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I hope that if you come to this site, you feel at least some reassurance. Life is messy, life isn't perfect, and I love that there is a place, virtual as it is that can acknowledge this. I don't pretend to be perfect or know everything, but I promise that if you ask me a question, or if I see one and take an interest, I will answer it as best I can.Check out my forum here:
http://www.advicenators.com/talkaboutme.php?userboard_id=41589
to post/comment on a topic =]
advice
A lot of places I go, I turn heads, get asked for my number, and have a lot of guys talk to me or something. I am not trying to sounds conceided at all. But at school, it seems like nobody really does that. Im a cheerleader for my school, and I thought that would help me with the guys, just because I would be around them a lot more, but it hasn't really. There are a few guys that like me at school, but for some reason it is different. I feel uglier at school than anywhere else, and it seems like that is the truth. I am also told I look like 3 years older then I actually am a lot and am told things like wow your hot and so forth, but never at school so much when I meet new people. I dress and act the same everywhere I go, so why do I get so much attention everywhere but school? I am not an attention freak or anything haha I just am really confused why it is like this. Sorry this is long!!
It could be the way you yourself feel at school. You are just one of however many students attend it. Alone you are you, you are confident, you can feel like the prettiest girl in the room because perhaps you are walking down the sidewalk with one other guy and no girls around. You can just be yourself without worrying about impressing anyone.
At school, you are surrounded by your peers who are in the exact same position as you trying to get good grades, fit in, do whatever they are trying to do. As well, anyone who goes to school with you will likely see you the next day, and the next, and the next. To the outside world, you are a stranger passing through someone's life. A guy could hit on you and potentially see you again, or could keep going and never see you again. Either way he has nothing to loose, and potentially has things to gain. If he hits on you and looks like a moron, he has lost nothing and will likely never see you ever again.
in the parent trap, do you know where there is a video on youtube or something of the secret handshake that the twins do in the movie? haha i wanna learn it
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fDzY7VN2Cz0
In future, go to youtube and look this up before asking on this site.
Well This year I want to wear a proper outfit for swimming like normal people, like a bikini but I want to cover more of my body so I'm wearing shorts.
If I'm flat chested, should I even be wearing a bikini top? Or am I supposed to wear a t-shirt or soemthing?
You should wear what you want to wear. We are all born with different body shapes, and the size of everyone's chest is so different that if there was only a specific chest type that could pull off a bikini, you would see a lot more girls in t-shirts. While you are worried about your chest size, there are girls with sizable chests that won't wear a bikini because they are worried about showing the world their stomachs. Wear a t-shirt or a something if you want to, but don't wear one out of shame. Learn to love your body because the fact that each body is different really does make everyone special in their own way.
my boy friend and I are having our one year october 9th but theirs just one problem we dont know what to do for it! we are deeply in love and want to remember this special day. We dont have money for jewelery or anything and its on a school day but we're taking school off so please give me some great ideas thank you
The best thing you can do isn't always the most expensive or the most hallmark-esque. It's not about really what you do together; it's about the fact that you are together, and celebrating your anniversary. Yay! Congratulations!
There are lots of different things that you could do; my main advice is to be creative. Think of inside jokes that you two share. Think of the first time you went out, what you did then, how you felt. Flowers aren't the most original thing but are usually always a yes. Handmade cards are also good, because then you can cheesily describe everything you love about him and being in a relationship with him in a way that's completely personal and special. Burning a CD is something I'm sure you've heard before, along with the scrapbook idea. If you have some sort of artistic talent this usually comes in handy. Try anything that reminds you of him and it doesn't have to even be a lot - a song, a quote, a smile. And tell him you love him (if you love him).
For what you should do, anything that involves being together is good. You may want to go somewhere special, ie research stuff to do that is interesting but not too expensive around your area (you can do this online). Like I said, though, it doesn't really matter what you do - long walks around pretty places, baking cookies, having a picnic, chocolate - as long as you are together appreciating each other. This day is obviously very special for the both of you, so I am sure that he will enjoy whatever you end up planning/doing since it is ultimately the thought that counts.
