about

Hey everyone!My name is Brina,I've been on this site for a few years, after not being on for a while, I figured I'd start up again, having more knowledge then before! I'm 19 years old and am going to be a sophomore in college this coming fall! Please feel free to ask me anything!


I'VE BEEN VERY BUSY WITH SCHOOL SO MY APOLOGIES IF I DON'T GET TO YOUR QUESTIONS RIGHT AWAY!

advice

I just got my tongue pierced and i got these sore throat lozenges. It says "with pain numbing relief" and it also says "Benzocaine/menthol oral anesthetic lozenges"

Would this be okay to get rid of the pain and swelling?

I'd assume so if their pain numbing relief. Maybe ask your doctor first. Your deffinitly able to put ice on it, that should make the swelling go down. Just keep on doing what you have to do to keep it clean. Hope I helped.Happy Summer :)
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-Brina

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I was at my friend lillys house for her 15th birthday with a few other people. Everything was great we were doing manicures and making prank calls. But then it got really late and everyone got a sugar rush and were bouncing off the walls it was crazy! Well I was sitting on top of Lillys dresser next to her cousin Jenna and all of the sudden Jenna started rubbing my feet and telling me how soft my skin was....it really weirded me out. Everyone laughed like it was a joke...but it didnt seem like a joke to her. She looked kinda like my boyfriend does right after we make out. Should I be weirded out by this? I'm going to her house again on tuesday and her cousin will be there, and I'm kinda scared...should I be? Hellllp!

Of course you should be weirded out, but dont be scared. If she does it again, feel free to tell her to please stop touching her. And don't be afraid to either, its called personal space. Hope I helped!

-Brina

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if im 13/f and bout 5'7- 5'8ish how much should i weigh??

Hmmm doctors say if your tall you should not think 100 -120 is a good weight to be. Tall people arent meant to be skinny as a bone because if they weight 100, they will look like they are skin and bones. Models may look skinny, but there weight isnt low, but not high. I'd say you should be in between 120 and 170. Hope I helped.


-Brina

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my best friend and i used to be together all the time but now she got rid of her old friends but kept me and has started hanging out with her old best friend, getting wasted and doing drugs..she even has turned emo! I still want to be her friend really badly but its just so awkward now all she talks about is what she did when she was stoned or wasted, its so annoying. What do i do, i dont really want to start doing drugs with her but i still want to be her friend..i just hate that we will never be able to talk or hang out like we used to.

Hey, sorry this took so long to answer, I've been away at camp. Hmm, I understand how you want to still hang out with her and stuff, considering she is a good friend of yours. But, if it makes you feel uncomfortable when she talks to you about drugs and stuff, do you really want to be her friend? Right now, you've got to give her time, still talk to her and such. You might not talk for a while, but she'll probably turn around, and realize that your her true friend. Yes, thats quite annoying when people talk about being stoned and stuff, its actually imature because its pretty much in their way, "gloating about it". Give it time. Hope I helped, enjoy your summer.

-Brina

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Well me and my boyfriend have been going out for like 4 months and i love him alot, but i kind of get jelous when he is around other girls. i dont know how to stop doing this i have tried acting like i dont care but i really cant help it.

Sorry it took so long to answer this! I've been at camp. Hmm, well, I think you just need to really come to trust him. If he's flirting with girls, then you shouldnt be jelous, you should be concerned. He shouldnt put them before you. Just, try to understand, that your his girlfriend, and theirs no one else for him at this point. And if you think about it, its ok, but, don't let this take over your relationship. Hope I helped, enjoy your summer.


-Brina

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I just bought tall boots, and I'm interested in how they feel? Like, do they work like half chaps with more grip? and how long does it take to break them in? (i'm leaving for sleepaway camp in week, with riding, and i wont be able to ride with them at my lesson barn before i leave) thanks!

They'll probably take 3 days to wear in. Wear them everywere you go. They'll probably feel weird at first. Have fun at camp! Sorry this took so long to answer

-Brina

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Hey Advicenators-
I was 10, and in the 5th grade. Then in January, some boy who I never knew noticed was in my dance/music class came up to me, did some freaky hand thing. I called him idiot, he gasped, and was left speechless. Since then, I have loved him.

