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self esteem
i have tried all kinds of ways to get my self esteem up. but i just cant figure it out. i like myself a little bit more then i used to but not much. i want to love myself so that people can see the confidence in me because they like that. but i dont know how to raise my self esteem. any ideas, advice, whatever? lol
~♥~ Carrie ~♥~
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Maybe give some free advice about: Mental health?
the most important thing is two love your self cuz if you dont love your self youll never get any were in life and just try and do something like find out if u have any talints or something maby youll find out something speshal you never new you could do.sorry if it doseint work out
*~stacey~*
(AKA.hottopichottie)
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Tell yourself, no matter what, that you are the most goregous girl in the room. And act like it too ♥
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To raise your self-esteem you must try to stop insulting yourself out loud. Try to accept compliments and really trust the person who gave them. see them as a mirror when they are kind to you because you deserve it.
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always remember that nothing else anyone else thinks about you or says about you matters. because it truly doesnt. and always know that you look beautiful even if you dont think so. i bet you always find something wrong with your outfit or your hair. just think that, maybe your hair doesnt look as good as *hers* but it looks way better than :hers:. also people in the world who matter wont judge you on how you look, or how you act the second they meet you or see you. the type of person that matters will want and try to get to know you and figure you out without judging you till after this. i could really go on for too long about this, you need to be more specific on what your self esteem is low abuot or because of.
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You can rais your self esteem by trying out new activities, making more friends and just being yourself.
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This is going to sound weird, but I suggest it since it worked for me: Smile! You don't have to smile like your looney or retarded, but anytime you meet someone new or you're gonna be put in a new situation, smile and act cheeful. People will warm up to you very quickly!
Cheers!
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I know how you feel. I may still be insecure to a degree, but now I feel that I have come to a point in my life where I truly love myself. Here is what changed my outlook...
One day I realized that all people are equal. We are all special, unique, and imperfect. We become insecure only when we allow ourselves to expect perfection, or for others to expect us to be perfect.
I had to accept myself for who I all ready was, and not the person that I WANTED to be. Once I was able to love myself unconditionally, I realized that I had a lot of good qualities and a lot of flaws. But the funny thing about flaws is that, once you acknowledge and then accept them, you start to change. No one else may notice, but you will.
And when someone else critizes you, try to keep things in perspective. What they say may hold a seed of truth, but people tend to exaggerate when they critize because of their _own_ insecurities. Realize where their criticism comes from. (If it comes from a good place they'll find a nice way to say whatever they want to say. Believe me.) Then realize that that person has no reason to demand perfection of you, just as you have no right to demand perfection of them.
I hope I was of some help. Best wishes ;)
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i think you should try to go to the movies with some people and try to get to know them better!
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Just to kinda summarize, maybe add a couple things.
There are two ways to solve this. The first is to pretend and lie, and that's the easy way out. The second is to actually change, and that's much much harder, sometimes impossible without someone you really trust to get feedback from.
Lack of self-esteem is internal. It is partly related to the way you see yourself, but is almost always much more reliant on what you believe other people think of you. Yes, it doesn't matter what they actually think of you, just what you believe, and this makes low self-esteem a cycle that is very hard to break out of.
The first way is simple; just act like you're really cool, you don't really need anyone, you've never had a hesitant moment in your life, and you're always right unless someone disagrees and actually brings up evidence, at which point you pretend that what they're saying made you arrive at their viewpoint from a different path, which makes it totally your idea and your choice. Dress like you care, act like you don't, be brutally honest about what you see in other people and don't take shit. That throws away a lot of potential friends, since you tend to hurt the vulnerable and needy, but those who think in a similar fashion would now accept you.
The first thing is to consciously disagree with the way you feel about yourself. You need to find reasons that you're good, better than most people. This can be hard for some people; try to be honest, don't dismiss even the smallest things, because they can always grow over time. You don't have to think you're the best person ever, but you *do* have to think that you do something well, that you have some kind of real talent, and this'll be the major source of your confidence.
Next, you need to find reasons that other people would like you, and challenge the reasons you currently hold that they dislike you. This is where you need that friend, and you really need a friend who you trust, and have him swear on his own life that he's telling the truth, and then ask him to confirm or deny things. This outside perspective helps a lot, he/she can tell you what they like about you, what kinda throws them or other people off, they usually see a lot of things you'd never have thought of alone. I see this step as essential, because if you don't believe that the average person would like you if you went up and started talking to them, you can't really act confident. One naturally flows from the other.
If you complete the first two steps, then comes the third and hardest step. In order to actually believe, deep down, that the second step is true, you have to risk, you have to test. The only way I was able to do this is assume, from the first, that people who don't know me very well - ie, anyone I don't talk to - will inherently dislike me for whatever reason. Therefore, if I talked to them and they didn't like me, I lost nothing :x . You have to find your own way...and if you can't even force yourself to do it, use a friend as an intermediary...you just need to show yourself that random people *will* like you if they get to know you.
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uh yeh what i do is just try to hang out with people and let them get to know me and make them laugh and maybe you could set a movie date w/ some of your friends to go do some more things together so you could get yourself out there and let ppl notice you
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Look, You seem like a really nice girl. . .im sure that if you just act like your-self, people will realize that this is you and they can't change that! :) Happy to help!
*Katt*
Make sure that you look at my Advice Colum and leave me some Mail <3
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You have said there are things you like about yourself, when you feel insecure just focus on those things, they will boost your confidence. If you feel that doesn't work, try acting confident think of someone you admire and look up to and what they would do if they felt this way. I hope this hasd helped.
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Well the first thing you need to do is acknowledge that you have a identitiy issue ,when it comes to feeling complacent about who you really are . To be content, you need to recognize problems/issues that will help you come content on your life. This involves the way you live your life as well . You really need to acknowledge the way you live your own life because it's like an organization process. You start with the most important : your life . After acknowledging this, acknowledge the strife which may cause your life to be a bit unbalanced. Once you're done , you need to focus on what makes you insecure. You know what to do with this. Acknowledge these insecurites and you have to find a way of your very own to deal with them . Deal with them comfortably and in your very own way . Try to keep things very organized . Love yourself and Reward yourself with accomplishments . Don't let insults make you feel inferior because let them excite you . Because they want something you have and that's the purpose of insults. So worry not Carrie and I'm sorry for the length.
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k, well, it was the same for me. when something hurts you, dont let them know it. just always say, "yah, i can do this!" always think positive, and believe that you can do something.
try to smile and not frown because then that way people will see that you are happy. also if you always have a positive attitude, you will get a better grade! try that!
hope I helped-
-*KeLs*-
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