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Is giving out a fake number mean? What do I do?!
18/F I'm a greeter at Wal-Mart, so I interact with a loooot of different people on a daily basis. Well this one time later at night, this guy who looked to be about 30 and frankly, like a wannabe gangster pot-smoker, came in. I turned around when I heard the automatic door opening and kindly greeted him. He gave me a slight smile and walked past me, but he turned around and said, "You know, you have REALLY pretty eyes. Just thought I'd tell you that." Stunned, I said "Haha, thank you very much! Have a good night." and he walked away. He comes in about 2 or 3 times a week, and ever since he said that, I'd always smile at him when I walked past him, or greet him all friendly-like when he walked in. I just thought he was a nice guy, and I greeted him just like I greet the old people that come in. WELL, tonight I was returning some garlic bread back to where it belongs, when I saw him. So I smile and give a nod as I walk past. Well, I put the bread back, turn around and there he is. He says "Hey, do you have a number I could have so we could get to know each other?" I've never been asked for my number before, and he was so outright, I didn't know what to do. So I said, "Uuuummm... I don't know... How about YOU give me YOUR number?" So he asked if I had a pen and some paper, I said I didn't, but that we might have some up front. I start walking, and he follows me across the whole store to the front. I give him some paper, he rips it in half, writes his number down, and says "Give me your number too." I panicked. I've never dated anyone, let alone been asked out before. He seemed like the type that would call me a ton. SO, I wrote down my dad's old cell phone number which doesn't work anymore. He then asked me if I liked cage fighting. I said "Uh no, not really." and he goes "Well I'm fighting at the arena downtown next week, maybe you can watch one of my fights." and I said "Um, maybe!" then he asked what time I got out of work, to which I said I didn't know. I DEFINITELY didn't want him seeing the car I drive, or possibly have him following me home. He lives in the area, and comes in all the time, and what's worse is I'm a GREETER, so I'd HAVE to talk to him again. I thought about it, and I feel really bad... I probably shouldn't have done that, but I didn't know what else to do! I couldn't just flat out reject him, I see him all the time. After thinking about it, I feel terrible. So I tried to call the number so I could say something like, "Oh sorry, I accidentally gave you the wrong number! Things are complicated, and I'm really not looking for a relationship right now..." or something like that, but his writing's REALLY messy, I can hardly read the numbers they're so squished together, and when I attempted, I got some lady's voice mail. I really wasn't trying to be mean at all. I don't know what to do, or if what I did is right or not... Please help me! Thank you for your time.
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Want to answer more questions in the Relationships category?
Maybe give some free advice about: Work/School Relationships?
Talk to him again and give him the right number, then say you lost his and ask for it again.
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You did the right thing giving him a fake number. I've done that before. Does not bother my conscience one bit. If you're getting a bad vibe about the guy then it's probably not going to be a good relationship for you. I always tell women to listen to their gut instinct.
You should definitely tell your superior about this situation, though, just in case. If he really gets pushy, your manager could have him banned from the store.
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Don't feel bad...I do it all the time, guys are hopeful and they just think you just gave them the wrong number by accident, and laugh behind their backs...if you wanna fix it just say...OHHH THAT WAS MY OLLLD PHONE NUMBER.
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I don't think what you did was wrong. Giving a disconnected cell phone number to someone you don't want to talk to is a good thing. You honestly shouldn't feel bad about this whole situation. You did nothing wrong. You were doing your job so you were obligated to talk to him. It does suck that you have to see him everytime he walks into the store but just keep being nice to him. If he gets any more creepy I would tell somebody so they can watch out for him.
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Fake Number,
Thank you for the quirky story and I can assure you that you are not alone. As a front line associate, this was bound to happen, and depending on your tenure as a greeter it is surprising that this has happened before and yet you were caught off guard and "panicked".
First off, it is good that you actually care about what transpired. This instinct alone should have answered your question of "I don't know what to do, or if what I did is right or not"?
Confrontation is something that people deal with on a daily basis, and everyone's level of comfort also varies. Personally, I feel the action you took was not correct and was not very professional. My reasons are: This customer is a repeat customer that you see on a regular basis and he may actually approach you as ask why you gave him the wrong number or he may revisit his original request and ask for your number again. If he shrugs off that you gave him the wrong number, you either have to get creative and lie or tell the truth. The situation you put yourself can also have professional repercussions given he feels insulted.
On a personal note, there is nothing wrong with telling a customer that you are working and the conversation does go against your corporate code of conduct. This sounds ridiculous; however, you are protecting yourself and your business.
Honestly, a business is invested in the welfare and security of their employees, and you should speak with your management if something arises, because there is no way to gauge what kind of person this man is, and your personal security should come first.
I hope this helps.
-CLE247
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Hahahha. omg. this made me laugh. i'm a front end associate at walmart too. and i've had guys ask for my number. and you had a right to be cautious, you don't know him like that and you never know what some random guy is capable of especially when you don't even know his name. so DON'T feel terrible. But with that said that is why Walmart doesn't approve of that anyway. You shouldn't be giving out your number to customers whether it's yours or not in the first place and yes you can get in trouble for that because you are being paid to work not to get your "mack-on". but with that said you now have a good excuse for when the guy comes back.
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Remember that you are just working and have no obligation to do anything besides greet him. If/when you see him again, just greet him as usual. If he asks why the number doesn't work, asks for your number again, or tries to ask you out, just be honest with him. Something like "I'm sorry, but I don't think that's a good idea." You can make an excuse if need be- that you're too busy or have a boyfriend or something. But really, you don't owe him an explanation.
I work in retail as well (bagger at a grocery store) and I can tell you that older guys will try to do that kinda thing pretty often. They would never approach someone your age in a regular social setting- they are just taking advantage of the fact that you are working and have to be polite to them. Next time, a simple 'no thank you' will do, and if they are persistent, it's ok to ask them to leave you alone. Being too nice can be a bad thing sometimes.
-Krista, 21/f
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