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HELP
Ok. I'm 14 and I resently had sex with a guy I had never met before. He was around 21. I have rented a book over being pregnant and I have all the symptoms. I took the pregnancy test and sure enough I am. Well anyways I don't know who he is and i'm really scared. I don't know how to tell my parents and I want him to be there when I tell them! Well if you can help me or give me ideas to tell them and find him...Please HELP!!!
I rate 5's on every one
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just sit down with your parents and tell them the truth. it's something that you should have thought of before. but as to find him i don't know. maybe if you know what he looks like and the people he hangs out with you might have a good chance
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ok well find the guy, and tell them, they can help you and well you will need that, remember to eat right, even if that means you look more pregnant! dont try to hide it and not have they baby grow right, and dont have an abortion it is murder.
-alex
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um...well you shouldn't have done it to begin with but hey the past is the past. If you have his fone number you should defently call him and tell him the "news". For your parents...have they warned you many times? If they did well that ain't good but you defently tell them ASAP because the longer you wait the worse the outcome. And a good idea is if you don't already work get a job at a store like wallgreens, osco drug or a grocery store because you will get a discount on diapers and that will show your parents that you are trying to make the best of it and that you are trying your hardest. Or think abut adoption.
hope you make it through it
~blackstar~
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Well, you're going to have to come out with the truth sometime soon ! I doubt that you're parents will accept the fact that you're only 14 and having sex with a 21 year old or however old he was .. and if you do tell ur parents & they find out who he is they can charge him for satitory rape or however the hell its spelled .. maybe you should just go to your local clinic or something .. get on birthcontrol , get some condoms , spermicidal or the day after pill or if you are 100% are preg0 then maybe you should get an abortion if its that bad ! hope i helped .. goodluck<3
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well sweetie.. it looks to me that you have a problem. Just tell your parents what you told us. They might yell .. but its okay because in the end they will be there for.. instead of not telling them and being alone in this. I know your really scared. Im 15 and im pregnant, im scared too. As for the father of baby.. I dont want to sound rude but he might not be there for you. There are plenty of single mothers out there as we speak.. I think you and the baby would be better off without the father. Hes 21 years old.. and he probably sleeps around for fun.. most guys do. But you dont want to get mixed up in that sorta thing.. it would be to much stress on you and the baby.
<3 Katelyn
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well first of all find out who the guy is. drop some more info. into my question box like how did you even meet him did he rape you? ok just go ahead and tell your parents because now you have a huge responsablity and hate to freak you out but this guy will go to jail.
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Having a man who is basically a stranger to you help you tell your parents you are pregnant might not be the best idea. First of all, there's no guarantee this man has any interest in your other than sex. He might run 100 miles per hour in the opposite direction when you tell him.
Next, if he is 21 and you are 14, than that's legally rape.
I understand that you are terrified about telling your parents, but having the guy there won't necessarily make it any easier. In fact, it might make it a whole lot worse.
You'll need to tell them as soon as possible. If you choose to keep the baby, you'll need to start attending doctor's appointments. If you want an abortion, the sooner you have one the better it is for your body. If you want to offer the baby up for adoption, that will require a lot of parental support.
If you don't tell them, your body eventually will. Better to just get it out of the way, as some researchers have suggested that the feelings of anxiety or extreme stress can have an impact on a developing baby.
You can talk to your parents face-to-face, or perhaps choose only to talk first with the one you are closet to. You can also write them a letter.
If you feel you need a helping hand, do you have an aunt or another older woman you feel close to?
I wish you the best.
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Hey hunny,
Wow, sweetie this must be so hard for you. Having a baby is a very serious matter. You know that he could get charged with rape. I'm totally against abortions, but if you know that you cannot take care of the baby, then you should really either have an abortion or give it up for adoption. You really need to tell this guy. Talk to him and see what he says. After that, you need to figure out what you want to do. If you want to have the baby, you need to tell your parents. Don't be scared. They love you no matter what, and will always be there for you. Now, if you don't want to have this baby and don't want your mom and dad to ever find out, you should look up planned parenthood in the phonebook. It's a clinic that will do all of that stuff hopefully for free since you are young. They handle all of the stuff and they don't tell your parents. Then, they would also give you birth control if you wanted to be put on it. It would be of course free, without your mom and dad knowing. I'm sorry hunny but that's the only info I could give to you. I really hope everything works out for you and the baby. x3
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Wow. This is the most serious question I have ever answered. I don;t really know how to answer it but I'll give it a try.
How did you meet the guy you had sex with? Was it through a friend? Did you meet at a party? HOPEFULLY you know the name of the guy. Maybe ask some of you're friends who met him (if any did) if they know his full name so that you can take him to court. If you can get a DNA test to prove the baby is his, the state might make him pay child support so that you don't have to support this child on your own.
GO TO A DOCTOR! Make SURE that the pregnancy test was 100% accurate because some of those home testing kits can come out wrong.