ok so me and my boyfriend went out for just over a month and on friday a dumped him because a felt like he was to serious. i was 17 when a started dating him and now am 18 and hes 23 and he keps saying he loves me and that if he could hed ask me 2 get engaged and i just thought it was all to fast and to serious for me am not ready to settle down. see what the problem is he goes o bout how much he loves me that hes talking about goin away and he sent me a suicide letter other night but hes fine hes still alive and he told me hes engaved my name in him with a knife and now a feel like crap cause ive hurt him real bad did i do the right thing by ending it? also before we wnet out we were friends and he was talking bout leaving coz all he wanted was me and kept asking me to give him a chance so a felt sort of presure into goin out with him. im worried he will do something stupid because of what he used to be like. he has told me bout his past but a dont no wether hes telling me the truth or not he hangs about with 13 year olds which a think is weird especially when hs 23 and he went out with one of the 13 year olds and slept with her when she turned 14 and he told me he never had sex with her so now am thinking has hebeen lyig to me bout everything what do you think has he been lying and did i do right thing by dumping him? sorry its so long
I'm not sure if he is lying or not. It all depends on who told the other story, who told you he slept with a fourteen year old and how credible this source is, versus his word. Trust your own instinct on that.
In my own personal opinion (and you are entitled to your own opinion on this one) you did the right thing by dumping him. He was bringing you into a type of relationship that you weren't ready for. The only way for a relationship to really survive and exist in a healthy way is if the two people in it feel the same way about it. Don't feel guilty about him attempting suicide, or harming himself, because while as a friend you should probably look out for him in these types of situations, you do not owe him anything and you certainly do not owe him a relationship that you are not ready for. You shouldn't give into pressure to be in a relationship at all unless it is something that you want for you and not to make the other person happy.
No, it is not normal that he hangs around with thirteen year olds. But it is more serious that he is thinking of attempting suicide. As a friend concerned for his life, you should do whatever you can (while respecting yourself and your own personal boundaries) to see that he gets help.
13/f
My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost a month now, and we still havn't kissed. We've made out before we were going out at a party, but since we've been dating we havn't.
It's really weird because we spend a lot of time together and we're comfortable around each other but I just can't bring myself to make that move and kiss him, and he hasn't tried to kiss me either.
When I met him around six months ago I thought he was the most amazing person I had ever met, and would ever meet, but he was in love with someone else, and it made me so depressed. However, I figured I could be friends with him, but now, I'm worried I became too close friends with him, maybe too comfortable around him.
Usually when you start dating someone you get that anticipation and you don't want them to see you without makeup and things like that. But in those six months, he became one of my closest friends, and I'm worried that that's why it's not working now.
I don't feel as strongly for him as I used to either.
Also I have very little experience and I think that's worrying em too.
I just don't know what to do, any ideas?
Thanks in advance, xxx
Don't worry so much about it. It could be that you are just getting comfortable with each other but the whole attraction without actually knowing the person thing is wearing off. It could also be that you are drifting towards the friends zone (which is what you are worried about, am I correct?). Either way, both are not terrible things. Be natural around him like you already are and don't feel like you should be kissing or like you have to kiss. You really don't have to if you don't want to, or if it's going to be uncomfortable. Not kissing, even in a relationship, is really okay. Besides, a month isn't really a huge amount of time, and like you said, you are getting to know each other. The best relationships are based more on this and less on the physical parts of dating, appealing as they may seem. In these relationships, people are truly comfortable with each other, and one thing that really keeps people together, after the passion is gone and it's just two people in love, is the friendship. Don't think that the fact that you actually are friends with the guy you are dating is a bad thing. It would be bad if you were only friends, but the fact that you know how to be friends with each other only adds to the relationship.
If you are really worried (though you probably don't have to - I mean, even in the worse scheme of things he becomes your friend instead of your boyfriend which isn't the worst that could happen), you could always try to be more touchy feely with him in general. It might be too much pressure where you either kiss him or don't kiss him but you can't do anything in between. Tease him but let him know you're kidding by smiling, and maybe touch him lightly when you tease him. Hold his hand, or put your arm around him. Try giving him a hug. You don't want to do anything that feels out of character, but being physically closer to him and breaking the touch barrier helps if it is kissing that you want.
Experience shouldn't be an issue; you are 13 and a lot of people start getting any sort of experience later than that.
Just enjoy being with him; that's the whole point of having a boyfriend in the first place.
... yeah so I need new music. You can give me indiviual songs or bands. Preferably not your typical pop punk band/alternative band that sounds just like everythint else.
