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Family over a guy or what?
k i like this guy lets call him D and he is black i am white and my parents are totaly against that! i havent told them yt but i really like D so i am confussed about what to do!!! i think he likes me too but its kinda iffy!!! i wanna date him but i dont want to be disowned by my family. and i know they will disowen me because the had told me before if i had ever dated one then they would ! so what should i do!!!
Thanks!
P.S. for really stupid answers i will give ones!!
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sometimes you just follow your own heart.
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If I were in your shoes I would kind of like date him in secret until things get serious then tell your parents. I think it's so wrong how they are racist like that. So are my parents. I went out with a mixed guy once and it had to be a secret.. I dunno..
I hoped I helped somehow..
Allieboo <3
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i have been in your shoes plenty of times--and to tell you the truth i love my family but i did it anyways--not saying it was right. depending on your age that does make a difference. if you are 18 then you have the right to make your own decisions--but sit down and talk to them and let them know you understand that they are against it but that is not your style.tell them he is really nice guy and you would like for them to meet him--if they are still against it let them know you love them and either they will be by your side or not--and if they turn you away b/c of it and see your happy then maybe they will rethink--its really your call i dont know your parents or your age or the situation involved but if you dont think this is the "one" for you would you jeopadize your family's love for a short term relationship? good luck
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well at first you should try and sit down with your family and talk to them. tell them you have feelings for "D" and he has them for you and you dont want to hurt them but you want to be with him. if that doesnt work introduce your family to him and let them get to kno each other. im not talking "meet the parents" but more of a "dinner with the family". i kno "D" will be kind of unsure about doing that but assure him it will all be worth it in the end. well hope my advice helped. good luck! sincerely- kitkatkate
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ok ive gone through the same thing as you, if you like this person the way you say you do, then i would just go for it your parents can only do so much and who knows they may start to except your decision.
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my parents do that to me to...cause im asian and they dont want to date black or white guys and theyre totally against that.
so my advice for you is that you should just go out with him without your parents knwing and if you dont wanna do that then let him go.
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heyyyyy girl this is lady D
i think that thats rally messed up what your parents said. you should really think if you rally like this boy. if you do go after him and yust tell your parents he's just a friend. you will have to keep it on the DL (down low).
HOLLA! THAT'S WHAT LADY D WOULD DO
PS.don't forget to give me feedback
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i think that you should make sure that "D" likes you back and stuff before you start a big thing with your parents... and if he does, then just remeber that your parents are the ones that are wrong, the color of your skin doesn't determine at all the kind of person that you are, and make sure you point out a lot of his good qualities to them, if they still disagree with you, then you have to deside whether being with "D" is worth being disowned by your family. good luck!
<3 katie
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You should talk to your parents. ask them if it's okay if you guys hang out. you should get to know this guy like your brother before you decide if you like him. hang out with him and become really great friends before you choose. remember to consult your parents first. ~*~*Lynne*~*~
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wow...harsh...ok well you are really ging to hate this answer but...its what i think...ok: i think you should talk to your parents about it again. if they still stand strong on their opinion, talk to 'D' and tell him about it. from there if you choose to date him, keep t a secret and dont tel your parents...say you guys are really good friends...hope i helped...
ANK
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Your parents are in the wrong, and although you may not want to tell them that, perhaps show them that they're wrong. Show them what a great guy D is regardless of his color, maybe have him over. If he is a bad kind of guy however, then maybe you should date him anyways? All I'm saying really is that your parents are wrong to not like him simply because he is black, show them that and they should have no choice but to back off and trust your judgement. Hope I helped. Keep me posted!
-Angel
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omg i think i know who u r talking about do u go to ralston?
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This is so "MArTiN lUtHEr kIng tIme" cant we all jsut live in peace..seriouslu..my grandmother said they same thing to me. Just because theyre skin is a different shade means not one bit. I come to find out that my grandmother was just saying that to make me believe she would disown me. When i dated one she was mad but she got over it. Just explain to ur parents its your life and your choice. If you made the wrong decision then you made the wrong decesion dont let anyone make you mad like that..they just dont want you to get hurt. Seriously many blacks are the nicest funniest people you can meet, i have nothing against them. THat would be like saying that you can have sprite but not coke..just because one is a lighter shade doesnt mean its any different...theyre both drinks just like black and whites are both humans.
HOpE i hELped..go0d Luck..
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I think what you should do is get to be good friends with "D" first. Let your parents get to know him by doing things with him and a group of friends. You may not be able to change your parents opinions about blacks as a whole, but you can change their opinion about one particular person. "He's different from the others" is what they will say and believe. The more and more blacks they get to know perhaps they'll lose their racist opinions altogether. Make sure "D" knows how your parents feel and DO NOT start officially dating behind your parent's backs. I'm not saying you can't have a close or intimate relationship with him, but don't make it look like, or tell anyone that you are dating him. The disowning bit was probably just scare tactics, but if you lie to your parents they really might do it. It's a tricky situation, but the bottom line is, give your parents a chance, but don't let their racist opinions affect your own life. Good luck!
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Well that's hard there are a few things you can do..
1) depending on how old you are you could just leave it cause if your 14 or around 14 then it's possible it's just a little crush that'd you'll get over but if you older like 19ish then it might be a little crush or not you never know but who do you love more?
2) Sit you parents down and talk to them maybe they'd changed their minds or say "mom, how would you feel if dad was black and your parents said you couldn't go out with him because of his color. Dad most likly is your 1st and only ture love and your parents would have said no to you daing him cause of his color?"
3) Just tell them how you feel seriously
4) Keep your dating him a secret
Sorry but that's all the advice i can think of now and i hope your situation turns out for the best! Good Luck!
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i honestly would go for the guy. when i like someone, i dont care what others think..your family is racist and thats wrong..you and "D' can go out..share romance..without your family knowing. it will be a little tricky, but doable.try it out..inbox me with a question if you have any more :)
-meliss
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