After that, he did all sorts of things. If I was absent, the next day he would say "Oh, so you're here today." When our teacher told us to pair up with a boy, he asked me, and I said no and hid behind the wall, so I wouldn't dance with a boy. He asked me my name. I would never tell him. He found out, by grabbing my books. He walked me to class. I still never gave in to him. He got left back though, and me being in the top class, graduated.

I thought I wouldn't see him, since I went to Junior High (weird I know, we graduate in 5th grade instead of 6th). Our Junior High is only 3 blocks away from my elementary school. I saw him countless times on the bus. He went to sixth grade when I went to seventh. He always was looking at me, and I would look at him.

Now, I'm in 8th grade about to graduate in two days. After that, I don't have to come back to school, but I will. He has the same S.S. teacher as I did last year, so I'm gonna hang out with my teacher for the whole 4 more days of school. I'm gonna try to talk to that boy. Hopefully, he will still talk to me.

I still love this boy. I have loved him since 5th grade, for more than 3 years, and my love never dies, or wears off. Other boys I've liked come and go from my heart, but his spirit never leaves.

My questions:

1. Did this boy ever like me?
2. Do you think I have a chance with him?
3. If he does talk to me, how do I spill that I love him?
4. What do I do if he rejects my love?

Sorry that it's so long.
Please answer, and Alpha345 a.k.a. Ryan, please answer this question. You say you know what love is.

I rate high.

First off, that is so adorable how you fell in love with him. haha. But anyways, yes, theirs a good chance that he liked you. You could have a chance with him too. I think, it'll be totally awesome, and he probably will too if the next time you see him, and your near him, just be like. "Wow, can you believe since 5th grade I still get butterfly's in my stomach when i see you" He will most likely think thats so brave of you to do that. If he rejects your love, its ok. There are plenty of other fish in the sea. Not every single guy you like will have the same feelings for you unfortunately. Its not just you, girls and guys go through the same thing. Deffinitly talk to him when you see him. Never regret anything you do in life. Good Luck, hope I helped. Enjoy summer!

-Brina

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My family is all going to go to Wisconsin next Thursday-Sunday. I do not want to go and neither does my mom. We would both go if my dad let us stay in a hotel, but he said that it is too much money. My grandfather (My grandfather is who we are going there to see.) keep his house at 95 degrees and I'm not joking. There aren't even enough beds in his house! He can't hear a word that I say and I'm have strep right now so, I'm not going to talk any louder than I normally do. I really do not want to go up to Wisconsin (Mom said that she's staying here) so, how do I convince my dad to not make me go?

I rate 5's for anyone who tries

Hmm. Let him know its nothing against grandpa, but the 95 degree house will probably make you feel even more sick. Have you told him that you can't stand the heat? Explain to him that it'll be uncomfortable for you, considering there arent enough beds. Or, talk to your mom, and tell your dad your going to have a "girls weekend". Good Luck! Hope I helped.


-Brina

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well i have never really done IT but im afraid too
i heard stuff like you bleed
it hurts
etc.


people think im lesbian because im to afraid to get sexual

and guys scare because there whores
at least around here
i mean once iget a boyfreind and trust him
sure
but im really scared



because when i do get one
im afraid because i have never really done any hardcore sexual things






WHAT DO I DO
this is really gross
but i have no one to turn for advice
its to embarrassing to ask someone in person

Don't be embarrassed to talk to anyone about this. That is absolutely bull crap that people think your a lesbian because your afraid to get sexual. If you don't want to get sexual with anyone, then you absolutely do not have to! How old are you? 15- 19? When you get a boyfriend, you don't need to have sex with him. Because others are does not mean you have to. I'm not an expert when it comes to sex. Considering, i've never had sex before, but, from other advicenators, and looking up advice for people who ask about sex, you don't always bleed, and it doesn't always hurt. You need to make sure you find the guy for you before you go off and have sex. Seems like theres a lot of assholes in your school. So, better make sure who you can trust. Your better off waiting till your older. The people in your school who are all having sex are just plain stupid. They probably think that having sex is mature, when its not, exspecially at there age. Your the mature one because your worried about it, and not just going off doing it.Good Luck hun. Hope I helped. And, dont do anything your not comfortable with.