My favorite bands are: My Chemical Romance, The Academy Is..., Fall Out Boy, Pencey Prep, Jack's Mannequin, Something Corporate, The Rocket Summer, All Time Low, The Beatles, Cartel, The Hush Sound, Paramore, Rise Against, Taking Back Sunday, +44, Blink 182.
[This part is not necessary to know to give me some songs, I just feel like explaining.]
I love MCR, and I just can't find another band I love as much as them. So I'm desperately searching to find another band that I love like I love them.
Panic! At the Disco (a lot like fall out boy)
3 Doors Down
Augustana (A little more mellow)
the all-american rejects
Coldplay
Copeland
The Killers
Death Cab for Cutie
the Goo-Goo Dolls
Finger Eleven
Five For fighting ( a little more mellow)
The Fray
Gym Class Heros
Hoobastank
Lifehouse (one of my faves)
Linkin Park
Nickelback
Oasis
Our lady Peace
Plain White T's
Red Jumpsuit Apparatus
Relient K
Saosin (though they do sound similar to a lot of bands)
Seether
Snow Patrol
Theory of a Dead Man
Trapt
The Veronicas (more of a girl punk pop sound but still really good)
Within Temptation (very different. Gothic Rock from the UK)
I find personally, that the best way to find new music is to search a song into www.radioblogclub.com
Each song is displayed in a blog that has a bunch of other bands/ singers from similar or the same genre as the music you look up. It's how I found a lot of the music I now listen to =]
Good luck. MCR is a really good band.
okay well if you are a guy. im warning you anyways. lol ok.. here I go.
So then sometimes my chest doesn't hurt. there pretty much small.. I'm 13/f and i dont wear a "Cup" bra yet. but thats not my problem ( even though i am a bit self concious bout that), it sometimes just itchh really bad. and i think sometimes i see like a scab or something on it? is that normal? Thanks.
No, that isn't normal. You should probably see a doctor about this, preferably a female one =] (it doesn't actually matter, just that it might make you feel more comfortable).
I honestly couldn't tell you what this is, possibly a rash? In any case, a doctor could diagnose you much better than anyone on this site.
okay i have this guy in my class. i like him he is really cute funny and respects girls which is really hard to find these days. anyway all the time in class me and him happen to look up at each other at the same time almost EVERY time and it really bothers me because i don't know if he is staring because he notices me staring or if he is just staring becasue he wants to. we usually hold it for a few seconds and both look down and start working again. he is a sophmore and is really outgoing and im a freshman really shy and i don't talk to many people. i know one of his friends likes me but i don't think that is why he is looking at me. He does it everyday and its making me nervous i don't know what to think about it. by the way i heven't talked to him at all before. i wouldtalk to him but i get really nervous and butterflys and i just chicken out because i don't know what to say. i justwanted some advice on what you think is happening in class.
He's staring at you because he likes you. Why else would someone stare at you because they wanted to? (There may be another reason but it would have to be very bizarre).
Forget about your butterflies and just talk to him. It seems like, however awkward this may be, that he will really appreciate you for it. There is no way you can really screw up an encounter like this unless you don't go for it, a simple hi is okay, or if you are so inclined "were you checking me out?" or just say something about what's going on in the class so he can give his own opinion. Try waiting till the class is over and, as people start to trickle out, start filing out of class by his side. You can make it look like it just took you this exact amount of time to pack up your books naturally that coincidentally makes you leave the class at the exact same time that he does. Or, you could just walk up to him during a work period, or before class and start up a conversation. If he looks at you as much as you say he does, he'll love it that you're talking to him. Even if what you say doesn't make sense or isn't that witty, you have said something, and have broken the ice.
Or you could try talking to him online if you are really shy/so inclined.
okay so i was just wandering is it true kissing or making out comes kind of natrually?
I think it really depends on the person. A lot of people say it comes naturally, though personally when it was my first kiss, I pretty much had no clue what I was doing. The first kiss is the first, and it's almost like learning a new language, and it does take some practice to come completely naturally, unless you do find someone experienced enough so you can just follow their lead. I suggest, for your first time, you find someone you genuinely care about and who genuinely cares about you. Afterwards you'll feel special for sharing something sacred in a moment together with that one person, and the skill of the kiss won't actually matter.
My boyfriend and i always fight and argue and im so sick of it and i always end up in tears i hate it so much :( ok well this what happened yesterday and i need help.