Tell your parents!!! They are PROBIBALLY going to be mad at you. Not saying they will, but I know that if I told my parents, they would definately be mad. Tell them what is going on and make sure you tell them when they are not doing anything. Look them straight in the eyes and just tell them. They like it when you are honest and just tell them straight without stalling.
Think about wether you are going to be able to take care of your child once you have it. Having a child at 14 is a HUGE responsibility. Will you be able to provide it with all of the necesities? Food? Water? Clothes? Shelter? If not, you might want to give your child up for adoption or, if worse comes to worse, have an abortion. Are you working? If not, I recommend getting a job to provide the money. Maybe your parents can help.
I hope I helped. Good Luck!!!
<3 Kate Brzozowski
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I agree 100% with protossc541.
Having sex with him was illegal. You can't get into any trouble, but he could be charged with statutory rape, which is a crime that will get him listed on-line as a sex offender and punishable by 50 years jail time. Chances are, even if you find this guy he'll deny it and say the baby isn't his. Spare yourself the heartache. This is going to hurt enough as it is.
You really have to tell your parents. I know this is a horrible, scary thing. I know you must be scared to death right now. I understand--I had a scare like this once, which luckly was only a scare and I was so freaked out. But trust me. Once you get it out and tell your parents and own up to what you did, you'll be able to move on with your life.
I don't know what your personal beliefs on the subject are, but you probably shouldn't keep the child. 50% of teen mothers end up on welfare. You'll have a much better life if you can either find a family to raise the child for you or, if you're pro-choice, abort the baby. But you need to understand your options. www.plannedparenthood.com is a great site to answer the question "I'm pregnant...now what?"
I wish you the best of luck. You just need to take care of this problem and own up to it. You messed up. It does not mean you're a horrible person. It does not mean you're less than anyone else or a bad child. It means you made a mistake and now, like every other human, you have to deal with the consequences. Maybe you could have a good female friend go with you to tell your parents. Maybe you could write them a letter. Regardless, you have to tell them. They can't legally kick you out of the house. It will be okay.
Take care of yourself and the baby. Remember that smoking anything or drinking and even some pain medication can seriously damage a fetus. Also, DO NOT try a home abortion by drinking an "abortive substance." They can KILL you.
It WILL be okay.
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Some questions for you- Did you use a condomn? Are you sure you used the pregnancy test correctly? Why did you have sex with a guy you dont no? Did he rape you? Where you drunk or under the influence?
Please respond to these questions.
Also my advice would be to seriously sit down and have a talk with your parents. Tell them whats going on. Like someone else said I DO NOT recommend you getting an abortion (I consider it a form of murder) your old enough to no what sex is and what happens when you do it. If you give the name of the area your in I could help you find a place you can go for help. If you dont feel comfortable with that then you might want to just talk to your parents about that. Please if you give your area DONT give your full adress I dont need to know all that. Hope I helped, if you have any further questions then plz contact me. my yahoo address is Mrs_nautica_advicenator where you can chat with me live.
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If you find out who he is...he most likely will deny it...considering he is seven years older than you and a pedophile. You need to just sit your parents down and get it out...you don't want them to start asking you questions about it when your belly starts to swell. Goodluck.
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well before you tell your parents.. i reccomend you take a pregency test first... even an at home one is fine.. but you can't take it right away.. The most accurate way to test for pregnancy is to wait until after your period is due. All pregnancy tests on the market will pick show a positive result, a higher percentage of the time, if you wait until this point. bUt, to be honest i had a pregnency scare a couple of months ago... and i over analyzed the symptoms and told myself i had them... just because i thought i was pregnent.. did you use a condom?! did the condom break? do you have a reason to think your pegnent? or do you just think you might be pregnent cause you had sex? so take a test 1st... and honestly... i dont know if your parents would like him to be there...he's 7 years older then u... totally illegal.. and if your dad is over protective like mine... he might be pretty pissed at the guy who got his little girl pregnent.. i dont know if this was the answer u were looking for... but i was just giving u what i would do! take a test! i hope your not pregnent! and be safe in the future!
xOxO, aLeX
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hey
sorry to hear about this.
im going to be kind, every 1 will end up telling you how irrisponsible this was.
but hey, you know this right?
any how...
go to the docs to be 100000000000% sure your ACTUALLY pregnant, there might of been a mistake, highly unlikely but possible.
then you can start to think about the consequences:
- are you 100% you want this kid, 14 with a baby is a HUGE responsibilty.
- would your parents support you no matter what?
any way...
do you know his name? where did you meet? you might be able to track him down from where you meet him. do any of your friends know him? was he a friend of a friend?
maybe when the baby is born you can get a DNA test to see who the father is?
hope i helped xxxx
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Wow, because this guy is 21 and the fact that you dont have his number, address or anything is going to be hard. Maybe you can ask your friends or ask anyone who was around you at the time you met this guy how you could contact him. Please be preprared for the worst-he might deny that the baby is his and not talk to you at all. Actually you should tell your parents first so they could help you find him. Good luck and remember, ask people that know who he is if they know how to reach him. Update me if you can! =)
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