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I want a kid.... but I dont know if I should...
Right. This could be a bit long.
For the last few days/weeks, I have been thinking about having a baby. Me and my boyfriend are very happy and it definatly looks like we will be together for a long time. He has mentioned before bout kids and stuff. but I always said to him that I would but not yet. I am only 17 years old and I have got a 2 year course at collage coming up. also i dont know if he would actually want a kid yet.
but I have been thinking and I would really love to have a kid.
Can someone please help me change my mind because I know I'm to young to have a kid and I probly wouldn't be able to cope. Even though I'm pretty sure my mum would help me out if I did have a child.
Please help me change my mind because I really want a kid but I am only 17.
Any advise would be brilliant.
Thanks
xXxXxXx
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Your child deserves the best, right? Well, the best isn't having a mother and father who are still too young to even drink and aren't married. The best isn't needing your mother to help support you. You need to finish school (college too) and get a respectable and financially stable career. You need to make sure that you aren't missing out on life first. You may think this is what you want, but believe me when you are in your 20's and everyone around you is living it up and you can't leave the house, you'll regret it. Chances are very slim that you and your boyfriend will last forever, and I hate to say it (I know it's cliche) but it's hard to find love as a single parent. Most people would rather not get involved in all that. It's a romantic notion at your age but honey, the novelty wears off very very quickly.
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Well, if you want a kid real badly, I'm sure you can wait another 2 years. I know it seems like a long time, but if you still want a child with your boyfriend at the end, then have one. Just make sure you finish school first and everything, because my mother didn't go to college and she has me and my brother to take care of, and she's working two jobs because one doesn't pay enough because of course nowadays it's hard getting a good job without a college education. And 17 is young in my opinion. Your age is around the time where you should be out experiencing things, living life, and enjoying yourself whenever you DO have children, you might not have the time to be able to do those things. So wait. I hope I helped.
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You have the rest of your life for a kid! Dont you want to be free of that responsability untill you are married and 100% sure both you and this man want a baby? I mean just because you think you will be together with this guy for a long time, doesn't mean you will. You are only 17, things change very fast. You aren't even graduated from high school yet! All I'm saying is, you gotta live before you have a kid. Do your own thing.
You need a good paying job, and a husband to support you when you have a baby. It is extremely expensive, you gotta pay for food, diapers, child care, baby clothes, medical care. Think of everything that will happen!!!
You also need to think of the baby, will you be able to give it a good life? A good home? Be a good mother? If you cant give that baby the best life possible then you are not read for this baby. And what if you and your boyfriend break up? You will be on your own and the baby will not have a father to look up to.
You will also not be able to attented the rest of highschool or college if you have a baby. It is NOT possible at all to do this. You must believe me.
Also do you really think your parents will be supportive of you having a baby at 17? They will only support you because you probably will not be able to support yourself.
I hope I helped change your mind because you are right you are way to young, and not ready at all.
I hope you make the right decision xoxo
marsbars
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hey, well i dont its your age that matters. i think its because your going to a 2 year college program and you probably wont be able to take care of your kid. i think you should wait until your done with college then have your kid. liked my advice? add me as a favorite columnist!
-caitt♥
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Nobody else can change your mind babe. You already KNOW having a kid at seventeen is majorly daft idea. Not only daft, but exceedingly selfish. You know you wouldn’t be able to provide as well for the baby as you would be able to in several years AND you expect your mother will help you shoulder the burden of your poor decision. Maybe she would, but it's still selfish.
I don't think you'd be asking this question if you actually thought it was a good idea. So I'm not going to sit here and type out all the reasons you shouldn't have a baby, you already know them.
Own yourself, and take responsibility for your own thoughts. Your body might be crying out for a baby, but your brain knows way better. So, stop sitting around and pouting about the fact you shouldn't have a baby, you might as well sit about and pout over the fact you can't become a llama. It serves no purpose but to upset you and you are the only one who can make it stop.
Talking to your boyfriend might help knock some sense into you, I'd suggest doing it. It's great for two people in a serious relationship to know what the other wants from life in the long term. It's great to be connected in your hopes and aspirations. You can level each other, keep each other focused on the now, so you can achieve your goals together, later, when it isn't stupid.
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Finish you schooling first and make sure your relationship will last. Kids will come but right now is not the time. Wait until you are married or at least in a very long term committed relationship.
Mom may help you out but that isn't fair to her.
I had my first around your age. Your life pretty
much becomes totally focused on raising the baby. No time for fun. Friends who initially
support you will soon grow bored with your being
busy with the baby and will move on.
The cost of raising a child, being on your own etc. are astronomical. So many things you don't now think about.
Housing, electricity, gas, food, clothing, baby formula, diapers, medical care, Home furnishings,
car, car insurance, tags for the car, personal property taxes on the car, Tires and car maintenance, if you work you need childcare. If you have a minimum wage job, paying for that is
outrageous and takes all your money. The list is
never ending!
So you should at least have a good paying job. A partner with a good paying job and a good stable relationship. If you don't have, a baby will end it real quick. :)
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Ok I don't mean to be mean but you ae only 17 and want to go to collage, so if you have a kid how will pay for school? What happens if you and your boyfriend break up. My friend and her boyfriend wanted a kid and when she told him she was pregrant he left her. If you want to have a kid go for it and i wish you the best....but If i was you I would really think about it...and talk about it with your boyfriend before you have a kid. hoped I help.
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Bad idea. Dont have a kid at this age. Your not even an adult yet, technically your still a kid.
Some reasons why you shouldnt.
If you plan on going to a two year course at collage then you will probably have to put those plans on hold if you have a newborn to take care of.
You and your boyfriend arnt married. Not saying he would but he could leave you at any moment and then your stuck with no father and thats not fair to your child and it will be hard as hell for you to take care of the child.
Just make the right decision, I know you already know since you posted this question on here. In the back of your mind, you know your not ready.
Believe me, its a lot harder than you think.
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First you're not married. What are you thinking! A kid with no father? Kids are to only be made when you're married. Not when you're going out.
And you're only 17 and you have a birght future ahead of you. A baby will ruin all your dreams. Finish college, get a job, get married, then after you're over 22 get make a baby. I won't say anything when you do then. But right now you're just way to young to be throwing away the rest of your life for a kid that will keep you up all night.
It costs more than $800 to raise a baby in a good home PER YEAR. It's hard to support a kid with only high school education. You need to attend 4years of college and/or more. Many jobs won't hire you if they found out that you only had 2 yrs of collegge (with not so good grades) and a kid.
You're bringing in a living, breathing, thinking, human being into this worl when you yourself haven't experienced it. You're life is just beginning and if you have a child, your life ends right then and there.
Do NOT have a kid. PLEASE DONT. Many children whose mother's had them when they were teenagers have a greater risk of going bad with bad grades, drinking, smoking, drugs, etc. because their mother isn't able to support and give them the full attnetion a mother needs to give them.
You'll regret this very day adn there is NOTHING you can do to take it back.
Spare yourself and don't have a baby.
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