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My mother has been getting on my nerves since i was 7 years old. She judges me, yells at me, swears at me, makes fun of me, and flat out makes me sick. I even started to cut myself because of her, but i eventually stopped after 1 year because my friends helped me out. But i cannot take it anymore. My dad & I are bestfriends, i tell him everything, but i dont tell him about my mother. Just because i dont want them to split up or anything. What can i do to make my mom shutup? Plus, i have many brothers, she loves them, talks to them, hugs them, and compliments them. Its just plain sick. Im sick of her act shes pulling agaisnt her ONLY DAUGHTER. Sometimes i do NOTHING and she says, oh god i wish i had another son. I havent told anyone about this, but all my friends know how she is, and i have always hated her. I see all my close friends spending time with thier moms and having close relationships. I run to my friends house to get away sometimes or just sit outside. Even this past mother's day i bought her a card & flowers, she threw the flowers away. What should i do?
Sincerely, Tired Of This. 13/F
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well the first thing is cutting yourself is not the answer its just flat out wrong. I think you need to talk to someone about it. I think maybe your dad could help you with your prob. If its as bad as you say it is he prob. picked it up to. Maybe next time she does something he could stick up for you and be like well i think you should go esier she really didnt do anything. You could also talk to your friends and maybe even your mom
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I think you need to have a long talk with your dad. I sincerely doubt that it will cause them to break up. If it does then it was headed that way anyway. Your mom should be someone you can go to. Maybe dad can help you fix it. It will take some effort on your part too, and forgiveness. :)
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i think you should definantly tell your dad, he'll help you get through this.. other than that.. i feel for you my mother is dandy either.. = but its ok.. if you EVER need to talk i'm here for you ; brunette x5o is my aim sn .. <3
=) samantha
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Dear Tired,
I don't blame you and my mother was the same way when I was young. She doted on my older sister, and my younger brother, but always found fault with me. I didn't do anything about it, I didn't know that I could. I can say now that she knows better than to talk to me like that now, because I am the only child who gives her any attention at all, (not that I like it, because I don't) The other two could care less, or come around with their hands out for $$$$. I also noticed that she did not say things bad to me in front of my dad. She would have been embarassed for him to know that she spoke to me that way. He had much more respect for me and people in general. She once told me that she wished she had had an abortion instead of me. (and abortions weren't even legal when she was young) and I was so made I didn't speak to her for months, then she sends me a birthday check....I tore it up and sent it back to her. She called me and begged me to accept a check and cash it, because ( I realized) that my father would see that I hadn't cashed the check and would ask her why. And she sort of apologized for her statement to me about the abortion. Here is a suggestion. I do think you have the upper hand in that she does not want Dad to know. I suggest that 1.) either you threaten her that you will tell your dad the way she talks to you. And if that doesn't work. Why not tell your dad the way she talks to you, but don't start off with the worse. Start with some of the bad but not awful things that she says. He will question her about it, and she may realize that she can't continue to say what ever she wants because you will tell. And she'll make some lame excuse but will stop calling you names and treating you so badly. If she doesn't stop, then tell him the worse. He needs to know what kind of person he is married to.
I know for you that is sucks. I have never resolved the problems between my mother and I. I hate her, and only see her because she is very old and doesn't drive. I take her shopping each week to just show human kindness. Respect for her position, but not for her. I hate being with her. And she does not remember my childhood the way I remember it. So what good would it do to try and get an apology out of her now.
I do love myself and have learned that I don't need her approval to survive or tolove myself. I only wish that I had learned it so many years earlier. I wish you lots of luck. Hang in there. She is a jerk and doesn't deserve a nice kid like you. I am sorry that you cut yourself. If they did that when I was young I probably would have tried it. As it is, I grew up OK, and I have two teenage boys, and they are OK, because I would NEVER talk to them the way my mother talked to me. Try to remember that when you have kids, because my first reaction as a mother, was to act just like my mother. It took a lot of work to learn how to be a loving mother because I never had one. Good luck to you dear.
Michele
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Well im really sorry to hear about this. My greatgrandma is the same way,sort of. Some people just prefer boys to girls and i have no clue why. But you really need to talk about it to someone. First tell your dad. Then you 3 should talk about it. Get emotional. She may not seem it, but she is your mother and she loves you no matter what. She probably doesnt understand girls as well as boys and things they are very complicated (cuz you know, we are). You really need to get things settled about this. I dont think your parents would seperate about something like this, but maybe you guys could go to family counseling center? I know it seems humiliating and your probably think WTF im not going there and you probably tihnk im psychoctic... but its really for the best. Well i hope i could help, let me know how things go, okay? Sammerz
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oh my goodness. okay. well you def need to talk to someone! if you cant talk to your mom, maybe a councelor? or your dad? i dont think you should hide this from your dad, even if they do split or whatever. gosh, i feel really bad for you, cos i know that must suck. you need to talk to your mom too, as hard as it may be, you need to have a "calm" talk with her. tell her how you feel. if that doesnt work, then i dont know what you can do. good luck hun!
♥ nicole
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-Dear Tired of This-
In my opinion, you should talk to your dad about it. I'm not saying it's a good thing that they may split up. But you should talk to him and just tell him that you feel disrespected by your mom. Or you can do what I do when my mom and I aren't getting along too well. Sit down with her, just you and her, and talk to her about your problem. I got great advice from my uncle one day when I was mad at my mom. He said "When you are mad at someone, sit them down and talk to them about it. That way they know what they know what they are doing makes you mad or upset, that way they know not to do it anymore." I have lived by his advice since he said that to me.
I hope this helped!
X_Amanda_X
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i think you should sit your mother down and have a LONG talk with her about how you feel and tell her you used to cut because of her and be honest with her.
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tell her if she doesnt stfu n leave uu alone ull have 1a yur guy friends give u a blk eye n then ull call child services n say it was her lo0l that should make her piss her self :DDD
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wow. just wow. i think your mom has some issues from the past that make her (well i think) a bit jealous of you. moms that judge their daughters tend to have problems with themselves so they put them down to make themselves feel powerful or better. i think you should talk to your dad about this...i did when my mom had a case similar to this. he told her to cool her jets cuz i was his daughter too. well just stay away if you can to avoid conflict and run away anytime you feel the need. hope this helps && leave me one if you need anything else! <3
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You should never hate her but you can dislike her....tell your mom how u fell and that it bothers you with the things she says or does....talking to your mom is the best thing you can do right now and i know how u feel kinda my mom is always yellin and swearing and bitching about everything but i think my moms going through menapause maybe yours is too
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i have the same problem. What i do is usually run away for a hour or so and then i come back...and see if my mom is still tempered. But you should sit your mom down and tell her and if she refuses to listen to you, tell your dad. Maybe he'd be able to help you. Even if your parents DO split up and they have to move away from each other, maybe you'd get the choice to move with your dad. :- Well hope i helped and i hope everything goes ok. Good Luck!!
if you need anything, leave one in my inbox and i will reply ASAP.
♥Julie♥
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Well, My advice is to talk to your mom. If she really cares about you, she will listen. Tell her "Mom, sometimes you can be a little mean to me, and I don't know if you realize it." If that doesn't work, you need to talk to your dad! He's an adult and he might be able to handle these problems with your mom better. If your mom hurts you, make sure you tell your dad or a counseler! P.S> Don't cut. It solves nothing.
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