said he didnt know who I was so. So since then, nothing has happened so I am pretty much just letting it pass by. I thought maybe he would make a move or something since I thought maybe he thought i was hott or something since he kept looking at me. Now that break is over its kinda a new start so im not going to go out of my way to make this guy notice me again. Basically if i put myself out there and they dont respond then i move on, i dont bother wasting my time. But what do you think? Should I give up or keep trying? Anything would be great, thanks!
What do you mean "keep trying"? you haven't tried yet. If you really like this guy you should let him know what's up, or at least flirt with him a little and see where it goes.
I am 4 mo. pregnant and the babies daddy left me penniless, homeless, and with out a car. I am about to be homeless in a few days and the sad part is I'm not a bad person. I don't do drugs and I don't drink and violence of any kind is just not in my nature. I love this child and its not even born yet. I live in the country and there are no homeless shelters anywhere near. I have no friends and family and will do anything to keep and raise my baby. Please help me what should I do. This child deserves its mother.
Terra
You have to let go of the "near" Maybe the best thing for you is to get out of that area where you don't have any friends or family to help you. Go to your welfare office, or another agancy immediately and explain the situation. You may have to move away for a little while, but I have a feeling a lot of good things will come with your independence.
16/f
Two weeks ago I invited 7 camp friends for a dinner party which I had on Friday. One of these people is a guy I like who worked in the same group as me and my best friend this past summer at camp (he sort of knew I like him, [long story] and I'm not sure if he still thinks I like him but he might, & I'm pretty sure he didn't like me back but everything worked out cause we talked about it and we'e still friends even though it was sort of awkward for a couple days). I sent an email invitation to all the people I was inviting in the same message on Facebook so I wouldn't have to send a bunch of different emails. People were sending messages back & forth within the message so I know he saw this invitation. Everybody answered within about 4-5 days after I sent it except for him. I sent him a separate message a week after I invited everybody asking if he was coming, and he never answered. Two days before the party, I asked my best friend to ask him, and he never answered her, and he was online all day so I'm sure he saw it. Some of my other friends and my cousin advised me not to say anything else to him, saying if he didn't end up coming it was his loss, or I'd just be pissing him off if I kept bothering him. He didn't show up last night. I briefly checked AIM during the night several times when nothing much was going & saw that he was on AIM, not away or idle, each time I checked. When I told some of my camp friends about it they were surprised saying that that's not like him, and I do agree, because he is a really, really nice person, we're still friends, and we always had fun working together during camp (we haven't talked much since camp ended, but we're still friends). I was also confused because I invited him to my birthday party a month ago that he legitimately wasn't able to come to, but said something to me about it. I'm very confused and disappointed about why he ignored my invitation, didn't show up, and sat on the computer all day instead. I know he doesn't hate me and we're friends, and I'm sure he would've wanted to see other camp people too. What might be a possible reason someone would do that? Should I confront him?
Maybe he just didn't want to be the only guy at the party. There could have been a lot of reasons that he didn't want to go. It sounds like he is really a nice guy who doesn't want to hurt you, and he isn't sure the two of you are capable of being just friends. i wouldn't "confront" him, but there wouldn't be anything wrong with you going up and saying something like, "I wish you would have been able to come, but I understand not wanting to be the only guy in a bunch of girls"
Sorry-I can't figure out how to put this on a separate box. I would come right out and ask him what's up. It seems odd that he wouldn't have replied, even after you sent the second email directly and he avoided answering your friend. Just approach him in a friend-like manner and ask him if everything's OK with the two of you. His weird behavior could be for any number of reasons,and you'll never know if you don't ask.
my boyfriend wants to finger me but i have a few questions....1. does it hurt? or what does it feel like? (i dont use tampons and dont really stick anything up there but have have my clitoris rubbed) 2. how do you properly clean the vagina so that it doesn't smell? 3. what do you do while hes fingering you? and 4. do guys like it completely shaved or with a little hair?
i know its alot of questions so id appreciate answers to any of them. thank youu
Before I answer any of these questions-Please-are you sure you want your boyfriend to finger you? You say he wants to do it to you, but that is not what matters. What do you want?
Next-This is going to sound weird, but why don't you try it on yourself? You will be able to tell what it feels like. I say, until you are able to do it to yourself you have no business letting anyone else. As far as the cleaning-don't bother to try any perfumes, douche, etc. None of them work, and they can actually make things worse. The best way to clean your vagina is soap and water, but an experienced woman will masturbate because it cleanses everything out. You might not be ready for that kind of wisdom, yet, but I think you should spend a little time getting to know your own body before you let anyone else go exploring. Don't worry about shaving, yet. Why don't you just trim it nice and neat with scissors?
ok so i was texing this kid and all of a sudden he goes ^o^. and i was like wtf if that? and he said "its you" i dont get it? is it like a face?what emotion is that supposed to show?.....retarded?
thanks, haha
I'm not sure, but picture the ^as a leg, now the other ^ as a leg.