Well My boyfriend lets name him John and his friends name bob ok Bob is my boyfriends friend and Bob was flirting with me the day before and next week im going out and
Bob-Im comming
Me- lol COME COME
Bob-lol i will
Me-bring JOHN xD
Bob- lol
Me-BRING HIM !
Bob-I think i should i will
Anyways ok and his friend asked for my number but i didn't give my number and he was just kinda flirty
So i told my boyfriend the story and he got mad at me ='[ and i love him so much loosing him is like loosing my life ='[ and i know if i talk to him it's just gonna end in a fight and i dont think his gonna go on msn now and when i text he dosnt text back and im not calling so dont tell me to call him but i just really want to talk to him and sometimes we just argue over the most stupidest things any help and also any advice on how to stop our little arguments ='[ ?
Sorry it's long.
Your boyfriend could be mad because what your version of flirting is and his are probably very different, ei he is probably not quite understanding whatever happened and therefore is overreacting. Instead of telling him you were flirting, tell him how you acted. Tell him how much he means to you and how much you actually don't have feelings for this other guy.
Since you are arguing a lot for no reason, you should probably address this. Tell him that it's not fun when you fight, or tell him that you are concerned about it. You need to communicate with your boyfriend that sometimes you enjoy attention from guys, but don't want to ever make him uncomfortable. Although he is mad and needs some reassuring, you also have needs and one of them is being able to live without him always being mad about it.
Although you really do love your boyfriend, it may be unfair to be restricted/ someone that he is mad . Hopefully talking to him will help, but you have to also look out for yourself, and make sure that you are in a relationship that is making you happy instead of one making you upset.
I have been with my current girlfriend for almost 2 years and im 100% sure she's "The One". We have had plans to move in together when she finishes High School soon. We want to live in Texas because we both think it would be the best place for "US". Then in the last few months she has started to want "US" to live in Pennsylvania in an aprtment around her mom for 2 years then move to Texas. She's starting to go threw that point where every parent and child starts to relize they arent children anymore. She think's that waiting 2 more years will make it less hard to leave her mom. I have explained to her that it wont no matter how long she waits it's still gonna be hard for anyones parent no matter how long you wait. I think the best thing to do would be get it over with now itstead and be over it 2 years from now instead of wasting time to find out it wont be easier in 2 years. So in simple words she wants to live in Texas no matter what but she wants to live in Pennsylvania for 2 years. We have made a budget together to workout the figures and the budget shows we wont be able to live 2 years in Pennsylvania then move to Texas. So what should i do?!?!?
The budget is quite likely to put both of you through debt, no matter what you do, because you are still young and will have to pay for many things for the first time without being able to get the same salary you would be able to get once you are older. The most important thing now is to figure out what will make the both of you happy and if that happens to put you through debt, figure out a way to pay it off later (ei, are you planning to go through college and inevitably go through debt and then get a really good job because of it later? What kind of an income will you have later on?). Another thing is that your girlfriend seems to be making a lot of the decisions. Have you thought about where you would like to live?
How would I go about getting my parents to get me a puppy (a toy/miniature one)
I've been asking them for years (it's been 9-ish years now, I'm 16) yet they think up some excuse since my brother neglected his cat :(.
Show that you are responsible, perhaps by helping around the house, or doing something good that you don't normally do (ei if you are a slacker in school, start working hard to improve your grades, or promise you will and then follow through with it). There are many reasons why your parents may not want you to get a dog. Talk to them about it. If they are worried that it is a huge responsibility, then prove that you are responsible. If they are worried about the price, offer to raise some money, or to help pay for the costs of buying it and raising it. If they just have a general fear of animals then research the breed you like extensively online, everything from what it needs to eat to which treats are the best to feed it when it does something good. For every excuse, do something that proves that the dog is a good idea, and more importantly, that you can handle it.
If all else fails, remember that in two years you will be eighteen with the option of leaving home, and will be able to buy a dog for yourself then.
Does anyone know of a safe place where you can download free music? I had Limewire but in the past few weeks, Ive heard it has been monitered by the government. Thanks a lot!!
Search "bttorrent" using google then download the latest version. Then you can use a variety of bittorrent downloading websites such as www.thepiratebay.org
As for the legality of what you are doing. It actually depends on the country you live in. In Canada, for example, downloading music from peer to peer networks is in fact legal.
i really really like my best guy friend. i was going to tell him but before i had the chance this other girl told him she liked him. so they went out for a few weeks but now they broke up about 2 days ago. my first question is, when is the right time to let him know im interested in him? and the second question is, how do i tell him im interested in him, i flirt with him all the time and he hasn't seemed to get the hint .