-Brina

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Mkay.

I'm dating this guy. Ryan. We have been dating for about three weeks now, Yeah, I know - It's not that long. But this isn't the first time we dated.

My best friend, almost hooked up with the same guy. But we went out one night and she did things with another guy and almost went all the way. Ryan found out and told me about two months ago that he didn't want a girl like that, So we started talking more, My bestfreind hates it with a passion. She claims that she wants him to die and that she hates him and doesn't want anything to do with him ever again, and that she has no feelings left for him what so ever, So I thought - What the heck, I'll date him and give him a chance.

We started dating. My bestfriend found out and told me, it's me or him. Take your pick. Of course, I chose my best friend. Me and Ryan broke up. Then about two weeks later, me and Ryan started talking about, and everything was cool with my bestfriend, We even pledged to not let another guy get between us ever again. Everything was perfect, So I gave Ryan another chance. I told my best friend, but she was too drunk to remember that I said anything.

Last night I hung out with both of them. My bestfriend was a complete ass to Ryan and I felt bad but I couldn't do much because I hate being in the middle of fights, So I just stood there and talked to all my other friends. Apperently everyone but my bestfriend knew that me and Ryan were dating. Well, I didn't want to tell my bestfreind last night either because we were not only with a buncha friends but she was also wasted.. So I didn't say anything.

Somehow, she found out. She called Ryan and completely bitch slapped him and called him on everything. I haven't talked to her yet but I'm not so sure I want to. I don't know what to do because I know it's going to come down to the same thing, Her or Him. I don't want to choose for the sake of myself, but what do I do?

I'll rate 5s.

You shouldn't have to choose between your friend or boyfriend. Want to know why? Well, let me tell you a little story first, that i've told to people that are goign through the same situation. A while back, my "friend" told me to choose between her and another friend of mine. And I said to her, if you were my friend you wouldnt have a problem with this. DO you know how much pressure that is from a friend to make you decide that? You shouldnt have to brake up with your boyfriend because you have to make a decision. Tell your friends either they take you or leave you, because this whole thing is immature. Hope I helped.

-Brina

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Well, Im a freshman and my boyfriends a senior. [Except were only 2 years apart]. He got a scholarship to go to away to college before we'd gotten together. So I knew that he'd be leaving when we started going out. [3 1/2 months ago] I love him very much, and Im going to hate to see him leave. He says that he might only stay one simester because he'll miss me too much... :/ but i dunnooo. anyway.. i was just wondering if you think I should break up with him now.. so i don't get more attached when he leaves, or wait until right before he leaves for college?

Aww, dont break up with him. I know you'll miss your boyfriend a lot, but don't you want to see him enjoy college, and get a great job in the future because of college? You should know, that you two will stay together even if he goes to college. You can call each other, write, email, IM, all of those things. And, college students have so many holidays weekends and long breaks off. You will talk and see plenty of each other. Its fine to feel this way about things before he goes to college, but if you two love each other, its not necissary to break up. My opinion, like i said, is that you should really tell him to go to college. Tell him to strive for his dreams. Good Luck, Hope I helped.

-Brina

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All my friends told me that my boyfriend was flirting with other girls so i asked my boyfriend about it and he said he wasnt and i believed him. My friends got mad at me because i didnt listen to them and they kept telling me that hes an asshole and all that. Then they told me that i had to pick between staying with my boyfriend and having no friends or breaking up with him and having friends. There was no way I could break up with him so we decided to keep dating and to not tell our friends. Is this the right thing to do or should i just dump him for good?

No, you should abosolutely not dump him. Want to know why? Well, let me tell you a little story first. A while back, my "friend" told me to choose between her and another friend of mine. And I said to her, if you were my friend you wouldnt have a problem with this. DO you know how much pressure that is from a friend to make you decide that? You shouldnt have to brake up with your boyfriend because you have to make a decision. Tell your friends either they take you or leave you, because this whole thing is immature. As for your boyfriend flirting, guys flirt, if you can trust your boyfriend, then thats all that matters. Deffinitly talk to your friends. Good Luck, hope I helped!