15/f
Well i heard this guy thinks i am pretty and he wants to get to know me because one of my friends knows him and is very good friends with him. We will call her (Mayla). Anyways mayla told me all this a week ago because we were off school for winter break. At first, i didn't know who he was, but now i do because i saw him when we came back to school. We came back to school today and i realized that we are in 2 classes together. I want to make a good impression on him because i think he is sorta cute. He isn't the best, and is different from all the guys that i have dated before and usually not my type, but i think he is somewhat cute. Well today to school i wore a really cute black shirt and i painted my nails black to match (i swear i am not gothic, i like bright colors also). So, tomorrow i wanted to wear another cute black shirt that i have and my nails would still be black, but i am afraid he will think i am emo or whatever because a lot of guys i know hate black nail polish. Anyways, im worried about that, so i might just wear this turquoise colored shirt tomorrow. I am still confused on the guy though. I didn't even like him before i knew he liked me (well i really didn't know who he was anyways, but still) and he won't talk to me. All today, he didn't say a word to me. I want him to make the first approach because if he supposedly likes me, that's what he is supposed to do. I won't do it. But if he dosen't i will be sad, because i really am starting to like him kinda. I want to actually talk and get to know him first and text him or something. Anyways, what should i do??
You are over analyzing about the black nail polish two days in a row, but other than that, the whole thing is so romantic. I wonder if he is worrying as much about what he is wearing around you. Keep in mind that he liked you before, so don't go trying to be a different person. You mention that he is different from the other boys you have liked before, so he might not be the foward type you are used to. Give it another day or two, and if he doesn't say anything, you say something to him. Don't be nervous because you have already won the battle-he likes you as you are. You don't have to try to impress him.
ok so,...i shave all my pubic hair off. like with a razor, i get it ALL. and the day i shave it, and the day after, its pretty smoothe. but then it gets all prickly but i have to wait at least 4 days before i shave it again, or else it cuts the skin because the hair is waaayy too short.
is there an easier way to do this? am i making too big of a deal out of it?
It doesn't matter how short the hair is when you shave it, as long as you don't go against the grain. Wait until the end of your shower, so your skin is moist and smooth. Deoderant (only on the outside, obviously) helps with razor bumps.
you can shave every other day if you want to.
Typically I don't ask for advice but I just don't know what to do. My fiance doesn't want to have sex with me because he's too afraid of hurting our baby. It's very frustrating and I just don't know what I can do to change his mind.
Any advice will be helpful at this point. Thankyou in advance.
katexoanne
The bigger the deal you make about it, the worse it will become. He has a valid reason for not being worried about having sex, so don't blow it out of proportion or take it personally. If you were to tell him you didn't want to have sex because of the baby, you wouldn't want him to pressure you. If you were to have him accompany you to a doctor's visit the doctor will be able to reassure him. Also, keep in mind, the less interested you are the more interested he will become.
So I spent the whole of last week snowboarding. Because I'm a person who just goes for things and doesn't think about the consequences, I decided to buy a helmet. I was practicing jumps and I intended to keep my head safe, because I'd already hurt it a few times.
I saw my friend at the end of the week, and she looked at my helmet and said ''God, you're such a pussy. Only amateurs wear helmets''
I personally thought that wanting to keep myself safe doesn't make me a ''pussy'' nor an amateur. Or am I just over-reacting?
What are your thoughts on this?
She hit a soft spot, and she probably didn't intend to. Forgive and forget, and if it happens again you can worry about it.
i am not really a social person.
and these holidays i haven't planned or want to plan any thing with friends.
My parents continue to pressure me too but i don't want to. i am going through a phase when i'm not sure who my real friends are.
I don't want to tell them and if i don't organize i have to clean up our house.
Can you give me some advice on how to tell who my real friends are and how to want to be socialable with my friends.
:)
You're not going to believe it, but the way to get your parents off your back is to tell them what's up. Keep it simple and say your growing up, and lately you've been searching more for the meaning of life instead of a social life
well ill start off simple
im 17, a guy... and if anything i try to hard to help people but this problem caught me off guard.
"She" is 17 very very pretty with a great mind and i think i like her in that way (although i try hard not to because i can see my self being hurt because she always does stuff like i am about to explain) she has a boyfreind and has had him for over a year now untill new years eve when she kissed his brother... HIS BROTHER!!! its none of my buisness to get into her relationship life BUT HIS BROTHER!?!? its because i think i love her that i want to help her, iv told her before that i like her but i think that she thinks that i'v gone off her a bit (i havent) anyway she explained it to me like this..
*after i kept asking who she was texting* she addmitted it was her bf's brother and i asked why so much smiling while you text? she told me the story of how she was drunk and he started it. and its the first day back at college today and all i thought about what why does she love to live so closley with her bf and then start teasing and even having sex with other guys she hardly knows. though i am complaining about her being like this towards other people i am not exactly perfect... for last year, we kinda had a thing going she came round my house to do some course work or so i thought and she kissed me out of no were so i got really nervous (like i allways do) and i got confused and didnt want to tell her no but she really tried it on that day. (i realised at the time it was wrong but i was lonely and surprised at what she was doing) after that i got really depressed for like a week because of what we were doing. i told her how i felt and we both started crying about it.. anyway i blew my chance for her then which is what i want now because, although shes an amazing freind it wouldnt work out for me at all if we were to take our relationship further because i wouldnt be able to trust her ANYWAY i got that off my chest now please help me to try and help her realise what it is shes doing! she cant be that dense can she?!? seriously..
major thanks in advance. i'll give feedback on every answer like i allways do
Stop getting this image in your head that she is some poor girl who needs to be helped. If you feel that way it is because she is only coming to you to cry on your shoulder. Also, get the picture out of your head that one day she is going to have an epiphany and realize she loved you all along. It sounds like she may have some emotional issues, but you are in no position to help her, because it can only hurt you.