If you already flirt with him all of the time, how do you know he doesn't know you like him? He could be really dense, in which case you should just tell him. However, it could also be that he doesn't like you back, or that he likes you but doesn't know what to do about it. Think about it, he just got out of a relationship two days ago.
You should probably judge how he reacts to you before you tell him you like him. Does he flirt back, or is he just being your friend (ei flirting, but he doesn't get any sort of cushy look in his eye or get involved in the flirting and just lets you flirt with him instead of participating much). If it's hard to tell and or you think he's dense, wait a while just to be safe. It may not have been that serious of a relationship, but be sensible enough not to ask him out, say, tomorrow. Since you two are close, you can ask him about the girl. Say you are sorry about what happened, and find out how he feels about the whole thing. Once he has moved on, ask him out somewhere. Tell him you like him, but don't rush anything just yet.
hey im a freshman in highschool and i've decided i really want a boyfriend. there are a few boys i like or that im interested in who i think i could have the potential of us going out (knock on wood) i was just wondering how could i tell them i like them without freaking them out? i mean if i told them i liked them a lot in front of their face out of the blue that would probably catch them off gaurd and scare them off. do you have any flirting tricks that give them signs that i like them?
thanks. guys also please answer this question to from a guy's point of view!
If you go up to a guy you like and say "hi (person) I really like you" then they will most definitely freak out. It puts pressure on them to say something, or do something, and they may not like you back. However, if you have shown other, subtler, more physical signs that you like them, and they have reciprocated to show that they like you, confessing that you have feelings for that said person isn't freaky because you are just acknowledging what already exists.
If you like a guy, you have to let them know in a way that doesn't put that much pressure on them, and in a way where they can get out of the situation if they don't like it/ there is no pressure. Instead of telling them anything outright, try flirting with them subtly. Tease them while smiling and tilting your head to one side. Playfully take something of theirs. And then judge their reaction. If they naturally get into it and tease you back, and both of you start leaning closer together, then voila, you have established something without making it awkward or facing any sort of rejection. And if they aren't so into you, you can find out and they have the option of walking away from the situation if they want to.
Saying you like someone can be a big deal and guys might not know how to handle it. It's almost easier to ask a guy out because then he can say yes or not and judge how he really feels about you once he has spent time with you.
Although I think all of us have the freak out commitmentophobe part of us that should not be provoked, eventually you should really tell a guy how you feel, but be sure he's ready for it when you do.
ok so the boy that i like was in my gym class last year, we always talked, sat together and lunch, and even hung out a few times durring the year. then i didnt talk to him once over the summer, and now in the hall its like her never even met me. we dont have any classes or lunches together and i've said hi to him in the hall once. i really want to at least be friends with him again this year, what should i do? and does he even remember me? ehh.
That's very bizarre that all of the sudden you wouldn't be talking. It could be that he has found a new group of friends, or maybe since you haven't talked in a while it's just awkward to suddenly start again. Be bold, and walk up to him. Start a random conversation. You could start by saying "Oh my God, I haven't talked to you in so long!" or something to that effect. You could also try dropping him a line saying "how is everything lately? Haven't seen you in a while." Be casual about it, but at the same time if he's going to be weird about approaching you just going up to him and getting the random silence between you over with is probably going to make you feel a lot better than if you wait and nothing ends up happening.
since i was 13 and got my period, i've been exactly on schedule every month when getting my period. i usually play school soccer in the fall, exercising every day at practice after school.. however this year i am not playing soccer and so my exercising activity has decreased dramatically this fall. can this affect my period schedule? because i'm a week late for the first time ever! however i've also been sexually active since june, (always use protection).. and never have had the experience of a condom ripping.. but since i'm a week late for the first time ever, i'm scared about what it might mean. is it just the sudden change of exercise level?
Not exercising would probably make your periods more regular, and it probably isn't a baby if you've been using proper protection. Just in case, however, you may want to think back to times when possibly you got some precum or cum inside of you.