-Brina

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My friend dosnt like my boyfriend, they get along sometimes but she always calls him names (like tells him hes gay and talks about his down there size when she dosnt even know) One time he almost broke up with me because he couldnt take her picking on him anymore. I have told her to stop but she just keeps doing it. I dont know what to do if asking her to stop isnt enough.

Hmm.Well, at first when my best friend got a boyfriend, I was really mad about it because I was like, oh my goodness i'm going to loose my best friend. But, now I dont really care anymore, because I know she'll always be my best friend. I think that your friend is going through that too. You need to ask her why she doesnt like her boyfriend. Obviously, you wouldn't want to break up with your boyfriend because of your friend, and you wouldnt want to stop being friedns with your friend because of your boyfriend. So, you really need to sit your friend down and tell her why she needs to stop. And, have your boyfriend tell her that it hurts his feelings. The worse thing that can happen, is you stop being friends with her, not because of your boyfriend, but because she's being an immature asshole. Don't let her hang out with you if she continues to do this. Tell her that once she stops this, you two can hang out and stuff. Good Luck, hope I helped.

-Brina

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OK so like my boyfriend is like absolutley in love with me but i am starting to lose intrest in him. The sad thing is that people are like you guys are the cutest couple i've ever seen. I reall miss being single, and i don't have a good reason to break up with him. i still want to be friends and stuff but i don't want him to hate me!!! He is also very clingy and its annoying, I'm 14 and so is he sp yeah i REALLLY need advice right now and i'll rate high!

Yes, you have a reason to brake up with him. You have the right to too. Theirs no such thing to break up with someone because of not a good reason. If you don't feel a connection to someone, you have every right not to stay with them. Your 14, be single, theirs other guys out there. Just tell your boyfriend you want to be friends, nothing more. If he hates you, thats his fault, not yours. Good Luck, hope I helped.

-Brina

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Hi. If it helps, I'm 15/f. Ok, I'm not going to beat around the bush, I think I might be gay or bi. Lately, I have found myself wanting to be with a girl more than with a guy. Today, I was at the waterpark with a friend, and I checked out almost every pretty girl I saw. Now, honestly, I don't know if it is because I might be gay, or because I find myself wanting to be a lot like them. I'm not the prettiest girl ever, and I'm not celebrity skinny. I do have some meat on my bones, but I'm not huge. Also, there is this girl at my school who just graduated. We were friends, and she was also gay. We played softball together for 2 years. I found myself wanting to be with her more and more everyday. I have had this 'crush' on her for as long as we have known each other. First, it started out with her looks, but I as I got to know her, it became stronger. I haven't had a real 'crush' on a guy since then. I don't really find any boys that attractive any more, but I find myself checking out girls more and more often. Could someone please help me, and with the information I have given, tell me what you might think it is?

You could most likely be lesbian. Girls, check out other girls, to compare each other usually, but like you said, its not just like that. You have, emotions and attraction to girls. Maybe you could contact that girl you have a crush on, and get her perspective on it, since she is lesbian, then, if she does think your lesbian, then maybe if you did want to have a relationship, she now knows. But, you might want to wait a little while, considering your 15, and its just the beginning of your outcoming. If you are lesbian, and plan to tell people you are, be prepared to be "shunned" by some people, because thats how people are. Good Luck, hope I helped!

-Brina

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ok so i have liked this guy for about a year now and the hard part is that he's a senior and im a freshman. he's graduating friday night and my friends were suposed to tell him i liked him but they didn't and i want him to know before he goes. he leaves saturday for a summer tour thing and then off to california for college for four years so the time is now to let him know. should i write him a letter and give it to him tomorrow night or is that to forward? guys opinions will help too thanks.