What you're probably experiencing is your period randomly being late. It may feel unusual to you since normally they are so regular, however I'd probably be more surprised if you continued having a regular period for the rest of your life than if it was irregular part of the time.
so my boyfriend is equally as shy as me, if not more, and let's say i'm on the short side of outgoing stick.
we were ok hanging out with each other and talking to each other before we were dating, but now that we are, it's all akward.
i don't know what to do about this.
anyone have a solution to my problem?
PS: saying "jus go over and talk to him" or something to tghat degree won't help. i've tried that and i'm still trying it.
thanks in advance. :D
Well it could be how you both see each other now that you are dating. Before it was more low key, and you probably felt you could just say random things, crazy ridiculous things, pointless things. Now that you are in a relationship, when you are together you may feel more pressure - like maybe there is the unspoken/spoken pressure to be kissing, or holding hands, or to look good and not be ridiculous on a date to impress the other person. Maybe you just both feel awkward with dating because you're not really sure what you're "supposed" to be doing, or what you "should" talk about.
I know you don't want me to say "just go over and talk to him". Honestly, though, what other choices do you have? Fly in with a team of armed ninjas to move his mouth up and down and force sounds out of it?
Forget the idea that you are dating so must somehow act different, and just say random things ("I'm so tired." "I hate biology." "It was so cool, I submitted something and it got in!" "K so there was this quiznos sign that said 'having an affair? We cater'") . Ask him "why do we never talk anymore?" or say "We don't talk as much anymore" so he gets that it bugs you. Get together with him and also a group of other people, preferably chatty people, so that they will start a conversation and he or you will hopefully be part of it, hence having an indirect conversation, but a conversation nonetheless. If all else fails, you like each other, so there is that element of flirting that you can do whenever the conversation is terrible or you don't know what to say. Tease him, play with his hair, put your arm around him, "sleep" on his shoulder and playfully call him your pillow, or anything that causes tiny sparks between you which can fill awkward silences and provoke flirty conversations. Also, there is the internet where many people feel more comfortable saying things online, so you could always try that.
14/f
my boyfriend and i have been dating a year this friday.
i love him to death, like id really take a bullet for him to death. And yes i really mean that.
Well he kinda flirts with other girls. (he used to be a "playa" before he met me)
well when im mad at him, or i want someone to notice me because he doesnt, or because i thought he was flirting with another girl, i tend to flirt with guys,normally these two specific guys, just to make him jealous sometimes, that and i want attention. Well today he kinda brought it up.
He said him and his other friend were talking about how they noticed it last year too. he didnt say exactly what i did or who i did it with. but im pretty sure he meant that i was flirting with this guy, and since last year. he said he didnt want to start anything so he wouldnt tell me.
i want to tell him what i did because i feel guilty even though all i did was flirt and give these guys hugs.i want to explain to him about how i was jealous but i dont even like the guys, except for one but he is like an older brother to me. i know my boyfriend thinks i like these guys but i really dont. and i dont want him to get mad at me for what i did, and i know it was totally wrong..(i liked the attention i didnt get from my boyfriend)
so how do i tell him that it didnt mean anything and that i was flirting with those guys??
Well you were flirting to make him jealous - and it sounds like it worked. It doesn't mean anything to you, and hopefully it doesn't in general, as long as you didn't go overboard with the flirting. Generally, it's perfectly fine to tease and hug guy friends as long as you don't actually have anything else in mind, see them in a non-friends way, or give them the wrong impression. Flirting, at some level, can be harmless and a fun way to get attention, and it sounds like your boyfriend the "playa" already understands this.
If you wish to bring up the situation with your boyfriend,you may want to bring up the times when he makes you upset/feeling unnoticed/like he's flirting too much with girls, especially if they are a pattern thing (ei does he excessively flirt with girls and it always bugs you). The fact that you go to other guys specifically for attention after you are upset at your boyfriend is probably normal but also not the best thing in general. If you wish to readdress the flirting, also be sure to mention that you don't feel anything at all from those guys. Maybe you could make fun of the situation a bit, for example saying how funny it is that those guys find you so attractive, or you could say something about how it's a shame how all boys are so attracted to you when there's no way you could even consider them. Mostly be as truthful as possible, I mean you don't have that much to hide anyway since what you were doing might offend your boyfriend but it's actually not that bad (or if it's really mild flirting it shouldn't be a problem). It sounds like your boyfriend just wants to know where you stand with these guys, so saying that you've never looked at them as more than friends, and that you love him, will be enough.