The other advicenator, definitly had a good point. I didn't read his whole thing, but let me give you my idea about this situation. So, you've deffinitly set your mind that your going to tell him, which is great. I think, that you should tell him in person. Because, if you tell him in person he'll think your brave for doing that. And by telling him in a letter, is a bit, er, immature. Not to be mean at all though. I dont think the age difference would be a big deal. Everyone thinks its so terrible to go out with an older person in school. But, its really not. So deffinitly go ahead with a plan. It wouldnt be too foward to tell him. Never regret any thing you do in life.

-Brina

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can exercising throw off your period?? i stopped playing basketball in december & then around march i juss ran & weightlifted so i was doing something. our practices started & we started playing basketball. 2 of the practices i started bleeding randomly & i'm a day off on my period, but i'm starting to get random pain in my armpits, bellybutton, leg, that feels like shooting pain kinda like before you get your period but it stopped. can exercising mess up your cycle??

Hey, yeah it actually does. Early in the softball season, that happened to me from exercising continuously. And no fears, your regular cycle will come back soon. Hope I helped!

-Brina

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My breasts hurt a little... mostly the right one. I'm not really sure why. My boyfriend was groping a bit last night but he wasn't doing it hard. I don't know... could it also be my bra? The one I was wearing today is a little bigger than what I usually wear.

You might be getting your period. Because, most girls, before their period their breasts hurt...for some reason that I cant remember...{sorry}. Most likely, the other advicenator is wrong about the pregnant thing, unless you've had sex, then you possibly could be...but woman's breats dont hurt when their pregnant...but, anyways, no it wouldnt be your bra if its bigger, now, if it was smaller, then that would be the case of your breasts hurting. Hope I helped.

-Brina

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13/f
I have a really big and annoying problem: I pretty much like every guy I come across. It's really annoying... all I do is stare at them. And it's not just guys from school! It's celebrities too. I'm so tired of it; I feel like I can't concentrate. I've had a boyfriend before, but I dumped him because he wasn't a good boyfriend. Does this have anything to do with it? What should I do?

Hm, it could have to do with your ex boyfriend. You might be looking at other guys to see which ones are nice etc. Like the other advicenator said, its just a phase also. When I was 13 I went through it also, except...not ever guy I came across. You should just wait it out, its not like your going to go out with any guy that you see, so its all good. Hope I helped! Good Luck hun.

-Brina

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I went to a party the other night for Ash's birthday, with a bunch of our friends. Her mom took us all to the movie, while she said she'd be shopping. After the movie was over, she didn't answer any of her phones and we couldn't get ahold of her for an hour. It was 11 at night, in a bad bad part of town, 7 young girls, all alone. When Ash finally did get ahold of her mom, her mom cussed at her, and told her it was all her fault. She was on speaker so we heard every foul word of it. Her mom blamed us being left there for an hour alone on Ash, even though the mom decided to see a movie longer then ours and did not tell us.

Ash cried in the car ride back to her house, and her mom kept cussing at her, and blamming her. She yelled at her the whole ride home saying she was the cause of everything wrong, and that she was never right, and said that all of us were much better kids then she'd ever be.

Her mom is so unfair to her, everything is Ash's fault, even when her grandma passed away, Ash's mom blamed it all on her. Ash is sucha sweet girl, I don't want her mom to be so bad to her. Is it okay for a mom to cuss at a child, abandon them, and baiscly verbally abuse them?
What should I do? Ash can't take this anymore.

Oh man, that is deffintly not good that her mom did that. In Ash's case, its good that her mom yelled at her in front of you girls, because now you all can try and help her. You probably know, that that isnt the first time her mom has said these things to her. A mom doesn't just burst out like that once. She's probably said those things to her before. Have Ash sleepover and let her know she needs to talk to someone about this before the situation becaomse worse. If she says she's scared to, you need to tell her she has the right to tell someone, no one should be treated like this. And don't be scared to, she might get upset, but all that matters is that she gets help, for her, and possibly even her mother. If that doesnt work, go to a guidence counselor at your school. Don't be afraid to. Let her know whats going on, and you cant help any further. The guidence counselor will be able to help out a lot. Hope I helped, best of luck to your friend.

-Brina

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